Spotted by Gretchen in the resort town of Mount Maunganui, New Zealand:
related: A clue that your whole “half-caf, extra hot, non-fat dressing-on-the-side” thing might be a bit much
FILED UNDER: "polite notice" · most popular notes of 2012 · New Zealand · p.s. · restaurant
While I don’t object to the nature of the note, I do believe they downloaded its template from http://www.wedontgiveashithowlongyouwaitforyourfood.com
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:16 am rating: 0
In case you were wondering, http://www.dontbesuchamiserablesod.com redirected me right back to http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com. Fitting.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:20 am rating: 11
Much respect for getting http://www.dontbesuchamiserablesod.com to point here : )
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:01 am rating: 5
Hands up if you’ve tried http://www.dontbesuchamiserablesod.com
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:27 am rating: 18
There are many adjectives for this notice, but polite is not one that comes to mind.
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:31 am rating: 21
dontbesuchamiserablesod.com redirects back to this post.
I appreciate how much thought has been put in to this.
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:42 am rating: 75
If I saw this on the wall of a restaurant, I’d walk right the fuck back out, joke or no.
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:01 am rating: 36
I think you need to visit http://www.dontbesuchamiserablesod.com yourself.
Oct 11, 2012 at 4:12 am rating: 11
Once again proving that the sign works.
Oct 11, 2012 at 5:30 am rating: 133
I’d walk out just because I can’t be assed to wait 30 minutes for takeout.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:44 am rating: 8
do you get ‘assed’ alot?
Oct 11, 2012 at 6:00 pm rating: 15
If I saw this sign in a restaurant I would quickly become a regular, and hope it’s not a joke.
Oct 14, 2012 at 11:01 pm rating: 17
Oi you, wot’s a grot doin’ noticin’ zog all on my watch?
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:14 am rating: 4
haha, I love it! I hate it when I’m in line somewhere, it’s obviously busy, and you have those few people that are acting like dicks. They do need to chill out. And if you can’t see the humor in the sign, then you are probably one of those people. Maybe not, but probably
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:21 am rating: 109
Yes, but only if the place is obviously busy. There have been times when I’ve been the only customer and have waited a very long time because the staff was “busy”. I’m still not sure how that is possible. But I usually don’t go back to those places, so it works out nicely.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:00 am rating: 20
Just because the place isn’t bursting at the seams with customers doesn’t necessarily mean that the staff can’t be legitimately busy.
In fast food joints (or any place similar), that’s the only time they have to restock stuff and make sure they have everything handy for when throngs of people do show up. If your order isn’t getting filled in a timely manner, chances are it’s because the person is wasting time fetching things they should have on hand.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:31 am rating: 13
Foster in NZ
Plus, a lot of takeaway joints (in NZ anyway) will be busy cooking phone orders – so they will be flat out busy, even if you’re not surrounded by other walk-ins.
The sign is right and to be honest, as a NZer myself I’d expect to wait 30 mins for takeaways to be cooked in a busy shop. These stores aren’t pre-preparing stuff McDonalds style (even if it is deep-fried) so you might as well enjoy the ride and chill on the beach dudez. xx
Oct 16, 2012 at 1:20 am rating: 7
I’m pretty sure I can tell the difference between busy without visible customers and “busy”.
Oct 16, 2012 at 7:18 am rating: 3
I would never leave this restaurant.
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:39 am rating: 27
‘Go for a walk, then come back and enjoy your cold food!’
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:41 am rating: 35
I want to buy this restaurant ! First order of business is to order this as a permanent professionally done sign.
Oct 11, 2012 at 3:24 am rating: 18
I love this, it made me laugh and I bet I’d like the owners and the restaurant. I also love the miserable sod reactions it’s getting.
Oct 11, 2012 at 4:11 am rating: 51
So you can’t see how that might off-putting to reasonable people? I do understand that restaurants get busy, the kitchen can only produce so many orders at one time, etc. All you have to do is tell me, as I start ordering, that it might be 20 or 30 minutes to get my food. Plenty of restaurants do exactly that without all the attitude. If I can’t wait that long, I can politely say “thanks for letting me know, I can’t afford to wait that long today. See you another time.”
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:27 pm rating: 3
This could’ve been written much shorter.
‘Hello, this restaurant is staffed by laz.. sorry, ‘tired’ staff who provide slow service when they can be bothered.’
Way to not advertise your business, buddy.
Oct 11, 2012 at 5:56 am rating: 14
So you’ve never been to a place during peak vacation time that’s been so insanely busy you wonder how the staff finds time to breath? Only to watch as someone calls staff members names over things they can’t control? Until you just want to go over and rip that butthead’s throat out?
You must never go on trips or eat out then.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:10 pm rating: 80
You sound entitled.
Oct 11, 2012 at 4:27 pm rating: 13
I remember working at a cafe next to a mall around Christmas.
Needless to say, no matter how fast we went, the line was perpetually out the door until after 9 pm. If you still think workers under those conditions are lazy, please feel free to take over the job yourself. Oh, and remember that you’d be doing it 5 days a week, for the length of Christmas rush…
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:19 pm rating: 35
You’ve never worked in the customer service industry, have you?
Joa, I sympathize, I worked in a post office around Christmas :/
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:35 pm rating: 18
Christmas at the mall is summer time at the library when the summer reading program is going. Just throw in some people cranky because they have to wait to use a computer and new parents finding out they did have a card back when they were single & childless and they owe $60+ in fines for lost books…. and somehow, even though I wasn’t even working there at the time, their fines are my fault.
And meanwhile the lines are growing longer and longer and no one is willing to use the self check out and every parent has 50 picture books and every 5th person either doesn’t have a card or can’t find it and think I can find them by name even when they have a name like “John Smith” because “No one has my name” and – and -
*pants* Um, sorry about that. Just – well – heh…. What can I say but -
CALGON! TAKE ME AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oct 13, 2012 at 1:22 am rating: 19
^ You just dated yourself. And I remember those commercials.
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:06 pm rating: 5
Well, someone has to date me, it might as well be myself. No arguing over which movie to go to or where to eat. No fussing over who’s paying the bill. Only difficulty is in kissing myself goodnight.
Oct 15, 2012 at 2:01 pm rating: 12
I bet this restaurant is awesome. No sarcasm.
Oct 11, 2012 at 6:36 am rating: 44
I greatly enjoy that the provided web address redirected back to this site. xD
And I know exactly how those sorts of customers are, working in customer service. Calm down, take a chill pill. Everyone else is waiting too and we’re stuck here working as hard as we can. ;D
Oct 11, 2012 at 7:02 am rating: 29
A lot of people bothered by this have never worked in food service. I worked at a popular local bakery during college: on Fridays we would have a line out the door, waiting on people as fast as humanly possible, and every customer would feel the need tell us how ‘slow ‘ we were. (Expect the one woman who complained that I was waiting on people ‘too fast’ and she felt it was ‘intimidating’, which just proved to me that customers will NEVER be happy no matter what you do.)
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:02 am rating: 86
I was never in food services but was in a tourist town and the fastest cashier in the store. Still got complaints about waiting on line (when EVERY register was open) as well as the “going to fast and that’s rude.” Whatever. Guess what people, you all go to the same place/event at the same time; you create your own crowds. If you really hate it that’s what off season is for – or at least have lunch early or late and not right at noon when 90% of the other tourists are.
I think the sign is great. I can leave my name & order and then go sit on the beach/dock? Sound great to me!
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:10 pm rating: 29
Ditto. I worked in a T-shirt shop in Ketchum, ID, for a year. Tourists are the worst. They leave their brains at home, and their civility, too. They expect to be treated like royalty. It’s their vacation, and it better be perfect, and YOU are the one standing in the way. Glad to be out of that scene before I killed one of them.
Oct 18, 2012 at 9:55 pm rating: 2
This is awesome. People have been way too conditioned to believe “the customer is always right”, and they believe that includes cooking food faster than humanly possible. Your dinner is not more important than the person who ordered five minutes before you. No matter what your mother told you, you are not that special.
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:06 am rating: 89
“Well, sure, we can get it out here 10 minutes faster, just for you. You don’t mind a little salmonella in your food, right? The chicken will be a bit raw.”
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:21 pm rating: 26
I love this! I worked in food service for many years, people can be such dicks. They make an excellent point also, if you’re on vacation, RELAX!
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:24 am rating: 34
They probably like spending their vacation bossing other people around. It must be a welcome change from their day job of being bossed around themselves.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:33 am rating: 19
I’ve worked customer service, and also waited tables, managed customer facing businesses.
I’d fire whomever wrote this note.
Yes, the people who stand there staring at you, acting incredulous that you don’t have the ability to hand them their food immediately are dickheads. But they have money, and as a business owner, I want them to give me their money.
Clearly the sign offended a number of people in this thread. This isn’t turning away a single, unrepentant asshat, who isn’t worth putting up with, it’s insulting a significant number of people.
Now maybe the food is so good that people will put up with a public anti-customer message, or maybe they’re the only game in town. But this sign is the kind of thing that tends to shut down restaurants.
For all the employees who love it, I get that. It’s saying all those things you wish you could. But it’s not the store/restaurant’s role to dictate the personality of their clients. It’s just a dumb move.
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:38 am rating: 36
Your post translates to “I have no sense of humor.”
If a person is offended by this sign then perhaps that restaurant isn’t for them.
The customer IS NOT always right.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:46 am rating: 77
Congratulations, you are the target audience of the sign and the reason the sign exists.
Stop being so easily offended and upset and just relax. Enjoy life.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:57 am rating: 48
You do realise it was probably the owner who wrote the sign, right?
Oct 11, 2012 at 10:11 am rating: 51
Relax and enjoy life? Uhm, that’s a great way to formerly have run a failed business.
Customers aren’t always right, and often enough are utter assholes.
BUT THEY HAVE THE MONEY THE BUSINESS OWNER WANTS.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:50 am rating: 16
Sorry to be blatantly generalizing, but the asshole / super-demanding customers generally don’t spend enough to make putting up with them worthwhile (in an economic sense).
Besides, there are a lot of restaurants that don’t put up with customer crap and are still successful. The soup Nazi in Seinfeld was based on one of the many real NYC restaurants where the staff doesn’t put up with any crap people throw at them. And if you’ve ever travelled outside the US, you know that “customer is always right” is mostly an American thing.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:22 pm rating: 42
We vote with our money basically every day. We have almost infinite options for really anything we could ever want. Need peanut butter? Creamy? Chunky? Extra chunky? Natural? Low fat? Stir kind? No sugar added? Organic? PB and jelly combination? What type of jelly? What size jar? I haven’t even gone into brands yet.
Brian’s point isn’t that a demanding customer is always right, just that you have so many options in the marketplace of food service or – hell – FOOD at any given time that you probably have the luxury to walk away if you find one little part of the experience annoying, like a dirty counter or a note warning you that you better have time to burn. That’s all. I think the note is funny and I’d place an order, but I have left restaurants for waiting too long and I have canceled orders due to poor customer service. My money isn’t much, but it’s mine, and I’m not going to spend it at a shitty place when I can just go somewhere else.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:42 pm rating: 30
Yeah, like Dan said, the owner is the most likely one who wrote it. Not an employee. Probably got tired of seeing his (or her) employees abused.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:52 pm rating: 15
If you know you have a crunch during the holidays, do what other stores do – hire more people. Sense of humor or no, everyone’s time has value and telling your customers to pump their brakes isn’t the best way to keep them as customers. How about giving them a (small) something for their patience, ya know, a form of appreciation?
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:37 pm rating: 10
You know, this restaurant probably has enough business to keep it from failing. Not everything is based on money. The owner could possibly be a retiree who is more interested in quality of life than turning 50 cents into a dollar. Patience is a virtue. And laughter is the best medicine, so lighten up everyone!
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:15 pm rating: 26
… honestly, this was almost certainly written by the owner/manager of the restaurant, so there’s nobody TO fire.
And, uh, this doesn’t read as that rude to me. Not everywhere in the world has the same attitude towards and expectations of customer service as the US. As a NZer, I find this funny – and I expect many of the people who read it do as well (and then follow its advice).
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:23 pm rating: 39
D’you know what? If the restaurant has a great reputation and is really busy, why should they serve arseholes?
If there are plenty of pleasant customers, feed them and let the arseholes go elsewhere and everyone will be happier.
I don’t know why people think that because they’re spending money they are entitled to being treated like gods. Spending money somewhere does not mean that you get to behave like a prat, and this restaurant is perfectly within it’s rights to tell the dickheads to stop being dickheads.
Oct 12, 2012 at 3:31 am rating: 35
I’m thinking that the owner either put the sign up or knows about it (notice that it is laminated). I expect it is some place with great food, and they are not worried about people leaving.
Personally, I’d like it if more places let you know the expected wait times before you get seated & order. That way if I’m in a rush I can leave & do fast food. Otherwise I’ll order a drink and chill. The choice is mine & I like that.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:18 pm rating: 15
This is in New Zealand, possibly the second most chilled out tourist destination in the world behind the pacific islands.
Kiwis don’t really have time for those with a carrot stuck in dark places, you can take your money down the road but they’ll have the same Laissez faire attitude, or you could just to McDonalds but then, hey, what sort of vacation is that?
When in Rome…
Oct 12, 2012 at 3:39 pm rating: 21
You act as if the asshats who leave in a huff after reading this sign is less of a loss of business than the business gained by the people who go eat there because of this sign and the increased quality of food and service resulting from the improved staff morale, atmosphere and lower staff turnover.
Oct 14, 2012 at 11:12 pm rating: 11
Ali, I am mostly with Brian (as a former small business owner). The sign has a hipster attitude that not everyone is going to appreciate, and not all of those people are automatically douchebags who will insult everyone when their order takes 15 minutes instead of 12. Your idea is what I advocate – when the prep time is longer than “normal”, just say something to people at the beginning of the interaction so they can decide if that wait is reasonable.
Yes, there will still be dickheads who bitch after being told 20-25 minutes, but I’m one of those who wouldn’t really like the sign but would accept the time estimate and then decide. If I can’t wait, I would just say “sorry, that won’t work tonight. Thanks anyway.”
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:33 pm rating: 3
I own a restaurant. We’re in a country undergoing the worst recession we’ve ever had, with a 25% unemployment rate. I see restaurants failing literally every day, even places that had been working forever and were practically a landmark of the city. Still, my place opens with a full house every weekend and people make reservations weeks in advance in a city where you can walk in during the Saturday night almost everywhere.
Now, our success is probably caused by a miriad of factors, but I think one of the main reasons is our no-bs policy regarding customers. We don’t tolerate a-holes. If you want to be a jerk, I don’t care how much money you have: go be a jerk somewhere else. My staff won’t tolerate being badly treated.
As a result my staff is genuinely happy and having fun as they work, and our customers on some level notice that the smiles are real. Our reviews always make a point of remarking what a nice ambiance we have and how friendly the staff is. Some customers have told me that they keep coming because they feel at home here, surrounded by friends.
So, you know, perhaps that “servers have to bend over backwards because we want ALL THE MONEY” mindset isn’t as effective or making you as much money as you think.
Oct 17, 2012 at 4:45 am rating: 18
Yay, Nemo. As a small business owner myself, I totally agree. Some people are going to be asshats no matter what, and sometimes it is SO much better to politely decline to work with them. I don’t need my soul painfully sucked out of my body while bending over backward (ow!), and then to have the person still be an unappreciative jerk. We cut our losses at my business, and we are all happier that way. And busy as heck, I might add.
Oct 18, 2012 at 10:02 pm rating: 4
“I’m a fast cook I guess!”
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:51 am rating: 10
What? I’m sorry I was over there. Did you just say you were a fast cook? Are we to believe that boiling water soaks into a grit faster in your kitchen than any place on the face of the earth?
Perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove. Were these magic grits? Did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans?
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:51 am rating: 35
Grits can’t soak up any boiling water until they reach the pot. Maybe he’s a fast cook in the sense that he moves with purpose and urgency.
Oct 11, 2012 at 10:07 am rating: 5
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:10 pm rating: 0
Pigs like peakaboo
Just so you know I got yor reference to My Cousin Vinny
Oct 11, 2012 at 7:47 pm rating: 4
So did I. It appears that a couple of people have never seen My Cousin Vinny.
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:21 pm rating: 4
Great sign, but seriously, DON’T FEED SEAGULLS. EVER. Sure, it’s cute in May, when they timidly come up to you and eat a french fry that you hold out for them. In August, you can’t eat ANYTHING anywhere near the beach, they’ll steal it right out of your hand and attack you for it. And people food really isn’t good for them anyway.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:07 am rating: 32
Agreed. Never feed seagulls. I grew up in a beach town. Our seagulls were never bold enough to attack you for food, but if you were ever foolish enough to feed seagulls while dining outside they might try to swoop down and steal food left unattended and they would most definitely call down a hoard of gulls that would hover over your party and crap all over everything. Tourists used to always feed the seagulls on the 15 minute ferry ride to town, leaving a captive audience of people and cars vulnerable to a rain of bird crap.
I liked this sign. I used to work in a myriad of shops and restaurants in my beach town growing up and in addition to regularly getting incredibly slammed during the seasonal months beach towns are more inclined to posting sassy signage and attributing it to the relaxed “beachy” attitude.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:56 am rating: 12
I once saw a man feeding the gulls french fries from his table at an outdoor restaurant. When another patron asked him to stop, he got real angry and loud about it. While he was turned around berating the other customer for not minding her own business, a seagull stole his whole hamburger. Instant karma, bitch. #truestory
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:59 am rating: 84
In the 5th grade, my class went on a boat cruise of San Francisco Bay. Some tourist was feeding a seagull a french fry. He turned to his friend to laugh, and while he was looking away, the seagull stole the whole basket of fries. I hope the seagull enjoyed the overpriced fries.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:48 pm rating: 16
While the seagulls in your beach towns steal your french fries and burgers, the birds in my desert town steal your eyeballs and fingers.
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:30 pm rating: 4
The birds in your town led by a single large bird that bears a striking resemblance to a bald, overweight English man?
Oct 16, 2012 at 3:39 pm rating: 2
If you can’t see the humor in this sign, then you are probably the kind of person it was made for. We in the customer service industry (most of us) do our best to make our customers happy, but we are only humans & the speed in which we can serve you is often hampered by the speed of technology, physics, how soon some foods take to reach the proper temperature that we are legally required to cook your food to, and possibly the customers that came before you. Customer service is getting worse because customers are getting worse.
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:22 am rating: 51
Customer Service is getting worse for 3 reasons.
1. Companies think it’s all about price competition, and so have stopped paying for great service.
2. A growing sense of entitlement on part of workers. If you work in a call center, part of your job is to take abuse. It’s always been that way. It was that way 25 years ago when I was on the phones, and it’s no worse now. The difference is, 25 years ago we accepted it as the nature of the beast. If you didn’t like it, you didn’t work in a call center.
3. Customer’s want service, but they don’t want to pay for it. If your fast food restaurant raised prices by 5% to hire/train/enforce top notch customer service, people would go to the crappy place down the street that’s 5% cheaper, and complain about the bad service.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:58 am rating: 17
So you’re saying that if you don’t want to take abuse on the job, you have a sense of entitlement? I don’t think so. Using that logic, women working in a mostly male environment should just “accept” sexual harassment as part of the job, as I’m sure many women have been forced to do in the past and probably still continue to do presently. Just because abuse happens doesn’t make it right.
An example of a sense of entitlement on the part of the employee would be the discussion from that note a few weeks ago about some people in retail being pissed at shoppers simply for asking whether there’s more of a certain item in the back, which is perfectly reasonable question if asked politely, once.
Your job as a waiter is to provide efficient, respectable service; accommodate your customer’s wants/needs within reason; and make their experience as enjoyable as possible. Nowhere does it say you must be willing to take abuse from rude patrons. Taking abuse shouldn’t be part of any job description.
Oct 11, 2012 at 6:18 pm rating: 53
Oh, HELL no. Taking abuse is not “part of the job”. At no point in the job requirement does it say “putting up with bullshit from assholes”.
Abusing call center workers is the hallmark of a douchebag. Not something they should have to cheerfully accept as part of the job. Fuck that noise.
Oct 12, 2012 at 2:15 am rating: 40
Poltergeist, if you work in customer service…then yes, I think that the idea that you don’t have to take abuse from customers is a feeling of entitlement to a pleasant work experience.
Now are their limits? Of course there are. Nobody should be subjected to threats, racial or gender based pejoratives, sexual harassment, etc.
But getting yelled at? That’s part of the job. Being called a moron? Part of the job. Dealing with self important asshats who think they’re better than you? Part of the job.
Oct 12, 2012 at 9:24 am rating: 4
‘But getting yelled at? That’s part of the job. Being called a moron? Part of the job. Dealing with self important asshats who think they’re better than you? Part of the job.’
What a load of baloney. Your attitude only allows the sort of garbage that some customers pull. If those in customer service (or, rather, the managers of those in customer service) stopped letting that sort of crap fly then it’d stop happening.
Oct 12, 2012 at 11:03 am rating: 23
And the customers would stop giving the employers their money.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:40 pm rating: 2
Uh, no. It’s much better to attract new patrons than to encourage a few assholes to keep coming back to abuse your employees. If your business couldn’t survive without that dirty money, then you have some major issues that are going to catch up to you eventually.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm rating: 22
I definitely agree that nobody should be subjected to abuse on the job or be expected to put up with abuse on the job. Verbal abuse is damaging in many ways. I wish more managers or store owners would realize that. It damages employee morale and happiness, which results in lower job performance and higher turnover, which results in more costs paid hiring and training new employees – probably more than it costs to simply throw assholes out of the store and refuse their business. And perhaps if we did that, the assholes would start learning basic courtesy and manners (or maybe run out of places to shop!). The world would be a much better place.
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:36 pm rating: 24
But it would be more appropriate to deal with the abusive customers directly than to put up a bunch of notes that are supposed to be funny but might be interpreted by plenty of reasonable customers as mean.
If a customer is consistently abusive, fire the customer. If employees are abusive back to the customer, fire the customer and the employee.
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:48 pm rating: 2
I would say this to those that believe that verbal abuse is okay because of the money that the abusers have:
I have stopped visiting restaurants due to management that allows people to abuse servers. It not only makes the servers uncomfortable, but it also makes many other patrons uncomfortable. That one abusive idiot may or may not come back, but I think it’s safe to say that 5 more customers will never return due to the uncomfortable dining experience.
I’ve also had the experience of witnessing an abusive patron being thrown out of a restaurant by the manager, and the rest of the patrons cheering once the idiot was gone. Many of those patrons will return, including me, who has been back several times.
Oct 15, 2012 at 2:01 pm rating: 23
and because of that stupid, overused mantra, “the customer is always right.” no-sometimes the customer is a stupid, selfish asshole.
Oct 15, 2012 at 3:11 pm rating: 10
As a call center employee for many years (and I’ve worked in several, all large companies), we’ve always been told NO, you do NOT take verbal abuse from customers. An employer can’t require you to accept verbal abuse as a part of your job. We’re always told “no retaliation”, but if someone begins swearing or namecalling, they’re given two warnings before the call is disconnected.
Oct 16, 2012 at 7:52 am rating: 8
I see the humour in the sign, but I would also leave any restaurant I saw it displayed it. Not because I’m a dick (although I am indeed a dick), but because I won’t line up for anything unless I absolutely need to. There is no food on this planet worth the same distress I experience lining up at a government kiosk or for a public washroom.
Oct 11, 2012 at 10:22 am rating: 17
Word. I am also a line hater. I actually get severe anxiety, like I’m going to mess up standing there. It’s completely irrational, I know, but if I walk into a place and see a long line, I’m gone. If there’s no line and just a long wait for my food, that’s cool.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:51 pm rating: 11
Exactly the reason to have such a sign. While the wording might not be perfect it lets people who can’t wait or who hate to be line know. This sound like a place where you can order and then wander. I don’t know NZ but I can SO see a sign like this in the FL keys or a lot of “hang loose” beach places (not so much in New England although they probably think the same thing).
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:25 pm rating: 8
Anyone offended by this obvious bit of humor is a brittle twat with a sense of entitlement and no perspective. Go stand in line for bread for days in a third world country, then piss and cry about your custom-made vacation food taking more than 30 minutes to cook. First world problems.
Oct 11, 2012 at 10:53 am rating: 56
Love this response!
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:27 am rating: 7
By that token, the letter writer should just be happy to have a job, right?
I mean, getting mean mugged by a customer is just about as first world problem as it gets.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:06 pm rating: 14
Unless it’s a comedy club, I don’t need to bring a sense of humor. Seems the punch line isn’t funny to the customers.
Just say at the outset “Wait time may be up to 30 minutes. We apologize for the delay” and leave the joke telling to the professionals.
Oct 11, 2012 at 1:43 pm rating: 14
Absolutely. They’re both first world problems, which doesn’t invalidate my point at all, which is “Have a sense of perspective.”
The little note clearly does not take itself too seriously, and merely lightheartedly asks other folks to do the same while they are waiting to be served the food of their choice at their vacation spot. I’m sorry that the suggestion of treating service staff like human beings bound by laws of time and physics offends your fragile sensibilities. I would frequent a restaurant like this MORE (if I could afford a vaction resort to New Zealand, of course).
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:25 pm rating: 24
THe sign clearly states that your food MIGHT take 30 minutes (or longer). Heck, that’s a standard minimum wait for many busy places on a typical Friday/Saturday night (which is why my boyfriend and I, ages 38 and 44, dine as if we were retired senior citizens and go at 5:30-6 p.m.).
If someone on *vacation* (or holiday, for you nonAmericans!) can’t chill and wait a half an hour for their food at a busy place, screw ‘em. They can go be self-entitled poopheads at another establishment.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:27 am rating: 31
And if enough of them do it…the place goes out of business.
As a customer, if you want my money, it happens on my terms. I’m not advocating making a scene, but if I walk into a sign that essentially reads “Our food takes a long time to cook and piss off if you don’t like it” I’m leaving.
If a sign says “At our busy periods it may take 30 minutes or more to receive your order, and we appreciate your patience” I’m not leaving, (unless I don’t have the time to wait, am too hungry to wait, etc).
That seems to be the part people are missing. How much of a sales drop do you think the average restaurant needs to (eventually) go under?
If it was less than 10% of customers, would the sign be necessary?
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:04 pm rating: 11
This is not the first business to post a sassy sign in their establishment. It’s fairly common in beach towns and other touristy locations, as well as shopping districts and whatnot that skew young and hip. I’ve worked in several places with similar signs, both food service and retail.
Most people–people who understand things like FUN and HUMOR–tend to get a kick out of them, and they often serve to break the tension when things get busy and folks start feeling entitled.
If you can show me one documented case of a sign like this causing a business to shut down I’ll be very surprised indeed. Calm down and learn to laugh!
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:39 pm rating: 26
I was at a festival in a tourist town. My friends and I walked into a restaurant that my friend, a native of the town, insisted we try. The owner looked absolutely miserable and complained to us that she had to stay “after hours” due to the festival traffic. It was 5:30 PM. When we placed an order, she said “no,” that she “wasn’t in the mood” to make what we ordered because it takes too much effort to prepare, and that we should order something else.
Oh yeah, these kinds of restaurants with all their quirks are super cute and fun to talk about, but I don’t live in Stars Hollow and I’d rather just get my food and get out on most days. Like I said above, I wouldn’t walk out from a note like this because it’s not too bad, but my general sentiment is that if you don’t want my money, I don’t want to give it to you.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:57 pm rating: 10
The “no one shuts down from this kind of thing” made me laugh. I’m a staff accountant who specializes in start up and small business. I can tell you that this type of thing deeply impacts business.
You want to know why? On a social level, because those of us, myself included, who don’t like this type of note may in fact be jerks… but we are exactly the sort of jerks who vote with out dollar. Not only are we not eating here, we are not eating here with a group and we are telling everyone we know that we don’t eat there. I’ll walk extra blocks to avoid that type of thing thus nullifying the most obvious strength a restaurant can have: Location.
That translates into money. Restaurants particularly have very low profit margins and have the highest failure rate of any new business. When your profit margins are thin, everyone matters.
And of course, that’s what Brian is saying. This letter says we don’t matter. And that’s just never true.
Beyond that, the sign only runs off those of us who care about it… a real jerk isn’t going to care or change his behavior anyway. So it’s a double negative.
Oct 11, 2012 at 3:38 pm rating: 19
The letter doesn’t imply that you don’t matter. They’re giving you a warning about the potential wait time, which is actually a very considerate thing to do. If you don’t want to potentially wait 30 minutes, you can, of course, choose to go somewhere else. However, if you stay, don’t get pissed that you have to wait 30 minutes like you know you might have to.
The only reason you would be offended at this sign is if you felt it was referring to you, in which case you obviously know that you are a rude customer and therefore don’t have any right to be angry at anything.
Oct 11, 2012 at 6:53 pm rating: 33
I’ve never acted impatient for food and I have worked in costumer service but I really find this note annoying and would avoid the establishment. It’s not that I’m “offended”. I just find it tl;dr, not very funny, and that I’m suddenly worried that if I have an actual complaint like the food being shitty that they will likely not care and may mock me. I don’t know, I’m just not the kind of person that wants to think that much about my food – I just want to go someplace where I can be polite but impersonal and eat. Why not just have a sign with the expect wait time and leave it at that. If a customer gets pissy you can just point at the sign and glare and then your just alienating the assholes rather than the socially awkward.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:43 am rating: 14
Brian’s reply campaign is growing an impressive mass. Yikes, man, did this post seriously offend you that much?
I’ve never worked in the food industry, but I DO work in a pharmacy – another high-stress environment where people assume their prescriptions will be ready five minutes after they leave their doctor’s office.
Particularly around the holidays, we’re packed as people hurry to get their prescriptions before they travel. The vast majority of our customers are wonderful and understanding about this… but it only takes two or three “miserable sods” to ruin my day.
Oct 11, 2012 at 12:50 pm rating: 34
Agreed, Jordie, to a large degree. I work a couple of jobs, one of which is a retail gig. I’m always amazed at the level of hostility and angst displayed by folks who have to wait five minutes longer than they think they should for anything. They are in a well-lighted, climate-controlled environment, wherein they can select a practically infinite variety of food, goods and medicine, all safe and individually packaged, not to mention they have other human beings specifically employed to help them find what they want and acquire it, and they’re just so angry. I’m bemused by the total intellectual disconnect and lack of perspective, but I can honestly say their bad tempers don’t don’t ruin my day. I feel pretty fortunate to be paid in said environment, rather than hauling water back to my corrugated metal shack from the stream that runs through the dump. Perspective.
Oct 11, 2012 at 2:42 pm rating: 21
I wasn’t offended by the sign, and don’t feel it was talking to me. I don’t give shit to the worst customer service folks, I simply talk politely with their manager. I am always polite, and am as upbeat as I can be. I know how hard customer service is.
I simply recognize that a sign that displays an antagonistic view of customers indicates an establishment that is not going to put the customer first. If you want my money, you will put me (as a customer) first (tied with all other customers).
As I said, a sign that politely warned of long wait times and thanked me for my patience would be perfectly fine.
Oct 12, 2012 at 9:20 am rating: 9
Translation: Rather than evaluating actual service, I will instead choose to feel antagonized by a humorous sign. Please, please stroke me and don’t say anything that doesn’t fit into the customer service robot language.
Oct 12, 2012 at 10:21 am rating: 17
I will judge you by what you give me to judge you. If what you give met to judge you is a notice that my business is not important to you, then I’ll take my business elsewhere.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:43 pm rating: 6
Well, what this business is hypothetically giving me is:
A) An estimated wait time during peak holiday periods (Thank you).
B) Notice that they prefer a sane and courteous environment for their guests AND employees (Congratulations…You’ve earned more of my business right there, provided the subsequent food and service are good).
C) An assumption that customers are mature and intelligent enough to enjoy a quirky and mildly humorous sign (Thanks again for treating your customers like grown-ups, instead of petulant spoiled children!)
Of course, in the absence of any sophistication or nuance, you could also just say:
“Sign different. Sign bad. Hulk SMASH!”
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:16 pm rating: 32
Jordie, instead of having your day ruined by some pissy customers who can’t wait 5 minutes for a damn prescription to be filled accurately, consider having some fun with them. Move in slow motion and see how mad they get. “Ohhh, you really want your anti-depressants now, don’t ya. Or maybe you wanted the stool softener. If only I could remember which pill was which.”
Oct 12, 2012 at 6:14 pm rating: 7
“If what you give met to judge you is a notice that my business is not important to you, then I’ll take my business elsewhere.”
It says a lot that you don’t realise just how egotistical that statement is.
Oct 15, 2012 at 1:12 am rating: 8
AlfaCowboy, I see it the reverse to you.
I actually think the sign is treating customers like petulant children instead of giving them the benefit of the doubt that they may actually be capable of behaving like reasonable adults.
I wouldn’t appreciate being pre-warned not to be a rude asshole, when I had no intention of being one to begin with. How about instead of insulting everyone by assuming they need to be told how to behave, the establishment employs competent managers who can deal with disgruntled customers directly?
Oct 15, 2012 at 9:21 am rating: 9
Since I’m never a rude asshole in restaurants, I wouldn’t feel that defensive about it, and would instead just appreciate the mildly humorous chutzpah. If you’re not a rude asshole, then you’re in on the joke. If you’re a rude asshole, well, this sign is for you
Oct 15, 2012 at 10:08 am rating: 9
You find it egotistical to say that my business is done on my terms? How so?
Oct 15, 2012 at 12:37 pm rating: 3
Guys, just give up on Brian.
Brian, we give up. You’re the center of the universe, and the only person in said universe that matters, all because you have $20 to spend on dinner.
p.s. : I hate the center of the universe.
Oct 15, 2012 at 2:23 pm rating: 6
Or, just read this note. By the time you’re done reading it, your food will be ready. Does anybody remember brevity?
Oct 11, 2012 at 3:11 pm rating: 12
I remember brevity. It used to be the soul of wit. Now the soul of wit is the ability to forward a meme.
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:14 pm rating: 35
Best reply yet, I actually put down my coffee cup and laughed out loud.
Oct 12, 2012 at 3:51 pm rating: 4
I agree completely, and I have a problem with brevity. Is there a support group or something?
Oct 12, 2012 at 10:15 pm rating: 4
I remember Brevity. But she got tired of waiting for her food and left.
Oct 16, 2012 at 10:03 pm rating: 5
Brevity. That bitch was always short with me.
Oct 18, 2012 at 10:08 pm rating: 3
As an employee at a counter-service coffee/sandwich shop that gets mega busy, I certainly appreciated the sentiment of this sign. I would love it if it were okay to tell every rude customer that we’re working as hard as we can, and if that isn’t enough for them they should make their own food. I’m a human with feelings though, and mean customers can ruin my day and that will continue to affect how I treat the next customer and so on. I do take things personally, and I find it next-to-impossible to respond with a smile to the guy who ordered his latte 3 seconds ago and is already asking where it is. Maybe Brian would say that I should get into another business, but I make a killer sandwich and I make it fast (I make a lot of sandwiches as fast as I can, and there’s still sometimes a wait!). I like signs like this because it shifts the sassiness from the employee, from whom it would be very rude, but it still gets out there.
I would love to hear about signage that’s actually helped restaurants deal with their customer issues. Our cafe used to have a very sassy sign directed towards customers who would continue cell-phone conversations while ordering, and now we have a much more mellow/polite version. I preferred the old version because on the off chance that a customer noticed the sign, they would laugh about it and apologize and, by contrast, I would get to be gracious and polite. Now that the new sign is polite, I just feel awkward when people notice it while committing the crime the note mentions.
Oct 11, 2012 at 5:14 pm rating: 24
Joolz, I don’t doubt you make a fine sandwhich and do so quickly. I don’t doubt that the complaints you get are almost exclusively invalid.
But if you want to work with the public you’ve got to learn to shake it off. Why let an asshole live rent free in your head?
Oct 12, 2012 at 9:31 am rating: 0
For the same reason that the asshole decides to be rude and ruin her day, Brian.
Is having a hissy fit over wait time really going to make your wait time any shorter? It’s possible that the only thing it will do is that you’ll get an inferior sandwich. This will just prompt you to come back and complain, thus spending the same amount of total time you would if you’d only waited for a good sandwich in the first place.
Oct 12, 2012 at 6:24 pm rating: 12
I don’t claim to understand what makes people behave like assholes. As I said, I’m not guilty of being one of the people the sign is designed for.
That doesn’t answer why you’d let some asshole determine what kind of day you’re going to have.
Oct 15, 2012 at 12:39 pm rating: 1
Maybe it’s just me, but 30 minutes sounds like a really long time for over-the-counter service, like a McDonald’s fast food joint. There’s no way I’m waiting 30 minutes for “fast food”. I could see if this was a sit down restaurant or something, but by the description it just sounds like counter service. If they take that long, they need to re-think the organization of their kitchen or expand.
Oct 11, 2012 at 6:43 pm rating: 4
I’ll wager half my holiday spending that this establishment is a fish and chip shop. Actually, since it’s in New Zealand, I’ll wager that it’s a fush and chup shop. Proper F&C* from a shop takes a while to cook anyway, and when they’re busy there’s usually a longer wait. Trust me, my father-in-law insists we go to the beach on Mother’s Day and order F&C, and it can be up to an hour in a shop where on a non-celebratory day your wait time is less than 10 minutes. And every shop in the area is the same, because the place we go is populated by lots of nursing homes, so the patients’ families all whisk Dear Old Mum out to the beach for a family feast of F&C just like old times…
*I say “proper” because it’s becoming more common to get re-cooked frozen fish rather than hand-filleted and battered. Same goes for chips, which is a shame, I used to love the little odd-bits of potato that were fried extra crispy due to their size…
Oct 11, 2012 at 8:41 pm rating: 23
The people complaining about this note have obviously never worked in a take-out restaurant. People show up at the lunch rush and then act like dicks because it takes a while. We are busting our ass trying to get everything done and in our restaurant, you can see all the cooking being done. Nobody is slacking,there are just dozens of orders all at one time! Are we magically supposed to make the grill bigger so it can fit all the orders at the same time??? Yet customers still act like @ssholes. Even after we TOLD them how long it was going to take. And they do stand at the counter and glare at you,which makes our job oh so much easier! Plus we all get paid crap to put up with it and bust our asses! So I LOVE this sign!!
Oct 11, 2012 at 9:27 pm rating: 18
If it’s busy ,it’s busy. If I see people hustling around what can you say.
On the other hand if I have to wait because someone is too busy BS’ing or farting around then I get irritated.
Oct 11, 2012 at 11:38 pm rating: 2
Totally respectable. I’ve been buying all my own goods and services since about the age of 17 (when I first found employment), and I can say that ONCE I had a genuinely shitty experience where employees (one teen, one middle-ager) were chatting incessantly rather than waiting on me when I was the only customer around (at an Orange Julius – I only waited and dealt with it because of the deliciousness). It was the only time I was EVER irritated, and I had the right to be. A busy place with everyone running around? Understandable even if it is an inconvenience – it’s not the workers’ fault. If everyone is doing as they should, if I wait in line for a damn hour, I won’t fault them.
Oct 12, 2012 at 5:38 pm rating: 4
Laughing at all the entitled customers in the comments. Good for you that you’ve never had to work a day in the service industry; if you had you’d be alittle more sympathetic to the humour in this note.
Oct 12, 2012 at 6:40 am rating: 10
I have worked in the industry. I waited tables and have managed casual dining. I’ve done 80 hour weeks between those jobs and call center work for about 8 years to be able to afford the life I wanted to live.
I’ve been called things that are absolutely horrible. I’ve been threatened, (actually had a guy show up outside the call center and had to call the cops), I’ve been insulted with the most vile words. I’ve sat in the back complaining about asshats in my time. So it’s not that I am “team entitled asshole”, so much as it’s “it doesn’t matter what I think of them”.
Oct 12, 2012 at 9:36 am rating: 3
The fact that you feel like you have to defend yourself so strongly throughout multiple conversations smacks to me that you’ve got a lot of beef against this sign. It really sounds as though, despite how often you mention that you are polite and courteous, you’re really not. You sound pretty entitled. That “I worked so hard so I get to do what I want” kind of entitled where “do what I want” isn’t “take a trip to bermuda and smile” but “act as though I am now better than people who I have now randomly decided have not worked as hard as me”
(Why did you mention the length of your workweeks? Are we supposed to feel sorry for your past 80 hour workweeks? Are we supposed to think you’re great and wonderful for working so hard? By your admission, workweeks like that are probably something people should “just put up with”, so maybe I should say a put-down or say you should have worked even harder…)
I dunno. I’m just saying, I don’t like you much. I probably wouldn’t want you in my establishment…
I’m assuming a lot of negative things about you, but I don’t really feel too bad about it. You made it personal first by mentioning so much information about yourself…
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:54 pm rating: 26
Sawmill, I was simply correcting the perception that I had no experience on the other side of the counter. I know how shitty the job can be.
As to the rest of your point, you’ll have to forgive my lack of concern that some random person doesn’t like the two dimensional characterization they painted of me.
I mean, sure, if you dismiss what I say without evidence, then you can make me the big bad wolf yelling at every cashier I come across. The truth is, I don’t do that. I just stop frequenting establishments with bad customer service.
Because I do feel entitled to spend my money where and how I want.
Oct 15, 2012 at 12:44 pm rating: 2
I love that the website listed on the flyer redirects to PAnotes.com
Oct 12, 2012 at 8:45 am rating: 0
I think the greatest thing about this note is that it suggests that the manager respects their workers and has a sense of perspective, rather than just accepting that customer abuse is justified in pursuit of business.
Oct 12, 2012 at 10:41 am rating: 17
I agree with you, Daniel. Unfortunately, a few folks on this thread (and lots in the world) obviously buy into the idea that it’s unreasonable for service industry to expect courtesy and patience while working hard to serve customers. They buy into that concept so completely that their tiny little hardwired brains get thrown all out of gear when an establishment humorously requests that customers treat their staff well.
Oct 12, 2012 at 10:48 am rating: 15
Welcome to the real world. If a job was fun and intrinsically rewarding, you wouldn’t have to bribe people to do it.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:45 pm rating: 1
Yes, insults. Really.
I don’t need your silly little welcome to the “real world.” I’ve been gainfully employed for many, many years. I know how reimbursement for labor works, thanks! You, apparently, do not, as lots and lots of folks have jobs that are fun and rewarding, and still accept “bribes” for them. My day job is a good example.
The fact that this harmless sign gets so far under your skin displays perfectly why it, and the attitude behind it, are so refreshing. Asking customers to treat your employees courteously, in a humorous tone even, is completely reasonable. The fact that you see it as unreasonable, even offensive, is a perfect example of the childish and entitled attitude so many folks possess. Congratulations!
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:32 pm rating: 21
Oh! I just got it. I just understood Brian.
Shitty asshole customers and those horrible long workweeks completely ruined the idea that a job could be good to him. He suffered a lot at his job and thinks everyone else should as well because of that. He consoled himself by saying “customer service is always like this. You just have to put up with the shitty customers for the paycheck” Now he’s grown up and bitter from his past terrible customer service experiences.
Basically, we’re trying to tell you that it doesn’t have to be that way. Everyone should work at a job that they feel fulfilled at – and customer service can be plenty fulfilling when there’s no asshole customers, by the way.
Oct 12, 2012 at 2:07 pm rating: 23
Fulfilled? I feel fulfilled when I get a paycheck that allows me to buy the things I want (within reason). My level of fulfillment is directly related to the level of my pay.
Oct 16, 2012 at 2:28 pm rating: 2
Amy In Toronto
My favourite thing in this note is the suggestion to go chat with the “boaties” as they bring in their catch. I’m surprised no one has even mentioned the boaties yet, or their reaction to this sign. For example, I wonder if the fishermen/fushermen (that is exactly how NZ’ers would say it!) are curious as to why they suddenly saw a spike in the number of people chatting with them as they bring in their bounty, since this sign went up. Or maybe they don’t want to chat with hungry tourists and/or locals who are distracting themselves while they wait for food.
Why hasn’t anyone thought of the boaties?!
I love the sign for that word alone.
Oct 12, 2012 at 11:06 am rating: 14
Boaties… I’ve said that word like 10 times and now it sounds weird.
Oct 12, 2012 at 3:58 pm rating: 5
I think some of the angst here is based on regional differences. This is a sign that, as I and others have mentioned, fits the beach town ethos – slow down & sip some rum. It wouldn’t work everywhere. Just as I don’t mind if a dinner waitress calls me “Hon,” “plunks” the food down in front of me, and gives me a plastic ketchup bottle, I wouldn’t like it if I got the same service at a a fine dining establishment. You adjust your expectations to your location (and enjoy the differences) or you’ll be pissed off a lot.
Oct 12, 2012 at 12:38 pm rating: 19
That’s ridiculous, Ali. Every establishment everywhere must stick to the script and communicate only in language and tone acceptable to the lowest common denominator. Assuming that any customers anywhere are sympathetic, understanding or (gasp!) possessed of a sense of humor is utterly unacceptable.
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:02 pm rating: 16
The leaked Apple customer service manual for “Apple geniuses” comes to mine, Alfa. *shudder*
If anything will truly drive you bananas, that manual certainly will.
Oct 12, 2012 at 6:34 pm rating: 1
No joke, Kermit. I couldn’t read much of it. Things like that make me very tired.
Oct 12, 2012 at 10:19 pm rating: 0
I’m getting all stressed out reading this PAN. I need to go to a resort in New Zealand to relax. I’ve heard Mount Maunganui is nice.
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:49 pm rating: 15
Awesome, as always, The Elf. I’d buy you a pint if I could get away.
Oct 12, 2012 at 2:02 pm rating: 0
The sandwich shop I work at has similar signs: “We serve GOOD food, not FAST food.” and “When it’s gone, it’s gone!”
They take the pressure off the server when we’re crowded (as a 5-man business, it’s pretty hectic sometimes) when we’re busy or sell out of the special or soup or something and someone feels the need to whine about it.
Oct 12, 2012 at 3:21 pm rating: 3
I love the sign. When I was a box office clerk at the local theatre (the only one on my island and therefore INSANELY BUSY), my boss would put me on alone because I was so quick, and I’d have a line-up of (literally) 900 people, out the door and down the block, I’d still fly through them at super-human speed. For every person that said, “WOW. YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE TWO PEOPLE ON, YOU KNOW”, as if I had REQUESTED to work alone, as if my 18-years-old (at the time) self had any say in the matter, made me frustrated beyond belief. I kept a smile on my face. I kept working faster than humanly possible. But oh, to have been able to have a sign like this.
It doesn’t make a retail employee “entitled” to think they deserve to be treated like a human being, not as a sounding box for complaints that, if valid at all, need to be directed at someone in charge.
On the other hand, as a customer – nothing bothers me more than someone who complains and acts like a jerk at places like the bank, the grocery store, Wal-Mart, etc. – anywhere with a line. It doesn’t matter if I’ve never worked there, have been waiting there just as long as they have, or am just as frustrated (no one enjoys as line up) – there is NO NEED to act like a jerk. It won’t help matters, and generally, one knows what they’re getting into, depending on the establishment – just go somewhere else if you really need to make a scene like a tantrum-throwing child about it. So, even as a consumer and NOT an employee, I’m grinning at the note. I don’t find it rude, just straightforward (and obvious to anyone sensible).
Oct 12, 2012 at 5:31 pm rating: 22
I am lucky enough to have a batch (aka beach house) in this area – If this is the takeaway place I think it is, it does get manic crazy uber busy in the peak of summer. The food is great though, and really, in beach towns everything is pretty chill ( more than usual anyway!)
Oct 13, 2012 at 4:21 am rating: 3
Let us know, Queenie. Is it a Fush and Chup shop? If so I’ll make sure to drop in next time I’m visiting the rellies on the North Island.
Oct 15, 2012 at 12:25 am rating: 1
Seconding the Fish & Chips shop theory. Which means that:
1) It’s probably very good. Good enough that they can get away with this, because it won’t offend the locals (and it’s got a prime spot beside the beach, so of course they’d go to it).
2) Food is probably fresh. From-the-local-boats fresh*. Which means no reheating from frozen stuff, it means more time being spent, and no time to prepare it the night before. Assume it’s like highly-specialised restaurant-food. You’d wait 30 minutes in a restaurant for your food, or longer. But the problem with doing that in a fish and chips shop is;
3) The waiting-for-food area is probably pretty small. The best fish & chips shops have had, in my experience, two things in common. The first is a large menu board with easy-to-read text, and the second is a very small amount of room for customers to stand around in and wait for (or rarely, there might be bar stools, but not many, and crammed in there). The advice to go for a half hour walk sounds like a good plan to me, it’s certainly what we used to do in high school.
*Which is not to say that the very best of the fish and chips shops are always of the from-the-boats fresh kind. There were two of those in one village I lived in, and one was very very good, and the other was a total dive. Meanwhile in deepest darkest Karori, where the fish truck came once a week to deliver to this tiny shop, the fish and chips there were literally award-winning, and had the trophies to prove it.
Oct 13, 2012 at 7:05 am rating: 10
Pizzas and burgers – I haven’t found a decent fish and chip shop at the mount yet unfortunately
Oct 18, 2012 at 4:15 pm rating: 0
Personally, I LOVE this note.
It seems to be a holiday-crunch, and actually, I would love to be reminded of just taking a deeeep breath and calm down when things go crazy around me.
Yes, we always seem to be under time-pressure… so, actually getting a reminder to just chill out for half an hour seems great ^^.
Oct 13, 2012 at 8:37 am rating: 5
Judging by the amount of complaints about this note, I’d say that this is a fairly good example of the differences between Kiwi lifestyle/humour and American lifestyle/humour
Oct 14, 2012 at 3:19 pm rating: 13
I don’t know about anyone else, but all the comments about New Zealand in regards to this sign makes me wish I had the money to go visit there.
Oct 14, 2012 at 5:24 pm rating: 12
You spelled “live” wrong. And me, too.
Oct 15, 2012 at 6:11 pm rating: 5
Well, it’s all a question of the wild life. If they have bird eating spiders and giant snakes like their neighbors in Australia, visiting is just fine by me.
Oct 15, 2012 at 9:20 pm rating: 2
Nope, no snakes or bad creepy crawlies – we have the kiwi, tui, non bitey things. No sharks either :p
Oct 16, 2012 at 10:24 am rating: 1
Well, if you’re telling this ignorant American the truth and not just making good natured fun of me than I might consider live if I had the money to move there. Because I would love to be in a place where it’s not seen as evil if you tell off an annoying or mean customer/patron.
Oct 16, 2012 at 3:42 pm rating: 1
We don’t have bird eating spiders (or really any poisonous spiders) and we don’t have any snakes at all, but we DO have sharks – lots and lots of them.
we don’t have many shark attacks though, and you don’t see them often
Oct 18, 2012 at 4:18 pm rating: 2
Eh, sharks aren’t so bad. They rarely attack people. And I’m not much of a beach person anyway.
Oct 19, 2012 at 8:11 am rating: 1
If they are so busy, why don’t they just hire more people? If they don’t have space, get a bigger restaurant. If they don’t have the money, take out a loan. If they can’t afford the payments, get out of the restaurant business. See? Simple solution to the problem. People will always be assholes, a sign won’t prevent them from being assholes.
Oct 15, 2012 at 11:09 am rating: 0
If you think this sign is to be taken too seriously you obviously don’t get Kiwi humour. Chill bro
This place would regularly get my business on principle alone.
As someone that’s worked various customer service jobs over the years, I want to hug the person that wrote this up and give them money for a nice dinner of their choosing.
Oct 16, 2012 at 11:20 am rating: 6
— The Elf
2011: The Top Notes of the Year
2010: The Funniest Notes of the Year
2009: The Best Notes of the Year
2008: Your Favorite Notes of the Year
Carnivores: keep being awesome!
actually totally reasonable
a little patronizing
clip art catastrophe
flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens
landlords and property managers
Moms & Dads
more aggressive than passive
most popular notes of 2010
most popular notes of 2011
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most popular notes of 2013
now that's management
sex sex sex
signed with love
spelling and grammar police
thanks (but not really)
unnecessary "quotation marks"
You call that punctuation?