Scapegoat of the Sea

May 12th, 2014 · 35 comments

Joanna in Boston says this started with “have a blessed day,” and has continued to escalate from there.

Please wash sink when you dump food, especially tuna fish. It reeks. HAVE A BLESSED DAY! Three most wanted tuna offenders. I feel discriminated against. I have good taste. Please note: Mary did not write this note. Mary is not passive-aggressive.  -Mary

related: Fish cookies, anyone?

FILED UNDER: Boston · fish · office · public shaming · rebuttals


35 responses so far ↓

  • #1   magicdomino

    Is it passive-aggressive to leave a note saying that you are not passive-aggressive?

    Incidently, it isn’t a very blessed day for the tuna.

    May 13, 2014 at 3:43 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   FeRD bang

      Is it passive-aggressive? IS IT???

      …Oh, sorry, the answer to your question is: Yes. Yes, it is.

      (In fact, I suspect Mary probably meant her note as a joke, for exactly that reason. Well done, Mary. We Are Mildly Amused.)

      May 13, 2014 at 4:25 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   The Elf

      Oh, Mary. If you didn’t want people to think the original note was yours you should probably stop distributing chick tracts to your coworkers who don’t attend your weekly Bible study in the break room.

      May 14, 2014 at 7:19 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   pooham

    Holy Mackerel!

    May 13, 2014 at 4:03 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   pooham

    Tuna Offender’s what?

    May 13, 2014 at 4:04 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   FeRD bang

      …mugshots? Wait, no, that would be “offenders’.”

      I got nothin’.

      May 13, 2014 at 4:26 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   kermit

      The tuna offender’s picture(s). That tuna fish is wearing a hat and glasses, so he can’t see too well and is therefore easily offended by one of those suspects.

      May 13, 2014 at 8:24 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Dave

    Who left the tuna in the sink? Ask the next Mermaid you happen to see…

    May 13, 2014 at 6:33 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   TGIF

      Wait- is it chicken or fish???

      May 14, 2014 at 4:35 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Lita bang

    Oh for cod’s sake. I don’t have time to deal with this carp. I’m fin-ished, and you’re all a bunch of bass-tards.

    Sorry. I guess I really can’t resist a good line.

    May 13, 2014 at 9:30 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Geek Goddess

      Your shrimpy little jokes make me crabby.

      May 13, 2014 at 10:51 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   The Elf

      I’m sure that was unintentional, Geek Goddess. Lita throws out puns for the halibut.

      May 14, 2014 at 7:21 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Lil'

      I guess she’s flounder calling.

      May 14, 2014 at 8:35 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   Lita bang

      I just can’t resist them! I guess I’m hooked…I’m really sunk.

      May 14, 2014 at 8:33 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Elle

      Those puns were terrible – you clearly have no sole.

      May 17, 2014 at 12:44 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   Lil'

      Whale then, we should just eeliminate this whole thread.

      May 17, 2014 at 8:49 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.7   Lil'

      Whale then, we should just eeliminate this whole thread.

      May 17, 2014 at 8:49 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.8   Lita bang

      I’m impressed, this has reached a scale I never could have imagined.

      May 17, 2014 at 5:57 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.9   assiveProgressive

      Something fishy is going on here. It’s a good thing I’m not shelling out a lot of clams to perch on this page. I don’t want to go overboard by casting a wide net, so I’ll shut my lobster trap now.

      May 18, 2014 at 10:20 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Nahhh bang

    Charlie Tuna is such a hipster.

    May 14, 2014 at 12:02 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   infanttyrone

    Sole music for tuna hipsters…just for da halibut…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSlXIYjTdFo

    You thought it would be something about crustaceans by the B-52′s ?

    May 14, 2014 at 12:36 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   assiveProgressive

    Now the kitchenette tyrants want people to ”wash” the sink? Somebody has a tin of Bumblebee in their bonnet

    May 14, 2014 at 12:54 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Poltergeist

    My tuna fish brings all the notes to the yahd.

    May 14, 2014 at 4:10 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   The Elf

    You have to wonder how bad the reek possibly could be in the post-lunch hour. Was it attracting stray cats?

    May 14, 2014 at 7:22 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Kasaba

    Better the sink smell like tuna, than the person eating tuna at the desk next to you.

    May 14, 2014 at 7:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   TRT

    I would buy dolphin friendly tuna, but fair’s fair… I’ve never heard of a tuna friendly dolphin.

    May 14, 2014 at 7:46 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Tesselara

      Dolphin are friendly to tuna the same way that lions are friendly to gazelle. :)

      May 14, 2014 at 11:21 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   warns

    Don’t eat gross smelling things in common areas, people. Don’t dump tuna in the sink, don’t microwave straight cauliflower or fish sticks (all things that have smelled up entire office floors in my history.)

    If you MUST eat these things, and you don’t live in antarctica, you can probably eat/dispose of that where the rest of the building doesn’t have to smell about it.

    May 14, 2014 at 5:24 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   assiveProgressive

      I didn’t get the cauliflower memo. Guess I’ll have to start eating human brains instead

      May 15, 2014 at 12:11 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Charlotte

      I didn’t realise cauliflower smells either, I’ve always thought it was one of the least smelly (or flavoured) vegeables.

      May 15, 2014 at 9:44 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   rushgirl2112

      Uh, cauliflower is known for being stinky. Just Google “cauliflower smell” if you don’t believe me.

      I love the stuff, but it does stink when you cook it.

      May 18, 2014 at 11:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   assiveProgressive

    Truth be told, I didn’t dump any tuna in the sink. I was rinsing out my panties.

    May 15, 2014 at 10:59 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Lab dude

    Since The Tuna Offenders’ are in Boston (right across the river from Cambridge (our fair city) ) they could very well be related to the trash offender who has been haunting my hallways.

    I place my trash pails out in the hall nightly for emptying. Most days I arrive the next day to find my trash pails clean and empty – except for those odd days when persons unknown have dropped random pieces of potentially stinky food & food waste: empty yogurt containers, banana peels, apple cores, etc.
    Seriously?

    May 15, 2014 at 12:07 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     

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