But what does the fox say?

July 8th, 2014 · 98 comments

Writes Kate in Pensacola, Florida: “There’s a new subdivision going up near me, and the farmer next door is NOT happy about it.”

NOTICE: This property is a farm Farms have animals. Animals make: Funny sounds Smell bad, and Have sex outdoors UNLESS YOU CAN TOLERATE Noise, Odors, and Outdoor sex DON'T BUY PROPERTY NEXT TO A FARM!

(And then, of course, there’s the city version…)

related: Oh, the rancher and the McMansioner should be friends

FILED UNDER: Florida · horses, cows, & chickens · sex sex sex

98 responses so far ↓

  • #1   shwo!

    Noise, odors, and outdoor sex. Are they next door to a farm or Coachella?

    Jul 8, 2014 at 7:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   FeRD bang

    Yes, I can see how our friendly farmer wouldn’t want the special charms of Pensacola ruined by a bunch of… people moving in next door!

    Next thing you know, they’ll be paving roads, installing sewers and indoor plumbing, even sullying the place with their confounded electrical doo-dads! Won’t be long a-’fore the place just ain’t fit for hard-workin’, noisy, smelly, outdoor-sexin’ Floridians.

    Or their livestock!

    Jul 8, 2014 at 7:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   kermit

      Come on, now be fair. If you were an old and shriveled pudgy prune you’d be p!ssed too if a bunch of co-eds moved beside you and made the contrast more apparent?

      What widow or divorcee would respond to the amorous overtures of a farmer when they have the option of a condo-owner?

      Jul 9, 2014 at 7:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Lisnya

      It’s a farm. Roosters will wake you up at 5 am, you’ll find shit everywhere along the road, you’ll be able to smell your neighborhood from miles away and flies, fleas and other insects will be everywhere. Your only choices are to adapt or go the fuck away and leave the farmers alone.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 6:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   TimPundit

      Hell, I want this sign! I’m tired of idiots making Summer homes near our farms then bitching about the smell. Go back to the concrete ya wankers.

      Jul 18, 2014 at 3:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   Cady

    You’d be amazed how often a subdivision goes up next to a farm and then after a few months/years the homeowners suddenly realize, “Holy crap! Farms smell like shit! Animals make noise whenever they feel like!” and start complaining. I’m totally supportive of integrating rural and urban communities, but as that integration occurs, people need to understand what living near agriculture (and conversely, living in an urban environment) entails.

    Jul 8, 2014 at 9:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Iwill FindU

      My friends lived out in the country, until it was no longer country and the number of people that complained about their animals, trying to get the animal shelter to come take their “poor abused” animals. After awhile all the shelters knew their address, and just stopped coming by to check them out. Because surprise surprise city people don’t know what a well cared for livestock look like, or just don’t like living next to livestock and think they’re super sneaky trying to get the animals taken away.

      Jul 8, 2014 at 9:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   The Elf

      My favorite were the people in Potomac (land of the multi-million dollar McMansions) who moved next to a quarry and complained of the noise. It’s a quarry! Did you expect it to be quiet?

      Jul 9, 2014 at 7:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.3   Lil'

      I live in town but my neighbor behind me has an array of farm animals. It was a shock to my system at first but after 9 years I would miss that rooster if he didn’t crow every morning. I wouldn’t have picked it, and I certainly didn’t seek it out, but I tolerate a reasonable amount of my neighbors’ impositions in hopes that they do the same for me. So far so good.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 8:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.4   Tesselara

      I think they expected it to be picturesque, and there for their own convenience and pleasure. Rather like an electric fireplace that they could turn off and on at their own convenience. Team Farmer and Quarry.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 8:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.5   kermit

      As far as farm animals go, roosters can be real dicks, and not just because they crow at dawn.

      However living next to a farm has the added bonus of giving you ready access to fresh poop, which you can use to take revenge against your enemies, annoying co-workers, etc. And if you happen not to have any foes, the poop is free fertilizer for your own garden.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 9:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.6   assiveProgressive

      I’ve heard roosters can be real cocks. Yes, ahem. Free fertilizer — we had a big bag of horse shit in our garage (it came from the place where spouse boards her horse) that a friend wanted for her garden. See what great pals we are –we’ll give you shit if you just ask.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 10:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.7   pooham

      A NM egg farm moved b/c of people who wanted to live in Taos.


      Jul 9, 2014 at 2:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.8   kermit

      I misread that as “people who wanted to live in Tacos“. And really, what kind of person wants to live in a taco?

      Jul 9, 2014 at 4:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.9   Lita bang

      Team farmer. I actually live in farm country (not right next door to a farm, no, but I think I’d prefer that over the idiots in the apartments next door) and it is seriously awesome.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 4:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   JT

    Yeah, we’ve got all those problems in my subdivision and there aren’t any animals in the area.

    Jul 8, 2014 at 9:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   mb35

      Your comment reminded me of the last time I went to use my apartment complex’s laundry room. Someone had climbed onto the sorting counter and deposited a turd for all the world to see.

      Soon after that, I got a portable washer.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 4:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   assiveProgressive

      Did you write a PA note first?

      Jul 10, 2014 at 10:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   Trella

    So I actually have to side with the farmer here. I’ve always lived in very rural areas, and more than a few times I’ve had friends or known people who had developments start that bordered their farms. Then the people who moved in complained about the smells/sounds of the animals and eventually it caused major problems for the farms.

    If you’re going to move in next door to a farm you should expect it to be a farm. The farmer has probably gotten complaints and was pretty obviously there first. So…

    Team Note-writing Farmer all the way.

    Jul 8, 2014 at 9:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Tesselara

      ME TOO! I worked in Westchester County, NY for a while, and became convinced that there is a large population of humans that are 1) hugely opinionated about nature being “dirty” and 2) will probably die in the “zombie apocalypse” (whatever actual shape that will take), because they have absolutely no useful skills.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 8:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   deprogrammed

      Team Farmer, all the way. But it will probably be people like those who move in next to airports and complain about planes taking off and landing.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 2:48 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   labdude

      I used to work with an engineer that was also a pilot. His house was near the approach to a mid-sized regional airport. When he and his wife put their house on the market, the realtor asked ‘does the airplane noise bother you?’ and he answered quite truthfully, ‘not a bit’. Apparently, the realtor took it to mean that there was no noise and was less than happy the first time a FedEx jumbo landed while she was showing the house…

      Jul 15, 2014 at 11:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   labdude

      I used to work with an engineer that was also a pilot. His house was near the approach to a mid-sized regional airport. When he and his wife put their house on the market, the realtor asked ‘does the airplane noise bother you?’ and he answered quite truthfully, ‘not a bit’. Apparently, the realtor took it to mean that there was no noise and was less than happy the first time a FedEx jumbo landed while she was showing the house…

      Jul 15, 2014 at 11:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   labdude

      sorry for the dupe – I didn’t think the first one took.

      Jul 15, 2014 at 3:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.6   The Elf

      No worries. I’ve had that same problem.

      No worries. I’ve had that same problem.

      Jul 15, 2014 at 3:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.7   Jamie

      Yes! My husband and I bought ten acres in the middle of an agricultural zone. There are farms all around, and we want to start our own mini-farm. The house immediately adjacent to our property finally sold after a year of being vacant, and when we met the neighbors we apologized in advance for being farmy: crowing rooster, non-stop tractor noises, a baying beagle, and me out there calling to the chickens in a voice not unlike Ma Kettle. Luckily, they said they moved to the country because they WANTED to be around farms, so to them farm noise is 100% better than city noise. Hopefully that sentiment lasts…

      Jul 19, 2014 at 9:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   Roto13

    The punctuation in this sign is making me uncomfortable. Why is there a colon after “make” when there’s only one thing being made? Why is there no comma after “sounds?” Where is there a period after “odors?”

    Just… auuuggghhh

    Jul 8, 2014 at 11:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   Lil'

      City folks and your damn punctuation!

      Jul 9, 2014 at 8:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   Kwyjor

      I am shocked to realize that I didn’t notice these things until you pointed them out. (There’s even a period after “Tolerate” instead of a colon!) I guess I was impressed by the layout, which is rather artful and eye-catching, as these things go.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 10:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.3   rushgirl2112

      It could be a comma after “odors,” but yeah, the rest of it bugs me.

      I agree with the spirit of the message, though.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 11:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   Jami

    Hey, the farmer has a point. There used to be some big cow farms along a major freeway. Bunch of condos went up, the people started complaining about the smell of cow shit. Cows had to go bye bye instead of the humans doing the right thing and moving the fuck out of cow country!

    Jul 9, 2014 at 12:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   mulewagon

      Well, I hope the complainers are all vegans.

      Or else where do they think their milk, meat and leather come from, the Carnivore fairy?

      Sep 5, 2014 at 6:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   Nikki

    Yeah, I think the submitter misinterpreted the situation. My bet is that the farmer would be fine with the subdivision if those putting in or moving into the subdivision accepted the fact that the farm was there first and all that goes into living next to a farm. Sure the dairy reeks but I loved living close to a legit family dairy complete with fresh milk in reusable containers and ice cream.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 12:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   assiveProgressive

    There’s a hobby farm about a mile from here that has donkeys, and in the middle of the night, when the traffic is gone, I can hear the donkeys braying if I’m outside. The county to the south of us has a crazy mixture of working farms and McMansions, and the farms do have very official-sounding signs warning of the possibility of noise, dust, odors, etc. While I have been horrified by the smells of some of the factory farms (poultry, usually), I have never in 20 years of living and riding my bike around here seen any farm animals having orgies.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 12:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Tanya Hill

    The farmer is absolutely in the right. People do have a habit of moving to the country and “suddenly realising” it’s noisy or smelly

    Jul 9, 2014 at 3:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   TRT

    Tolerate funny noises, bad smells and outdoor sex? Hell, that’s a major selling point!

    Jul 9, 2014 at 4:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   assiveProgressive

      As a kid, I lived in the city, and if my family went for a long drive, we knew when we were in a rural area because of that “good country air” — the smell of cow shit. Also known as “dairy air.”

      Jul 9, 2014 at 9:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.2   Jami

      My mom often tells about how on Sunday drives her brothers used to open the car windows to let in the smell of cow shit and take deep breaths and tell her it would grow hair on her chest until she would cry. Cause she didn’t want hair on her chest being a girl and all.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 3:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   Kellie

    The note writer has a point, despite his bad grammar. People are idiots. The airport in our state has been around for, oh I don’t know, 30+ years(?) People within the last 20 years have built and purchased homes within a mile or two of the airport and then COMPLAINED ABOUT THE NOISE of planes taking off and landing. Some even went so far as to suggest the airport be closed. (Selfish bastards.)

    You buy a house near an existing thing that produces unpleasant sounds, odors, whatever…you be prepared to live near that kind of stuff. Don’t complain after the fact.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 6:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Snicklefritz

      The same situation occurs next to the public parks I used to manage. People would complain about the kids playing soccer, or swimming, or just plain running around yelling like kids do when they’re …. well, running around and getting lots of healthy exercise, sunshine and fresh air.

      Did they look at the property at night and not realize there was a huge park next door?

      Jul 9, 2014 at 7:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   The Elf

      Usually they lobby the airport to change the flight path. Because of course, that flight path was chosen just to annoy them and has nothing to do with managing airspace efficiently.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 7:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   kermit

      i met a toad
      the other day by the name
      of warty bliggens
      he was sitting under
      a toadstool
      feeling contented
      he explained that when the cosmos
      was created
      that toadstool was especially
      planned for his personal
      shelter from sun and rain
      thought out and prepared
      for him

      do not tell me
      said warty bliggens
      that there is not a purpose
      in the universe
      the thought is blasphemy

      a little more
      conversation revealed
      that warty bliggens
      considers himself to be
      the center of the said
      the earth exists
      to grow toadstools for him
      to sit under
      the sun to give him light
      by day and the moon
      and wheeling constellations
      to make beautiful
      the night for the sake of
      warty bliggens

      to what act of yours
      do you impute
      this interest on the part
      of the creator
      of the universe
      i asked him
      why is it that you
      are so greatly favored

      ask rather
      said warty bliggens
      what the universe
      has done to deserve me

      Jul 9, 2014 at 12:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   LittleBirdy

      I liked this poem, so I looked for the author – Don Marquis, in case anyone else was wondering :)

      Jul 9, 2014 at 7:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.5   Tesselara

      I love Don Marquis! Archy and Mehitabel for the win!

      Jul 10, 2014 at 8:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.6   kermit

      The best part is now that most of his works are in the public domain, they’re a lot easier to find on-line than hunting down used book-stores that carry them. “A Scientific Note” from “Noah an’ Jonah an’ Cap’n John Smith” is my favorite so far.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 9:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.7   oilybohunk7 bang

      A lot of people who bought new, fancy condos next to a FESTIVAL site in our downtown area started complaining about the noise of the festivals. The festivals have been going on for decades and bring a lot of money to the town. If you wanted it quiet perhaps downtown living isn’t the place for you.

      Jul 24, 2014 at 11:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   buni

    Team farmer here too. Good for him to let people know what they’re getting into before they buy the property. I live in an area that is a mix of farms and suburban-style homes. I live right next door to a soybean field (last year it was corn) and there’s a vegetable farm down the street. I know noise, dust and occasional odor is the price to pay for farm-fresh veggies and I wouldn’t dream of complaining. I also keep a small herd of rabbits and, while I haven’t had any problems with my neighbors, I know other rabbit-raising friends who have to hide their hobby, like they’re making drugs or something.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 7:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   Dane Zeller

    The people who moved into our rural area started complaining about the outdoor sex so much we had to move indoors.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 8:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   The Elf

      Usually that’s an urban issue that generates PA notes on windows “Apt 2! I can see you shagging!”

      Jul 9, 2014 at 8:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   Quite Contrary

    What are noise odors?

    Jul 9, 2014 at 11:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   The Elf

      Hang out at my place on chili night. You’ll find out.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 11:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   kokopuff

    Roosters do not just crow at dawn. They crow all damn day.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 1:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   The Elf

      The rooster crows at midnight.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 6:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.2   Lita bang

      But only if you’re a Redditor.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 10:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   mutzali

    Team Farmer!
    My sister has a working horse ranch up near Sacramento. All the neighbors have horses (and the occasional cow or sheep). A new neighbor moved in, and immediately started calling in complaints about the “manure piles” everywhere that were interfering with their enjoyment of their new swimming pool. Multiple calls. Every week. The Sheriff’s deputies came out, looked, and laughed. (Most of them are members of the Sheriff’s mounted search and rescue Posse, and board their horses in similar ranches.)

    The neighbors then started calling in noise complaints about the skeet shooting club about a mile down the road, and the kennels about a mile the other way.

    The sheriff’s guys finally told the new neighbors to stop calling 911 for repeated, unsubstantiated, nuisance complaints, or they could be cited.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 3:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   The Elf

      I love your sherriff’s department.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 6:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.2   Tesselara

      Me too!

      Jul 10, 2014 at 9:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.3   Lita bang

      Me three. :D

      Jul 10, 2014 at 10:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   Roundredhead

    I live in a subdivision right in the middle of a whole bunch of corn and soybean fields, and basically it’s delightful. Occasionally you get stuck behind farm machinery on the road. Sometimes there’s dust, and a lot of us get field mice in our homes every once and a while. But the farms were there first and this is a rural community. That said, I sometimes have nightmares about someone opening one of those massive industrial scale pig farms nearby. Sure this is farm land, but those things make the air reek for miles. There is one I pass regularly on the interstate and you always know exactly where you are even in the middle of the night because the smell is unmistakable and seriously scary. Surely there’s some other way.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 6:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   Poltergeist

    I’m going to have to agree with the farmer as well. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a suburban boy, not a country boy, which is exactly why I wouldn’t move in next to a farm. If the farm was there first, you have no right to complain.

    It’s like the people who move in next to a school but then complain about the noise of hundreds of children. And it’s not even always childless old people – young parents move in who think they have “perfect” kids and will complain about everybody else’s incompetence. No, we don’t encourage kids to scream like banshees and will discipline those who do, but noise is inevitable. And yes, sometimes a ball will go flying over your fence and land in your backyard. If you can’t deal with these things, you shouldn’t have moved in next to a school.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 6:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   assiveProgressive

      If they can ban child molesters from moving in near schools, they can ban whiny people too, methinks.

      Jul 9, 2014 at 9:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.2   The Elf

      Oh, if only. In a recent coversation with a relative (one of the older generation who probably goes to Jami’s library), he complained that the kids down the street from him play soccer. In their yard. In the middle of the day.

      WTF? They are kids! If they were indoors all day, I’m sure he’d complain about how the kids are slothful.

      Some people just aren’t happy unless they are complaining.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 6:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.3   Kasaba

      Overheard three old women in the post office complaining about kids playing outside near their respective houses. I was shaking my head in disbelief. Kids hardly play outside these days, and in this country the weather often prevents them from doing so. Why are you being so mean and awful. You were young once too. Most houses have double glazed windows anyway, which should provide good noise isolation. If they were kicking balls in your face or your petunia beds or up your cat’s bum, then sure, complain, but you were complaining just because they were playing.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 7:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.4   Lil'

      The other night I took my kids to a Mexican restaurant. The waitress showed us to our table which happened to be a booth near the bar then she walked away as I was settling in. There was an older couple in the booth just across from us. The wife gave me a dirty look and said she was “going to find out!” The husband said he would. So she stormed off and came back ranting about how no one could tell her a thing. I had no idea what was going on but when our waitress returned she tore into her for letting my kids “in the bar”. The waitress explained that the booths were family seating, not part of the bar, and offered to seat the couple at the bar or at one of the high top tables next to the bar. They insisted it was the bar and the wife said if one of my kids screamed one time she was walking out of the restaurant. The husband said the whole reason he sat at the bar was to be away from kids. Funny thing was my 6-month-old twins were absolutely quiet (one was sleeping and the other was just fascinated by the surroundings) and my 6-year-old remembered his indoor voice. They on the other hand were talking so loudly I knew his whole work schedule for the weekend, her plans for the holiday, and how poorly her last dinner party went. She can’t tell you one thing my son said. After about 30 minutes, she found that my children were zero disruption to her so she decided to grace us with conversation. I told her that I heard how rude she was regarding my children and I had nothing to say to her. They told me they love children and they have children and grandchildren. When I refused to engage with them, she stormed off with some rant about the south and “damn yankees”. Some people only have the capacity to love their own kids, but the part that fascinates me the most is that they were looking for peace and quiet at a restaurant bar during the World Cup. Really?? So they don’t mind noise unless it’s coming from children.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 9:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.5   kermit

      See, if I was a parent in this situation, I’d be teaching the kids to put a spider/frog/mouse in the old lady’s purse, zip it back up and watch the pandemonium when her bill comes.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 10:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.6   Kat

      I swear, I’d have only let her get as far as “if one of your kids screams I’ll walk out” and I’d have replied “What about if I scream? If I do, will you just go ahead and leave now?”

      Jul 10, 2014 at 11:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.7   JoDa

      I do often ask to be seated in a 21+ bar area or something when it’s available, because I’ve had too many kids ruin a nice meal, but I make sure that’s the case before requesting the seating. I don’t just assume that anything near the bar is adults only. But I’ve had kind of the opposite happen. The hostess went to seat us near a table with two clearly unruly children, and I asked for a different table…even said we’d wait a few minutes more if necessary. They seated us a few tables down, and the parents proceeded to glare at us and continue to ignore their children raising a ruckus. Eventually they seated another couple next to the family, and one of the kids promptly spilled the woman’s (not the parent, the other woman’s) water all over her, and there were several loud comments about how “THAT’S OKAY, SHE’S JUST A KID, SHE DOESN’T KNOW BETTER.” Both your cranky old farts and that family shouldn’t be allowed in public.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 8:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.8   buni

      The only time I can remember being annoyed by the sound of children playing is 20-some years ago, a family moved in down the street from my parent’s house in the city. They had three little girls who were screamers & would run up and down the street shrieking constantly.
      I remember being a little girl and my friends & I never just screamed like that for no reason.

      Jul 11, 2014 at 9:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.9   Jamie

      My favorite noise complaint (I work as an animal control officer) was when one of my chronic complainers left me a voice mail complaining that the FROGS in his neighbor’s yard were croaking too loud at night. His message said, “You’re the animal control officer. There are animals up here that need controlling. I pay taxes!”

      Jul 19, 2014 at 9:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.10   Seanette

      Did he offer any insight into just how one would control the volume of sound produced by WILD animals, or was his idea that all the frogs needed to be killed for inconveniencing him?

      Jul 20, 2014 at 12:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   K

    In my parents’ hometown, people spent YEARS trying to get the train station shut down because of train horns. Now don’t get me wrong, the train in my town (which runs through theirs too) is really f%#&ing annoying, but come on, you don’t have to shut down the whole train station.

    I have an apartment with a pool, which is right near my front door, so I hear children screaming and splashing all day. It’s the middle of summer, and it’s a pool. If the child is poking their head through my open window to scream at me, I’ll complain. Otherwise, I have better things to do with my time.

    I don’t get why people are so whiny about noise. Don’t get me wrong, I have really sensitive hearing and I get migraines sometimes, but that’s what headphones and/or earplugs are for. World doesn’t stop turning just because you want some peace and quiet, and a little background noise never killed anyone.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 7:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Jami

      Depends on the kind of screaming.

      Regular laughter and such is fine. But I recently had to put up with a girl doing those ear piercing shrieks for FIVE HOURS when her parents rented a bouncy castle for a party.

      Five freaking hours of “EEEEEEEEE!” I was ready to go take a knife to that damn thing. (The bouncy castle, not the kid.)

      And the next day even though they weren’t having a party, they blew it up again.

      Then the next week they had ANOTHER party and guess what was back.

      Also every freaking year the fireworks start the last 2 weeks of June. Complete with illegal fireworks like M80s. They’ll shoot a few off, stop for a bit, move to a new area, shoot a few more, stop for awhile, move, shoot – you get the idea.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 1:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   Kat

      The state wanted to build a train station in our town. One of our elected idiots (who was opposed to the project for purely political reasons) made a speech at a town hall meeting trying to get the residents to oppose the project on the grounds that the trains would have to blow their whistles when entering & leaving the station. He was literally drowned out by howls of laughter. We have two RR crossings in our small town. The trains HAVE to blow their whistles as they come through town, whether they stop or not. We have all lived here so long we mentally tune out the train noises – literally don’t even hear it anymore.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 11:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   mutzali

      When our city tore down the old canneries and warehouses and developers built $500K condos next to the existing train tracks, the developers tried to petition the city council to eliminate the train whistles on the freight trains that still use those tracks, AND the warning bells and flashing lights at the crossings, because the noise and lights disturb the residents at night. One of the council members asked, “OK. No lights, bells, or horns. How soothing will they find the sound of a locomotive hitting a Buick at 3AM?”

      Jul 10, 2014 at 5:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.4   JoDa

      I grew up in an area with a lot of at-grade railroad crossings, so I don’t even HEAR train whistles anymore, even though I now live in the city only a few hundred feet from train tracks in an area where they have to blow their whistles. I’m also not too far from the train yard.

      A couple of years ago, someone showed up on my doorstep with a petition to get Amtrak to stop their annual testing, which included blowing the whistles several times a day in the train yard. I told them I was pretty sure the city had limited them to testing the whistles between 8 AM and 9 PM. He confirmed that I was right, but they didn’t want them to blow the whistles at all, and, in fact, wanted to stop them from doing any testing (the testing is one week a year) because “that means more trains than usual rolling on the tracks.” I just nodded and closed the door in his face.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 8:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   assiveProgressive

    I did live once near an interstate in the inner-ring suburbs of a big city. That was horrible, though sometimes interesting, if a car burst into flames, for example. I shall not make the mistake of living near an interstate again

    Jul 9, 2014 at 9:14 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   pooham

      My house is very near a busy street. When I looked at it before I bought it, it was during mid morning or early afternoon hours. I was disappointed to realize after moving in how loud the traffic was during mornings and evenings. But now I hardly notice it.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 2:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.2   Tigerbait

      Dated a guy who lived next door to an interstate on ramp, after one night, I didn’t notice the noise anymore. You get used to it very quickly.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 3:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #21.3   assiveProgressive

      In the summertime, we had no ac, and I worked some weird schedule where I was trying to sleep, and it really sucked. We had a nice balcony, but at 5 p.m. it was just maddening to sit out there.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 10:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   assiveProgressive

    As for this Norman guy, what an ass. Just enjoy the free shows, idiot.

    Jul 9, 2014 at 9:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      If you had watched the TV documentary about his dispute with the pub owner, I suspect you would think very differently. First, the pub wasn’t a music venue for 20 years – it had only recently become a music venue. Second, it wasn’t in the centre of a busy city, it was in a quiet suburb. Third, the owner of the pub – an obnoxious fuck of the first order – actually got all his regulars to start harassing him just because he asked them not to dump their bottles in his garden.

      Aug 1, 2014 at 6:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   Kaankaant

    The fox says: “FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY!”

    Jul 10, 2014 at 5:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   Ostrich

    I live next to the biggest park in Houston. There are 6:30 a.m. aqua aerobics classes two days a week, only during the summertime. Neighbor sent [defensive, self-serving] email to the community asking for help in complaining to the park to have the instructor be quieter because the noise was too loud “at the crack of dawn” and it interrupted her coffee-drinking. Said “I know I moved next to a park, but…”

    Jul 10, 2014 at 9:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   assiveProgressive

      If I could get myself up that early, I would join the class!!

      Jul 10, 2014 at 9:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.2   Ostrich

      I actually want to join, too! I thought about responding and asking if she knew how we could join. :) Too bad I have to go to work.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 12:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.3   The Elf

      Ah, work. Gets in the way of all the good stuff.

      Pays for all the good stuff too, so I guess there’s that.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 1:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.4   buni

      6:30 am isn’t really “the crack of dawn” in the middle of summer. The sun comes up & the birds start singing around 5am. I like sleeping with the windows open, so they always wake me up that early.

      Jul 11, 2014 at 9:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   moatsad

    team farmer. It’s called due diligence . And farms are kind of a necessity.

    Jul 10, 2014 at 6:31 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   LadyIslay

    We warn all prospective tenants about the noises alpacas make whent they’re fighting or attempting to rape/crastrate one another. Animals are loud.

    Jul 15, 2014 at 9:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   buni

      I used to live down the street from a farm that had cows. When the calves were separated from their mothers, both mother and baby cried for days. I always felt bad.

      Jul 18, 2014 at 8:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   dave

    Everybody should be Team Farmer on this one – houses near farms/pubs/roads/railways/airports are cheaper BECAUSE of these issues. You can’t take advantage of the reduced property price, and then complain about the reason it was cheap to start with.

    Jul 24, 2014 at 6:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   wobbler

    Used to have a horse farm, and we pasture bred our mares (meaning the mares ran with the stallion, and he bred them when they gave him the Hey Sailor wink). I can’t tell you the number of times the cops or even Animal Control was called out because of his money-making activities. We’d have a good laugh, I’d give them a glass of ice tea, and we’d go out and pet the horses.

    Jul 27, 2014 at 11:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    Norman Tebbutt is a real man. He and the owner of said pub featured in a TV documentary about nuisance neighbours on UK television several years ago. The owner of the pub was an obnoxious fuck, and Tebbutt’s requests were entirely reasonable.

    Also, the pub had only been a “live music venue” for about two years, and Tebbutt had owned the house for several years.

    Aug 1, 2014 at 6:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #30   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    Team Not-Farmer,
    Not because he doesn’t have a point; but because nobody has actually complained to begin with and he’s just being a jerk.

    Aug 1, 2014 at 6:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #31   Raichu

    Team note-writers – both of them. If you’re moving somewhere, don’t expect the people who were THERE FIRST to radically alter their lifestyle to accommodate you.

    Aug 10, 2014 at 12:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #32   Anonymouse

    There has been a race track just outside the city I’m in for 30+ years. About 8 years ago, someone decided that the lot right behind the track (just off the end of the mile long road) was a good place to build his house. Alas, the noise of jet cars and drag racers was too much for him, and he convinced the city to place a noise restriction on the track. No one was allowed to run after 9 pm.

    The track complied with the restriction for awhile, but eventually got enough complaints they started going until midnight or later, as they had for decades.

    The house is now for sale.

    Aug 22, 2014 at 6:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #33   Caitlin

    My cousin’s father-in-law is a cattle farmer, and after my cousin got married, they built a house right on the property. When the house was finished, they invited the relatives over for brunch to show everyone their new digs. The brunch happened to fall on cattle mating season, so to avoid any live cattle sex shows in the backyard, his wife asked her dad to separate the genders. He took the male cattle with him and the females stayed.

    Sep 5, 2014 at 9:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #34   Stephanie

    Reminds me of the idiots in Colorado Springs, who knowingly purchased a home near the Air Force Academy, and make complaints about the noise.

    Jun 4, 2015 at 11:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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