WiBuy Local?

October 24th, 2013 · 68 comments

“Foster’s Market in Chapel Hill, North Carolina is a pretty popular place right off a college campus,” says our submitter, Hope. “Lots of students come in, maybe get a coffee and sit for hours using the free wireless without buying anything else.” In response, the owners recently changed the name of the WiFi network. Gets the point across, no?

Our wireless network is called 'BUY A SANDWICH' and does not require a password

related: Passive-Aggressive WiFi

FILED UNDER: "customer service" · most popular notes of 2013 · North Carolina · restaurant


68 responses so far ↓

  • #1   TKD

    Our wifi is “Don’t just say it, put it in a note”

    Oct 24, 2013 at 7:17 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   jen

      Say it to every customer that comes in?

      Oct 24, 2013 at 7:35 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Paula

    my husband’s company wifi (that is not open to public use) is “Caught you looking”

    Oct 24, 2013 at 7:35 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   jen

      i’d write something terribly witty but nobody speaks much english here. might be lost in translation. otherwise, i’d be hilarious…really.

      Oct 24, 2013 at 7:38 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Lainey

      We wanted to see if we could freak out our paranoia driven redneck jamboree neighbors by naming ours “CIA Stakeout Van”

      Oct 24, 2013 at 1:26 pm   rating: 47  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   AuntyBron

      Mine is “FBI Surveillance Van”

      Oct 24, 2013 at 4:10 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   Headset Hellion

      Ooh, that’s original!

      Oct 24, 2013 at 5:29 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Geek Goddess

      We had one called “Free, but slow as shit”. For any of our neighbours who were poor and internet deprived. The fast one we kept for ourselves with a password.

      Oct 25, 2013 at 12:49 am   rating: 45  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   redheadwglasses

      GeekGoddess, I think that’s pretty damn cool, to even provide them with some free wifi.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 12:23 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.7   K

      My mom’s internet is named “Caprica” after the planet on Battlestar Galactica- you know, the one that was brought down by having all their secure information in the wireless networks?

      she didn’t get the irony.

      Oct 27, 2013 at 9:14 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.8   it's naptime

      I’m wondering how many networks are named “Penny is a freeloader.”

      Oct 28, 2013 at 9:34 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.9   Geek Goddess

      Red, it was my son who thought of it and set it up. I think he is pretty damn cool, even though he was the child who gave me more trouble than the others all put together.

      Oct 31, 2013 at 2:10 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   jUstPunkin

    P-A Win! That would make me laugh (and buy a sandwich)

    Oct 24, 2013 at 8:14 am   rating: 30  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   wolfair

    Mine WiFi say G_Spot! How about that. :-)

    Oct 24, 2013 at 8:19 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Jami

      I have a friend in Alabama who’s wifi name at one point was “Wolfman has nards.” None of her neighbors got The Monster Squad reference. Uncultured swine.

      Oct 24, 2013 at 9:32 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Tom

      There is a wifi network I can see from my apartment named “Get your own wifi bitch”. Appropriately, it is password protected.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 10:47 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Don't buy a deli

    We changed the password every morning to whatever the special was that day (up on the chalkboard).
    No notes, you’ve gotta be on the inside track to know it, so hipster douchebags are charged while the rest get on for free.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 8:24 am   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Pit Pat

      Disdain for the people who buy your products? Perks for the cool people in the in-club? That’s some great customer service right there.

      Oct 24, 2013 at 12:28 pm   rating: 51  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Jessi

      @Pit Pat, I think the problem is that the people who aren’t in the know *don’t* buy the deli’s products. Hence the derision.

      Oct 24, 2013 at 10:53 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Pit Pat

      That’s not what I got from that comment. And if “hipster douchebags” are being charged for something, then they are customers. Just not the cool ones, apparently.

      Oct 25, 2013 at 9:12 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   Don't buy a deli

      These were college-town hipsters, meaning NO trust fund; they took up the tables and didn’t buy anything so they could post ironically about things I wouldn’t have heard about.

      So, technically they weren’t even customers!

      Oct 25, 2013 at 9:17 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Pit Pat

      In that case, I can understand. The tone of your first post rubbed me the wrong way. I am just getting tired of people being put down because of how they dress or whatever. I don’t emulate the hipster style (being a 43-y-o sort-of soccer mom), but the grief they get seems silly. And I hate the word “douchebag.”

      Oct 25, 2013 at 10:39 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   redheadwglasses

      PitPat:

      1. fair enough comment re: hipsters. You are right.

      2. “Douchebag.” I let this slip the other day at my boyfriend’s house and his 6yo called me on it! Yikes.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 12:25 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.7   Pit Pat

      Oh yes, they will do that. I have to self-edit all day long. My 6yo is experimenting with swearing. He told me that sometimes he says “hell,” but only when no one can hear him.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 8:12 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   bob loblaw

    Maybe cleaning the filth off the glass food case might improve sandwich sales a wee bit.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 8:50 am   rating: 75  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   kaetra

    Free wi-fi at restaurants naturally encourages loitering. I personally don’t understand why all these restaurants offer it, and are then surprised when they have the majority of their tables being camped by douchebags. It seems like a “free wi-fi” sign frequently translates to “eat somewhere else”.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 9:05 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Quite Contrary

    Some say greed is good. There are times that guilt is good, if not better.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 9:58 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Grumblebee

    To be fair, both the case and counter look repulsive and I’d rather eat out Steve Buscemi’s asshole than anything stored near that mess.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 11:40 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Snowflame

      Wait, does Steve Buscemi’s asshole even have WiFi?

      Oct 26, 2013 at 6:53 am   rating: 33  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Lissachck

      He wouldn’t tip you, though.

      Oct 27, 2013 at 5:37 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   135L

    Love that this is actually passive-agressive and not just funny. If I’m ever in that part of the country, I’ll stop in to buy a sandwich or two just to pay back the humor.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 11:46 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Raichu

    Technically they’re not doing anything wrong. If you want them to buy a sandwich before using your wifi, you should put in a password.

    And yeah, clean up that counter. yuck.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 12:39 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   anon

    Yeah, Foster’s used to be awesome 15 years ago. The last time I went there I bought something, then left without eating it when the waitstaff brought it to my table with gnarly nails and some sort of open abscess looking wound on her face. barf. Go to the original Foster’s in Durham. Same menu, less dirty hippies.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 1:30 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   AH

    The trend must be catching– the WiFi password is “didyoubuyadrink” at my hometown coffee shop.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 6:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   TRT

      Someone in our block of flats has changed their’s to “All the parking spaces gone again”

      Oct 28, 2013 at 6:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   kacie

    For awhile, my Wi-Fi name was Givemeyourpants – the password was Givemeyourkeys. Any of the other college students living nearby that were fans of Red Stripe commercials could use my Wi-Fi (yes, commercials, not the beer) because, well, they got the joke.
    Right now I want to rename my hotspot to INS surveillance – but I think it might be a little too pointed at the ever rotating group of people living and working for a roofing company next door.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 6:54 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   FeatherBlade

      It’s just as well, I think they changed their acronym to ICE a few years back; Immigration and Customs Enforcement or some such.

      Y’know, cooler names for those under the Homeland “Security” umbrella.

      Oct 25, 2013 at 3:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   kacie

      See, I knew that… just the lack of actual need to worry about the group kind of pushes the “appropriate” name for it out of my head.
      Should they play any more loud, obnoxious Mexi-polka music at three a.m., I’ll make sure to change the wireless name to the proper title.
      I’m sure they know the correct acronym.
      I would be less cranky about this if they hadn’t been so loud last night and I’d gotten any sleep…

      Oct 27, 2013 at 8:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   H for Toy

    My wi-fi is named belkin54, because I am too busy reading PAN comments to come up with anything creative.

    Oct 24, 2013 at 8:58 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Redheadwglasses

      You are my soulmate!!!

      Oct 25, 2013 at 9:03 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.2   shwo! bang

      And you didn’t change the default username and password! Thanks, Hfer! I’ve just been “cleaning up” some of your files. Nothing to worry about, but if you see black SUVs suddenly pull up to your place, you might want to sneak out the back. And assume a new identity. In Patagonia.

      Oct 25, 2013 at 9:00 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.3   redheadwglasses

      show, that actually happened to a guy I know! He opened his front door one night… to find FBI agents.

      His ISP reported the download of child (teen) porn. Yikes. He immediately let the FBI take his computer, etc., and he told them that while he was in IT, he had some security measures on his internet but they weren’t as stringent as they could/should be. (and he was embarrassed as hell about this, given his line of work)

      FBI figured it out pretty quickly that the very bad teenage kid of the Neighbor From Hell had hacked into the internet and was responsible for the underage porn. Kid got in trouble, guy was given a scolding by the FBI for knowing better but doing little, the kid’s mom tried to blame my friend and ragged to all the neighbors about it, and the entire neighborhood shunned that mother after that.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 12:31 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.4   H for Toy

      I knew I liked you, Red!

      Again, shwo? I don’t understand how people are always hacking into my computer. Who knew “password1234″ was going to be so easy to guess?

      Oct 26, 2013 at 9:51 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.5   Raichu

      ugh, that kid was being a turd, but the worst person in that scenario is the mom. D:<

      Oct 26, 2013 at 11:23 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.6   Redheadwglasses

      I agree, raichu. 17yo kid wants to see naked 15yos? That doesn’t seem so awful to me.

      Oct 27, 2013 at 4:37 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.7   FeatherBlade

      The fact that there are pictures available of naked 15 year-olds is, though. And you can be sure it isn’t the 17 year-olds that are taking them and posting them

      Oct 28, 2013 at 1:05 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.8   The Elf

      I’ve got the same combination on my luggage, Toy.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 10:15 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   shepd

    My wifi name is terribly boring but useful. It’s the housenumber + streetname. Reasoning behind it is if for some reason it’s screwing up someone’s use of the airwaves, at least they can come over and have a civil conversation about it and I can fix it. I guess it’s like the opposite of a passive aggressive note?

    Yes, 10 years ago that would have advertised break into the house and steal shit, but nowadays who really wants a $14 router?

    Oct 25, 2013 at 4:09 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   kermit

      If somebody wants to break into your house, they’re not going to steal your $14 router unless that’s the most expensive thing you keep in your house.

      I’m curious to know how you envision your wifi signal screwing up somebody else’s use of the airwaves. Seriously, how would that work?

      Oct 25, 2013 at 8:43 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Mysty

      Certain wireless signals can interfere with others. My university had full wifi all across campus, and the dorms didn’t allow you to have wireless printers or your own router because they’d been known in the past to interfere with the wifi signals (interrupt, slow down etc). Obviously not all will do that, but better safe than sorry, I guess.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 10:05 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   kermit

      Mysty, I’m not buying that. That’s just an excuse the IT people thought up to prevent having to deal with bogus calls.

      They likely got a lot of calls from students claiming the internet wasn’t working when in fact the student was logged onto somebody’s wireless printer instead of the actual wifi network. It’s also possible that some students messed with people’s wireless printers, so getting rid of them solves all these problems.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 4:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Mysty

      Actually it’s true, because if you have a bunch of stuff all running on the same 2.4GHz band (the most common one for wireless devices like routers) it can get crowded. The same problem crops up with some appliances like microwaves, but I’d like to see the guy brave enough to ban microwaves in a college dorm. I imagine if the ban wasn’t always in place there would’ve been at least one instance of a mass butt printing, though. You don’t need a photocopier to get a picture of that with the advent of the internet.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 5:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   TRT

      How jolly civil of you. I’ve spent Saturday evening wardriving the dead end roads from hell in Chalfont St. Peter looking for some c*** with a Draytek router blasting over all 2.4GHz channels for around a quarter-of-a-mile radius making everyone else’s routers back off.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 6:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   FeatherBlade

      My dad had this problem in a previous neighborhood: every different house had its own wireless access point, on the same channel of the same band, and they started interfering with each other.

      It’s not a hard problem to fix though – you just change the channel on your router. There are eleven or so to choose from after all.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 1:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   shwo! bang

    I would name the access point, “Everyone stare at the guy without a laptop and don’t say anything.”

    Oct 25, 2013 at 9:02 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   redheadwglasses

      You know, tonight in World of Warcraft, I presented a certain challenge in trade chat and said I’d give 5,000 gold to whomever made me laugh. They all failed (it was nothing but teen boys on tonight, judging by the language and use of the N word).

      I hereby give you 5,000 gold.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 12:33 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   shwo! bang

      Aw, thanks, Red. I promise to use them only for good, although it would be much more fun to use them for mischief.

      Oct 26, 2013 at 1:08 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Shannon

    I live near Fosters in CH. They also turn the wifi off during lunch so that people working have to go elsewhere to make room for people who want to, you know, eat lunch.

    Oct 26, 2013 at 10:59 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   MickeyButters

      By “working” don’t you mean “surfing”?

      Oct 26, 2013 at 6:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   Carolina Girl

    I too live near Fosters, and I know Dan (the owner). Although I don’t know him that well (my relationship with him is about business, not friendship), I do know that he is a very cool guy and really tries to keep business good without being too…. douchey.

    Oct 27, 2013 at 10:28 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Lythande

      You should mention to him that the internet thinks his counters are disgusting.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 6:00 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   kermit

      Not for nothin’, but the only way that you’re ever going to get that clean is if you unscrew the metal frame away from the glass and have it de-rusted somehow.

      In other words, nobody ever does that; they either get a new display counter or leave it like that because the “dirt” isn’t anywhere near the food.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 6:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Brittni

    I will never understand the purpose of capitalizing the first letter of every word in public notes.

    Oct 29, 2013 at 9:31 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Joey

    Haha, I went to UNC, and I saw this picture and thought to myself “Hmmmm…this sounds like it would happen at Foster’s”, then I saw the caption.

    Oct 31, 2013 at 1:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Momof4

    Our wifi network is called NachoWireless, for those who are a little slow…that’s as in not your wireless.

    Nov 6, 2013 at 4:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   DukeAlum2011

    Foster’s is in Durham, NOT Chapel Hill.

    Nov 8, 2013 at 2:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   alan

      Foster’s is ALSO in Chapel Hill. On Airport Rd/MLKJr Blvd.

      Sheesh.

      Dec 19, 2013 at 7:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   prefabricated carport

    Every business is different and you will be able to park your car or truck.
    Receive daily news stories and stay current by clicking on the subscribe button at the top of the flat roof in the future as well as apartment complexes, hay storage and as livestock shade.
    Spend that much money just so you only have to fork up hundreds of carport fort worth dollars per month
    that you’ll never get back. Not only does an enclosed garage protect
    your vehicles.

    Apr 10, 2014 at 2:43 pm   rating: 0  [  ]