Screaming Infidelities

April 29th, 2015 · 182 comments

Writes our submitter in Iowa: “This anonymous note from our “disappointed neighbors” was taped to an iron bench in front of our house – on Earth Day, no less!”

Dear Homeowner,   We, your neighbors, cannot help but notice the obscene amounts of dandelions on your lawn. Do you not realize how terrible it looks? Do you not realize the effect this has on community pride, not to mention property values? A few dandelions - sure. But your lawn is an absolute embarassment. you are screaming, 'I don't care how my property looks' with every passing day. We all agree that your lawn is currently the absolute worst lawn in blocks, and urge you to seriously evaluate your lawn care priorities. Signed, Your deeply disappointed neighbors

related: Take that, Homeowners Association!

FILED UNDER: neighbors · there goes the neighborhood


182 responses so far ↓

  • #1   crymeariver

    What a jerk, jeez can’t you help with the drought already and keep your lawn green?!

    Apr 29, 2015 at 7:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Haterade

      ^ Speaking of weeds that keep popping up… XP

      May 5, 2015 at 11:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Haterade

      Just for the record, IIRC there was once a lovely bit of spam between crymeariver’s post and mine. I’m glad to see it gone, but wanted to let any future archaeologists who stumble across this page know I have nothing against crymeariver. (^_~)

      Dec 15, 2015 at 1:46 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   FeRD bang

    Signed,

    Your deeply disturbed neighbors.

    #thereifixedit

    Apr 29, 2015 at 7:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Jami

    Step One: Kill off entire lawn.

    Step Two: Dig it up and fertilize, preferably with something that’ll stink for a few days.

    Step Three: Replace all the grass with native drought resistant wildflowers.

    Step Four: Wait for neighbors to freak out that you have a lawn made of “weeds.”

    It’s something I’d like to do someday. No lawn. Just one giant wild flower garden.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 8:21 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   squib

      One of our neighbors has that — it’s gorgeous, and I am totally jealous of it.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Stefan

      I actually ditched all my lawn (I only had a few hundred square feet to begin with) and replaced it with shrubs, flowers, herbs, bulbs, ground cover, mulch, gravel trails and cobbles. I have a wide variety of stuff and at any given time at least several plants are blooming. My neighbors are constantly telling me how great it looks and how jealous they are. Little do they know that up until a year and a half ago I didn’t know a damn thing about gardening.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 3:29 pm   rating: 93  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Jami

      Some people are seriously “Hank Hill” about lawns and freak out when people replace them with water-wise plants.

      Course, admittedly, it doesn’t help that the only people who’ve done it so far are the smug type who like to rub it in peoples’ faces that they’re supposedly better than everyone. Not unlike those vegans that other vegans daydream about force feeding them meat. Only it’s about lawns, not diets.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 4:33 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   pooham

      I recently went the opposite way and had grass put in where there used to be rocks and yucca. It’s a small area – 400 sq ft in back, 150 sq ft in front. But I love grass even if I do live in the high desert. Sure I use more water now, but I can also sit outside and enjoy my yard now, where before sitting outside was miserable feeling the heat just radiate up from the rocks, even late into the evening. Also, I can cool the house using the windows for a longer way into the spring than before b/c the grass helps keep things cooler. I get a cool breeze blowing thru rather that a hot one.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 5:08 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   Jami

      I don’t want to use my front yard, though. We have a neighbor across the street who talks too damn much.

      Backyard is another story. Hide behind a nice tall fence. Not bothered by anyone other than the police helicopter flying overhead.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 6:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   Kimberly

      I also have a neighbor with an entire yard of wildflowers, it is pretty spectacular. It is around the block but I wouldn’t mind it next to me.

      May 21, 2015 at 2:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   lynn1964 bang

      I would have gleefully, sown wildflowers with special emphasis on buckets of dandelion seeds. Fertilized vigorously, watered extensively and smiled each day as I worked in my “nature” lawn, pulling up the grass. Maybe even going so far as to spend vacation money to hire lawn workers to aid in my endeavors!!

      Jul 8, 2016 at 10:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Eohippus

    I actually prefer a few dandelions on a lawn. It shows me the owner isn’t a control freak. If they’re that nuts about their lawn then chances are they’ll freak out over other little things as a neighbor.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 8:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   The Elf

      You’ll love mine, then! Aside from the fact that I think dandelions are pretty, they can help maintain the health of your bit of earth as long as they haven’t taken over. So I don’t pull them or put chemical killers on them. Monoculture lawn is a bad idea. It’s a good idea to mix up kinds of grasses and plants. And if you have a pet bunny, they love to eat them! Dandelion greens are also edible for humans, and I’ve been known to harvest mine and mix them into a salad.

      The downside of Jami’s wildflowers is that it reduces the use of open space. However, I love the look of it and if you don’t USE your yard for additional living area, it’s a great low-maintenance idea. I’ve been thinking about landscaping part of my property that way.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 7:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Jami

      Yeah, we don’t use the front yard for diddly squat. Only problem is I’d have to put in a big slab of cement going from the big gate to the driveway so anytime we need to get something large into/out of the back yard I wouldn’t crush any plants.

      But since I can’t even get a lawn mower started, having a wild flower lawn would be much easier.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 4:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Feather Blade

      Dandelion heads fried in tempura batter aren’t bad either, as I recall.

      I’m working on replacing the grass in my lawn with various thymes and other creeping groundcovers. This is made easier by the fact that my landlord is allergic to grass and hates mowing.

      Strawberry plants also make a surprisingly good groundcover.

      May 8, 2015 at 3:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   however

    Perhaps it’s not a lawn. Perhaps the homeowner has a dandelion field and is quite happy with it.

    What is a weed to some may be a flower to others.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 9:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   The Beast Among Us

      Dandelion Garden for the win!

      Apr 29, 2015 at 3:00 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Jami

      Maybe it’s a dandelion farm. Remember, they are edible.

      On one of the websites I just looked up, dandelion greens go for $2.32 a bunch.

      Prices for dandelion wine goes from $8 to $17 a bottle just in the first few results.

      Dandelions seem to be a great way to earn some extra money.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 4:25 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Lil'

    Dandelions?? Oh please… my old next door neighbor kept his backyard grass so high, you literally couldn’t see his Labrador walking around out back. You would just hear the grass rustling and his breathy sounds – he was an old dog on his last leg…poor thing couldn’t even bark or see well anymore. It was like Jurassic Park or something. His grass grew to the top of his chain link fence before he sold the house and moved away. After that, the next owners abandoned it a couple of years in and the bank let it overgrow again for a year and a half. Dandelions…

    Apr 29, 2015 at 9:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   L

      We did that one year. We were renting and it wasn’t in our lease that we had to take care of the lawn, and our landlady didn’t do anything about it (and this place sucked in a lot of other ways) and we couldn’t afford it, so it ended up like waist high.

      At the end of June, the town mowed it, charged her a bunch of money for the privilege, and then she bought us a lawnmower and arranged for the neighbour to do it :P

      Apr 29, 2015 at 9:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   Deb

      Hahaha. Brilliant comment. I’m picturing the old lab walking through the grass. You should write stories (if you don’t already!).

      Apr 30, 2015 at 2:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   Lil'

      Thanks, Deb! :)

      L, that’s exactly how you get it done. Over a year after the house was abandoned, an opossum walked off that property and right up to my side door. I opened the door to step out and jumped right back in. (By the way, that is an ugly little creature up close.) After that, I nagged the bank and the county office multiple times a week. It took a couple of months but finally the codes enforcement officer had the lawn mowed and billed the bank an inflated amount. After that, the bank hired a landscaper to stop by every two weeks.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 9:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   Hyacinth

      My neighbor keeps an array of crap across his yard.. literally and figuratively. Dog crap, to be sure… you can smell it.. but also odds and ends that he takes out of the house but can’t seem to part with. And has a confederate flag (very tattered no less) hanging above it all. No wonder my house won’t sell. The note writers would be happy though as he has no grass to speak of, and few dandelions, as the dogs trample the yard and he puts no effort into planting new. His yard, not mine, don’t care.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.5   Dana

      Jurassic Bark.

      . . . I’ll see myself out.

      May 1, 2015 at 5:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.6   The Elf

      Clever girl.

      May 1, 2015 at 7:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.7   Kimberly

      There was a house being sold across the street from me and they stopped mowing, when neighborhood children started making forts in the grass and hanging out there like it was Lord of the Flies I complained to the city, it was mowed within a week.

      May 21, 2015 at 2:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   CF

    After seeing just the title, I am so disappointed that this was not a note about someone’s hair being everywhere.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 9:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Belaani

    Biodiversity is normal and healthy. Spotless, weedless, velvety lawns are achieved with pesticides, herbicides, fungicides, and it sounds like this may come to homicide. I would make some giant, whimsical, dandelion lawn ornaments to keep the little real guys company. Yellow is such a cheerful color! :)

    Apr 29, 2015 at 10:35 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Hyacinth

      Every neighborhood has that guy.. Lawnmower Bob, we call him. Every blade exactly 2.227″ tall, not a weed in sight. I have more fun things to do.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   buni

      My next-door neighbor is like that. She’s old & retired, and has nothing better to do so she rides her lawnmower twice a week. It’s nearly the only time I see her outdoors.
      Then she complains because another neighbor offered to mow my lawn for me and I took him up on his offer. I’d rather spend my yard-maintenance time quietly tending my flower beds, than walking behind a noisy lawnmower.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 2:54 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   dwasifar

    Okay, I’m going to be the jerk here, and express a little bit of sympathy for the note writer. Letting your lawn go completely to dandelions is like sending your kid to school unvaccinated. That kind of lawn is a dandelion contagion center, spreading them all over the neighborhood with every gust of wind.

    Leaving a semi-anonymous note like that is bad form, but being irritated at a neighbor’s dandelion farm is at least somewhat justified.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 10:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   kermit

      People who value lawns like you find on golf courses (as maybe this note writer does) already spray their lawns with enough pesticides to kill the entire neighborhood of people. Therefore, flying dandelion pollen will not have any effect on their lawn.

      If I was on the receiving end of this note, I would take advantage of Amazon’s rent-a-goat service, and have it feast on my dandelions and the note writer’s precious lawn, too.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 11:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   dwasifar

      On the other hand, maybe the neighbors wouldn’t have to use herbicides, or would use less, if it weren’t for the constant reseeding coming from the problem yard. An ounce of prevention, as the saying goes.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 11:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   Jaylemieux

      “That kind of lawn is a dandelion contagion center”

      Oh no.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 11:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.4   kermit

      Oh please.

      A person who values golf course lawns is going to use herbicides no matter what.

      I would be a tad more sympathetic if the excuse offered was allergies. But to blame one person for the fact that this Stepford loon is polluting the environment for his ridiculous aesthetic preferences is really really low.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 12:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.5   dwasifar

      If a lawn sprouts just a few dandelions, herbicides are applied as a spot treatment on the few plants that exist. It’s only if they get out of control that you have to spread weed killer over the whole lawn.

      If this lawn is actually bad enough to spread dandelions over the whole neighborhood, then that owner is the catalyst for increased herbicide use in that neighborhood.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 12:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.6   Eohippus

      Or you could act like a sane human being and not freak out over the appearance of a couple of plants that some have arbitrarily labelled weeds. If it’s that big an issue then bulldoze the whole thing and install astroturf.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.7   dwasifar

      Or you guys could all not freak out over people wanting a pretty lawn. Who are you to say that they should have dandelions if they don’t want them?

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.8   buni

      Dandelions are good for bees. Let the dandelions live.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 2:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.9   pooham

      buni, do you mean Let the dandelions bee?
      ;-)

      Apr 29, 2015 at 3:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.10   kermit

      Dwasifar, we’re not “freaking out over people wanting a pretty lawn”.

      The problem is that this person is trying to dictate what happens on other people’s lawns – lawns which he does not own and therefore has no say in what the owners choose to grow (or not grow) there.

      And yeah, all golf course style lawns ARE sprayed with pesticides all over, not just in spots. That’s how they get to look that pretty, not by spot fertilizing.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 4:23 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.11   The Beast Among Us

      I have to laugh at the original analogy of this one.

      “Letting your lawn go completely to dandelions is like sending your kid to school unvaccinated.”

      If YOUR kid is vaccinated, then you have nothing to worry about, do you? The only kid who will get sick is the unvaccinated kid.

      Likewise, if YOUR lawn has all the appropriate growth and suppression chemicals, then you have nothing to worry about, do you? The only lawn that will get overrun is the untreated lawn.

      This note was entirely about appearance and perceived home value. It’s superficial at best.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 5:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.12   Haterade

      The Beast Among Us, unfortunately that’s not quite how herd immunity works: http://www.vaccines.gov/basics/protection/

      I would also have to laugh at the overblown analogy, though, because the consequences of making other people’s kids sick are grave enough to justify intrusive policy… but the consequences of dandelion seeds don’t justify being a “neighborly” control freak.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 9:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.13   The Elf

      Exactly, Haterade. Killing kids, the elderly, and people with compromised immune systems in no way equates to weedy lawns.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 7:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.14   Hyacinth

      Yeah, but whether you have one or 100, they spread. I don’t cultivate my dandelions, but I don’t spend a fortune trying to get rid of them because there is always a neighbor who seems to work on making them grow and they spread like measles.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.15   Raichu

      Letting your lawn go completely to dandelions is like sending your kid to school unvaccinated.

      You need to stop right there.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 12:22 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.16   Rattus

      Get one of those forked-tongue weed diggers, spend a couple of minutes every evening when you get home from work popping out the ‘lions and enjoying your yard, compost the heads, set the leaves to dry for tea, and Bob’s your uncle vis-à-vis dandelion care.

      And I am sooo thankful that I live in a city that has outlawed pesticides and herbicides. I truly loathed those uptight lawnophiles when that stuff was available. Give me something that looks like nature intended it to, and I’m a happy gardener.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 1:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.17   dwasifar

      Kermit, I think there’s plenty of “you’re doing lawns wrong” to go around on both sides here. We have one note from someone who thinks no lawns should have dandelions, followed by a whole string of comments from people who think it’s wrong to not want dandelions in your lawn.

      All I’m saying here is that Mr. Dandelion Farm’s actions are not occurring in a vacuum. His lawn is contaminating others. If you feel like the proper response to that is, “Well, you shouldn’t want your lawn dandelion-free anyway, so just put up with it,” then you’re basically doing the same thing the note-writer was doing – telling other people what they should do with their property.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 2:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.18   Jalestra

      Second hand dandelions?

      Apr 30, 2015 at 2:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.19   dwasifar

      Haterade and Elf, you’re reading far more into the analogy than I intended.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 2:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.20   buni

      Using pesticides and herbicides is a lot like smoking – it doesn’t hurt just the smoker.
      So, wanting a weed-free lawn and using toxic chemicals to achieve it is like blowing second-hand smoke on the rest of us.
      Plants and insects are at the bottom of the food chain, everything else rests on top.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 3:06 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.21   j-as

      Lol. Potentially giving thousands of other people a deadly disease is the same as letting flowers grow. Yeah. Solid point.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 4:50 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.22   Haterade

      9.19: “Haterade and Elf, you’re reading far more into the analogy than I intended.”

      *goes back to re-read the analogy in the interest of fairness*

      9: “Letting your lawn go completely to dandelions is like sending your kid to school unvaccinated.”

      If you didn’t intend to equate having dandelions in your yard with having unvaccinated kids, perhaps it would have been better to phrase your analogy some other way?

      ~~~~~

      9.17: “…comments from people who think it’s wrong to not want dandelions in your lawn.”

      …you know, if you don’t like characterizations of your own words that you think are unfair, it might be better to not lead off by wildly mischaracterizing the people who you’re going to assert did so.

      ~~~~~

      9.17: “If you feel like the proper response to that [being told not to have dandelions on your own lawn] is, “[snip]…just put up with it,” then you’re [snip] …telling other people what they should do with their property.”

      A: Get the dandelions off your lawn.
      B: No.
      A: You’re telling me what to do with my property.
      B: *gives up in the face of impeccable logic*

      ~~~~~

      I’m not asserting any relationship between the two, just curious: Are you also one of those who believe they’re being discriminated against if they’re not allowed to discriminate against other people?

      Apr 30, 2015 at 5:53 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.23   dwasifar

      Okay, fine, you don’t like the vaccination analogy? Forget about that then and let’s try a different one. The guy with the dandelion lawn is like the guy who has loud parties every night.

      Asking him not to do it is telling him what to do on his property, right? But if he says you should just put up with it, then HE’S telling YOU what you have to do. Either you have to accommodate him, or he has to accommodate you. Or both, but there hasn’t been a lot of “both” in this discussion; it’s been mostly “you have no right to complain about his dandelions even if they affect you.”

      Apr 30, 2015 at 8:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.24   dwasifar

      You know, it just occurred to me why we are on different pages about the vaccination analogy. For some reason you guys are all taking it as “morally equivalent to.” That was totally not my meaning. I meant it as an analogy about how contagion spreads, not as a moral judgment at all. I guess that’s my bad, for injecting such a comparison into a conversation that was already budding with other moral judgments.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 9:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.25   kermit

      If you’re not going to make a moral judgment, then maybe you shouldn’t be using words like “contagion” to describe dandelions.

      Fact 1:
      The use of pesticides for aesthetic reasons (i.e. getting rid of dandelions) IS a contagion upon the environment and doesn’t just affect one person’s lawn. All those pesticides go into the water supply and cause serious environmental damage and health damage to both animals and humans.

      Fact 2:
      Dandelions are not nearly as harmful as pesticides. Yes, they spread easily. But they don’t suffocate the growth of grass (or other plants). And even if they did, having a lawn of dandelions is a hell of a lot more useful than having a lawn of grass. Grass serves solely as an aesthetic purpose, whereas dandelions have many uses (as many people have outlined already).

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.26   dwasifar

      Kermit, the word “contagion” has no inherent moral implication. It’s a neutral scientific term, not a value judgment. And since we’ve reached the point where we are arguing about misusing words, I might point out that pesticides != herbicides.

      Haterade: “I’m not asserting any relationship between the two, just curious: Are you also one of those who believe they’re being discriminated against if they’re not allowed to discriminate against other people?”

      I was going to let this bit of obvious trolling go, but: No, I am not. I do, however, believe that people should make an effort to be considerate to each other, especially if they’re living as neighbors.

      Both parties in the dandelion dispute are inconsiderate. Leaving the note was inconsiderate and self-centered, and kind of a dick move, but I can understand the frustration that led to it, because the receiver is also inconsiderate and selfish in that his neglect affects his neighbors and he doesn’t care.

      When I woke up half an hour early this morning and couldn’t get back to sleep because my mind went to this argument, I realized that we have all now wasted more time and heat on it than it’s worth. So I’m done. Not coming back to this thread. Sorry if you’re offended.

      May 1, 2015 at 6:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.27   SilentPsycho

      Loud parties make noise. A dandelion?

      *holds one up to her ear*

      *cricket chirps in the background*

      May 1, 2015 at 6:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.28   kermit

      From an environmental damage point of view, herbicides and pesticides are the same thing.

      Even “green” herbicides and pesticides contain neonecotenoids, which have extremely damaging effects on bee populations.

      And since you haven’t clued into what we’ve been telling you so far, I’ll be far more blunt. This is about your bullshit argument that someone choosing not weed their own lawn is doing something “wrong” because it’s “damaging” someone else’s property.

      No, it’s the lawn fiend that is damaging everyone else’s property by using pesticides, herbicides and diligently ripping up dandelions for no reason.

      May 1, 2015 at 7:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.29   The Beast Among Us

      My mistake was that I used the word “will” instead of “might.”

      May 1, 2015 at 8:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.30   L

      There’s a mistake also in using a real-life situation that ends in immune-compromised people like cancer patients, the elderly, and children too young to be vaccinnated dying as an analogy.

      People tend to turn off their rationality when you use dead children as a debate point.

      May 4, 2015 at 8:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.31   The Beast Among Us

      True, but that wasn’t my analogy / mistake. Still, moral implications aside, the analogy still lacks in the logic department.

      I understand what she was trying to say: “Your dandelion-ridden lawn spreads dandelions like a child with measles in the 2nd grade.”

      My refute to that analogy is that if your lawn is treated, you have nothing to worry about. Likewise, if your child is vaccinated against measles, he/she most likely won’t get sick.

      May 5, 2015 at 6:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.32   mercy

      Wow you guys are intense. There is a big “green” area between golf course lawn and normal not overtaken by weeds lawn. Guys ever heard of a middle ground? Clearly not. Anwyay, both sides have vaild points. And to all you idignant folk that can-do-what-youdamn-well-please-to-my-front lawn-thank-you-very-much…umm not if it’s dropping the property of my home. I don’t think that’s the case here but let’s take a minute to listen to each other’s points instead of it becoming a battle of who is more clever and wittier than all the rest. But wait, I forget what site I’m on… proceesd

      May 14, 2015 at 4:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Barb

    The grass is always greener ……..

    Apr 29, 2015 at 10:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Kwyjor

    If this came with a nice gift certificate for the local lawn care providers, or even an offer for free weeding, then it might be forgivable. But otherwise, there are a number of things that might conceivably come ahead of “lawn care priorities”. Holy crap.

    Now I want to know what’s written in red marker on the rest of the note. (I thought about going for a tasteless joke about blood here, but it seems inappropriate.)

    Apr 29, 2015 at 11:16 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   nelaina

    And this is precisely why I went rural

    Apr 29, 2015 at 11:35 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Heather

    We got a bearded dragon recently and he loves dandelions! He loves them so much, we have run out! Can I come over?

    Apr 29, 2015 at 11:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Belaani

      Iguanas love them, too!

      Apr 29, 2015 at 12:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   pooham

      kermit mentioned a rent-a-goat in an above comment. Maybe they should also offer rent-a-bearded dragon and rent-an-iguana? That would be so cute.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   Jon

      Horses love ‘em, too!

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.4   Kjeri

      Chinchillas also love them! We could have a whole petting zoo.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 3:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.5   The Beast Among Us

      So do some people!

      Apr 29, 2015 at 5:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   markbark

    Dear deeply disturbed neighbors,
    You are free to lick the accumulated sweat from my left testicle at any time of your choosing. My lawn is currently providing vast amounts of food for our rapidly dwindling supply of honeybees
    Signed,
    The Dandelion Guy

    Apr 29, 2015 at 12:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Belaani

      Don’t forget white clover – good for the soil, and bees LOVE the flowers! Just the left one? What, is the right one a wildlife refuge or something?

      Apr 29, 2015 at 12:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Dana

      Our lawn is, like, 75% clover. It’s just sorta . . . happened.

      May 1, 2015 at 5:29 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   magicdomino

      The nitrogen from clover clippings is the closest my lawn gets to fertilizer. Why work to make the lawn grow when that means even more work to mow it more often?

      May 6, 2015 at 3:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   angrykat

    Dear Neighbours:

    I apologise deeply for my lack of lawn maintenance. Sometimes I let things like
    a full time job ,an hour commute and other commitments that get in the way of weeding. On my weekends. I like to relax and chill. Be happy I mow the lawn. But just for you and your property values, I will plant some pretty pretty flowers. I will use the broken toilette I removed from the basement washroom as a centre piece lawn planter. Nothing says I care about property values like a toilette on the front lawn.

    love, your neighbour.

    Ps: I guess no dandelion soup for you.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 12:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   S Carter

    Where I am from a lawn like that would get you a ticket from the city. I would have written the same, with different words.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 12:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   pooham

      People need to take care of their property. That’s why cities have ordinances regarding the appearance and upkeep of homes. If you’re too busy or lazy to do it yourself, then hire someone.

      My mom’s house was terrible for several years with horribly pealing paint and a deteriorating roof. She finally got those fixed. Now if she would take care of the inside. I don’t think she’s cleaned a toilet in several years. I never say anything though. She’s certainly entitled to live in whatever manner she chooses.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Eohippus

      S Carter please tell us the town so sane people know where not to move.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 1:29 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   Jami

      Actually that’s all cities, Eo. :-/

      When we were remodeling we had no lawn and didn’t have one in the front for several years because dad was, little by little, doing all the work himself on that part. He would be out every weekend sifting the dirt to remove rocks and such. Then he had to dig trenches and lay the pipes for the lawn sprinklers. Next was the fence which we had a hell of a time finding because none of the stores sold wooden fences mom liked. (We finally found a guy online who cut the design mom liked.)

      The entire time we were constantly harassed by this one bitch in code enforcement. She was sending us violations all the time and even threatening to take our house away unless we turned the yard green. We finally had to get the mayor pro-tem involved, it was that bad, and even then dad was all for just dumping a bunch of crushed green rock or spray painting the dirt green just to shut the woman up. After all, she never said it had to be grass, just that it had to be green.

      (I should point out we’ve seen her many times hanging out with that dude who constantly makes false reports to code enforcement. They seem to be buddies.)

      Meanwhile, other neighbors have brown lawns or lawns made up entirely of crabgrass that she’s never bothered with.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 4:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Hyacinth

      A lawn that isn’t mowed is one thing. Many areas don’t allow (allegedly) grass to be more than knee high before owners are fined. But they don’t usually tell you how many dandelions are too many.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   RedDelicious

    This is the reason HOAs exist. Rules that everyone has to follow benefit everyone, and the neighborhood doesn’t devolve into shitty looking homes that no one takes care of. If you don’t give a shit about property value, go live in a trailer. Otherwise, be a big boy and take care of your property like all the other adults do. If you can’t get into maintaining your lawn, hire someone or move into a community that does it for you. Problem solved. Stop being whiny children.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 3:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   corviddreams

      Right. Because there is only one way to maintain a yard and that must be dandelion- free grass. Fuck the environment… This is why normal people hate HOAs. Anal buggers fussing over ridiculous, unimportant crap.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 3:20 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   kermit

      Red, if you want to live in Stepford where all the houses look exactly the same, then maybe move into a condo where such exacting standards are more enforceable.

      People have a right to do whatever they want with land they own.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 4:26 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.3   The Beast Among Us

      HOAs exist for the purpose of making money. Neighborhood values are easily and successfully maintained all over the country without added fees and retributions simply by good neighbors that tactfully lead their neighborhood together as teammates. In fact, HOAs recently have become something for buyers to avoid, effectively lowering home values.

      Apr 29, 2015 at 5:54 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.4   The Elf

      Red Delicious has a point. If this property has an HOA and then lawn violates the covenants, then note-writer should by all means report them. You move into an HOA neighborhood, you are signing up for some rules. (One reason why I loved OUT of an HOA neighborhood. Sometimes you have no options as to housing, but when you do…..)

      If this doesn’t violate an HOA or other local statute, then note writer needs to STFU.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 7:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.5   Hyacinth

      Really? Go live in a trailer? People in trailers don’t care about their property??? Rude.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.6   L

      Some of the trailers in my town have 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, and are HUGE. Like bigger than my house.

      May 1, 2015 at 5:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Pants Go Brown

    Those dandelions are fucking delicious.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 3:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   corviddreams

    I have a yard full of dandelions. I feed them to my chickens and tortoise. They are not weeds, they are a crop. I purposely planted them.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 3:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Kjeri

    They should remove the dandelions right away and replace them with creeping charlie and catnip.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 3:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   kaetra

      And bamboo

      Apr 30, 2015 at 10:29 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   kaetra

      and ditch lillies

      Apr 30, 2015 at 10:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.3   Hyacinth

      Kaetra commented “and bamboo.” Some ass planted a small amount of bamboo just off my property. That shit is everywhere and still growing. What a pain.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 11:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.4   buni

      I love “ditch lilies”! I dug some up and planted them in my yard because I didn’t have any.
      I have a mix of native and non-native plants in my garden and I’m working on adding more natives.
      Plant milkweed for the monarchs!

      Apr 30, 2015 at 12:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.5   Katherine

      Hey its Amazing!!
      I found my school photo,,,,Now It’s your turn..
      http://tinyurl.com/mskvrtp

      May 19, 2015 at 12:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   Sir Puke

    Dandelion haters, get a grip.
    If your property values fall because of a few danelions, well your place is crap to begin with.
    It’s their property, they will live as they see fit. If there isn’t a legal problem here, go eff yourself.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 4:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   El Vee

    Dear Neighborhood,
    I like dandelions. Get bent.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 4:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   megsbert

    The city i live in only cares if the grass is 6 inches Or taller. Its city ordinance. My little patch of front yard (10×10) Is always covered in the yellow flowers…I mow they come back. Due to the birds squirrels and rabbits that live under my porch and trees….I leave them and do not use anything. People dont like it they are more than welcomed to come dig up the weeds.

    Apr 29, 2015 at 8:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   L

    This guy should have seen the tree in my flower garden!

    (It may actually have been a tree branch that transplanted itself… or just a really BIG weed. Like two inch thick trunk/stem big.)

    Apr 29, 2015 at 9:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   AP

    They should wait until the dandelions go to fluff, and then make lots of wishes on the neighbor’s lawns.

    Make them spread all through the neighborhood.

    Apr 30, 2015 at 12:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   dwasifar

      Yeah, because that’s not passive-aggressive at all. ;)

      Apr 30, 2015 at 8:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   Roxy Random

    I’m still reeling over “obscene” in the same sentence with “dandelions.” What, are they planted in the shape of a dick?

    Apr 30, 2015 at 6:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   The Elf

      No, just the tulips.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 7:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   Belaani

      No… that would be the asparagus.

      Apr 30, 2015 at 7:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.3   The Elf

      Tulips…. you know, “two-lips”.

      I didn’t want to have to explain it, but I guess I’m the only one who went there.

      For highly suggestive lawn care advice, I direct you to this hilarious commercial.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QC0uGcorAl0

      May 1, 2015 at 11:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   Barbara Parker

    This from the website mydandelionisaflower.org:
    DID YOU KNOW?
    Here are some interesting facts about the dandelion flower:
    The dandelion is the only flower that represents the 3 celestial bodies of the sun, moon and stars. The yellow flower resembles the sun, the puff ball resembles the moon and the dispersing seeds resemble the stars.
    The dandelion flower opens to greet the morning and closes in the evening to go to sleep.
    Every part of the dandelion is useful: root, leaves, flower. It can be used for food, medicine and dye for coloring.
    Up until the 1800s people would pull grass out of their lawns to make room for dandelions and other useful “weeds” like chickweed, malva, and chamomile.
    The average American recognizes thousands of logos for commercial products, yet recognizes fewer than five plants that grow in his/her area. Dandelions are most likely one of those familiar plants.
    The name dandelion is taken from the French word “dent de lion” meaning lion’s tooth, referring to the coarsely-toothed leaves.
    Dandelions have one of the longest flowering seasons of any plant.
    Seeds are often carried as many as 5 miles from their origin!
    A not so fun fact: Every year Americans spend millions on lawn pesticides to have uniform lawns of non-native grasses, and we use 30% of the country’s water supply to keep them green.
    For a more informative and detailed look please see the dandelion wikipedia article.

    Apr 30, 2015 at 8:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   SucreGlace

      Other fun fact : in French, dandelions are actually called “pissenlit”, which litterally means “piss-in-bed”, because of their diuretic properties.

      May 1, 2015 at 2:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.2   Kat

      In Dutch they are called ‘pisbloemen’ => piss flowers.

      May 1, 2015 at 8:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.3   Cloggy Windmill

      Actually, Dutch people who are not inbred call them ‘paardebloemen’, which means ‘horse flowers’.

      May 2, 2015 at 8:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.4   Kat

      Actually, Belgians also speak Dutch. And it’s ‘paardenbloemen’.

      May 3, 2015 at 4:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   Sassy

    I think I would carefully trim paths through the dandelions, turning into a kind of short yellow hedge maze. Maybe stick a bird bath in the middle. No one could claim I wasn’t tending my yard then….

    Apr 30, 2015 at 9:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   Never known as The Kid

    Just get out the 2 – 4 – D. Problem solved.

    Apr 30, 2015 at 3:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   Feather Blade

      That’s my favorite herbicide ^_^.

      It’s doesn’t seem to make the cats sick the way glyphosate does.

      May 8, 2015 at 4:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #30   Lita bang

    Sigh.

    Now I’m almost ashamed to live in Iowa.

    Apr 30, 2015 at 4:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   j-as

    Dear deeply disappointed neighbors –

    Hi! Welcome to reality! Where flowers aren’t a problem!

    Also, dandilions provide food for bees. You know, those fellas who are dying off in droves because of our pesticides and development and threatening our very potential to be able to grow food outside of a laboratory? Those guys, bzz bzz bzz??

    It’s very disappointing that you don’t care about food supply more than you care about temporary aesthetics. I suggest you become introduced to reality, and go from there.

    Sincerely,

    Your much smarter, more disappointed neighbor

    Apr 30, 2015 at 4:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Jami

    All of this dandelion talk reminds of a fairy tale I read in a doctor’s office once, but can’t remember the title of.

    In the story there’s these fairies who are particular to dandelions and they’re always having trouble because cows keep wanting to eat their homes. And if they try to move into human gardens, the humans pull up the dandelions.

    There’s also a little princess who’s very, very sick and one day a dandelion fairy floats in through her window and asks why she’s in bed on such a beautiful day. When the princess replies she’s too sick to go out of her room the fairy basically says that’s the stupidest thing she’s ever heard of. After a long talk about illness, the power of being outside in the sunshine and fresh air, and the problems the dandelion fairies are having, the princess starts going outside for a little bit every day.

    She gets stronger and healthier and finally can start running around like healthy children and the king, grateful that his daughter is going to live, not die, insists that from then on the gardeners allow dandelions to grow in the royal gardens unmolested so the fairies don’t have to worry about cows anymore.

    Apr 30, 2015 at 4:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   GB

    I wouldn’t be happy if my neighbors had a dandelion field in their yard either (I wouldn’t care enough to say anything, but it would be annoying). Actually, we do have one a few houses down, and the neighbors on either side of them have to work harder to keep their yards at least somewhat clear. We have a service that comes 4-6 times a year to treat the lawn (not an expensive service, just a regular low end one). We sometimes go a couple years without the service, and then when we notice some weeds popping up, we start it again for a couple years. Other than that, we do nothing. My son mows once a week. I suppose if I am out at the mailbox and notice that there is a weed that has come from the neighbors, I will pull it while I’m there (the mailbox is at the property line ). But we don’t obsess in the slightest. And our yard is beautiful. So just because someone has a nice lawn, doesn’t mean that they no lives, or are control freaks, or all the other things being said here. And it isn’t just so that _we_ can have a nice lawn, it is so that our neighbors don’t have to deal with looking at a crappy one.

    May 1, 2015 at 10:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   corviddreams

      Again, it boils down to who gets to decide what a lawn should be. I live in a desert that gets 8″ of rain a year. When ever I pass a green lawn, I get very annoyed because that simply isn’t realistic here, or many places for that matter. I think they are a terrible waste of water and resources. However, I wouldn’t leave PA notes about it on my neighbor’s porch.

      May 1, 2015 at 11:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.2   GB

      Yeah, we never water our lawn. Even when the service says that we should, to set the treatment. =) We are pretty bad about it. But, still looks better than the neighbors, so we’re good.

      May 1, 2015 at 1:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.3   L

      I think it actually annoys our neighbour that our grass is, like, gorgeous and hers is, like… she’s the type of person who would be out there cutting it with manicure scissors, you know? We honest to god cannot kill the lawn no matter how hard we’ve tried XD We ignore it and leave it be and it grows soooooo fast.

      But if it gets too long, she reports us to our housing. Which is NOT her housing – she owns her house, we rent through low-income housing. And I’m not talking over the top, just a little shaggy (usually this happened when we were very broke and waiting for pay day). We have a new head manager person, though, so maybe that’ll stop her this year, lol.

      You know she actually came over one day and mowed the dirt under our tree? There’s not even grass there, it’s just dirt because the tree is so huge there’s no sun! All she did was raise the dirt and bother both our allergies. Literally mowed the dirt. Without asking.

      May 4, 2015 at 8:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #34   IDM Latest

    Your community is going to thanks for this act! You have to do some more things like that for the betterment of community!

    May 1, 2015 at 2:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Paula K

    I would be tempted to cut out a plywood hand flipping a giant bird & affix it to the top of my roof.

    May 1, 2015 at 8:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   Jami

      Or cultivate the dandelions into such a shape upon the lawn.

      May 3, 2015 at 11:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #36   The Elf

    They wouldn’t have to worry about their lawns if only they kept their cats outdoors.

    May 2, 2015 at 3:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Poltergeist

    Explain to me again why it is that dandelions are considered bad considering they are, at worst, harmless to most people and, at best, useful due to their edibility? Oh, that’s right, somebody decided that yellow and green clashed, and now every douchebag with a lawnmower has decided to jump on the bandwagon so that they could hold their perfectly maintained lawns over their inferior neighbors’ heads.

    FYI suburban lawn Nazis, a whole field of nothing but fucking dandelions would be less harmful to the health of people and the environment than your patch of pristine, chemically treated grass leeching toxins into the water table.

    And by the way everybody, I have just decided that I hate all flowering plants. You must remove them from your property because I consider them to be weeds.

    May 2, 2015 at 6:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #37.1   Haterade

      And by the way everybody, I have just decided that I hate all flowering plants. You must remove them from your property because I consider them to be weeds.

      Funny you say that. I, on the other hand, have just decided that all non-flowering plants are weeds and must be removed forthwith.

      May 3, 2015 at 12:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #38   SparkyRell

    Geez, some people are a bit nuts about their lawns hahaha. The only weeds that I would protest against would be bindiis and paddy melons, because they suck, they don’t have any real point or purpose, they’re assholes of the plant world really, anything else is golden. Some people need to pull the stick out of their arse and relax a bit, it’s only a lawn

    May 2, 2015 at 6:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   Haterade

      I’m not from Australia, so I had to look up the names for a bit of context. Do I understand correctly that bindiis produce something like the burrs (tiny barbed caltrops) that plagued my shoeless childhood, and prickly paddy melons can be poisonous (while their more docile cousins are known as pie melons)?

      I know that on fark.com one running joke is that in Australia most of the wildlife is out to kill you in some form or fashion, but it’s starting to sound more like there’s a grain of truth in it. (^_~)

      May 3, 2015 at 12:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.2   Jami

      From what I can tell from what the Australians on Tumblr say the only deadly thing Australia does not have is a volcano.

      May 3, 2015 at 2:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.3   Lita bang

      Pretty much, Jami.

      If I may bring up a despicable American weed: bindweed. Chokes everything else off. Damn near impossible to get rid of. Very good at tangling round one’s feet and tripping them up. No, I’m not clumsy. :P

      May 4, 2015 at 9:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.4   L

      Wild morning glory can be a bit annoying, too. Very invasive.

      May 4, 2015 at 8:26 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.5   SparkyRell

      Yes indeed Haterade, not to mention some nasty varieties of said bindiis can leave you with a skin infection instead of just a sore foot. You’re right about the melons, plus they spread like wildfire, and no one wants to have paddies in their crop.

      Ah man, gardening over here is fun, until you discover something nasty and potentially dangerous and have to either kill it or avoid gardening for a while. I just ended up spending the rest of my afternoon mowing the lawn in an attempt to stop kangaroos hanging round in my yard. Thought I wouldn’t have to deal with it while living in a capital city, but it turns out I’m wrong.

      May 6, 2015 at 7:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.6   magicdomino

      English Ivy. Oh sure, you think you are pulling it up. But then all of those roots start growing again. Want to go nuclear on it with Round-up? Hah. Ivy laughs at Round-up. It giggles at the heavier duty herbicides like Brush-Be-Gone. Pure concentrate might make the leaves a little brown and crispy.

      It’s invasive. It can bring down trees by growing up and massing in the branches. It can rot the walls of your charming ivy-covered cottage. Pulling ivy off leaves millions of little “feet” attached to the wall. It has no value to wildlife. Supposedly deer eat it, but that must be only if you want to keep the stuff.

      Ivy is evil.

      May 6, 2015 at 3:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.7   Jami

      I found the Round Up designed to kill bushes works well on ivy. And everything else.

      May 6, 2015 at 4:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.8   Charlotte

      We once had a next door neightbour who let Ivy grow up her side of the fences. (We could tell because the occasional bit would squeeze through the slats onto our side). One night there was a slightly higher than usual wind and it caused the whole fence to fall over, which I imagine wasn’t helped by the foot thick layer of Ivy on it. (Our fence on the other side of the garden was fine).

      Jul 9, 2015 at 9:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   WandaCrampton

    Asking questions are in fact pleasant thing if you are not understanding something totally, but this post presents nice understanding yet.

    May 3, 2015 at 2:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   catethulhu

    My lawn looks like shit, and I don’t care. I have more important things to care about than what my neighbors think. Also, we’re in California. It’s totally ridiculous that anyone is watering their grass right now. My neighbors are bad neighbors for wasting my family’s drinking and bathing water on their stupid grass, imo.
    If you’re going to grow anything, grow plants you can eat. At least that water won’t be wasted. This also has the added bonus of the rest of us not killing and eating your water-wasting ass when we’re fighting over resources a la Mad Max.
    Note: that last remark should be regarded as facetiousness for you literal minded peoples.

    May 3, 2015 at 6:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   rushgirl2112

    Without seeing a picture of said yard, I can’t take sides here.

    The note writer seems to indicate that this is more than a few dandelions, which he/she would be fine with. That statement right there leads me to believe that this isn’t a screaming lawn fanatic, none of whom would be tolerant of any number of dandelions.

    On the other hand, what is more than “a few”? We don’t know. I have seen lawns that are literally filled with dandelions, which are exceedingly ugly after they go to seed. And yes, that is considered an eyesore that could affect a neighbor’s home sale, because curb appeal is a big deal.

    I don’t fuss over a few dandelions and never use chemicals of any kind on my yard (I never even water it except in the case of a really bad drought). There is clover, crab grass, and dandelions in it. But even I would not dream of buying a house next to a dandelion field.

    So I don’t know. Without a picture, we can’t know whether the note writer is seriously overreacting or might have a point.

    May 3, 2015 at 7:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #41.1   rushgirl2112

      However, after some experience with such things, I would be much less inclined to move in next to someone with a trumpet vine. Dandelions are a joy compared to those.

      May 3, 2015 at 7:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.2   Poltergeist

      The idea that they are ugly is totally subjective. If a person had a yard of yellow daffodils, would you complain about that? Because they too are relatively harmless yellow flowers, the major difference being they are not referred to as “weeds.”

      And the idea that they spread easily isn’t even a valid complaint. Your yard is always going to be under attack from all kind of plants. Such is the way of nature. If you have any hopes of maintaining a decently green lawn, you will still have to mow and use herbicides/constantly be digging up invading plants regardless of whether or not there is a dandelion field next door.

      If you are selling your house and you really think that your neighbor’s dandelions are that much of an issue, you could politely request they mow down their lawn until you’re done moving. However, they are not obligated to do anything, just like how your neighbor is not obligated to change the color of their house or get rid of their lawn gnomes just because you think it would help sell yours. And if potential buyers are really that disgusted by dandelions, it’s better that they know from the start that their future neighbor likes dandelions anyway.

      May 4, 2015 at 9:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.3   corviddreams

      Here the most invasive weeds have spikes that can puncture tires, not to mention tender feet. I will take a harmless dandelion invasion over that obnoxiousness any day!

      May 6, 2015 at 1:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #42   JustPunkin

    A weed is simply a misplaced flower.

    I spent most of this weekend digging dandelions out of my rocks (i have no idea how they got through the landscaping screen) and in my flower beds. The ones in my yard, well, I mowed them down. They’ll be back today.

    I also have clover. And some blue flower that spreads like crazy.

    I like weeds. They suppress the grass, and I don’t have to mow as often.

    May 4, 2015 at 7:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Gareth

    Dandelion and burdock fizzy cooldrink. That is all.

    May 4, 2015 at 2:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.1   Feather Blade

      Urgh.

      I’m sure the drink is lovely, but burdock is my second least favorite plant in the world. The burs are a nightmare to get out of fur.

      May 8, 2015 at 4:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.2   Jami

      I’d like to try that just once to see what it’s like. Same with dandelion wine.

      I also want to try elderberry wine.

      And whatever beer is actually the most popular with actual Australians that’s made in Australia. Cause I hear Fosters is basically the Australian version of PASBT Blue Ribbon.

      May 9, 2015 at 6:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.3   The Elf

      A friend of a the family makes dandelion wine, and he gave us a bottle. It reminded me of a cross between white wine and sprite.

      May 10, 2015 at 8:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #44   TRT

    Round our way that’s called a flower garden. Seriously. The council has one at the edge of the village. Just dandelions.

    May 5, 2015 at 4:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #44.1   L

      I would die XD

      I am actually mildly allergic to the fluff, but we’re so totally not this bad about them. They get beheaded when the guy mowes our lawn, and that’s it.

      May 5, 2015 at 6:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #45   The Elf

    How did a lawn care PAN generate nearly as many comments as an indoor/outdoor cat PAN?

    May 5, 2015 at 8:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.1   Poltergeist

      I know, amazing right? It probably has to do with people relating to the experience of having conceited busybodies criticizing them for things that aren’t any of their business.

      May 5, 2015 at 9:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #45.2   Kjeri

      If you have pet dandelions, it is your duty to keep them inside. If they are allowed to run wild outside, they will invade your neighbor’s yards and deposit seeds in their sand boxes. Dandelions are statistically the #1 killer of native manicured yard grass in the USA. Also, more and more rogue cows have been sited in suburban settings. They have knows to prey on dandelions. So for the love of all that is holy, keep the little hellions inside!!! You never know when a neighbor will take things into their own hands! :o

      May 5, 2015 at 9:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #45.3   Kjeri

      If you have pet dandelions, it is your duty to keep them inside. If they are allowed to run wild outside, they will invade your neighbor’s yards and deposit seeds in their sand boxes. Dandelions are statistically the #1 killer of native manicured yard grass in the USA. Also, more and more rogue cows have been sited in suburban settings. They have knows to prey on dandelions. So for the love of all that is holy, keep the little hellions inside!!! It is illegal to let your dandelions roam free! You would never let your Rubber Plant off leash outside, would you?

      May 5, 2015 at 9:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #45.4   Haterade

      Not to mention you have to worry about horrible psychopaths like this guy…

      (Warning: Sensitive viewers and small dandelions should leave the room)

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIDi9kkvDIw

      May 5, 2015 at 12:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #46   Kjeri

    Sorry about the duplication. I wanted to edit the first but the site wouldn’t let me so I told it to delete it and it wouldn’t. >: E

    May 5, 2015 at 1:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Rumtopf

    I like my lawn. Lots of different grasses, dandelions!!1, clover, tons of moss(seriously walking barefoot on the mossy parts is awesome), daisies, wild pansies, violets, buttercups, cowslip, wild plantain, cornflowers, forget-me-nots, tiny and a bunch of other stuff. It’s nice to sit out there with some coffee and watch the insects and birds enjoying themselves. We also get hedgehogs and foxes visiting at night, as well as bats(also fun to watch in the summer just as it’s getting dark), so yeah I’m down with having a wildlife friendly garden.

    May 5, 2015 at 2:31 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #47.1   pooham

      That sounds so beautiful Rumtopf! Where is it that you live to have such a variety of flora and fauna?

      May 5, 2015 at 6:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #48   Fritz-the-Cat

    The solution to the spreading of dandelions (which they do, no two ways about it) is easy:

    Just mow the lawn before they start to seed.

    That way, you get pretty flowers and your neighbour doesn’t have to bother with pretty flowers if he/she doesn’t want them.
    But I suspect that this is one of those strange, weird American suburb-things (just suspicion, no facts for that) and it’s NOT about the spreading but more about how ‘horrible’ it looks. Like that weird-ass horror American suburbians encounter when they see clothes airdrying on a washing-line.

    Sometimes, I’m really effing glad I live in Europe where the land you own is YOURS. You’re not allowed to shoot trespassers, but on the other hand nobody is allowed to tell you how to keep your garden.

    May 6, 2015 at 9:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #48.1   Jami

      The problem here is money.

      If your neighbor’s house is “ugly” it drives property values down for everyone near by. Which can also affect your home insurance rates. You could live in a multi-million dollar home and have it not worth half of that because a neighbor or two have rusty cars and weeds in their front yard and their house hasn’t been painted since 1973.

      May 6, 2015 at 4:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #48.2   corviddreams

      Your property values are not your neighbor’s problem. If it bothers you that much, go over and offer to help them weed. If you are trying to sell a multi-million dollar home and it makes that much difference in the selling price, offer to pain the damned house. It would probably work better than leaving a PAN, right?

      May 7, 2015 at 6:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #48.3   Feather Blade

      Just mow the lawn before they start to seed.

      That works until the plants start growing their blooms low to the ground, below the level of the lawnmower blades.

      In my experience, it takes about two mowings before a given plant will stop growing tall stems.

      May 8, 2015 at 4:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #48.4   Haterade

      Generally speaking, point taken. But if you live in a multi-million dollar home in the US, chances are the city will ask you “How high?” in midair.

      (Unless your neighbor is rich enough to be “eccentric” and doesn’t give a crap what anyone thinks. If you’re still determined to make them tow the rust buckets, say “Hi” to years of wasting your time in the best justice system money can buy.)

      May 12, 2015 at 2:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
    • #48.5   Jami

      There’s always the chance they could be protected under a grandfather clause as well. We had a guy named Sid Soffer in our neighborhood who had a ton of rusty old cars in his yard. At least once a year the city would come in, tow all the cars away, and take him away in a straight jacket. Then a day or two he and his cars would be back cause he was protected under a grandfather clause.

      He didn’t leave until he got charged with being a slum lord. Died of stomach cancer in another state.

      May 12, 2015 at 9:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #49   Matt Nelson

    Suddenly I’m so glad I live in an apartment and don’t have to bother with lawn care. I hate plants. Pave it all. :D

    May 6, 2015 at 11:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   JoDa

    I don’t really enjoy the look of dandelions, but I like being able to use my lawn regularly (i.e., it’s not a hazard zone from chemicals for one week a month), and I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars on maintenance, so I do what most sane people I think do: I pluck the heads off of them when I take the dog out. No seeds that way. It won’t totally eliminate the problem because there are some truly overgrown properties nearby, but it limits the issue a bit. As easy as bending over, and I leave the flower head there in case any local wildlife wants to use it as a snack.

    May 8, 2015 at 12:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
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  • #52   Singe

    Dandelions are pretty. :(

    May 11, 2015 at 8:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   nature is best!

    Dandelions are edible! Stop polluting our lawns, and our water systems! We use to feed our guinea pig pesticide free dandelion leaves from the yard. Dandelion jelly is very tasty too! We need to get back to nature, our roots, and stop being so materialistic and damaging.

    May 14, 2015 at 9:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #53.1   wiesoauchimmer

      I LOVE dandelion jelly! I would make it all the time if it wasn’t SO much work!

      May 15, 2015 at 10:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

       
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