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Actually, we have a garden for that

July 22nd, 2013 · 54 comments

Rachel in the U.K. found this note pushed through the letterbox this morning. “This the first note either I or my boyfriend have had regarding any kind of ‘leek,’” she says. “I just checked both the bathroom and the kitchen for anything watery where it shouldn’t be and there’s nothing, so I’m very confused. I’m not sure what she wants us to sort, either. Exciting stuff!”

This is the second time Ive had to wright to you. and I'm slowly getting annoyed. You seem to have a leek in your bathroom that is slowly ruining my newly decorated bathroom. I now have bubbles and cracks in my ceiling which will now need repainting! If you don't get it sorted I will and the bill will be fixed to your address! No. 26

related: Drippy faucets

FILED UNDER: bathroom · neighbors · spelling and grammar police · U.K.

54 responses so far ↓

  • #1   weed store

    dude what if the leak is in ur pipes dude

    Jul 22, 2013 at 1:48 pm   rating: 29  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   KittenPlaysTheViolin

      Just when i thought the last submission was as bad as it gets when it comes to the slaughtering of the English language, this one comes along and totally blows it away. And surprise, surprise… This one’s from the UK as well. :-P

      Jul 23, 2013 at 1:13 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   Major Tom

      Wat r u saying Kitten? Ill av u no We av very Hi standerds of litteracy in the UK.

      Jul 24, 2013 at 4:45 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

  • #2   chiieddy

    If it’s in their pipes and this is a condo, they’re not responsible, the condo association generally would be. They would be responsible to the studs and not for pipes between units. However, it can’t hurt to reseal the bathtub with a quick run of silicone to prevent leaks

    Jul 22, 2013 at 2:21 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

  • #3   R.May

    Um, submitter…perhaps you should go pay this lady a visit. Pipes run through walls and floors and ceilings – you very well could be leaking water into the bathroom of the person below and have no visible sign in your place.

    And, ya know, if this is the person below you and there does appear to be water damage, you should consider hiring a plumber.

    Not sure that the UK has much in the way of condo associations….

    Jul 22, 2013 at 2:21 pm   rating: 41  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Alex

      Exactly what I was going to say. If a leak exists, it is probably in the pipes between the writer’s ceiling and the submitter’s floor. There might be no evidence of it from above.

      Although if the writer thinks s/he is going to get a plumber to do the work and then send a bill to a third party who has not agreed to pay, s/he is bonkers.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 2:33 pm   rating: 46  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   thrall

      Rachel, it sounds like you live in No. 36 (or some other suitably upstairs number). The “wright” thing would be to involve building management and your neighbor ASAP to resolve an issue which undoubtedly is causing mold as well as damage.

      And if I were in No. 26, I would not have scrimped on a one-third sheet of paper to get your attention. Delivering a “leek” would be the least I could do–soon it will be fungi.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 2:41 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #3.3   H for Toy bang

      Alex, that’s the “wrighter’s” floor.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 9:19 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #3.4   FeRD bang

      “wrighter’s” ceiling, actually. “subbemytteur’s” floor.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 11:22 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #3.5   H for Toy bang

      You’re write. Sometimes I get my wrights and lefts confused.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 11:41 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #3.6   Dalamara

      That would be your* write.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 11:59 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #3.7   The Elf

      Your both rong about being write.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 6:49 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #3.8   Ethel

      Sometimes leaks come in from roofs and from outside things like vents for bathrooms and clothes dryers as well. And, while may seem crazy, water will travel along structural boards and supports before the home dwellers ever see the water. Never ever assume it is from the bathroom upstairs, there may be worse things architecturally going on.

      Unless you are below Lenny Kravitz, then it safe to assume it is an overflowing toilet.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 8:37 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #3.9   L

      OH I have a story. My aunt’s house, there was a leak in her attic. Water was going into a vent, going down said vent, and coming out of my cousin’s bedroom’s light fixture.

      So. Buildings are weird.

      Jul 26, 2013 at 3:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #4   justme

    They checked for leaks, but did they check for leeks? Clearly, the NW is referring to plants growing through the floor and damaging the downstairs neighbor’s ceiling.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 2:21 pm   rating: 49  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   weed store

      lol i get it because its a miseplling and lol wait, thats exactly what the headline said

      Jul 22, 2013 at 3:11 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   H for Toy

      And those onions smell up the bathroom something awful! No amount of flushing gets rid of that stench.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 3:53 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   Poltergeist

      Just spray a shitload of flowery scented air freshener to get rid of the floor leek smell. That always works, right?

      Jul 22, 2013 at 7:45 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #4.4   The Elf

      Mmmmhmmmm! Nothing says “fresh bathroom” like coconut and leek with an underlying base scent of mildew.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 6:50 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #5   Beatus Mongous

    My guess is the note writer either has the wrong kind of paint in the bathroom, or the note writer is taking 30 minute showers with the hot water on too high.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 2:34 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Cerys

      Yeah, I was going to suggest steam causing condensation damage.

      Jul 25, 2013 at 12:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #6   Batman

    Those pesky leeks…always causing trouble with their raucous bathroom parties that ruin everything. Don’t they realize that their behavior affects others, too?

    Jul 22, 2013 at 3:12 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #7   Snicklefritz

    Where I come from “taking a leak” means you’re going to steal a mirror.

    Not sure what stopping a leak means. Or leek as the case may be.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 3:35 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   NoAdditives

      Dude, where are you from?!

      Jul 22, 2013 at 4:33 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   whome

      Where on earth are you from?

      Jul 22, 2013 at 4:36 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #7.3   Lythande

      I’m interested in what part of the world has “take a leak” mean “steal a mirror”, but I’m more interested in what part of the world apparently doesn’t have “stopping a leak” mean “make an area where water is leaking stop leaking water”.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 5:22 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #7.4   H for Toy bang

      And “stealing a mirror” means “jumping in a pothole” and “jumping in a pothole” means “flashing the lights” and ” flashing the lights” means “talking to a man about a horse” and everybody knows what that means.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 5:23 pm   rating: 41  small thumbs up

    • #7.5   Kilgore Trout

      Snicklefritz isn’t from any part of the world, he’s from Tralfamadore! You can Google that if you’re not caught up on your Vonnegut.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 5:58 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #7.6   Poltergeist

      I’ve been to where Snicklefritz is from, and I can assure you that they are idiots for idioms in that town.

      Another example of the local lingo – “taking a dump” means you’re going to steal a china cabinet.

      Jul 22, 2013 at 8:20 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #7.7   Snicklefritz

      I’m from the USA, currently residing in Philly. but I was quoting Vonnegut’s Breakfast of Champions. and oooh, so close, Kilgore, I’m a she with a twisted sense of humor, not a he.

      “Trout did another thing which some people might have considered eccentric: he called mirrors ‘leaks’. It amused him to pretend that mirrors were holes between two universes.”

      Jul 23, 2013 at 12:45 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #7.8   H for Toy

      Ugh. Philly. I spent a week there one night.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 2:11 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #7.9   The Elf

      Don’t knock it. They have a very fine collection of medical oddities and anatomical specimens. There’s also the Mutter Museum.

      Jul 24, 2013 at 6:50 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #7.10   H for Toy

      Ha! Have you been to the Eastern State Penitentiary? Well worth the visit, I think. My grudge against Philly is that I get lost in bad neighborhoods every other time I go, so I haven’t been in almost 10 years. I do have a GPS now, so I might try again someday.

      Jul 24, 2013 at 7:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #8   Lythande

    I live in a downstairs unit and actually had a similar problem recently – except I did the responsible thing and went to the management to deal with it, instead of leaving a delightful PA note.

    They thought it was that the upstairs neighbors (and their four kids) were showering with the curtain outside the shower and letting water through the too-thin flooring, but on second visit they found that their bath taps and shower head and toilet were all really loose and letting the water through. So I guess I’m saying two things: the neighbor should be talking to building management (unless you’re in a situation where you all own and are 100% responsible for your own units?) and that if she says there’s a problem, there probably is, even if you don’t see it.

    Assuming she put the note in the right letter-box, anyway.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 5:20 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   FeRD bang


      …Well, you’re no fun. :cry:

      Jul 22, 2013 at 8:40 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   Lythande

      You’re right; I wasn’t thinking clearly that day. In the future I’ll remember to feed the site. It wouldn’t do for PAN to go out of business because of such selfishness.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 5:44 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   Dana

      In the UK most flats (or condos) are individually owned or let so it is rare to have one building under a single manager !

      Many cities have blocks of flats in poor repair as no one person is responsible for the upkeep !

      Jul 31, 2013 at 7:50 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #9   warns

    Unless this is in a condo complex, I’d say this is something to take up with the landlord, no? And unless this letter writer is a plumber (guessing they’re not) they’d have no idea where the “leek” was coming from, just assuming it’s someone else’ fault.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 7:06 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #10   drew

    Clearly you need some potatoes and ham to go with the leeks. It’s a lovely fall soup!

    Jul 22, 2013 at 7:30 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

  • #11   Nunavut Guy

    1. Consume potatoes,ham and leeks.

    2.Switch cold water supply to toilet with hot water supply.

    3.Wait two hours (more if you add cheese) and visit said toilet…….voila……a delicious fall soup!

    Not bragging but this is my own recipe.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 8:03 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

  • #12   Poltergeist

    Oh I get it! So write/wright and leak/leek are akin to neighbor/neighbour. It all makes sense now!

    You Brits sure are sofisticatid in the way you spell things.

    Jul 22, 2013 at 8:37 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   The Elf

      I think you just realised the centre of this discussion. The difference is because they were civilised first. But you can’t take offence! It’s just one of those minor cultural differences – just over the way words are spelt – that can be the source of a lot of humour. I’ve often considered that our dictionaries should include a British spelling annexe, but that would be a real pain in the arse.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 7:07 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   Spelling

      The correct English spelling is write, leak, and neighbour.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 7:49 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   spacenomyous bang

      “How can we get that “OU” sound?”

      “Well, a “U” will work,”

      “What about an “O” as well?”

      “We don’t need it, we’re fine.”

      “No, I think an “O” in.”

      “Well, all right.”

      “And a “G” as well.”


      “Yes, a “G” would be good. We need a silent “G” in the background, in case of any accidents or something.”

      “Well, all right.”

      “And an “H” as well.”

      “F’king ‘ell! Hang on.”

      “An “H” in case some herbs come along.”

      “All right…”

      “And a Q, and a P, and a Z… Look it’s a word in Scrabble that’s 480 points!”

      Jul 23, 2013 at 7:57 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   Wally Bets

      Mr Izzard!!! I Love this. And him.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 11:33 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #13   Mith

    You might be having the same problem I did. The neighbor from below accused me of having a leak in my bathroom, but it was dry and and clean every time the landlord came to inspect it. Finally, I figured out it was happenning an hour or so every time after I took a bath. After I let the water from the bathtub, it apparently overflowed somewhere between my floor and neighbor’s ceiling.

    Hope it helps.

    Jul 23, 2013 at 7:51 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   redheadwglasses

      We had that exact same problem in my previous (condo) building.

      And the two people who had water damage didn’t have to pay to fix it — the association did.

      Jul 23, 2013 at 11:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #14   bob loblaw

    Just an FYI neighbour.

    That ain’t my bathroom that is leeking (sic), that’s me pissing on the floor.

    So have a grand day with that.

    Jul 23, 2013 at 9:51 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #15   Rachel

    She can spell ceiling, but she can’t spell write? Or LEAK??


    Jul 23, 2013 at 10:50 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #16   Raichu

    *checks for leeks* Nope, none. Let me know if you find any though. I need to eat more vegetables. u_u

    Jul 23, 2013 at 11:45 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #17   CG bang

    Well, Note “wrighter”… I think people should keep their leeks wherever they find more appropriate. It’s none of your business!

    Jul 23, 2013 at 12:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #18   joy

    More likely they’re soaking the bathroom floor when showering and not clearing it up. Either that or they have kids who are. Plus I doubt they can see under their bath if there’s a leak.

    Aug 2, 2013 at 9:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #19   AnimusFuriae

    A likely story, lady.


    Aug 8, 2013 at 5:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #20   Liz

    Yeeeeeah this happened to me once living in student housing and it was the pipe between the floors that was leaking. (Granted, they proceeded to NOT FIX IT no matter how many work orders I put in…)

    Sep 1, 2013 at 1:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up


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