“Kitchen warfare has become somewhat of a spectator sport around here,” says our submitter, of his office in Vancouver. Perhaps a Vegan Support Group is in order?
related: Texts from Obnoxious Vegan Girl
FILED UNDER: milk · office
The milk was fucking delicious.
Jun 18, 2014 at 6:49 pm rating: 30
Ah, the classics…
Jun 19, 2014 at 7:07 am rating: 6
In this specific case, the note writer has a point that is not really vegan-related.
The company did catch a lot of flack when videos of workers abusing the cows were posted on-line. The company claims the workers were fired, but the company still lost their contract with a Quebec-based cheese-maker, Saputo.
Jun 18, 2014 at 7:09 pm rating: 20
Well how else do you whip cream?
Jun 19, 2014 at 4:30 am rating: 27
This note is a jerky way to make the point, regardless of the point’s validity.
Jun 19, 2014 at 6:42 am rating: 27
TRT, it’s 1% milk. That is never going to turn into cream, no matter how hard or how long you whip it.
Jun 19, 2014 at 7:13 am rating: 7
What if we get Devo to do the whipping? I hear they whip it good.
Jun 19, 2014 at 12:48 pm rating: 50
Dammit Jami, now I can’t get the song out of my head.
Jun 19, 2014 at 2:14 pm rating: 8
Jami wins the internets!
Jun 19, 2014 at 3:35 pm rating: 11
Ace of Space
Can’t do it. It sat out too long.
Jun 19, 2014 at 4:01 pm rating: 4
Goddammit, Jami, now I have to listen to that.
Ace: It’s not too late!
Jun 19, 2014 at 4:59 pm rating: 5
Thank you. I’d like to share this internet with everybody. FREE INTERNETS FOR ALL!
Jun 19, 2014 at 5:00 pm rating: 16
YOU get an internet! and YOU get an internet!
Jun 20, 2014 at 12:07 pm rating: 15
What does the note on the right say? It’s cut off.
Jun 18, 2014 at 7:39 pm rating: 9
“This is still full! And now it’s [spoiled]“
Jun 18, 2014 at 8:16 pm rating: 16
And by writing on paper, you are supporting deforestation. Think of all the little birdies and buggies and squirrelies that lived in that tree too!
I guess we’re both going to hell. I’ll bring the chips, you bring the dip.
Jun 18, 2014 at 7:50 pm rating: 46
Unless it was recycled paper!
Jun 19, 2014 at 8:38 am rating: 3
No worries, I have caterers there.
Jun 19, 2014 at 1:15 pm rating: 6
Protest with your own funds! Don’t waste someone else’s money because you don’t like it- screw you, hippy!
Jun 18, 2014 at 10:03 pm rating: 34
Oh, for god’s sake!
Jun 18, 2014 at 10:07 pm rating: 2
Does that say “LooL it up”?
Jun 19, 2014 at 12:22 am rating: 6
“Letting the milk spoil on the counter means the cows suffered in VAIN.” Wasting food really ticks me off. Also – there aren’t always a lot of options when it comes to brands of milk at the grocery store.
Jun 19, 2014 at 3:22 am rating: 48
Yeah, this is literally the only brand of milk my grocery store sells.
Jun 19, 2014 at 9:19 am rating: 6
I find the note writers compassion for animals to be udderly mooving.
Jun 19, 2014 at 7:09 am rating: 28
Worse than abusing cows, is your use of silly puns. I simply can’t kowtow to that lowest form of humor.
Jun 19, 2014 at 11:20 am rating: 12
Dane’s just milking this thread for all he can get out of it.
Jun 19, 2014 at 3:39 pm rating: 8
Cud it out!
Jun 19, 2014 at 3:52 pm rating: 5
I’m really starting to sour on this thread. It if goes on much longer it’ll get real cheesy.
Jun 19, 2014 at 4:38 pm rating: 8
Oh come on, that’s udderly ridiculous. You’re going to have to hoof it and live life on the lam(b). Just don’t pull the wool over our eyes…
(look what you did)
Jun 19, 2014 at 5:00 pm rating: 4
Wait, are we allowing sheep puns in the dairy section? Well I guess they do produce milk…
Ok, the Supreme Quart has decided to allow it.
Good for you Lita! Whey to stick it to the 1%! Sorry I doubted you. I just lact the proper perspective.
Jun 19, 2014 at 8:08 pm rating: 13
Though sheep puns are quite amoosing, I have to steer this thread away from them. I’ve herd them all before. They just seem to go in one ear and out the udder.
Jun 20, 2014 at 6:44 am rating: 7
Goddammit, I love you guys. <3
Jun 20, 2014 at 3:45 pm rating: 1
I think these puns are stupid. Anyone got a beef with that?
Jun 20, 2014 at 4:38 pm rating: 2
Don’t try to get their goat, rushgirl. It only goads them further.
Jun 20, 2014 at 7:24 pm rating: 1
Bottom line: veganism and boycotting companies that support “animal cruelty” are choices. You don’t get to decide other people’s choices, and you have no right to force yours on others.
Jun 19, 2014 at 7:46 am rating: 35
The letter writer didn’t force anything on anyone, though the note was kinda stupid. I mean, it’s not like s/he threw the milk out. S/he should have written something about looking up the recent Saputo dairy investigations from Mercy for Animals, since that’s what I assume it was in response to.
Jun 19, 2014 at 9:03 am rating: 1
No, but it looks like the notewriter left the milk out on the counter, which would most likely result in it being spoiled. Same end result.
Jun 19, 2014 at 9:20 am rating: 39
The second note implies that the writer of the first note took the milk out of the fridge and left it on the counter, which is a dick move.
However; it would have to sit out on the counter for a fair while before it spoiled. More than the couple of hours that a carton of milk is likely to sit out in a busy office without being noticed. Unless it’s lumpy and lemon-flavoured, just put it the fuck back in the fridge and move on with your life.
Aug 1, 2014 at 7:04 am rating: 0
“Oh, doctors are always changing their mind. One week bacon grease is bad for you. The next week we’re not getting enough of it.”
Jun 19, 2014 at 8:12 am rating: 9
Pork fat rules.
Jun 19, 2014 at 5:01 pm rating: 1
This is why I drink only Disneyland milk.
They treat their animals anthropomorphically.
Jun 19, 2014 at 8:47 am rating: 36
Oh, you don’t need to go as far as Disneyland if you want that kinda milk. As you undoubtedly recall, Springfield Elementary has been feeding its pupils rat/mouse milk for years now, thanks to the environmentalist concern of Fat Tony.
Jun 20, 2014 at 7:28 pm rating: 4
Reminds me of a former co-worker of mine, a very militant vegan. Mind you some of my other co-workers were vegan too, but they didn’t try to force their dietary beliefs on others.
Anyway, the militant vegan went to HR and DEMANDED that all “carcasses” (anything containing animal products) be removed from all of our vending machines. And that there should be a separate fridge for vegans (at that time there were maybe 4 vegan employees) out of a little over 300 employees) so no cross-contamination occurred.
HR firmly let him know that he would not be allowed to force his dietary beliefs on his fellow employees and he literally had a tantrum, screaming that we were all murderers and stamping his feet.
Not surprisingly he got fired not long after that when he got caught in the act of, as he put it, “cleaning out the break room fridge”. He had dragged over the large garbage can in the break room to the fridge and was pulling out any food and drinks that contained animal products and was tossing them in the garbage can.
Yeah, dude had some issues
Jun 19, 2014 at 2:12 pm rating: 35
Dude had entire subscriptions.
Jun 19, 2014 at 5:01 pm rating: 53
The Beast Among Us
I thought you were going to say that he got caught fucking chickens in the bathroom, but I was unfortunately disappointed.
Jun 20, 2014 at 2:28 pm rating: 11
Heh! That’s hilarious
Jun 21, 2014 at 10:55 pm rating: 0
Next you’re gonna tell me Candy Mountain isn’t real either, right!?!?!?
Jun 19, 2014 at 6:25 pm rating: 3
Note is not from a vegan, it’s specifying a particular brand of milk, not saying no one should drink any milk…
Jun 19, 2014 at 9:20 pm rating: 3
Dairy products (with maybe the exception of ice cream) have regional monopolies. So practically they are saying that you shouldn’t drink milk.
Jun 19, 2014 at 10:50 pm rating: 1
Maybe. Militant Vegan = Obnoxious Food Police, but not necessarily the same way around.
Still, it’s not a huge leap.
Jun 20, 2014 at 4:41 pm rating: 1
You can only buy one brand of milk in the US?? I live in a tiny country and we have loads to choose from. Not questioning the note writers obnoxiousness, just pointing out a vegan would’ve said ‘milk’ not ‘Dairyland milk. ‘
Jun 21, 2014 at 9:05 pm rating: 1
No, we have loads of brands. But sometimes a store will only sell one brand and if you live in a really small town in a rural area where there’s only one market in a 50 mile radius you’re kind of fucked.
Jun 22, 2014 at 12:14 am rating: 4
Or sometimes we have more than one brand, but they’re really owned by the same company and simply marketed/packaged differently under different names (Lucerne and Marigold I think are an example)
Jun 22, 2014 at 10:07 pm rating: 2
Did somebody say ice cream?
Jun 23, 2014 at 9:02 am rating: 1
Or the national brand which comes from who-know-where and contains who-knows-what is half the price of local milk where the cows are treated ethically.
Jun 23, 2014 at 10:54 am rating: 1
This reminds me of when I was a kid at school, reading a book in class, while I was waiting to take part in a bible olympiad (not optional). My teacher came up to ask what I was reading, and was horrified to find it was one of Stephen King’s books (I forget which one). She made a big scene of how disappointed she was in me, and got all emotional and called me out in front of the class. I didn’t have any idea who the author was, or why this book was presumably inappropriate for me to read (at all, or at that time specifically). It was just a random book I picked up.
Also, random, completely irrelevant, but one of my favourite TV shows as a kid was of a cow and a cat that ran a dairy together, and who were attacked every so often by Bac and Teria, two creatures from out of space. It was pretty amazing.
Jun 20, 2014 at 7:33 am rating: 7
Ughhhh there is nothing on this planet worse than an activist that doesn’t get it.
You know what’s great? Getting mad an animal was abused to create a product, then letting it spoil. Yeah that’s so much better.
Jun 24, 2014 at 6:20 pm rating: 0
Good Habits (@GoodHabits5)
Google pay 97$ per hour my last pay check was $8500 working 1o hours a week online. My younger brother friend has been averaging 12k for months now and he works about 22 hours a week. I cant believe how easy it was once I tried it out. This is wha I do……
Jun 28, 2014 at 9:29 am rating: 0
Using paper to leave notes damages the environment.
Oct 16, 2014 at 10:24 pm rating: 0
Register and make it official, already!
Want to associate an avatar with your login name?
Password lost, forgotten, or M.I.A.?
— Ed Decatur
2011: The Top Notes of the Year
2010: The Funniest Notes of the Year
2009: The Best Notes of the Year
2008: Your Favorite Notes of the Year
Carnivores: keep being awesome!
actually totally reasonable
a little patronizing
clip art catastrophe
flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens
landlords and property managers
Moms & Dads
more aggressive than passive
most popular notes of 2010
most popular notes of 2011
most popular notes of 2012
most popular notes of 2013
now that's management
sex sex sex
signed with love
spelling and grammar police
thanks (but not really)
unnecessary "quotation marks"
You call that punctuation?