26 responses so far ↓

• #1   Hirayuki

  It’s the inclusion of Thing 1 and Thing 2 that really make it a masterpiece–because, let’s face it: the poetry is abysmal.

  Dec 12, 2012 at 11:55 am   rating: 90  
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  • #1.1   JK

    I’m guessing the cause of the potty problem was the green eggs and ham. If you listen to Sam I Am, you pay for it in the end with a little food poisoning.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 10:19 pm   rating: 90  
     
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• #2   H for Toy

  You know what we haven’t had in a while? Bathroom limericks. I think it’s about time.

  Dec 12, 2012 at 2:14 pm   rating: 90  
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  • #2.1   Dane Zeller

    There was a young man from Nantucket,
    Whose toilet he could not flush it.
    The content of the Kohler one-holer,
    would always flow the bowl over.
    So he gave it to his mother-in-law in Pawtucket.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 8:10 am   rating: 90  
     

  • #2.2   H for Toy

    There once was a man from Kentucky
    Whose toilet was awfully sucky
    He flushed it once, twice
    And then even thrice
    If it worked, he thought he was lucky.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 3:35 pm   rating: 90  
     

  • #2.3   CarnivorousPlants

    There once was a man from Peru
    Who had a awful time flushing his poo
    It put up quite the fight
    Would not flow out of sight
    So he covered it with more tissue.

    Dec 15, 2012 at 11:38 pm   rating: 90  
     

  • #2.4   DaveGI

    Not a limmerick but it fits the subject:

    In olden days when knights were bold
    And toilets were not yet invented,
    They dumped their loads along the roads
    And walked away contented!

    Dec 18, 2012 at 2:38 pm   rating: 90  
     
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• #3   redank

  …so much time on their hands!

  Dec 12, 2012 at 2:34 pm   rating: 90  
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  • #3.1   The Elf

    Well, sometimes it takes a while. Coming up with poetry – even bad poetry – beats some other options.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 9:47 am   rating: 90  
     
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• #4   Captain Hampton

  Who in their right mind wants a toilet that burgles, anyway?

  Dec 12, 2012 at 3:24 pm   rating: 90  
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  • #4.1   backs away

    And why should a toilet ‘swirl’? I’m going to have nightmare about toilets swirling out of their stalls now…
    *runs* and *hides*

    Dec 13, 2012 at 1:37 am   rating: 90  
     

  • #4.2   Oppan

    I’m not sure if you’re being facetious, really, so take this next bit with a grain of salt…

    The swirling refers to the water in the toilet bowl, which on many toilets goes down in a swirling circular fashion when flushed.

    Unless they’re the super-powerful kind, then they just blast water straight at the exit and this usually results in water flying all over the seat as well. While it gets the job done, it also makes it impossible to leave the seat water-free for the next person. Wipe it up, flush the paper in the bowl to dispose and…oh…water on the seat again…

    Those toilets make everyone look their worst for the next user.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 10:14 am   rating: 90  
     
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• #5   George P

  Dr. Seuss understood the concept we call “meter”.

  Dec 12, 2012 at 3:33 pm   rating: 90  
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  • #5.1   kermit

    The meter-ic (or metric, if you will) system is oppressive to Americans. They snub it. Imperial is the only acceptable way to go.

    Dec 12, 2012 at 9:45 pm   rating: 90  
     

  • #5.2   GeekyMonkey

    The original poem is ok, but the response is appalling.

    Rhyming ‘course’ with ‘worst’? Unacceptable.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 4:56 am   rating: 90  
     

  • #5.3   kermit

    Maybe they’re from Boston. Or Minnesota.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 10:00 am   rating: 90  
     

  • #5.4   redheadwglasses

    Being a Minnesotan, I can confidently state that all poetry must have rhyme and meter. None of that freeform stuff. Lutherans like order.

    Dec 13, 2012 at 11:21 am   rating: 90  
     
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• #6   Sir Puke

  The poetry is low-grade for sure, but it conveys the message effectively. It shows effort, rather than something like: The toilets suck and so do you!
  Grade: A

  Dec 12, 2012 at 3:48 pm   rating: 90  
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• #7   TRT

  One fish, Two fish,
  Brown fish, Bad fish.

  Dec 13, 2012 at 6:08 am   rating: 90  
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• #8   Spencer

  The Fish needs to work on his scansion. Why do poetry at all if you’re not going to do it right? Especially since nothing is easier to write than rhyming couplets. No partial credit here.

  Dec 13, 2012 at 6:24 am   rating: 90  
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• #9   Kwjor

  Most of the time, isn’t the trick to hold down the handle rather than move it repeatedly?

  Dec 13, 2012 at 8:04 am   rating: 90  
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• #10   Tesselara

  Bad poetry–good point. If you have to push the handle down three times, there’s something wrong in Toiletland. Or maybe the toilet is on strike from being a poopburglar.

  Dec 13, 2012 at 8:47 am   rating: 90  
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• #11   t-rex

  Alas, the toilet did break
  A mess the toilet did make
  A plunger no where to be seen
  At work, now, I will only be peeing!

  Dec 13, 2012 at 12:11 pm   rating: 90  
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• #12   Kimberly

  Flushing a toilet a thousand times per visit hardly seems environmentally friendly.

  Dec 13, 2012 at 3:41 pm   rating: 90  
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• #13   Lita

  Burgling toilets?

  And all this time I thought it was the cat burglar.

  Dec 13, 2012 at 4:53 pm   rating: 90  
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• #14   Kathryn

  The first is snappy, clever and cute.

  The second I’d hardly dare call doggerel. Ugh. What a mess.

  Dec 18, 2012 at 9:49 am   rating: 90  
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