Trouble is brewing

March 9th, 2014 · 104 comments

Writes Patrick in Wisconsin: “A member of our office staff prefers a lighter blend, while the rest of us tech guys prefer a cup of coffee that will actually wake us up.”

After the original laminated note spurred this tempest in a coffee pot, Patrick says that Ms. “Three Scoops” upped the ante by bringing in a second coffeemaker for her own personal use. The notes, however, remain.

3 Scoops of grounds brews a great pot of coffee.  If you like coffee so weak that you can see through it. If you're looking for mud, please see Starbucks. :) Considering that Starbucks is one of the most successful businesses in history, they probably know a thing or two about making coffee.  Good Point, and to continue your example, even Starbucks has a blonde roast. They found that many customers demanded a lighter coffee, because they didn't want swampwater. :-P  Note it is called Blonde Blend!  Crafty people discovered a long time ago that you can turn coffee that is too strong into weaker coffee by simply adding water. However to turn (brown) water into something else, one needs the power of the almighty.

related: Coffee-brewing for engineers

FILED UNDER: a matter of taste · coffee · office · saga · Starbucks

104 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Kay A. Ess

    The last note says it all. You can make dark coffee lighter by adding a bit of water. Or more milk, if that’s your thing. Heck, an ice cube in the coffee will not only lighten the coffee, it will cool it to a temp where you can actually drink it.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Baron

      Coffee shouldn’t be so hot you can’t drink it straight away in the first place, if it is then it’s being made wrong

      Mar 10, 2014 at 12:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   Tesselara

      “needs the power of the almighty” = happy tummy feelings. Thank you, notewriter!

      Mar 10, 2014 at 8:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   KittenPlaysTheViolin

      Baron I’m going to have to disagree with you. Coffee is meant to be piping hot. You are suppose to use 195 degree Fahrenheit water in a French press. Good luck drinking that straight away.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 11:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   catethulhu

      As a French press user I can attest to this. It’s called “waiting for it to cool down.” Besides, doesn’t the water have to be pretty hot to brew the coffee right?
      I looked it up, it’s supposed to be between 195-205 to brew correctly.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 12:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.5   The Elf

      Totally agree – water that stuff down or get a second pot to brew to your preference. The stronger preference wins out in a shared pot.

      I used to ride my motorcycle in all but the worst weather to a rail station. The guy who ran the station – a railroader from way back – kept a pot of coffee made to his preference. I like my coffee strong, but people who are used to working shift and having to stay alert all night long generally like their strong enough to dissolve metal.

      I’d walk in, shivering from the cold, and warm myself up with a nice cup of 50% water, 50% death coffee.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 7:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.6   pooham

      I like that you ride a motorcycle Elf.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 10:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.7   The Elf


      Mar 11, 2014 at 11:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.8   The Beast Among Us

      Used to ride. Elf USED TO ride a motorcycle.

      Dammit, Elf.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 11:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.9   The Elf

      Still do, and it’s coming out of winter storage soon. I just no longer ride in any non-snow weather. I’ve gotten soft – I wait until it is consistently above 40F in the mornings.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 1:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   kermit

    *coffee snobbery advisory*

    The light roast coffee actually has more caffeine in it than the dark roast. That’s why it’s usually the “morning blend”.

    Also, three scoops of coffee for an entire pot is an abomination. If you want something that watered down, just drink some tea, for heaven’s sake.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Roto13

      I recoiled in horror and disgust. I use that much for my one (double sized) cup I have in the morning.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 8:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Jazzgirl205

      You have not had my tea. It receives high praise form Russian Jews and Australians. It is the tea version of Greek coffee.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 10:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   JoDa

      True to both Kermit and Jazz. Both coffee and tea should be potent potables.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   TheBrothOfBeans

      “Those who say there’s nothing like a nice cup of tea for calming the nerves, never had real tea. It’s like a syringe of adrenaline straight to the heart.” – Cheshire Cat (in American Mcgee’s Alice)

      Mar 13, 2014 at 3:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   Silbakor

      They seem to misunderstand that a lighter roast coffee is not made by simply using fewer grounds or putting water into darker coffee.

      Kermit is right, the lighter roasts have more caffeine, so the “rest of us tech guys prefer a cup of coffee that will actually wake us up” comment is just ignorant.

      We don’t know the size of their scoop, however, so we don’t know how much three scoops actually contains.

      Jun 17, 2014 at 1:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   Kacky

    What a bimbo. A lighter roast gives the brew more caffeine, but doesn’t change the strength.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   Ruby

    I would have left the last note as the first note. Isn’t it just better when we all just get along? (Yes, I am a PA Note Writer… sorry.)

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   Derp

    Just gonna go ahead and point out that Starbucks’ Blonde roast is named so only because it’s not roasted as much and is less acidic. It is actually the most caffeinated blend they have. People drinking it because they want a ‘lighter’ or ‘milder’ coffee, take note. It’s only the flavor that’s light.

    Source: I used to work at Starbucks.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   Bothered Barista

    GAH!!!!! Blonde roast is not brewed any weaker! Light roasts are stronger than dark. How many times must this be explained? Why must people that know nothing about the roasting/brewing of coffee insist that they know best? Sure, sure, you’re entitled to your own preference, but don’t try to dictate an industry you have no role in!

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   The Elf

      At least one more time. I don’t think people get it yet.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 8:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   FeRD bang

      If it makes you feel any better, BB (or at least makes you feel like you’re in good company), one of the side-effects of the Dunning-Kruger Effect is that people who know nothing or next-to-nothing about anything will insist that they know best, when discussing that topic.

      You think you’ve got it bad, try being in IT. You would not believe how many helpful computer tips I’m treated to in the average week! Everyone from Baristas to Barbers to Bouncers to Barristers to Bricklayers to Biochemists.

      And the real fuck of it is, in such a broad discipline, when it comes to some particular topics one of them damn well could know more than me!

      (It’s true. I’m not the best person to ask if you’re having problems watching NetFlix streams on your iPad, because I use neither of those things and really don’t give a shit. Have you tried turning it off and on again? Have you tried asking me to fix it for you, then hovering to pepper me with “helpful” suggestions? Of course you have.)

      Mar 11, 2014 at 4:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.3   GhostWriter bang

      The Dunning-Kruger Effect is really more of a skill-based effect rather than a knowledge-based one. As you’ve stated, unskilled people often lack the ability to recognize true skill, however, most people who are truly ignorant (i.e., lacking knowledge) on a topic do realize it.

      …and I hate to break it to the baristas here, but brewing coffee is basically a knowledge-based activity.

      Jun 17, 2014 at 3:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   edr

    coffee with more water in it doesn’t have more caffiene. Morons. Maybe Starbucks blonde roast does, but the lightness comes in the fact that it’s a lighter roast. The lightness that the stupid office bitch makes is because she adds less coffee.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 5:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   jill

    It was always the same argument at my family’s house growing up. My parents like theirs with the grounds filled up to the brim for a whole pot, which resulted in super strong, jet black coffee that gets burnt tasting super fast, while I, along with my siblings like ours made with the suggested amount, and a normal strength..not weak. I agree with the last note leaver…you can just add some hot water to dilute it if its too strong, and then mix it how you like (or have it black), without having to use too much creamer. But if its too weak (as a former co-worker used to like making coffee tinted hot water…blech), there is nothing you can do to make it stronger. I just loathe people who feel as if everyone around them have to accommodate their wishes at all times…compromise is necessary in life. Unless it is directly harming you personally, just shut up and quietly make your own adjustments as needed, without having to announce it to the world when you do so.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   jill

      But, I just have to add, that despite Starbuck’s raging popularity, I cannot see how people like it. The coffee tastes terrible. When I stayed at a friend’s house, and she only kept Starbucks ground coffee in the house, I had to buy a little bag of grocery store brand or tim horton’s ground coffee to make separately, because I just cannot tolerate Starbuck’s over-roasted, burnt beans flavor, no matter how weak or strong you make it. Gross.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 6:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   kermit

      People who like Tim Horton’s coffee generally don’t like Starbucks.

      Just like people who think Cheese Whiz or Kraft Slices is real cheese don’t like the real deal you can get at a cheesemonger. If it’s not what you’re used to of course you don’t like it.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   jill

      I’m an equal opportunity enjoyer when it comes to coffee. I like timmy’s…but can enjoy Seattle’s Best, Millstone, or even Cafe Bustelo…I like several different regions and varieties. But when it comes to Starbucks, no matter what region they claim it is, what kind of roast, etc…it all tastes the same to me, and it all tastes nasty. Perhaps its their roasting technique or something? And as far as cheese goes, if it’s dyed oil and fat, and has to be called a ‘cheese flavored food product’, and someone enjoys that, they probably shouldn’t claim they like cheese at all.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.4   Jami

      StarYucks is gross for two reasons.

      1: They purposely burn their beans. Which is disgusting.

      2: They use the cheaper, inferior Arabica beans instead of the far superior Colombian beans.

      While they come from the same country (I saw this in a PBS special on coffee) Arabica beans are grown in the low lands and are picked BEFORE the beans are ripe. They ripen in a warehouse.

      Colombian beans grow up high in the mountains and ripen on the bush.

      Think about it. People pay extra for vine ripened tomatoes because they taste better than ones picked before they’re ripe. Why shouldn’t the same hold true for coffee?

      So cheap beans + burning them on purpose = nasty ass coffee that people only buy because they think it makes them look hip and trendy.

      StarYucks is the coffee equivalent of wearing horribly painful, extremely high heel shoes simply because they’re a designer brand.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 12:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.5   Nonsense

      Coffea arabica is a species of coffee, it is actually the highest grade of coffee bean, and is more expensive. The other is Coffea robusta, which is used mostly for making instant coffee. Not sure where you got the Columbian thing from, all coffee comes from Asia or Africa originally, and is grown (both species) in numerous countries around the world.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 8:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.6   kermit

      *comes to startling realization that the Internet self-regulates without me*

      Mar 10, 2014 at 8:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.7   Jami

      Same plant, Kermit, but the conditions of growing and picking are what makes them different. Which is why Colombian is superior. It’s lower in acidic content for one thing. Which makes it taste way, WAY better than the cheap stuff that StarYucks buys.

      Google “Difference Between Arabica and Colombian Coffee” and you’ll find a slew of pages on it. And they all say the same thing – Colombian is superior.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.8   kermit


      Oh, so close and yet so far…

      Mar 10, 2014 at 10:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.9   TKD

      Kermit, I feel your pain!

      Mar 10, 2014 at 10:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.10   Jordan

      Seattelite here. Just have to point out that Seattle’s Best is technically a Starbucks off-shoot.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 11:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.11   kermit

      TKD –

      Internet enlightenment is just one XKCD cartoon away.

      I don’t know if links upset the spam filter gremlin, so: xkcd [dot] com/1238

      Mar 10, 2014 at 2:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.12   assiveProgressive

      I wish we had Tim Horton’s around here. I love the stuff. Do not malign it.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 4:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.13   JoDa

      Yeah, Kermit, I rescind my earlier agreement. I tend to drink a mix of fine coffees (I’m partial to some Vietnamese varieties (we travel there for work so I can usually hit a coworker up to bring me some when I haven’t been over in a while), but love a good Kona or Blue Mountain), and Starsucks is crapoola.

      When I’m forced to drink the ‘sucks, I commit the sacrilege of putting milk in it. The good stuff I drink black, as the good lord intended.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.14   uncreative

      As someone who enjoys Starbucks coffee, I can give a pretty simple reason why I do – I like coffee-flavored dessert drinks, which is something Starbucks seems to do quite well. When I first tried coffee, I said I didn’t like it. Then my sister made me a cup with a bunch of milk and sugar, and I went, oh, this actually tastes good. I don’t like black coffee. I do like things like milkshakes made with coffee ice cream. I like coffee as a flavoring. I like cinnamon lattes. You don’t need high quality coffee when coffee is one flavor mixed in with a bunch of sugar and milk. And I really don’t see anything wrong with enjoying that other than it’s not hip or snobby. I’m glad fancy coffees exist for those who like them. I can understand that, as I am quite fond of some teas. But I also respect that some people just like crap tea with a ton of sugar in it and iced, even though I hate sweetened tea and much prefer a good blend of tea. It doesn’t make me better though that I will sometimes brew a fine cup from loose-leaf; it makes me somebody with different personal taste in beverages.

      Mar 12, 2014 at 3:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   az

    Strong vs. Weak and Dark vs. Light are not synonymous comparisons.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   The Elf

      Absolutely true. The light side of coffee is not weak, just passionless. I gave in to my hate and went to the dark side of the cup long ago.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 8:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Tracey C

    It sounds like all of these people are getting way too much caffeine.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   Lita bang

    And this is why I don’t drink coffee, besides the fact that it tastes like death to me.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Sir Puke

      I try coffee every 15 years, just to be sure that I don’t like the taste.
      My next attempt is scheduled for 2022.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.2   Lita bang

      If you’d like me to bring lots of other beverages to wash away the death taste, I will join you in said attempt.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.3   The Beast Among Us

      Amen to that. The only thing I ever get at a Starbuck’s is the Vanilla Créme Frappuccino, which doesn’t have any coffee in it at all. And, I only have one if someone buys it for me. I’m not spending $6.00 for a milkshake.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 12:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.4   L

      Diary Queen has a thing called a MooLatte. It’s basically a SLIGHTLY coffee flavoured milkshake.

      I like that.

      Other than that… eh, nah.

      Mar 27, 2014 at 4:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   Nick

    The comment defending Starbucks coffee is ridiculous. McDonald’s is also one of the most successful companies worldwide, but if you want good food that’ll be the last place on earth you need to be. Same goes for the shitty coffee they serve at Starbucks.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   kermit

      Their espresso isn’t all that bad, but a LOT depends on the baristas and if they know what they’re doing.

      I do give Starbucks credit though for popularizing the notion that it’s okay to ask for something other than the brown swill made in a drip coffee maker.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   Lita bang

      Amusingly enough, I have it on very good authority (my mother the coffee fiend) that McD’s has better coffee than Starbucks…

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   Lil'

      I don’t know much about the coffee at the Starbucks store (I’ve only ever had their white chocolate mocha), but I love the packaged coffee grounds. We mix the Starbucks mocha flavor grounds with Gevalia traditional roast grounds. Add a little heavy cream and sugar…GOOD MORNING! However, I know that someone somewhere else in the world is reading this and rolling their eyes at me for thinking I have a GOOD cup of coffee. Oh well, there are always critics. We can’t get good pizza outside of New York/Chicago, we can’t get good cheese steaks outside of Philly, and apparently we can’t good coffee anywhere in the USA. Thing is, we live where we live. We work with what we’ve got. It’s what we know and we are allowed to like it.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 11:11 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   The Beast Among Us

      Try The Pie in Salt Lake City and then tell me if you still can’t get good pizza outside of New York and Chicago.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 12:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.5   assiveProgressive

      Nastiest chain coffee is Dunkin Donuts. I used to like it, but lately it seems so very, very bitter.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 4:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.6   The Beast Among Us

      ^ It’s also the nastiest donut chain.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 6:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   Uncle Bobby

    I too prefer light roasts and agree with the complainer. The techies got it wrong in their reasoning and think that acidic, almost burnt coffee is delivers more jolt…it doesn’t.

    Starbucks IS shitty coffee though.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 6:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Bothered Barista

      Good point. Except that the original complaint had nothing to do with the roast of the grinds but only addressed the concentration of grinds:water. The techies were right in that more water/less grinds=more diluted/less caffeinated coffee.
      I too prefer light roasts, specifically because I can brew them “swampwater” strong and still have a delicious cup of coffee. Yet I have also met folks who prefer a weakly brewed dark roast. To each there own, provided the following axiom is respected:
      A light brew and a light roast are two different things.

      Mar 9, 2014 at 7:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   Nicole

    What I find so amusing about this is that adding more scoops of grounds does not define whether a coffee is a light or a dark roast. That is determined by how dark the beans are roasted. Adding more scoops adds to the strength of the flavor.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 7:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Alicia

      Despite how many of us drink it, most Americans don’t know all that much about coffee, how it’s picked, how it’s roasted, what those things mean, and how to brew it. It’s one reason we spend an insane amount of money paying other people to make us coffee that is still subpar.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 1:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   Mike

    Coffee is, like wine, dependent on many variables, including context. I love a strong, deep, complex cup – but hate the over-extracted, boil mess at Starbucks. But let me tell you of one of the best cups of coffee I have ever tasted. We were getting ready to be picked up after a 5 day ambush mission. No fire, nothing hot for 5 days. We entered the extraction landing zone as the sun was just getting ready to pop up over the horizon, with the word that the choppers were less than 10 minutes out. I decided it was time for a cup of coffee. I used a worn tee shirt as a filter to strain some Viet Nam swamp water into an aluminum canteen cup. That got the twigs, leaves, bugs, and frogs out. A couple of Halzone tablets took care of the little things. A chunk of C-4 explosive the size of the end of my thumb brought the water to a boil. Two packs of instant, originally packaged for Korea 20 years earlier, and I had coffee. I sat and enjoyed the sunrise, and my coffee, until the choppers came in. A few months ago my wife and I sat in a New Orleans style bistro enjoying beignets and a wonderful cup of coffee. I shared the story with her. I am not sure which cup of coffee I enjoyed more.

    Mar 9, 2014 at 10:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Dane Zeller

      Mike, right you are. The smallest amount of context can seriously affect the taste. Thanks for the story.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   Jami

    So for awhile I was in charge of making coffee at work. It rarely gets made now as the majority of coffee drinkers are gone and almost everyone prefers tea.

    One day when I walked in after a day off one of the librarians informed me she had tried to make coffee while I was gone. She used 11 scoops. She had never made coffee before, apparently.

    So I posted how we do coffee in our house.

    For one full pot 3 3/4ths heaping scoops. (And these are big scoops. Not the tiny ones that come with coffee anymore. So the basket is almost, but not quite, full.)

    A quick shake of salt – not too much, just enough to bring out the flavor.

    A tiny bit – less than 1/4th of a teaspoon – of pre-sweetened hot chocolate/cocoa mix. This takes off the bitter edge.

    And that’s how coffee’s made in my house.

    I wish though that mom would use my vintage Corningware percolator instead of the Mr. Coffee. Coffee tastes so much better when percolated rather than that nasty Mr. Coffee mess.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 1:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   JoDa

      Actually, percolators do a terrible job of making quality coffee, though they probably tie with a cheap, poorly-maintained drip machine. If you want a damn fine cup of coffee, get a french press and an electric tea kettle. Bonus, you can make just enough for yourself in the office.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.2   Sam

      In my experience the only good coffee in London is ironically only at cafes owned by Aussies or NZers.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 12:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.3   Jazzgirl205

      Yes, Jamie, Percolators do make the best coffee. I would never trade my 20 yo Faberware electric percolator for anything. I’ve had coffee by all different methods and percolators are by far the best. You would not believe all the compliments I get from guests concerning my coffee.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 9:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   James

    What a nightmare you are all having. I don’t know why but over here in the UK coffee machines and decent coffee don’t seem to have taken off. We have a kettle and a jar of coffee in our works kitchen and I’ve given up training people how to use them properly and now just make my own coffee. Maybe you should all think about that?

    Mar 10, 2014 at 4:11 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   TRT

      Mellow Birds. Says it all for the UK coffee industry really. Having said that… I don’t drink coffee – can’t stand the stuff – gives me the runs.
      But the one thing I can say is I know how all my roasted bean drinking friends take their coffee… f***ing seriously.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 5:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.2   KAJ

      You need a cafetiere. Cheap, portable and makes a great cup of coffee.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 5:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.3   FOZ

      Yer, thanks for the mental image of you running off to ride the porcelain pony.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 7:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.4   assiveProgressive

      TRT must be the one who drank coffee, went for a morning jog and then ducked behind an AC unit

      Mar 10, 2014 at 4:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.5   Sam

      In my experience the only good coffee in London is ironically only at cafes owned by Aussies or NZers.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 12:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.6   Jazzgirl205

      Don’t feel bad. You really can’t get a decent pot of tea in the US. That’s why I never order it out unless it is in a tearoom run by Brits. I am very picky about how my tea is brewed and have trained my dh and dd on how to do it correctly.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 9:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.7   The Elf

      …. jar of coffee? You mean instant? Dissolveable granules?

      I’ll drink instant if it is what’s available. Any port in a caffeine deprived storm, you know. But it just can’t compare with, well, any other method.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 9:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.8   TRT

      *whistles and looks nonchalantly around at nuttin’ in particular*

      Mar 12, 2014 at 4:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.9   L

      Instant coffee grounds are actually great to add to brownie batter.

      Mar 27, 2014 at 4:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   Caroline

    Ugh, American coffee…

    Mar 10, 2014 at 6:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   sharon

    Patrick himself is passive-aggressive, “a cup of coffee that will actually wake us up.” Tool.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 7:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   Flabbon

    Why are coffee drinkers so friggin’ pretentious?

    Mar 10, 2014 at 7:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Iwill FindU

      It’s the caffeine withdrawn that happens when they can’t get a good cup of coffee. Not that I drink coffee but I’m pretty sure my hubby bleeds the stuff.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 11:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   buni

    This is why my office bought a Keurig. The salesmen can drink their pot of burnt mud from the coffee maker that hasn’t been drained and cleaned in who knows how long and the rest of us can enjoy a variety of roasts and flavors made just how we like it.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 9:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   The Elf

      The Keurig – or any of the single-cup machines – is truly the way to go in the shared coffee setting. Your brew, your way, shut the hell up about everyone else’s.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 8:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.2   buni

      Though, there is one woman in my office who doesn’t “believe in” flavored coffee, doesn’t think anyone should drink it and gives the person who orders the k-cups a hard time about it. The rest of us wish she’d STFU and let us enjoy our mocha, blueberry, hazelnut, etc. Some people just look for stuff to complain about.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 9:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.3   The Elf

      Does she have to pay for it? If so, she has a small point. Just a small one, though, and one quickly eliminated if it’s a group money pool and the majority of the group digs flavors. If not, then WTF? Just pick another pod!

      Mar 11, 2014 at 9:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.4   Lil'

      Our office complainers are sorry now. Our company used to furnish the k-cups and brew coffee. No one was ever satisfied with the brands or flavors we ordered. So we talked to the vendor about sampling new flavors and they brought in a fancy new Flavia machine with flavors like Milky Way and options like cappuccinos. It was great. The thing is, the GM never took notice of how much we were spending on coffee each year until the demo price comparison. Not only did the Flavia get shot down, but he discontinued the k-cups. He had me trot over to Sam’s and pick up a Keurig machine so that people could bring in their own cups (our old machine was furnished by the coffee supplier as long as we ordered the cups). Oddly enough, now that everyone has to bring in their own k-cups, the Folders brew is suddenly much more satisfying.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 10:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.5   buni

      Elf, The company pays for the coffee. It doesn’t cost the employees anything, at least not directly. I have no idea what the coffee budget is; we only have one bean-counter on the payroll and so far, he’s not complaining.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 12:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.6   The Elf

      Then she needs to a lesson in kwitcyerbitchen. It’s *free*.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 1:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.7   assiveProgressive

      Lil, our company has a Flavia machine, but you have to pay for it yourself, and it is $1.20. Which sucks, but at least the machine is clean and there is nobody griping about who bought creamer last, etc.

      Mar 12, 2014 at 1:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   NexliB

    I hope she doesn’t seriously think 3 scoops makes a good cup of coffee. Might as well just dip a brown crayon in some hot water.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 9:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   helen-louise

    I love how all of the amendments which would normally be written on post-it notes are typed – to avoid incriminating handwriting?

    Mar 10, 2014 at 9:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   The Elf

      It’s because after a cups of the strong coffee, the weak coffee drinkers have the shakes. And after downing multiple cups of the weak stuff trying vainly to feed the beast, the strong coffee drinkers have raging headaches and can’t write straight.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 8:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   Shirley

    And not one person mentions the best coffee ever, Blue Mountain coffee from Jamaica. Once you have had Blue Mountain coffee every other coffee suffers by comparison.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 11:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   Snicklefritz

      Any idea where you can get it at a price that doesn’t eat up your entire food budget? Sam’s club had it for a while, but alas, it’s no more. The wailing from my household could be heard from space when they stopped carrying it

      Mar 10, 2014 at 3:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.2   kermit

      They carry it at Costco, 2lb for $106.
      Alternatively, you can order it from the Blue Mountain website directly, 5lb for $165.

      Haven’t had Blue Mountain, but Lavazzo from Italy is pretty good. For the pure Arabica, the price is about $14/lb.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 7:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.3   Lil'

      Lucky me! I have a friend going back to visit her family in Jamaica on Wednesday. She gets it cheap there from a store owner who cuts her a deal because she buys so much merchandise from him every trip. She is hooking me up. Go me!

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.4   JoDa

      It’s cheap in Jamaica, as Lil’ mentioned. Otherwise, yeah, $40-50/lb. is normal. I can indulge in these things because it’s just me…I can’t imagine the expense for a whole family.

      Mar 10, 2014 at 9:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.5   assiveProgressive

      When I think of going to Jamaica to buy stuff, funny, I don’t think of coffee

      Mar 10, 2014 at 11:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   The Beast Among Us

    These people drink way too much coffee. Perhaps if they stopped drinking coffee, their PANs would be more “to the point” and aggressive.

    Mar 10, 2014 at 11:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   Madrias

      Trust me, you don’t wanna see a coffee addict without coffee. Someone WILL get stabbed with a pen or whacked with a stapler. Or a monitor to the face.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 1:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.2   The Beast Among Us

      I’ve seen how they are, and I’ve learned how to handle a knife just in case our office coffee machine breaks again. But, one week, and the withdrawal symptoms disappear and they are okay after that, not realizing they never really “needed” that morning cup.

      Mar 11, 2014 at 1:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   MustacheHam

    Throughout my years in the office with a shared coffee machine, I have never witness such a dispute (quite childish) over brewing choices.

    Get a Keurig folks if you want something different per person. ;)

    Mar 10, 2014 at 9:14 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   wheatless

    I can easily see how this would happen in Wisconsin. I think there’s a different interpretation of coffee there than, say, here in New England. During my first visit to my now in-laws in the midwest:

    MIL: “Good morning!There’s coffee on.”
    In my sleepy state, I wander over to the coffee pot and pour myself a mug full. I look into the mug, and I can still see the bottom of the mug through the tinted liquid.
    wheatless: “Wait. What is this? Is this tea?”
    FIL: “No, it’s coffee, silly.”
    wheatless: “Are you sure?” [takes sip] “Y’know, maybe I’ll just have some tea instead.”

    Mar 12, 2014 at 11:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   deprogrammed

    Color and caffeine are two different things. Flavor and caffeine are two different things. However, the more dark roast you add, the more caffeine you get, along with the darker color that people mistake for caffeine. Therefore, coffee syrup will have more caffeine than a normal pot of morning blend – it will also melt your spoon, put hair on the palms of your hands and make you speak in tongues – if your tongue survives.

    Mar 12, 2014 at 2:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   Lillie

      I drink Montavida and use the reuseable cups for my Keuriq. This coffee is the best I have ever drank. I can’t tolerate caffeine, therefore was reluctant to try it, but I did, because I observed weight-loss in a family member, after they had been drinking it! It has a very smooth taste, no caffeine jitters and energy to boot! No. I don’t sell it, but you can buy or get a sample at MzVirtue Technologies site, click on products for info. Best coffee, ever! I love it!

      Mar 12, 2014 at 4:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.2   assiveProgressive

      Sounds good that it has reusable cups. I hate the waste of packaging in Keurig cups

      Mar 13, 2014 at 12:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Carl

    Certain big name coffees may be strong, but mainly their beans are over-roasted to the point of being charcoal in look and bitter to the taste. Fresh coffee should never have a bitter taste.

    The best coffee is home roasted. Full City+ to Full French Roast is my preference. Beyond that is nearing charcoal territory. With the right bean though, I have been able to get a caramel corn taste at City Roast level.

    Jun 8, 2014 at 7:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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