On Wednesdays we wear pink

June 5th, 2014 · 74 comments

Our submitter in Chicago found these notes were in her son’s 8th grade autograph book. “Only a few other students are going to the same high school that my son will be attending,” she writes. “These two girls are part of that group and seem eager to get on to the next year of flame-throwing. I thought the heart was a nice, passive-aggressive touch.”

Adds our submitter: “The weird thing is that these girls both appear to be so nice and docile in person.”

I don't really like you much so don't really have much fun in high school. Hope I don't see you at L.P. -Jessie   We are both going to L P so I am glad you didn't choose drama. I hope you are different in high school. Then maybe we could be friends. -Ileana

related: So much for “Have a nice summer, see you next  year”

FILED UNDER: Chicago · heart · mean girls · schools & teachers · way harsh


74 responses so far ↓

  • #1   FeRD bang

    Sing along everybody!

    “You know, I wish that I had Jessie’s bitchface.
    Yeah, I want Jessie’s bitchface!
    Where can I learn how to bitch out like that?”

    (I guess the answer is: The drama program at L░░░░░ P░░░! Ileana will be there, honing her skills. I’m sure she’ll go right to the head of the class. We expect great things from young Ileana.)

    Jun 5, 2014 at 12:05 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

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      Jun 14, 2014 at 3:07 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   mcap247

    Dear Jessie and Ileana. I hope you both get pregnant in high school, gain 100 pounds, and end up with only the love of your pets because no one wants to be around you.
    <3

    Jun 5, 2014 at 12:09 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   kermit

      And spend their time writing over the top mean comments about teenagers on the Internet?

      Anybody with a decent sense of self-awareness realizes that they were an ahole during their early teenage years. And that realization makes them *gasp* change.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 12:58 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Marie

      Dang though, I may have been a bit of a biddy, but I never outright wrote a nasty comment in someone’s memory book. Take it to the 10 year reunion, kid. Hey guys, remember when you were both huge bungholes? Good times, amiright?

      Jun 5, 2014 at 10:19 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   kermit

      Marie, that’s exactly why no amount of booze, chocolate, cheese or boxes of puppies could ever entice me to go to a school reunion.

      You’re already keeping in touch with people you like and/or were friends with. So the only reason to go is to gloat about how people you either didn’t know or didn’t like turned out. I’m sorry, but life is too short for this kind of petty schadenfreude.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 12:13 am   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   The Elf

      Oh. Hell. Yeah. That’s why I’ve never gone to a HS reunion either. I already keep touch with people I care about, and that’s enough.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 8:46 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Marie

      “Marie, that’s exactly why no amount of booze, chocolate, cheese or boxes of puppies could ever entice me to go to a school reunion.”

      That’s two of us. I cannot think of one person that I don’t talk to on social media or over the phone regularly that I’d want to see and pretend that I remember fondly. The point was that I got to not see them for x years, and that’s been working out okay. I have enough people to feign civility with at work.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 7:59 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   clem

    And I’m sure her son is an absolute angel, right?

    Jun 5, 2014 at 12:15 pm   rating: 52  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Roto13

      Yeah, I kind of want to know what the motivation behind these comments is.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 12:25 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   The Beast Among Us

      It’s either his constant sexual harassment, or his misogyny that provoked these comments. I’m guessing.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 1:47 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   JoneyJava

      There’s a difference between not getting on and writing mean bitchy messages. I’m guessing they consider themselves more popular than him or they wouldn’t have the guts to write those kind of messages.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 2:31 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   Chairmanofthebored

      The Beast: or they could be gratuitously bullying him. Without a context, it’s impossible to know.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 10:10 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   Iwill FindU

      I don’t know that all teens are total assholes. If I didn’t like someone and I got a hold of their year book I would just put something truly random like write in the middle of the book that it was the middle of the book or write as close the book spine as I could that I had just written in their “crack” along with, have a good summer/year and my name. For my friends I would draw a random and elaborate picture. Not liking someone doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a lesser person. My mother did her best to raise respectful children.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 8:04 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   kermit

      Just because somebody doesn’t write a mean comment in a yearbook doesn’t mean that they’re not an ahole. Most aholes I knew would refuse to sign it altogether.

      The early teen years are hard for everybody, especially if you live in a multicultural community. It’s hard learning to read people’s social cues even without that multicultural aspect. To some, teasing, namecalling and making them uncomfortable is the way to show somebody that you like them. Yet that is very easy to misinterpret that and take it that the person doesn’t like you at all because that’s also the behavior of people who genuinely don’t like you.

      If any of this stuff was easy to figure out – thus making it easy to be a good person – then all the teen magazines devoted to this stuff wouldn’t exist and nobody would be making money off of teenage insecurity.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 9:41 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   Jami

      Might be no reason. I had boys TAKE my yearbooks from me to write notes about how I was a whale even though I never did anything to them except exist. And the teachers got mad at me for being mad about it. Hell, they didn’t even make the boys give the books back until after they “signed” them.

      Jun 7, 2014 at 12:47 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   The Elf

      Sign or not sign, girl’s fault or boy’s….. I think we can agree on one thing: Kids can be cruel little shits.

      Jun 7, 2014 at 8:54 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.9   betty lou

      Jami – wow, that’s awful.

      When I was in high school, a boy in one of my classes had been a total jerk all semester, but suddenly got nice toward the end of the year. While I was in the middle of writing something nice in his yearbook, he reverted to his old behavior and made some sexist/misogynist remark. I was so pissed off that I crossed out the nice comments and wrote something nasty. I don’t recall exactly what he said or what I wrote, but a few days later I was called into the principal’s office because this kid’s mother had seen what I wrote and wanted me to buy him a new yearbook, because I “ruined” it with my nasty comment. At that point, I still recalled his exact words that provoked me, and when I repeated them to his mother and the principal, I was let off the hook. Not that two wrongs make a right, but whatever.

      Jun 8, 2014 at 12:39 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.10   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Ileana’s comment didn’t seem mean at all. It seemed pretty constructive, actually.

      Aug 1, 2014 at 7:10 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Megan

    Little bitches!!!

    Jun 5, 2014 at 12:25 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Lil'

      I’m not so sure he didn’t ask for it.

      Jun 10, 2014 at 11:12 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Nocturnesthesia

      Could be, but my experience makes me think it more likely that the son just happens to be “that kid”. I was “that kid” and got shit on constantly from kindergarten right up to college, comments like this (and much worse) were a daily occurrence. There is not always a reason for it – it’s like prison, once one popular kid/alpha male/whatever takes a dislike to you, the rest pile on to fit in and it never stops. Sometimes it’s something relatively obvious that causes it (being too smart, too stupid, poor, smelly or greasy, a loner, overweight, bad at sports, having non-mainstream interests, not following fads, etc) but oftentimes it’s just random and if the kid being shat on changes whatever they get picked on for the bullies will just find (or invent) something else.

      Of course the son might just be a dick, but from what I know about school aged kids, that’s probably not it.

      Jun 10, 2014 at 10:52 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   notolaf

      Eighth grade is the most bitchy age for girls. Chances are that these two are just mean.

      Jun 18, 2014 at 9:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Maybe you were a jerk, Nocturnesthesia. I was “that kid” too, and with hind sight I was a jerk. “That kid” usually is.

      Aug 1, 2014 at 7:11 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   GB

    I thought the first note was super bitchy, but then reading the second, and how she said she hoped he would be different and then they could maybe be friends, made me wonder what kind of a dick the boy is.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 12:27 pm   rating: 64  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   exchicagoan

    “L P” is *clearly* Lincoln Park, if I know snotty rich bitches and where they live.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 1:35 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   DS

      Also, if you can clearly see the words “Lincoln Park” underneath the blurred out bit, which you can.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 2:01 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Havingfitz

    Not enough information here to determine if the girls are just catty, or if the boy is, well, acting like a 14-year-old boy. They aren’t exactly known for their self-control or manners. Or maybe we’re all just reading too much into this and manufacturing drama where no drama exists.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 2:22 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   The Elf

      I agree – and it’s really up to the players in this little drama to say. And manufacturing drama where none exists is a speciality of both middle school kids and the internets.

      However, it wouldn’t shock me in the slightest if these were some bitchy girls bullying someone they think they aren’t going to ever see again. Certainly they colluded on it.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 7:14 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Hyacinth

    I didn’t like everybody in school, but I sure didn’t write them a note to tell them so. Even if he is a big PITA dork.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 2:57 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Melisa

      Yeah, I’m guessing the boy is probably extremely bad if not one, but two girls took the time to tell him how they feel.

      Jun 5, 2014 at 6:53 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   Chairmanofthebored

      It annoys me how everyone in the comments take for granted that the boy is to blame. He could be to blame, or he could be bullied by his classmates. or he could have had a row with the two girls two days before and they seized the opportunity to get back at him, or both could just be goofing around. We can’t know based on the information we have. But since boys are supposed to be rowdy and have poor impulse control, it must be the boy, right? (btw, I’m a she. And a feminist).

      Jun 6, 2014 at 10:17 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   Seanette

      In case you didn’t notice, anyone penis-equipped is automatically at fault when in a dispute with anyone possessing a vagina, according to political correctness. (Note: I’m female.)

      Jun 6, 2014 at 10:39 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   dd

      Oh yes because everyone said “It MUST be the boy!” not, “Huh, the way it’s worded makes me wonder…” and “Well we only have one side to this story”

      Then we get the opposite extremes where the tone is mocking and implying those over-zealous feminists are pointing their nasty fingers at the poor boys…
      come on here. If anyone’s sounding extreme here, it’s you.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 1:38 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   Iwill FindU

      I don’t much care for this blame the boy attitude. You can only control how you act, in this case two girls took the opportunity to act poorly and they are the ones at fault for their actions. Even IF they boy did act like a typical 14yr old boy causing the girls to dislike him, they had the choice to pass the book on with out writing anything at all. They didn’t do that.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 8:10 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   Tesselara

      Personally, this just sounds like middle school. A time that I try not to think very hard about. No idea what the back story is–certainly, calling the boy out in his yearbook is incredibly PA, jerky, and unkind. Who knows what the boy is like, but it doesn’t matter. Poor kid.

      Jun 7, 2014 at 7:08 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.7   The Elf

      The heart is the extra special PA touch. She’s gonna grow up to write a missive or two for roommates for sure.

      Jun 9, 2014 at 7:03 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   assiveProgressive

    I’ve kept my junior high and high school yearbooks. They finally are coming in handy as we’ve reached that age where we forget names, but at the same time folks are starting to die off at a pretty good clip.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 10:56 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Ajax

    Saying a prayer for compassion and maturity for all three.

    Jun 5, 2014 at 10:57 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   hbc

    Maybe this is incredibly naive, but the first one reads like a kid playing Opposite Day. The construction is just too awkward. I wouldn’t be surprised if the three of them (two girls and the submitter’s son) thought breaking the monotony of the notes was hilarious–after all, the submitter doesn’t know what he wrote in their books.

    I’d say stupid, pointless jabs at expectations are just about as frequent in middle school as snotty, mean behavior.

    Jun 6, 2014 at 4:29 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   tch tch

    I’m more worried about the quality of the handwriting. Sheeesh!

    Jun 6, 2014 at 7:24 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Zero Our Hero

    It’s sad to see a young man that is probably such a dick that girls would immortalize their aversion in a yearbook.
    It’s sadder to see young girls that harbor so much butthurt that they’d immortalize it in a yearbook.
    In the end, “L.P” loses because apparently, 3 douches are headed their way. It’s a tragedy.

    Jun 6, 2014 at 9:57 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   kermit

      Wasn’t some version of “Lincoln Park” the name of a a boy band some time ago?

      If those people were from the same Lincoln Park, I guess it’s understandable why the place gets such a reputation.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 12:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   The Elf

      You don’t mean “Linkin Park” do you? From the late 90s? Not the same thing. Not the same thing *at all*.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 2:26 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   kermit

      I’ll take your word for it, Elf. I am not familiar with boy bands because I value my hearing.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 2:55 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.4   The Elf

      Not a boy band, but it is a metal(ish) one. So you can still not know about it because you value your hearing!

      Jun 6, 2014 at 3:10 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Quite Contrary

    You hope I’m different in high school? Backatcha, bitch.

    Jun 6, 2014 at 12:54 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Kasaba

    In my school, people signed each other’s shirts when they left school. One kid a few grades down from me, very carefully signed my shirt “P.K.”, going over the letters a few times. When I asked what “P.K.” meant, he smiled deviously and said “poes klap”, and walked away. It’s the only message I remember from all the wonderfully florid/inane/stupid/insincere messages that covered my shirt. I think that kid knew, he’d cemented himself in my mind for life.

    Jun 6, 2014 at 1:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Lita bang

    I was a highly unpopular crotchfruit, and things like this are why I guarded my yearbook with the fury of a thousand suns. No one got to sign that thing. >:|

    Jun 6, 2014 at 1:04 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Lythande

      Things like this are the reasons I never got a yearbook (and when we had the “make your own in class” in the younger grades I didn’t bother trying to get signatures).

      Jun 6, 2014 at 5:58 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Lita bang

      Ours were mandatory. I think if we paid for school pictures (middle school) then we were also paying for the yearbook at the same time. I just remember I didn’t want the damn thing and got it forced on me anyway, sigh.

      Jun 6, 2014 at 8:39 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   assiveProgressive

      The few people who wrote in my yearbook would say that I’m quiet and nice. They might add weird or funny if they knew me a little better.

      Jun 7, 2014 at 11:13 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Lita bang

      Well, aP, I agree with all those assessments, so. :P

      Jun 8, 2014 at 2:25 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   assiveProgressive

      Ha, ha, yeah, Lita. I am going to have to dig those yearbooks out and see what they actually said. I do remember being in about the seventh grade, and this boy, who was cute but was maybe a D student, kept asking me one time if I liked “penis butter.” I kept thinking he had a lisp, and why would he care if I liked peanut butter. It took me forever to figure that one out. My point being, I got over it. The letter submitter should tear out that page, scribble over it, or buy some “correction fluid,” which they do still sell, even though nobody uses typewriters anymore.

      Jun 8, 2014 at 5:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Madrias

    As one who was bullied through the entirety of high school, I made sure no one signed my yearbook. I didn’t like anyone enough at that point to trust them, and after 4 years of cutting comments and snide remarks in person, I didn’t want to let anyone get a chance to immortalize their hatred of me in words.

    I don’t know why everyone is blaming the submitter’s child entirely. Sometimes people are assholes to others for no reason other than they were poor, or had a different hairstyle.

    Jun 6, 2014 at 2:21 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Tesselara

      Well, it’s not everyone who is blaming the submitter’s child. The wild speculation seems to vary from, “those horrible bitches” to “that uncontrolled asshole!” Then, there are those others–”middle school sucks” Personally, I’m in the third group.

      Jun 8, 2014 at 5:04 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Sue

    OK, so most of us are in agreement that these are rotten kids. But how rotten is this boy’s mother to be posting his humiliation on the internet? There’s a good chance Jessie and Ileana will stumble upon this post and share it with the whole school. Just what a freshman needs. Kinda reminds me of that after-school special where the mother hung the kid’s pee-pee stained sheets out the window for the whole neighborhood to see. But worse; there was no instagram back then.

    Jun 7, 2014 at 2:53 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Rory

      Why would they do that when it’s them that would look bad?

      Jun 30, 2014 at 6:17 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   LJ Chan

    My daughter had a boy draw not one but TWO penises in her freshman yearbook. I took pictures, sent the to the Dean, then whited them out. She was mortified, but she would have been more mortified when someday her children would come upon the book. They boy who drew the penises??? After scrubbing lockers for penis penance, graduated as a Natl Merit Scholar.

    Jun 7, 2014 at 11:38 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   LJ Chan

    My daughter had a boy draw not one but TWO penises in her freshman yearbook. I took pictures, sent them to the Dean, then whited them out. She was mortified, but she would have been more mortified when someday her children would come upon the book. They boy who drew the penises??? After scrubbing lockers for penis penance, graduated as a Natl Merit Scholar.

    Jun 7, 2014 at 11:39 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   LJ Chan

    My daughter had a boy draw not one but TWO penises in her freshman yearbook. I took pictures, sent them to the Dean, then whited them out. She was mortified, but she would have been more mortified when someday her children would come upon the book. The boy who drew the penises??? After scrubbing lockers for penis penance, graduated as a Natl Merit Scholar.

    Jun 7, 2014 at 11:41 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   assiveProgressive

      Did he later become a urologist?

      Jun 7, 2014 at 11:15 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Dolly

    I was bullied very badly in middle school and even I was lucky enough that no one bothered to write something mean like this in my yearbook. They had the decency to just write have a good summer like a normal person would.

    Jun 7, 2014 at 11:33 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   sam

    Neither of these comments strike me as particularly nasty or bullying. They don’t insult the kids appearance or anything. The second is even pathetically hopeful that he’ll be a nicer person in high school.

    Jun 8, 2014 at 6:21 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   notolaf

      Unless you read her comment, as I did, “Maybe next year you’ll be cool enough for people like me to be friends with.”

      Jun 18, 2014 at 9:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   K

    I had a girl I was “friends” with write ON my picture of my senior yearbook that she hated me. It sucked, especially because I couldn’t white it out. But that was a “friend” with poor impulse control. As for people who genuinely didn’t like me, or vice versa, Buffy had it right: it was always “have a nice summer”.

    Jun 8, 2014 at 6:26 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   The Elf

      ON your picture? Oh that is extra-special level of cruelty.

      Jun 9, 2014 at 7:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   assiveProgressive

    Now THAT is a case where I think she should have been made to buy you a new yearbook. The other examples here, not so much.

    Jun 8, 2014 at 8:16 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Gingerbread Grant

    The girls appear docile, eh?
    Didn’t the Bible say that the Devil will come like a thief in the night?
    Children are Devils, I tell you!!

    Jun 14, 2014 at 5:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   macphile

    I have a signature book from Girl Scout camp that at least twice contains a reference to my being weird (“I like you even though you are a weird person”). I also had a message that ended with the rather neatly expressed but self-deprecating phrase, “…had fun been your roommate.” This was from a girl who was very large (back in the days when most kids weren’t) and didn’t have a good time at camp.

    Jun 18, 2014 at 5:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Rory

    This doesn’t seem like bullying to me. To me, this seems like a kid who’s an ass (like most middle school boys are) doesn’t gives his yearbook to people he’s been an ass to to sign, and they kind of go like “What? Why does this jerk want me to sign his yearbook? Does he not realize how much of an ass he is?” (note: he probably doesn’t, because middle schoolers have very little self-awareness) and decide to write what they honestly feel.

    Senior year of high school one of the weird boys in government class (he made irrelevant conspiracy-theory like comments and hit on the male teacher) gave his yearbook to the boy who sat next to me, and that boy wrote “You’re weird as hell, fugly and probably gay.” THAT was bullying; but these comments aren’t overly mean.

    Jun 30, 2014 at 6:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Jessie seems kind of mean, but at least Ileana’s comment is constructive.

      Aug 1, 2014 at 7:07 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    I can’t pick a side on this one; maybe the submitter’s son really is a jerk for all we know.

    Aug 1, 2014 at 7:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Warren

    What this post tells me is that schools need to start teaching cursive again. A girl with Jessie’s handwriting would be ashamed of herself in my day. (I’m assuming she’s a girl because of the “I”.)

    Aug 5, 2014 at 3:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up