Is that a chicken wing in your pocket, or…

September 16th, 2013 · 18 comments

Those must be some darn big pockets you’ve got there, Elwood.

Elwood- I have you on video tape stuffing chicken wings in your pockets! You owe $82. Roper

(Thanks to Jessi in Illinois for submitting!)

related: A Roadside Intervention

extra credit: “Men accused of stealing $65,000 in chicken wings” []

FILED UNDER: food · Illinois · money · most popular notes of 2013 · public shaming · small town living · stealing

18 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Scott C

    Pfft, only $82 of wings? Elwood’s a lightweight.

    Sep 16, 2013 at 9:11 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

  • #2   Mishee

    Ummm… he was getting those for Jake! All he wanted was some toasted white bread! (no butter)

    Sep 16, 2013 at 11:42 pm   rating: 43  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   FeRD bang


      Sep 17, 2013 at 4:24 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   The Elf

      Four pockets of chicken wings and a coke.

      Sep 17, 2013 at 7:48 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   Snicklefritz

      No Coke

      Sep 17, 2013 at 8:34 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   redheadwglasses

      Ferd, you made my morning! I had “rubber biscuit” on vinyl — a 45!

      Sep 17, 2013 at 11:32 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   Snowflame

      Hey, he has a *right* to those chicken wings. He’s on a mission from God.

      Sep 17, 2013 at 12:18 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #2.6   redheadwglasses

      Elwood! What happens when you throw the rubber biscuit against a wall and it doesn’t bounce into your mouth?

      Elwood: “What?”


      Sep 17, 2013 at 12:21 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #2.7   redheadwglasses

      My memory wasn’t so bad:

      Sep 17, 2013 at 12:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #3   kitten mittons!

    “I want my (eighty) two dollars!!”

    Sep 17, 2013 at 12:09 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Jessi

      See… the problem here is that… my little brother, this morning, got his arm caught in the microwave, and uh… my grandmother dropped acid and she freaked out, and hijacked a school bus full of… penguins, so it’s kind of a family crisis… so come back later? Great.

      Sep 17, 2013 at 1:14 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

  • #4   My name is Princess!

    Huh?! Wuth chithen winth?

    Sep 17, 2013 at 11:14 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #5   Meeshypoo bang

    Is anyone else picturing Mr. Roper saying that? And then the camera pans over to Jack, looking knowingly into the camera with a sheepish grin?

    Sep 17, 2013 at 11:55 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

  • #6   Poltergeist

    Well, you see, I bought these pants without trying them on first but realized they were much too loose after I got home. I had to stuff them with something! I can’t be seen around the projects looking like I can’t fill out a pair of sweatpants!

    Sep 17, 2013 at 1:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #7   Ely North

    Never steal chicken wings from a place where they know your name. You gotta go to the buffet two towns over to pull off a maneuver like that.

    Sep 17, 2013 at 6:55 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

  • #8   Ace of Space

    At least they were in his pockets and not down his pants.

    Sep 18, 2013 at 10:40 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   The Elf

      Yeah, the buffalo sauce would sting a bit.

      Sep 18, 2013 at 10:43 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #9   KittenPlaysTheViolin

    This alleged videotape needs to be uploaded to YouTube.

    Sep 24, 2013 at 12:19 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up


Comments are Closed