Well, he has a point.
…but then again, what good passive-aggresive note pays attention to silly things like “reason” or “logic”?
related: An academic epidemic
FILED UNDER: dishes · office · rebuttals · warning
Resistance is futile.
Sep 23, 2013 at 9:38 pm rating: 12
The is what happens when you don’t let your cat outside. The indoor fauna gets killed.
Sep 24, 2013 at 1:02 pm rating: 6
That lino is fucking unspeakable.
Sep 23, 2013 at 10:50 pm rating: 19
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:36 am rating: 1
“Vintage”. Read: Really old and needs replacing, but the landlord hasn’t bothered because….. meh. It still functions as a floor.
Sep 24, 2013 at 12:13 pm rating: 10
Gawd. My parents installed that same lino in our kitchen in 1974 or so… but in Harvest Gold.
Sep 24, 2013 at 1:37 pm rating: 11
As people with terrible taste/people who are too lazy to replace things would say-
“It has a lot of character.”
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:53 pm rating: 3
We’re abbreviating the word “linoleum” now? If someone did that in conversation, I’d look at ‘em the way I would if they, with sincerity, said “totes” instead of “totally” or used the phrase “for realz.”
If we’re calling it something other than the word linoleum, I prefer “the flooring which shall not be named.” They probably use it in the Slytherin common room.
Sep 25, 2013 at 10:47 pm rating: 10
I’d always pictured the Slytherin common room with something along the lines of slate, not linoleum. Of course, I’ve never actually been in there, so that is just a guess on my part.
Sep 26, 2013 at 2:54 am rating: 1
Yikes! That is some ugly floor/wall covering that the dead roach is displayed on.
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:03 am rating: 4
H for Toy
I’m pretty sure that linoleum is actually what killed the roach.
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:06 am rating: 49
The Gecko Hunter
Oh the humanity!
Resorting to weapons of mass tackiness in order to commit roach genocide. What’s next, gold shag carpeting? Avocado green appliances? Wood paneling? Swag lamps?
Sep 24, 2013 at 6:13 pm rating: 10
Fun and true story: when my family moved into our current house about 15 years ago, the basement was decorated thus: electric blue shag carpet on the stairs, dark-orange-and-dark-green checker-patterned carpet on the floor, wood plank on two walls, stone on one wall (the only wall we haven’t changed) and cork on the last wall. The cork was crumbling. There was also a bright orange cabinet and dark orange wet bar.
Needless to say, it does not look like that anymore.
Sep 26, 2013 at 1:33 pm rating: 1
As I understand it, by the time you see one roach it’s much, much too late to hope that the problem will go away by keeping the dishes washed.
Sep 24, 2013 at 9:38 am rating: 7
Yep. If you see a roach, it’s because they’ve settled in and gotten comfortable enough to be seen. They’re not just picking off little food bits from the dishes, they’re using your Twinkies as lounge chairs.
Sep 24, 2013 at 12:16 pm rating: 13
Oh, I’ve got one of those:
Sep 24, 2013 at 12:13 pm rating: 1
Well now, surely they can read if they can write .
Sep 24, 2013 at 6:07 pm rating: 0
*roaches can’t read* Ah, but, the human cockroaches leaving the roach-attracting filthy dishes (hopefully) can.
Sep 24, 2013 at 12:48 pm rating: 4
I’ll tell ya, it ain’t filthy dishes that attract roaches (unless already present, such as in a multi-unit building). You’ve got to have some deeper filth than just dishes to harbor an infestation. Grease and grime is what they really love to live in.
Sep 24, 2013 at 6:13 pm rating: 3
I’m in the mood to re-watch “Joe’s Apartment.”
Sep 24, 2013 at 5:00 pm rating: 2
They can stay when they start payin’ rent. Till then, they get smashed, and not the kind that involves a hangover the next day.
Sep 26, 2013 at 12:20 pm rating: 0
The third note would be funny if it were easier to understand, I think.
Sep 26, 2013 at 1:35 pm rating: 0
It’s well-known that cockroaches are attracted by the smell of disrespect.
Nov 16, 2013 at 3:11 pm rating: 0
— The Beast Among Us
2011: The Top Notes of the Year
2010: The Funniest Notes of the Year
2009: The Best Notes of the Year
2008: Your Favorite Notes of the Year
Carnivores: keep being awesome!
actually totally reasonable
a little patronizing
clip art catastrophe
flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens
landlords and property managers
Moms & Dads
more aggressive than passive
most popular notes of 2010
most popular notes of 2011
most popular notes of 2012
most popular notes of 2013
now that's management
sex sex sex
signed with love
spelling and grammar police
thanks (but not really)
unnecessary "quotation marks"
You call that punctuation?