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The Office Fridge Obituaries

August 13th, 2013 · 36 comments

Writes our submitter in Australia: “Our office has been quite settled for the past few years without any issues, but recently fridge items have started to go missing. I’ve lost my own odd pieces of lunch to our unknown thief, so I sympathise completely.”

Tzatziki dip 12.08.2013-12.08-2013  Tzatziki dip, affectionately known as

related: Dear ‘Desperate for Salad’

FILED UNDER: Australia · office fridge · sad face · stealing

36 responses so far ↓

  • #1   TTFG

    I feel for this poor soul, having to resort to Maccas :(

    Aug 13, 2013 at 2:00 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

  • #2   Jessi

    I feel stupid. It took me about 15 seconds to realize why the date on the note was 12-8-13.

    That being said, that’s an awfully quick turnaround, PAN. This event happened today, was pictured today and posted today?

    Does the submitter know you personally?

    Aug 13, 2013 at 2:03 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   TTFG

      It’s late afternoon on the 13th in Australia :)

      Aug 13, 2013 at 2:10 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Jessi

      Again, with the feeling stupid.

      It’s been a long day and, apparently, my brain has just given up with the whole “thinking” thing, haha!

      Aug 13, 2013 at 2:18 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   redheadwglasses

      I submitted one last week and am waiting anxiously for it to appear! (A work friend sent it to me and gave me permission to post it when I asked.) I would not have expected the sort of turnaround this note got. Maybe my own PAN sucked.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 11:51 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   weed store

      lol dude i know what uve been doing lol

      Aug 13, 2013 at 11:53 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   H for Toy

      Me too, red. I thought maye there was a backlog. I guess not all notes are PAN-worthy.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 4:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #3   zenvelo

    In Australia, the possessive “dips” is spelled with an accent aigu over the ‘s’? Sure helps settle that pesky apostrophe placement.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 6:37 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   john

      Wow, what a pathetic picky comment. You must have a really small dick.

      Aug 17, 2013 at 7:40 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #4   zenvelo

    Perhaps the thief was trying to keep the poster’s stomach culturally aligned. No telling what would happen putting Greek sauce onto Turkish bread.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 6:38 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Neeners


      Aug 13, 2013 at 9:12 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   Snowflame

      A reunited Cyprus?

      Aug 13, 2013 at 1:02 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

  • #5   jj

    Sweetest passive aggressive note on here!
    Poor, poor dip!

    Aug 13, 2013 at 7:11 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #6   Brandy

    but 12-08-13, Is it also December in Australia? Or did the person switch some numbers around and it’s supposed to be Aug. 13, 2012?

    Aug 13, 2013 at 7:11 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   Sue Sharp

      It *is* 13 August. Putting the month first is an entirely US habit…

      Aug 13, 2013 at 7:13 am   rating: 54  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   Jessi

      What Sue said. Hence my original stupidity. It took me a few seconds to step outside my ethnocentric bubble and remember that we’re one of the only countries (if not *the* only country) to list the date as month/day/year. Day/month/year makes so much more sense, when you think about it.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 7:34 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #6.3   drop in

      Get a clue (original poster)!
      However, Japan does year, month, day – which also makes sense. Maybe other parts of Asia too.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 8:22 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #6.4   kjordan

      There’s an international standard that does it as year-month-day. That’s what I tend to use as it’s used a lot in databases and other computer storage.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 10:42 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #6.5   redheadwglasses

      My workplace celebrates all employees’ birthdays. X’s birthday was August 4. BUt really, his birthday is April 8. There was some confusion when his parents came from Laos to America and they wrote his birthday down as most of the world does — date, month, year — and the U.S. government employee put it in the computer as April 8, xxxx rather than 4 August xxxx.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 11:53 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #6.6   shane

      Ha, and i suppose now that his birthday was put into the computer erroneously as 4-Aug, it is just easier to keep celebrating on this day rather than fix the database. (This would have made a good Dilbert cartoon)

      Aug 13, 2013 at 12:43 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #6.7   The Elf

      We Americans set the way we write out dates so we can instantly spot those coming in from outside the border and discriminate appropriately.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 2:57 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

    • #6.8   zenvelo

      Only the U.S. has March 14 as Pi Day (3/14).

      The rest of the world has July 22 as Pi Approximation Day (22/7).

      Aug 13, 2013 at 3:23 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #6.9   Raichu

      And just like the metric system – the international way of writing dates makes much more actual sense than ours. x.x

      Aug 13, 2013 at 8:48 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #6.10   drop in

      I think year, month, day, or day, month, year make a lot of sense. Month, day, year is a little harder to follow, not being biggest to smallest, nor smallest to biggest. I nearly always write out the month alphabetically (if allowed), because you never know whose date system you’re crossing.

      Aug 14, 2013 at 7:26 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #7   Tard

    My favorite note.
    I’d whip-up some ‘tombstone cupcakes’ for the next day, hold a wake.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 7:52 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

  • #8   Lil'

    This post reminded me of another food obituary:

    The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

    Doughboy was buried in a lightly-greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry
    Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Cap’n Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours as long- time friend, Aunt Jemima, delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very “smart” cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he — even still, as a crusty old man — was considered a roll model for millions.
    Toward the end, it was thought he would rise again, but alas, he was no tart.

    Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children, John Dough and Jane Dough; plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by
    his elderly father, Pop Tart.

    The funeral was held at 3:50 for about twenty minutes.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 7:57 am   rating: 42  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   KittenPlaysTheViolin

      Now that is gold I tell you.

      Aug 13, 2013 at 1:54 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #9   Neeners

    What I like about this is that it is all about the dip. A serenade to what could have been, more than an out and out attack on the knife-wielding thief. Incidentally, it could have been a spoon wielding thief, that would have been my personal choice. Why take the chance that the food your stealing will slip off the knife?

    Aug 13, 2013 at 9:10 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

  • #10   jollyroger

    I would think a simple tour of the office would suffice to find the knife weilder. A garlic based dip is not the friend any person trying to hide the fact that they had consumed your mediteranean delight.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 10:29 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Jo

      Ah, but what about all the other garlic-lovers in the office who also reek?

      Aug 13, 2013 at 1:49 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #11   Ely North

    I find this note lacks commitment. You want to make your point? Engrave your message on a tombstone.

    Aug 13, 2013 at 2:54 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Lil'

      Perhaps a Tombstone pizza?

      Aug 14, 2013 at 7:02 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #12   Poltergeist

    Why must the delicious die young?

    Aug 13, 2013 at 5:26 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   drop in

      Sooner or later it comes down to fate.

      Aug 14, 2013 at 7:29 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #13   Dom

    My favourite part is all the comments confused over the date. Hah

    Aug 14, 2013 at 2:24 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #14   Divorceddoodling

    Brilliant! Despite their obvious anger over missing tzatziki replaced by a yech Mcdonald’s burger – they have turned to poetry.
    Honestly – what else could they have done?
    Is this really passive aggressive?
    I guess…

    Aug 15, 2013 at 3:44 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up


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