Dirty laundry for sale!

June 17th, 2013 · 63 comments

Laura spotted this yard sale sign outside Peet’s Coffee Shop in Portland, Oregon.

Ex-Wife Left Me, Come Get Her Stuff Before She Returns on Monday. HURRY!!

Peter spotted a similar sign in his Long Island neighborhood a while back.

Mom spent my trust fund. So I'm selling her stuff!

related: Garage sale drama

FILED UNDER: ex drama · garage sale · Long Island · Portland · revenge

63 responses so far ↓

  • #1   LI

    Is it really wise to advertise that you’re about to sell stolen goods/goods you likely have no legal right to sell? Probably not. I’d totally show up for the sales, though. With a lawn chair and pop corn.

    Jun 17, 2013 at 5:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Rene

      Definitely “hang around for a while” material.

      Jun 17, 2013 at 6:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   H for Toy

      So, “possession is 9/10ths” isn’t an actual law?

      Jun 18, 2013 at 5:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   kermit

      If the divorce didn’t go through on paper yet, technically the stuff that’s in their house belongs to both of them, assuming community property laws apply.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 7:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   The Elf

      Exactly, Kermit. As I’m sure the ex-husband will find out in court. Betcha the sign shows up in the case somehow…..

      Jun 18, 2013 at 8:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   mutzali

    I believe women do this kind of thing all the time. I go to a lot of garage sales, and sometimes I swear the old man’s out of town and she’s selling all his crap while he’s not looking!

    There are also a lot where “Grandma’s not even cold yet, but we need to clear out this house so we can get it on the market”.

    Jun 17, 2013 at 7:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   redheadwglasses

      Those must be the yard sales I’ve been to where men’s used underwear is being sold.

      Jun 17, 2013 at 10:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Lil'

      And isn’t it crazy that there’s always someone there willing to buy the underwear? I will never understand it.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 7:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   The Elf

      In the case of the Grandma, there’s issues of timing in there that may push a hasty garage sale (or estate sale). If a house sits unused, it deteriorates and it can attract crime. Plus there still may be debt linked to it that doesn’t go away upon death. Selling the house quickly, while the immediate family is still all in the area, isn’t a terrible idea. It’s hard to do while grieving, but sometimes that’s just what is necessary.

      And, besides, it’s pretty clear that it isn’t Grandma’s stuff anymore. If the inheritors have agreed on that plan, then at least it is their stuff to hastily sell.

      The impending divorce and the trust fund? Not so much!

      Jun 18, 2013 at 8:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   Beatus Mongous

      What sucks is when our wives sell our stuff, we men get upset, but we don’t do anything about it. We just go, “Dammit, why did you do that? Those were my favorite gym shorts!” And then we go buy new ones, which is what she wanted us to do in the first place.

      A woman, on the other hand, upon finding out her stuff was sold while she was out of town, will take legal action against her husband.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   kermit

      This is why you sell stuff gradually so that she won’t notice when it’s gone.

      As an example, my mom has occasional bouts of hoarding. She’ll buy a boat load of vitamins (or clothes or what have you) if there’s a really good sale on them. The thing is that she won’t use them. The last time I was home I threw out one shopping bag full of expired vitamins – most of which hadn’t even been opened at all. She didn’t even notice until I told her afterwards. Then of course she got mad because “they were still good!”

      Jun 18, 2013 at 1:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.6   Jami

      @Lil – Old underwear, especially the elastic in the waistband of men’s underwear, is perfect for tying up tomato plants to stakes. And the cloth can make decent rags for small jobs.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 12:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.7   Poltergeist

      I’m sure you could find something, anything, better than some stranger’s frayed briefs to restrain your vegetables and clean your windows.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.8   Jami

      The elastic is usually more gentle.

      I’m not saying I buy peoples’ used underwear. I use tomato cages. I’m just giving a reason why people would buy other’s used underwear.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.9   Lil'

      Jami, now that you say that, I do recall hearing that before. It makes sense to use elastic, but honestly I would go to a discount store and buy a cheap pack of new briefs before I would use anybody’s used underwear.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.10   kermit

      I think Jami may have been to Japan. Rumor has it that there’s places with vending machines that sell used underwear for perverts to buy.

      I’ve never been there so I have no idea if this is true or not. But as Etsy and Regretsy have taught us, some people will try to sell anything and everything.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 9:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.11   Jami

      Kermit – Nope. Just a gardener. But I’ve heard that too. My understanding is it’s used school girl undies, not grown men’s ratty boxer briefs.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 1:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.12   The Elf

      But I need the some roomy and stretched-out men’s undies for my fruits! It’s been proven, time and time again, that panties are not enough to properly restrain a couple of avocados and a banana.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.13   Holly

      The vending machines got outlawed, because they couldn’t prove the underwear was used. As far as I know they still have shops that sell them, as bizarre as that is.

      Jun 22, 2013 at 8:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   Iwill FindU

    I think the second one needs to be sent to white whine.

    Jun 17, 2013 at 9:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Kris

      Actually if Mom did not use the trust fund to the benefit of the kid who the trust was for, she could be taken to court. Using the fund not meant for her to pay for vacas, plastic surgery, a new wardrobe etc don’t count.

      Jun 20, 2013 at 10:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Sorcha

      Because only white people can have trust funds?

      Jun 26, 2013 at 9:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   Madrias

    Second one: clean your laser printer’s drum!

    As to both of ‘em, not entirely sure of the legality of either. Would be fun to show up in a nice patchwork Crown Victoria (those of you in the US will get the hint) and see how many bug out.

    Jun 17, 2013 at 10:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   kathlynn

    I’d totally do this if my mother had anything worth selling (she spent my Registered Education Savings Plan (RESP) on a 3rd vehicle (which didn’t last long) and a wood working tool she’s used 2x). then claimed she spent $500 on clothes for me (she hadn’t done so in years. I was the one who bought everything I needed for work and school that year)

    Jun 18, 2013 at 2:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Lil'

      I really hate when people do this kind of crap to their kids. Maybe one day you can pay her back by putting her in a crappy nursing home. Or you can just fantasize about it. Either way…

      Jun 18, 2013 at 8:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   Raichu

      I do not understand why people do things like that. =(

      Jun 18, 2013 at 9:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   KHandcock

      Whoa, how did she get her hands on your RESP? I thought one of the big advantages to that was that the money becomes the student’s — that the parents can only reclaim it if the kid doesn’t opt to take post-secondary education in a certain period of time.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   redheadwglasses

      My college boyfriend went home after the end of one school year to find that his parents had sold his car out from under him (they had not contributed any money toward its purchase or upkeep).

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   pooham

      kathlynn, I like the use of all the parentheses. It reminds me of math problems. :)

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.6   Beatus Mongous

      My mom used to put my lunch money in the video poker machines. When I finally called her out on it in the middle of K-Mart, she stopped.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.7   kermit

      KH – There is no law that says the money belongs to anybody but the account holder. A RESP is no different than an RRSP.

      The account holder can take out money before the expected time if they pay a penalty. Or they can take out the money at the expected time and use it for whatever they want. The thing is that you can’t open an RESP if you don’t have a kid.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 1:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.8   Wench

      Hmmm, there is another way of looking at this – perhaps the 2nd note writer has been acting like a total douche? Entitled, spoiled, lazy, etc? Maybe there’s some financial crisis so mom has no choice? I’m aware I’m leaping to some huge assumptions here; I’m just pointing out we are only getting one side of the story.

      Just sayin’……..

      p.s. if mommy dearest has just blown the $ ‘cos she can, then agreed, she’s a total douche……

      Jun 18, 2013 at 4:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.9   Jami

      @Raichu With two of my brothers who did that to their kids with money my mom had been putting into a college account for her grandkids they spent the money on drugs. She closed those accounts and reopened them without my brothers’ names on them. (Originally their names were on the accounts so they could contribute too.)

      Jun 19, 2013 at 12:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   The Elf

    I eagerly await the PAN detailing the lawsuit.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 8:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   Raichu

    Holy shit, what a bitter asshole.

    As for the second one…maybe not the best way to handle it, but that sucks…why do people do things like that?

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   Nope

    On the second sign you know it’s serious because they use Comic Sans and because the plastic sleeve is upside down. Pure genius right there.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   nativefloridian

      It’s not upside down, not for this purpose. ‘Right side up’ would just catch rainwater and defeat its whole purpose of repelling water.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   Grimsdale

    I’m surprised about the excessive sense of entitlement in the second image, and the fact nobody has yet commented on it! Why would you beleive your parents have to give you money?

    Jun 18, 2013 at 11:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Lythande

      Because if money is set in a trust for the child, it belongs to the child, and the parent/executor of the trust is not actually supposed to spend it except on the child (although I’m pretty sure it’s not illegal, it’s just a dick move, to do so).

      I read your comment as thinking it’s the child complaining about the money the parent should have given them in trust but I read it as a trust that was left by a grandparent or something and the parents were just supposed to be guardians of the money until the kid came of age.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.2   Barbary Lion

      Er, yeah–do you not understand what a trust fund is? It’s the kid’s money, not the parent’s. Stealing from your own child is the lowest of the low.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.3   redheadwglasses

      No, it IS illegal to spend a child’s trust fund money on something that doesn’t benefit the child.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.4   Grimsdale

      clearly not – must be a transatlantic mistranslation.
      To me a trust fund is a method of circumventing inheritance tax by gradually shifting money to your kids before you’re dead. To need to do so would make you fairly rich anyway.
      Lythande – I can see your point if the money is left from a grandparent who has since died, and yes it’s definitely a dick move! There must be cultural differences though, if advertising that you had been left a large amount of money is not seen as crass.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.5   redheadwglasses

      “Clearly not”? That makes no sense. Parents have access to their children’s trust funds, and can spend it all on ponies and hand grenades, and unless someone brings it to the attention of the court, no prosecution or investigation takes place. That parents get away with this doesn’t mean it’s legal.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.6   redheadwglasses

      The first sign made me think of the guy who put his exwife’s wedding dress on and sold it on ebay.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.7   Beatus Mongous

      I had a pretty serious accident when I was 16, and received a decent college trust from the person who was at fault. 5 years later, my parents spent that trust on a business investment, which turned out quite well for all of us, so I didn’t mind.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 12:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.8   H for Toy

      I remember that guy, redhead! Actually pretty hilarious.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 1:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.9   Lil'

      My favorite wedding dress ex is the guy who wrote the book called something like “101 Uses for My Ex-Wife’s Wedding Dress”. He made some money that way, and it’s pretty funny. A couple of my personal favorites are the oil pan and the sun visor.

      On a side note, with H and red in one thread, I couldn’t resist telling you…I’m having twins!

      Jun 18, 2013 at 2:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.10   Grimsdale

      redheadwglasses: i was replying to post 9.2, not yours, which appeared whilst i was typing.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 2:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.11   H for Toy

      Oh my goodness, Lil!! How exciting! I wanted twins when I was pregnant with my older daughter. Keep us updated. Hope you’re feeling better.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 8:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.12   Raichu

      Too bad there’s no proper comment nesting here beyond the first level.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 6:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.13   Lil'

      Thanks, H! I feel much better. The morning sickness is gone, and I’m just trying to process the fact that I will have two babies – double EVERYTHING. I’m thrilled and terrified at the same time. Fortunately, my best friend has one-year-old twins, so I’m all set on cribs and car seats. There’s a little peace of mind.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.14   The Elf

      Congrats Lil!

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.15   Lil'

      Thanks, Elf!

      Jun 19, 2013 at 3:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Jodie

    No blur on the addresses?

    Jun 18, 2013 at 12:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Lil'

      They’re posted on the street by the residents for public viewing, so I don’t really think it’s necessary to blur them out now.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 1:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   Nicki

    I’m so lucky my parents aren’t losers who spend even a dime of the money I earn. That said, if they need something from the store I’m at, I pick it up if I can.

    But using a child’s trust for yourself is like spending child support you receive on anything other than the child in question: Illegal, immoral, and you should be hanged if you do it.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Iwill FindU

      Man I need you to convince my cousin of that, he’s paying his ex child-support and she doesn’t even have their daughter (thank you CFS) so I very much doubt his daughter sees a penny of the money he gives miss. crazy every month. He’s just to nice.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 1:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   tylerzmum

    Why any child feels they are entitled to a trust fund is beyond me…sure it’d be nice if your parents put away some money to help give you a head start in life, but the parents are the ones putting money into it in the first place, so if they then decide that money should go elsewhere (say, if said child started acting like an entitled douche) shouldn’t that be their prerogative?

    Maybe it’s the cynical side of me, or maybe it’s because I actually had to work for anything I wanted in life, including paying for my own college? I always figured a trust fund was just a nice bonus for kids whose parents could afford to give them a head start in life :/

    Jun 19, 2013 at 12:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Raichu

      First of all, sometimes trust funds come from someone other than the parent (i.e. a grandparent).

      Secondly, even if the parent did start the trust fund, it’s a dickish thing to do to say “here’s a bunch of money I’m giving you for your future!” and then decide later to take it all away. If the parent isn’t interested in giving their kids money, they shouldn’t first put on a big show like that’s what they’re actually going to be doing.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 6:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   warns

    Legal or not, if you’re leaving, and you’re on bad terms with your spouse, don’t leave things you care about behind.

    Would it be easier to rent a storage unit off the bat and avoid all confrontation, or would it be easier to have to involve the law cause you were untrue and stupid enough to leave your possessions with your scorned partner? Common sense, yeah!

    Jun 19, 2013 at 3:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   thebigboot

      Except when a woman does it, it’s applauded and she gets accolades for standing up to her man.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 10:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.2   nurgleth

      By whom exactly, thebigboot? Her friends and probably family? That’s shocking…

      Jun 20, 2013 at 4:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   Littlest Hobo

    Both of these are just RIPE for Judge Judy’s infinite wisdom, legal knowledge and endless ranting and raving! Woohoo!

    Jun 23, 2013 at 6:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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