Song of the PANflute

October 1st, 2015 · 36 comments

After a week-long “concert series” carried through the building’s heating system, Brad in Montreal says one of his fellow apartment-dwellers posted this desperate plea.

If you're in this building, Fucking PANFLUTE, STOP!!! Please! I beg you, stop!

related: And when I jam, I jam loud

FILED UNDER: Montreal · music


36 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Mark

    Obligatory Toothpaste for Dinner.

    Also, does anyone remember latenight commercials for Zamfir?

    Oct 1, 2015 at 6:30 pm   rating: 92  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   C

      But… But I *like* pan pipes.

      Oct 1, 2015 at 9:15 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Britva

      zamphir, MASTER of the pan flute!

      Oct 1, 2015 at 10:36 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Dave S

      Well according to Wikipedia, while Zamfir lives in Bucharest, his son is also a musician and lives in Montreal! Maybe he’s practicing to continue his father’s legacy?

      Ain’t no party like a pan flute party, ’cause a pan flute party don’t stop!!

      Oct 5, 2015 at 4:47 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Arathael

    omg
    I love this.
    Very to the point!

    Oct 1, 2015 at 9:26 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Oqlf

    If it’s not in French, it doesn’t exist.

    No one should have to give deux mardes.

    Carry on with thy lovely panfluting, cher concitoyen!

    Oct 1, 2015 at 10:50 pm   rating: 92  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Jessi

      Don’t you mean “merdes”?

      Oct 1, 2015 at 11:18 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Oqlf

      Uch. Clearly you don’t speak Québécois.

      Heathen.

      Oct 2, 2015 at 12:08 am   rating: 92  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   magpie

    Quebecois isn’t French. It’s a stupid-sounding desecration of French.

    Oct 2, 2015 at 1:34 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   eagle

      Just like ‘murican is a stupid sounding desecration of English?

      Oct 2, 2015 at 1:52 pm   rating: 92  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Nightmane

      Oh yes, perish the thought that languages separated by an ocean evolve! Putain de merde, je saisis mes perles!

      Oct 9, 2015 at 2:43 am   rating: 93  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Oqlf

      Ostie d’crisse de tabarnak!

      Oct 26, 2015 at 3:41 pm   rating: 92  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   The Elf

    In defense of the notewriter, it would probably sound better if the neighbor PLAYED the panflute instead of FUCKED it.

    Oct 2, 2015 at 8:05 am   rating: 92  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Haterade

      I wish I could remember the source of a quote that went something like “A human male can copulate with almost anything that has two legs and stays reasonably still long enough”.

      They appear to have been incorrect about the leg requirement.

      Oct 2, 2015 at 12:58 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Lita bang

      This one time at band camp…

      Oct 2, 2015 at 6:58 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   knitchic

      Not sure if I’m impressed or underwhelmed that he can do that to a pan flute. Seems like it would chafe in any case.

      Oct 6, 2015 at 7:52 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Scotty

    The quintessential passive/aggressive note.
    In this case, “aggressive/passive”!

    Oct 2, 2015 at 11:41 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   The Beast Among Us

    Sex must be so worrisome in that building.

    Oct 2, 2015 at 2:06 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Lita bang

      People at least want to hear that.

      Oct 2, 2015 at 7:06 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Monty

    At a Large Seattle Coffee Company, we used to have a guy who would sit outside the HQ and play his recorder for hours. You’d just hear these flimsy, out-of-tune flooty-tooty sounds drifting around the veranda, clients and visiting mucky-mucks be damned, everyone’s getting a recorder recital. Flooty-tooty toot.

    Oct 3, 2015 at 2:05 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Jami

      Did he happen to have a bowl hair cut, sit near a police box, hang out with a Scottish kid, and answer to the name Doctor?

      Oct 3, 2015 at 5:31 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   Poltergeist

      I work at an elementary school, and the music teacher’s army of recorders has recently been bestowed upon the second graders. I want to kill myself.

      Oct 4, 2015 at 2:30 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   kermit

      Monty, I think you’re overlooking the brilliance of the guy’s strategy.

      Most (foolish) street musicians think that if they play really really well, the passers by will be touched and throw them some change for providing such pleasant music.

      Flooty Tooty guy probably knowingly was creating a racket and telling people that he’ll stop only if people give him change.

      Oct 6, 2015 at 4:11 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   the cat

      Or as a mariachi band wandering among the street cafes of Guadalahara offered “Cinco por serenada, diez por silencio”. Amazing how many people handed them 10 pesos (about $1.50).

      Oct 6, 2015 at 2:25 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   labdude

      I had a friend whose goal was to build a genuine steam-powered calliope on the back of a flat-bed truck and then play it in local parades.
      I suggested a better application was to park it near some public venue and play it until someone paid him to leave…

      Oct 7, 2015 at 3:50 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   The Elf

      Genius!

      Oct 8, 2015 at 7:32 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Eohippus

    I think by day three I would have hunted them down, beat them stupid with their compost barrel, and then filled their sink with all their quinoa and patchouli before smothering them in it. Or blasting Reagan’s speeches through the vents as a form a psychological warfare.

    Oct 9, 2015 at 2:02 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Jami

      I’ve always found opera the best deterrent for loud noise and/or music. Specifically The Song Of The Golden Calf from Faust. There’s something about a baritone playing the demon Mephistopheles, singing in French, played extremely loudly with the speakers aimed at them that really gives people the idea they need to knock it the fuck off.

      Oct 9, 2015 at 5:37 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   assiveProgressive

    So, I’m taking a walk today at a park along the Chesapeake Bay in Virginia, and I hear … bagpipes. I follow the sound, and there is an Asian lady strolling along a boardwalk in the forest playing something or other on the bagpipes.

    Oct 10, 2015 at 6:58 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Eohippus

      @assiveProgressive That sort of find has got to be an instant win for some sort of drinking game.

      Oct 10, 2015 at 8:36 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   assiveProgressive

    I didn’t know whether to compliment her or go drown myself

    Oct 12, 2015 at 12:31 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   f

    how is this passive aggressive?

    Dec 11, 2015 at 8:26 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   jon

    Top 10 Funny Moments in Bundesliga History Advent Calendar 2015 Number 22
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSKAxzLCPgk&spfreload=10

    Dec 25, 2015 at 2:46 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Name Stylish

    I love pan pipes :)

    Jan 20, 2016 at 9:07 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   sandmakercrusher

    I didn’t know whether to compliment her or go drown myself

    Jan 20, 2016 at 9:18 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

     
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    Jan 25, 2016 at 6:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up