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A pre-emptive strike

May 2nd, 2013 · 44 comments

Eddy shares a house in Providence, Rhode Island with his sister. “We’re both busy with school and work,” Eddy says, “so we take turns cleaning the bathroom.” Well, sort of. “I usually put it off for weeks,” Eddy admits.

Dear Eddy, Thank you for taking the time out of your busy week to clean the bathroom. I have bought cleaning supplies for your endeavor. ? Carissa

Adds Eddy: “By the way, the heart translates loosely to ‘I’ll f’ing kill you.’”

related: The patron(izing) saint of roommates

FILED UNDER: bathroom · cleaning · family · Providence · thanks (but not really)

44 responses so far ↓

  • #1   James

    Now that’s passive-aggressive.

    May 2, 2013 at 4:37 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

  • #2   H for Toy

    That looks like a body wrapped in plastic behind the note. Clearly, Eddy was less than amused by his sister’s passive aggression.

    May 2, 2013 at 5:37 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   The Elf

      That’s the third sister, Laurie. She didn’t wash the dishes.

      May 2, 2013 at 6:55 am   rating: 39  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   H for Toy

      Eddy got pretty lucky with just a note, then. What is the PA sister’s name? My brain refuses to see anything other than “Carwal”.

      May 2, 2013 at 7:46 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   Christine

      I used to see “Carrie” but now I, too, see “Carwal” or possible “Carwae.”

      May 2, 2013 at 8:27 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   Beegood

      I just see: Car boobs e

      May 2, 2013 at 8:57 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   The Elf

      Of course you do, Bee!

      Given today’s naming trends, I’d bet money on Carwae. But I wouldn’t rule out Carboobse.

      May 2, 2013 at 10:09 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #2.6   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Kinda looks like Carissa to me…

      May 2, 2013 at 10:16 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #2.7   Carissa

      It’s Carissa. I should know, my name looks just like that in cursive.

      P.S. NOT the PA notewriter, for the record.

      May 2, 2013 at 11:41 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #2.8   Nunavut Guy

      I see caribou…of course I always see caribou.

      May 3, 2013 at 10:43 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #2.9   Raichu

      Yep, it’s Carissa.

      May 4, 2013 at 1:05 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #3   Biscuit

    If there’s one thing I loathe about share housing, it’s a flatmate that doesn’t do their share of the chores. You earned that note. Next time get off your ass and do your share of the work.

    May 2, 2013 at 5:39 am   rating: 69  small thumbs up

  • #4   Judith

    Team sister: considering he admits to not cleaning, and they’re siblings (meaning they’ve probably done way worse to each other), a sarcastic note is pretty tame.

    May 2, 2013 at 7:35 am   rating: 43  small thumbs up

  • #5   R

    It is annoying to be the only one in the house to do the cleaning. A passive-aggressive note is at least open communication and not a hidden ball of hate deep inside you.

    May 2, 2013 at 7:42 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Beatus Mongous

      I lost my lucky ball of hate, and now it’s four years gone…

      May 2, 2013 at 10:47 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   Snicklefritz

      Wait, hold on – I think I found your lucky ball of hate. It’s sitting out in my front yard. Let me don my full kevlar suit and I’ll bag it up for you.
      Just to confirm, your’s is the roiling ball of purple, pink and black. Cause there’s another one with a rather bilous shade of green as well. Claim it now, or I’m posting it on Craigslist.

      May 3, 2013 at 10:04 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   Beatus Mongous

      Neither of those are mine. Sorry. Mine is mostly black with metallic flecks of cobalt blue. Although, after four years, it may have changed a bit.

      May 3, 2013 at 10:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   spotmarkedx

      Is it five feet tall and sick of Beatus and all his rattling on?

      May 3, 2013 at 1:58 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   H for Toy

      That may be your lucky ball of hate, spotmarkedx. They can get confused sometimes.

      May 3, 2013 at 2:01 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #5.6   Raichu

      They’re siblings. She probably HAS tried talking to him about it. I don’t blame her.

      May 4, 2013 at 1:05 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #5.7   Gladystopia bang

      All you rotten kids better keep your little window-breaking, grass-killing balls of hate off my front lawn, or you’ll never see ‘em again. I’ve already got QUITE a collection.

      May 7, 2013 at 2:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #5.8   doodleysquat

      I f@cking hate people who don’t clean up the hidden balls of hate their pets leave on my lawn.

      May 13, 2013 at 5:38 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #6   NoAdditives

    If sisters can’t communicate by actually talking to each other, what hope does anyone else have? I hope I raise my kids to not only take care of their responsibilities in a timely manner, but to also be able to talk face to face.

    May 2, 2013 at 9:28 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   The Elf

      Hahahahaha! Yes, because communication always works better when it is attached to a long history of sibling rivalry, bitterness, and passive-aggressiveness.

      May 2, 2013 at 10:11 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   H for Toy

      Oh, sisters can, but since this is a brother/sister duo, there’s no real hope for them.

      May 2, 2013 at 3:19 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #6.3   Snicklefritz

      I try to stay on the good side of my siblings – only because one day I might need to rely on one of them for a kidney, or a bone marrow transplant……. Hey, you never know.

      May 3, 2013 at 12:23 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #6.4   Jami

      Eddie’s a brother, not a sister.

      I feel for the sister. I’ve recently started to refuse to clean Todd’s bathroom anymore. (We have three bathrooms total.) He has this bad habbit of not only using the same towel over and over again to dry with (and it stinks to high heaven after only one use) but he flicks it really hard after drying so pubic and other body hair goes flying everywhere. Even on the sink. And he doesn’t clean it up. Pink mold grows in the shower and he doesn’t clean it up. He has gotten so much fecal matter on the back of the toilet seat it actually managed to get embedded in there (we have those wooden seats because everyone except me hates the easy to clean kind) and HE WON’T CLEAN IT UP!

      I shouldn’t have to put on a freaking hazmat suit to clean the bathroom. So from now on he can clean up his own mess. He’s 45 years old, it’s time to stop being a slob.

      I really should write him a PA note and post it up here.

      May 3, 2013 at 1:23 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #6.5   H for Toy

      Pink mold? That can’t be healthy! Can’t wait to see the note!

      May 3, 2013 at 2:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #6.6   H for Toy

      If you decide to clean the bathroom again, I have it on good authority that you should use Sporicidin on the mold.

      May 3, 2013 at 9:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #6.7   Seanette

      I’m thinking a flamethrower might be the only answer for cleaning that bathroom. How can men fail to see filth?

      May 4, 2013 at 2:38 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #6.8   Beatus Mongous

      “How can people fail to see filth?”

      There. I fixed it for you.

      May 4, 2013 at 1:02 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #6.9   Raichu

      How do you know she didn’t try talking to him already?

      May 4, 2013 at 1:06 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #6.10   The Elf

      After reading many posts on the trials and tribulations of Jami’s siblings, I think “man” might just be stretching it a bit.

      May 5, 2013 at 12:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #6.11   The Elf

      Snicklefritz, that’s why I buy my niece and nephews Christmas gifts. I might need those healthy young organs one day.

      May 5, 2013 at 12:42 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #7   Jami

    Maybe the sister should try a gypsy fortune teller to put a spell on Eddie to do his share of the chores.

    May 2, 2013 at 11:32 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Ermengarde bang

      What kind of a “MULE” is it that goes to Gypsy fortune tellers regarding a 22-year-old man for purposes of household chores, and not to him personally??

      May 4, 2013 at 10:36 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

  • #8   Charlotte

    My video card is messed up, I can’t see the bottom half and I’m so curious!

    May 2, 2013 at 12:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Tard

      It’s a detailed photograph of the nicest rack I’ve seen in years, very sorry you can’t view it!

      May 2, 2013 at 12:59 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   H for Toy

      And now I will be singing “don’t I have a nice rack?” until I hear another song.

      May 2, 2013 at 3:18 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   Jami

      How about “Lydia The Tattooed Lady”? Groucho Marx’s version is, of course, the best.

      May 2, 2013 at 5:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #8.4   Ermengarde bang

      Good lord, that was exactly the kind of thing I needed to discover right now. Laughter is the, etc. Lydia, oh Lydia.

      May 4, 2013 at 10:40 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #9   Deejae

    There are a few notes on here that I think people deserve. The one where Michelle ate the bread, and now this one. There are likely others, but this makes me think Michelle has a soul mate in Eddie.

    But yeah, I have been in bot situations. I am either the only one who cleans up the apartment or my roommate wants hospital sterile.

    I had one roommate who asked if there was a way to train my cat to use the toilet or walk on a leash so she could go outside.

    May 3, 2013 at 10:46 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Lil'

      “Jinxy Cat, Jinxy Cat, where are you? I love you.”

      May 4, 2013 at 11:49 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #10   TC

    I fully expected this note to be signed at the bottom by “Double D”. (Because, Eddy…)

    May 3, 2013 at 3:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up


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