No problem — ’twas a piece of a cake!

June 18th, 2013 · 91 comments

“Our organization recently moved most of its employees from several small offices into one large office,” writes our submitter in Vancouver. “It only took five months for the kitchen conflict to ramp up into a full-blown note war.”

thank you for helping yourself to half of my birthday cake....I guess I didn't need the whole cake to share with my friends and coworkers anyways. ...and happy birthday to you too!

To the leaver of the cake: You're very welcome.

...and someone helped themselves to one of my steam buns (leftovers) in a takeout box but I have a bad cold so they'll get the bad karma back.

related: Let the rest of us eat cake.

FILED UNDER: birthday · cake · karma's a bitch · note wars · office fridge · stealing · thanks (but not really) · Vancouver


91 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Rain

    I don’t understand why this person is mad that their coworkers ate the cake meant for sharing with their coworkers. How else does sharing work?

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:32 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Nicki

      The person wanted to PERSONALLY give people a piece of cake. How hard of a concept is that, hmm?

      If it’s not yours, you ask before you eat/touch/use it. If you don’t ask, the answer will always be NO!

      Jun 18, 2013 at 9:34 pm   rating: 112  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   herpderp

      It’s a large office. It sounds like they wanted the cake for their group, not for the whole company.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 9:34 pm   rating: 67  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Nicki

      Herpderp, at least you understand basic courtesy. It seems Rain didn’t get the memo.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 9:45 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   von art

      It seems Nicki has sand in her vagina.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:04 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   Nicki

      I’d be a little cheerier if I hadn’t had a life-threatening allergic reaction today.

      Sorry I’m so grumpy, von art, should I slather myself in rainbows for you? Go to hell.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:07 pm   rating: 77  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   Rain

      Every office kitchen I’ve ever been in, if you leave a cake or other baked good lying out, it’s meant to be shared with everyone. I’ve never heard of personally handing out slices of cake to your favorite coworkers and ignoring everyone else. Only a jerk would do that.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:13 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   Brian H

      Just goes to show there are people who weren’t beat enough as a child so they don’t understand what thievery is.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:34 pm   rating: 36  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.8   Joy

      I work in a large corporation, we have a large building with 8 or 9 departments and then individual teams within those departments. When I had my birthday I shared my cake with my current team (14 people) and a few other people. We went into a conference room to eat the cake. Prior to eating the cake it was stored in one of the lesser used office refrigerators. It is standard practice at least where I work.

      That was more likely what the person wanted to do. Cake for 50+ people can get unwieldy.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:37 pm   rating: 71  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.9   Raichu

      In the fridge =/= “lying out”. Food in a public fridge does not automatically become public food unless it is labeled as such. I would never eat food in a public place if it wasn’t made clear to me that I was welcome to have some.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 5:57 am   rating: 76  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.10   The Elf

      Raichu hit on it exactly. Cut cake on countertop/table, obviously leftover? Fair game. Cake in the fridge, especially uncut? DO NOT TOUCH.

      This was cake in the fridge, implied uncut. (May not have been, the note isn’t entirely clear on the matter.) Bottom notewriter violated the unwritten rule of the breakroom (twice, since notewriter implied they stole someone’s milk too) and then topped himself by writing a douche-y response.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:56 am   rating: 54  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.11   Lili

      Who eats someone else’s birthday cake? First you sing happy birthday, then you cut the cake, then you eat. Anyone who thinks otherwise must have been raised in a cave.

      I’m officially informing you “I get to eat whatever I want from the fridge” believers, on behalf of the entire freaking civilized world: You may not cut into someone else’s new birthday cake. If you don’t sing happy birthday, if you don’t participate in the celebrations, you don’t get cake. Taking cake that you weren’t invited to share is called stealing. Just like eating someone else’s leftovers or lunch is stealing.

      Are you tempted to think, “I want cake, cake is there, therefore it must be justifiable for me to take it.”

      NO! No! “I want” is not a reason for anything. You ALWAYS have to include, “and I earned it” or “and it was given to me” and “and it is morally permissible for me to do this, by which I mean, it does not hurt anybody.”

      Every. Single. Time. Every. Single. Action. It’s really not that hard, nor does it require much effort, unless you are used to living entirely for yourself as the center of the universe.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:13 pm   rating: 52  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.12   Poltergeist

      Having sand in your vagina is actually a positive thing. It means you spent time lounging on the beaches of Europe rather than sitting at your computer in a dim basement typing up some half-assed misogynistic response to an anonymous person on the internet.

      I wish I had sand up in my crotch right now.

      Jun 20, 2013 at 11:48 pm   rating: 45  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.13   TammyD

      What type of ill-mannered chav steals someone’s birthday cake? It wasn’t sitting out on the counter, cut up in pieces, which would imply it was for all to enjoy. Some people weren’t taught proper manners, obviously.

      I can’t, for the life of me, comprehend how someone could go into an office fridge and think they’re allowed to help themselves to anything they find. Someone brought in their own food (ie: their property) and intended to eat it. It was not purchased for everyone to enjoy, unless there’s a damn sign on it implying otherwise. Would you go through their purse and steal money from them, too?

      If you take food that doesn’t belong to you, you’re a thief. Plain and simple.

      Jun 22, 2013 at 7:55 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.14   danny b

      I used to bring stuff in to work for anyone/everyone, but there was one guy that would take 1/2 of it for himself right away so I stopped. He’s probably why the other people that did stopped too.

      Jun 30, 2013 at 12:31 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Nicki

    Y’know, I’d actually be pissed too. But I’d send a memo to the boss, find out who it was and break some necks in the parking lot.

    No one fucks with MY birthday cake. >:(

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:32 pm   rating: 51  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Lee

      And why would they? You sound like such a delight!

      Jun 18, 2013 at 9:53 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Nicki

      I actually am. However, I’m highly allergic to many foods that the break room has in spades.

      Like, literally. Wheat makes my throat close up. And people who happen by to see things from the gluten-free egg-free nut-free lactose-free boulangerie close to my house know that if they touch my food, I’ll put ipecac in their coffee.

      People need to respect food. And you need to understand *why* people like me can’t have normal food and need other mouthbreathing coworkers to understand that.

      Seriously, my boulangerie charges $30 for a single round cake. How many times should I expect to have this work expense at other people’s enjoyment? Should I apply to write it off on my taxes, or simply lock the refrigerator door?

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:04 pm   rating: 65  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   von art

      No, but seriously. You could build sandcastles up in there. GTFO.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:06 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   NoAdditives

      I don’t have allergy issues, but people better not eat my cake or whatever food I may have. Granted, I’m pregnant right now and tend to cry over food. But even so, cake is sacred. Don’t steal it from other people. That’s beyond rude.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:13 pm   rating: 71  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Nicki

      Good luck on your pregnancy! :D Do you know what you’re having? (Gender-wise, I mean. If you’re somehow pregnant with a blue whale, I’m so very very sorry and I hope you recover soon. *Hugs*)

      But yes, you’re right. Von art, however, may be one of the filchers of food that doesn’t belong to him/her, which might explain why they’re offended. (If I were a food thief, I too would be upset at being called out.)

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:16 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   NoAdditives

      Thank you! This is my fourth, so I’m well versed in the ridiculousness of hormone fluctuation and probably haven’t cried mahout food this time. As far as the gender goes, I’m not sure. The ultrasound said girl, but my symptoms and intuition say boy. Both my girl pregnancies were exactly the same and my boy was very different. This one is just like it was with my son, so I can’t get myself to trust the ultrasound. Thankfully (?) this baby is apparently quite enormous, so I’m getting an ultrasound to check the growth and size, and we’ll get another peek at those private parts. I think I’m ready to trust whatever this one says, but I have a feeling that I won’t believe it’s a girl (if that’s what this ultrasound confirms) until the baby is born.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:28 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.7   Nicki

      Awww. :D You are truly blessed to be a mommy. (I would, myself, if not for the alarming fact that many prenatal vitamins have ingredients I’m allergic to. And I wouldn’t be so sure if the baby wouldn’t have them either.) When my sister had her third baby, she ended up with pre- and post-partum allergic reactions to almost everything, including cucumbers, of all things. I couldn’t risk having *more* allergies.

      My mom had 3 girls, and my baby sister had 3 girls. We have no boys in this family, but my mother was pregnant with one once. Military life makes pregnancies hard, sadly :(

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:34 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.8   Madrias

      I, too, despise food thieves. However, my food’s usually instant karma. I like things spicy. I make my own pizza, and I blend a particular secret ingredient in with my sauce: Habanero peppers.

      Let’s just say the last person to steal my pizza slices ended up with what sounded an awful lot like a volcano erupting into the toilet the next day…

      And yes, I will eat my own food when it’s that spicy. I don’t do it as a booby trap. Eat at your own risk, cause I don’t have to label my ingredients for my own meal.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:54 pm   rating: 44  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.9   NoAdditives

      Aww, thanks! I love my kiddos and think they’re pretty awesome.

      I can totally respect your reasons for not having kids. I’m super paranoid about all kinds of things and there are so many things that could have happened that would have made me decide either not to have kids at all or to not have more. I’m so thankful that things worked out the way they did, that my kids are healthy and happy, and that I just got so lucky.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 11:36 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.10   jen

      von art, thank you for reminding women they aren’t allowed to use a female name AND have opinions on the internet. some of us just lose our precious little heads sometimes. you, sir, of course, are free to continue to be a right asshole.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 6:13 am   rating: 153  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.11   The Elf

      I’d thumb that a dozen times, Jen.

      Congrats NoAdditives!

      Madrias, I like the way you think.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:49 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.12   H for Toy

      Congratulations, No Additives! Nicki, my allergies (seasonal) changed with each child. I had mild allergies before children, and I went back and forth between none and worse than ever, with each pregnancy. The right number of kids may rid you of allergies forever! There’s no guarantee, though, so I don’t blame you for not risking it.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 9:14 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.13   BrookeDiz bang

      When did PA notes become a damn support forum?

      Jun 19, 2013 at 3:44 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.14   Raichu

      Is there a rule about not going off-topic? What’s wrong with a friendly conversation that comes up?

      Jun 20, 2013 at 9:36 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   JK

    If ever there was a time to order a ginormous cake shaped like a giraffe, it would be now.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:49 pm   rating: 62  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   dcg

    If anything, the larger of the three notes illustrates perfectly what douchebags the people of Vancouver really are – i.e., the kind who will eat all your cake and leave you an anonymous “fuck you” note.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 9:55 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   NoAdditives

      I think the larger note was from the person whose milk was stolen and was left in a sarcastic manner since they are also angry about having food stolen.

      Jun 18, 2013 at 10:14 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Brian H

    I’m telling you one day we are going to read about how someone dosed some of their food with a potent poison to punish the thieves in their office.

    Jun 18, 2013 at 11:36 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Iwill FindU

      Isn’t there a note somewhere on here about someone doing pretty much that. Only instead of poison they used pot-brownies (low grade) and they then complained to HR about the rampant drug use in the office?

      Jun 19, 2013 at 1:11 am   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Brian H: Actually, it’s already happened… though it was more out of ignorance than out of intent to seriously harm anyone.

      Unfortunately, the would-be detective used a full 50 tablets of laxative to spike two sodas, which the food thief spotted since they didn’t fully dissolve… and for some reason I can’t fathom, he moved them to the front of the store where an less-observant customer bought and partially consumed one before noticing the remainder of the tablets. The customer wound up in the hospital, and both employees were arrested.

      (If you’re still curious, Google “Barbara J Nelson laxative Family Dollar”.)

      Jun 19, 2013 at 12:58 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Nola

    Who could possibly cut the first slice out of the birthday cake? It is normal to get angry over this.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 2:28 am   rating: 33  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Trish Smith

    Nothing shows just how mature you are than throwing a fit over birthday cake. And to think I thought it was just 5-year olds who did that sort of thing…

    Jun 19, 2013 at 3:49 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Raichu

      Translation: I’ll steal your food if I want; don’t complain about it because that makes you the bad guy.

      Seriously? Give me a break.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 6:01 am   rating: 115  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   TammyD

      Condoning the stealing of someone’s birthday cake shows that you have zero manners, just like the cake thief. I’m so glad I don’t share an office fridge with you!

      The person who steals from another is the one showing a huge amount of immaturity, as well as an undeserved sense of entitlement. What a selfish attitude to have. I pity them.

      Jun 22, 2013 at 8:02 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   danny b

      Raichu is right. When someone was stealing my yogurt, likely the same person that takes 1/2 of desert items, he was saying that I was being a whinny bitch. One time when a vendor bought us ALL pizza, he hid a couple for himself.

      Jun 30, 2013 at 12:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   greg house md

    The immature thing is taking something that doesn’t belong to you.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 5:05 am   rating: 67  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   The Elf

      Yes, but those PANs are pretty special, too. I’m guessing maturity was not part of the hiring criteria.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   H for Toy

      I wonder if the response was actually left by the cake thief, or just some smart-ass who thought he was funny, bringing a half gallon of milk into the mix.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:54 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   The Elf

      That does add an interesting twist to the mix. Maybe Canadians are a little more subtle and dry in their humor, eh?

      Jun 19, 2013 at 8:04 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   H for Toy

      I also wonder if it was milk in a bag?

      Jun 19, 2013 at 9:15 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   The Elf

      Ah, milk in the bag. Just like mommy used to make.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:36 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   TammyD

      I’m confused by this “milk in a bag” thing…

      I’m not Canadian, but have lived in Canada for a few years, and haven’t come across milk in a bag, although people outside of Canada frequently bring it up.

      Is this something that used to be common here?

      Jun 22, 2013 at 8:05 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.7   H for Toy

      Maybe it isn’t anymore. I haven’t been up there in quite a long time, but my aunts/uncles/cousins always got their milk in a bag. Then again, here in the US, my grandmother used to get her milk from a vending machine at the end of the block. Milk has changed a lot in the last 20 years.

      Jun 22, 2013 at 5:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.8   Little Nikke

      Milk in a bag is regional: You see in in southern Ontario and in the East, but I never saw it while I was growing up in Manitoba (that’s the province in the middle, for you Americans)

      Jun 24, 2013 at 5:27 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Sam

    If it was an already half-eaten cake, I could understand… (though it’s still rude) but who takes an uncut cake out of the office fridge and helps themselves to it? Raised by wolves!

    Jun 19, 2013 at 5:47 am   rating: 36  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   KittenPlaysTheViolin

      Thanks, I was raised by wolves. We’re no different from the rest of you.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 1:38 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Lili

      Apparently you are different from us*, since you don’t respect people’s property (I know it seems odd, but who’d have thought we had to explain the legality and morality of stealing cake).

      *I get it, you weren’t really raised by wolves, this is just a funny comment and I’m responding to it in that tone.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 2:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   RCat

      Of course you’re different! You were raised by wolves! That’s an entirely different living experience than what most children have been through, and encourages a very different set of morals than most “human raised by one or more humans” families in our civilized societies encourage! Unless you were raised by rich wolves, but then you’d still be different since not many children are raised by rich people.

      Jun 21, 2013 at 9:59 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   The Elf

    Again, I must advocate opting out of the No Man’s Land of the Office (the communal fridge). Insulated bags, kept at the desk, rock. You can get little containers for things like coffee creamer or dressing, too. There’s nothing that goes in the fridge that can’t be brought in via insulated bag.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 7:40 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Turbo

      How about a sheet cake?

      Jun 19, 2013 at 7:59 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   The Elf

      Get a big enough cooler/bag……

      A sheet cake does not need to be refrigerated unless you have a special frosting.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 8:48 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Turbo

      Still hard to keep a sheet cake at your desk.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 11:04 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   redheadwglasses

      It’s easy keeping a sheet cake at your desk. THe annoying/difficult part of it is dealing with all the comments and questions about the cake.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 11:09 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   The Elf

      Depends on your desk!

      Jun 19, 2013 at 11:13 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   H for Toy

    I’m surprised there was no “we didn’t want you to gain weight by eating the whole cake, so we stole half” response.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 7:53 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   e

    Yeah, it’s obviously “karma” and not basic biology if you catch a cold from germy food. I hate those people who think there’s a special karma fairy who goes around settling their personal scores.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 8:54 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   H for Toy

      Think what you want, but I pay good money for my karma fairy.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 9:17 am   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Tard

    Folks stopped fridge surfing after the ‘Ex-Lax brownies and Cream Cheese & Pencil Shavings’ episode. Oh yeah, washing it down with the Murine Lemonaid (which gives the drinker diarrhea) really clinched it.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 9:18 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Tom

    I just can’t fathom the lower white note in this scenario. Are they trolling? Do they think that shit is actually funny? “Ha ha I stole your cake, here’s some funny pointers on how to make food more delicious for thieves! I’m a riot!” Are they pretending to be the thief? I just don’t get it. Either way, it’s not professional in the slightest.

    Seriously, if I was the boss and I found out who wrote that bottom note I would sit them down and ask them what they think is so damned funny. Then I would think long and hard about that pink slip.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 10:10 am   rating: 28  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Wait..what?

      Tom you sound sugar deprived. Go rummage through your office fridge and snag a piece of yummy cake.

      And since no one has yet said it…

      That cake was fucking delicious.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 10:53 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Jan

      Giraffes are fucking delicious :)

      Jun 20, 2013 at 1:38 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   RCat

      I don’t know who this delicious person is, but after reading some of the comments on this site, it appears as though s/he gets a lot of sex.

      Jun 21, 2013 at 10:02 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.4   The Elf

      Thank goodness I don’t live in the apartment below Delicious.

      Jun 21, 2013 at 11:17 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.5   motorama

      yes, I would certainly get rid of any employee that left an unfunny response in this situation, it would be worth the severence

      Jun 21, 2013 at 11:56 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.6   Who passed out the Haterade?

      I’m just glad to hear Delicious is still alive… I was beginning to think they had passed away of old age. (Or possibly found a less savory way to go.)

      Jun 21, 2013 at 2:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Luckyhermit bang

    I think the snarky response note was funny, and was most likely not by the cake thief.

    If somebody leaves a whiny note, then it’s only fair to leave one making fun of them.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 11:37 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Will

    I think I’m on team “sack everybody and start over.” That office is too dysfunctional to succeed.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   Bubba

    They need one of these: http://amzn.to/18adVqx
    If it wasn’t for people who didn’t secure their food there wouldn’t be any thievery in this kitchen, would there?

    Jun 19, 2013 at 12:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   Rachel

    But… I *LOVE* giraffes!! :(

    Jun 19, 2013 at 3:12 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Lil'

      Me too. They aren’t creepy. The note writer was just being a prick. Ignore the hate, giraffes! Stand tall and keep your heads up.

      Jun 19, 2013 at 3:27 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   warns

    Guess what, here’s a grown up rule. Never ever ever take food that hasn’t been offered to you. Here’s another one, people who steal things aren’t grown ups, and leaving them a note is going to make them act immature, even more.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 3:53 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   motorama

      “grown up rule” – pshaw how utterly and completely boring

      Jun 21, 2013 at 11:54 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   Snowflame

      Never ever take food that hasn’t been offered to you? I feel that if you loved alone, that rule would lead to you starving to death…

      Jun 21, 2013 at 5:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   H for Toy

      Snowflame, loving alone… You’re doing it wrong.

      Jun 23, 2013 at 9:42 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   justme

    The note writer probably isn’t the thief and probably doesn’t actually hate giraffes. He/she was just trying to be funny, and (since I laughed out loud at the note) succeeded to at least some extent.

    While I’m sure the birthday celebrant did not enjoy the humor at all, I see no reason why those of us who did not have our cake stolen can’t appreciate it.

    *No, I have never stolen anything from a communal fridge. Humorous responses to useless PA notes just make me laugh.

    Jun 19, 2013 at 4:19 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Pkay

    Now here comes into play my newest invention of the combination lock containers to be sold to offices worldwide. Beware of the employee that comes to work with bolt cutters.

    Jun 20, 2013 at 4:42 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   DS

    A wacky joke describing an animal using a superlative? Classic! I wonder what kind of hilarious, free-spirited manic pixie dream girl came up with that gem.

    Jun 20, 2013 at 12:50 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   KH

    Is it weird that I am the most offended by the giraffe comment. lol. They are NOT creepy.

    Jun 21, 2013 at 4:00 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   Poltergeist

      Except for when they use their giant sausage tongues to lick inside their noses. That *is* kinda creepy.

      Jun 21, 2013 at 6:10 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   The Elf

      Oh, you’re just jealous.

      Jun 24, 2013 at 7:12 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Paula K

    We had a thief in the building. He stole my sammiches. I made a cat food sammich. Some of the fancy sort, mixed in with mayo & relish, garnished with a lettuce leaf, on a fancy bun. F*cker never took it.

    Jun 21, 2013 at 8:46 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   RCat

    Way to go, cake thief. Now the cake is a lie.

    Jun 21, 2013 at 10:00 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   motorama

    I say kudos to the cake thief, grab the world by the cajones, it’s better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission, and if you’re creative enough to leave a hilarious note then all the power to you, it would have been another forgettable, boring birthday cake handout session without the theft, the thief made it memorable. Way better.

    Jun 21, 2013 at 11:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Poltergeist

      Would it be okay if the birthday boy/girl stabbed the perpetrator with the cake knife? That would have also made the event more memorable.

      Jun 21, 2013 at 6:09 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   Phoenix

    My roommates did this to me with my birthday cake. They had a mutual friend over on a saturday (not a friend of mine) and my party was on Sunday, so I had already gotten the cake. They helped themselves to the cake, on the justification of “but (our friend) won’t be here tomorrow to have any!”

    No, and he wasn’t invited to the party either. And I’ve never met him. And you ate over half the cake!

    Jun 23, 2013 at 5:03 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     

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