Six-year-olds make the best birthday cards

April 24th, 2013 · 23 comments

Brad in Nebraska says this birthday card from his six-year-old niece, Dani, stopped the whole family in its tracks. (With its awesomeness, I assume!) Mckenna, you are one lucky lady.

I love you when you are scared and also sweet I love you if you can't chew corn and I love you when you hate mama's meat Happy Birthday Mckenna

Happy “WTF?” Wednesday, everyone!

related: Mom likes Dad’s meat

FILED UNDER: birthday · kids · not so much passive-aggressive


23 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Batman

    Personally, I’ve always hated mama’s meat.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 8:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Beatus Mongous

      At least she didn’t mention Daddy’s meat. Now THAT would have been kind of scary.

      Apr 24, 2013 at 12:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Roto13

    Should have just stopped at “I love you when you are scared” imo.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 8:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   thrall

    Inscribed in Pink for that special “Bless your heart” twist of the knife.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 11:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   H for Toy

    I feel like this is the 6 year old version of those Hallmark “best friends even when we’re old” cards. I love you in good times and bad, and when we’re too old to chew corn anymore, but we’ll reminisce about the old days and how my mom was such a bad cook.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 1:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   The Elf

    …. Can’t chew corn? Anyone else puzzled why this one was called out specifically? “Mama’s meat” I just took to mean Brad doesn’t like SIL’s cooking, since she just doesn’t do it like Mom does and that is *wrong*. “Scared” might have just been talkinga bout garden variety fears, like from a horror movie. I get that.

    But can’t chew corn? What’s up with that, Brad?

    Maybe this just underscores how important corn is to the people of Nebraska. Why, if you can’t chew corn, what kind of Nebraskan can you possibly be?

    Apr 24, 2013 at 1:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   it's naptime

      That’s only important to those in eastern nebraska. The western half is much less into corn.

      Apr 24, 2013 at 2:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   tamiK

      Maybe has false teeth and can’t get corn on the cob off the cob ..
      No matter how I type that sentence it’s still awkward

      Apr 25, 2013 at 9:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Tom

      Maybe it was a dig that the fellow chews with his mouth open? Then she could see just how much or how little he chews his corn.

      Apr 25, 2013 at 2:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   Snowflame

      Actually, what bothers me about the chewing corn is that that’s the only one that’s an “if”. All the others are “I love you whens”. Sorta suggests to me that the aunt can currently chew corn, but the kid canvforsee this state of affairs coming to an end.

      I think the kid is planning on stealing the aunt’s teeth. But she’ll love her anyway.

      Apr 25, 2013 at 4:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Jami

      All I can think about when I read that line is that episode of Happy Days where Fonzie has a tooth ache but refuses to go to the dentist. At one point he cuts his corn off the cob then starts eating it a single kernel at a time using a tooth pick as a fork.

      Apr 26, 2013 at 9:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   L

      For a while when I lost all my front teeth, I couldn’t eat corn on a cob.

      Braces maybe?

      Apr 29, 2013 at 2:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Tesselara

    Reminds me of a song my mother used to sing to me: “I love you in the morning, and in the afternoon, I love you in the evening and underneath the moon, skidderarinkadink, skidderadinkadoo. I love you.”

    I’m actually massively impressed at her rhyming skills–which is rare in a six year old.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 2:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   kacie

      Wasn’t that a kids show in the eighties?

      Apr 24, 2013 at 8:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   H for Toy

      The Elephant Show. And holy cow, Tess. I didn’t notice it rhymed! Good call.

      Apr 24, 2013 at 9:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   Jessi

      @ Tess, did she do the arm movements?

      Apr 25, 2013 at 3:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   Raichu

      I think you left out a syllable? I think it’s skidamarinky not skidarinky

      Apr 25, 2013 at 12:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.5   Tesselara

      I am now amazed that my mother was that tuned into TV during the 80s that she could assimilate this song. I only remember her watching MASH, and the Bob Newhart Show. Don’t laugh. We lived in Vermont, (on a farm). This is all we had on TV.

      And Raichu…yes! Thank you!

      Apr 25, 2013 at 4:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.6   H for Toy

      It was on Nickelodeon, but the song isn’t exclusive to the show. I know quite a few people who knew the song before the show, so don’t worry. Your mom probably wasn’t watching kid’s TV while you were at school!

      Apr 25, 2013 at 8:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.7   Poltergeist

      I loved Sharon, Lois & Bram! Between them and Raffi, Canada spawned all of the best children’s entertainers.

      Apr 26, 2013 at 7:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Divawriter

    It’s nice to be so well-loved, even when you can’t chew corn.

    Apr 24, 2013 at 5:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Ace of Space

    My mother couldn’t chew corn either (dentures). However, she insisted upon only buying ears of corn, and prying the kernels loose from the cob with a fork. I asked her why didn’t she just buy frozen corn kernels.

    Her dumb looks should have warned me of the hell to come. Sometimes, I really don’t miss her at all.

    Apr 25, 2013 at 12:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Lara

      I’m sure she wrought no end of hell, and you have reason not to miss her, but I understand the corn thing. My mom and grandma did the same thing. And when I had a temporary crown, I did. The reason? Because fresh corn tastes better than frozen!

      Apr 29, 2013 at 11:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     

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