Pro tip: if the sound of children’s laughter on a Sunday afternoon makes you curse the sky in rage, you might want to check yourself before you turn into a full-fledged cartoon villain. It might be too late for the “concerned” notewriter below.
related: That means you, young man!
FILED UNDER: kids
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198 responses so far ↓
#1
Rae
Notice it says “screams” and not “laughter in the note” Kids playing outside is a good thing, and I have no problem with kids laughing, and even yelling to each other across the yard or neighborhood.
But there totally are kids who scream for no reason. Ear-splitting, worse than nails on a chalkboard, make your ears bleed Scream. And that is totally not ok. This note was kind of ridiculous, and the point could have been made a lot better, but asking parents to teach their kids not to scream bloody murder is perfectly reasonable.
Not only does it allow people to enjoy their own outside space on nice days, but if a child is taught not to scream unless its an emergency , and then they Do start screaming, the responsible adults know they better start running to see what’s wrong.
Oct 13, 2015 at 8:48 am rating: 103
#2
CN
I happen to live by a family of screamers with a trampoline (without a safety net). It’s not happy yells as they jump. It’s the ear splitting, “i’ve fallen and broken my neck” screams constantly. It’s hard to ignore and it’s annoying as heck that no one has taught the kids that this isn’t okay to scream like that because people will think something is wrong. I wouldn’t leave a note but I’ve seriously considered talking to their parents who have yet to seem to notice this goes on or ever check on them when they are outside.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:05 am rating: 95
#3
Motown_Kim
But they’re using their “outside voices”.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:06 am rating: 91
#4
Belaani
Start throwing taffy over the fence – so hard to scream when your teeth are stuck together.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:06 am rating: 91
#5
idrow
The people next door and across the street from me let their kids do this and it makes me insane. It’s like a kettle whistle on crack scream that makes me want to jam an oyster fork in my ear. I’m forced to close my windows on nice days and I still hear it. I hate these people. I’ve been on the verge of going outside and yelling “shut the f*** up!!!” several times. I know I’m going to crack one day.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:31 am rating: 95
#6
Lil'
This is the most out-to-lunch thing I’ve ever read. I think if this person has the time to sit and document something to this extent, they need to find something to fill the void in their life. Even before I had children, the sound of children playing outdoors never bothered me, but I hate crap like this. I would rather live next to the screaming kids than the note writer. I know a guy who wrote a certified letter, and included highlighted community covenants, threatening to report his new right-next-door-neighbors because their dog used his lawn. A simple, “hey man” would have sufficed.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:51 am rating: 93
#7
Jami
Yeah, I’m on the letter writer’s side. Unless the kids are being murdered or something like that there’s no excuse for them to scream.
Though I’d just call the non-emergency police number and say “Hey, the kids next door are screaming and have been all day. I don’t know what’s going on but it doesn’t sound good.” Forget the letter, go straight for the cops.
Oct 13, 2015 at 9:52 am rating: 93
#8
NoAdditives
I have four kids (2-almost 7 years old). Guess what? Kids scream. They do it when they’re happy, they do it when they’re hurt, they do it for no reason. Sure, it’s annoying. Yes, good parents do what they can to stifle their child’s urge to scream. But, good parents also know the difference between their child’s screams. Practical parents know it’s not possible to correct every single insurance of undesirable behavior. So yeah, it might be annoying, but kids are allowed to play outside and some amount of freedom. Get over it. Kids, even annoying ones, are a part of the world.
Oct 13, 2015 at 10:16 am rating: 90
#9
Belinda
Clearly this parent was so sick to death of dealing with screaming that she kicked her kids out. Screaming is one of the few acts of resistance available to children and they make copious use of it. How do you stop a child from screaming without… I don’t know, using force?? Choking them?? Think about it, people. They age out of it pretty quickly in the long view. Let it go.
Oct 13, 2015 at 10:17 am rating: 90
#10
Eohippus
I’m pretty much the Grinch personified, and I flat out don’t like kids, but the letter writer is a giant bag of crazy. I hope they call the cops so they can explain why they’re out monitoring strange children. Neighbors like that are why I’m glad I live in the country where the nearest house is a mile away.
Oct 13, 2015 at 10:36 am rating: 90
#11
GG
I empathize — when I was a (normal, well-behaved) kid, a family with two young boys moved in next to us and they would literally SCREAM incessantly, and were in the backyard all the time, and it made life pretty awful. There’s a big difference between kids making noise when playing and constant screaming.
Oct 13, 2015 at 11:18 am rating: 92
#12
nightsmusic
We live next door to a couple who have their grandchildren almost every weekend. The little girl SCREAMS constantly when she’s outside and if the weather is decent, she’s always outside. Last weekend, I hear her screaming, “HELP ME!! HELP ME!!” We are on three acres and so are they and it sounded like nails on a blackboard under my window, not to mention though my kids are grown, that instinct to protect still works. So I went barreling out the front door and across the front porch, only to see her standing by the back of their house, squirting herself with a hose and screaming, “HELP ME!! HELP ME!!!” Every. Single. Time! the water hit her.
No one pays attention to the kids and one of these days, she’s going to scream help me for real and no one will ever know what happened.
Yes, I know kids scream. I had two. But I also took the time to teach them that shouting when playing and screaming to wake the dead are two entirely different things and if they ever really needed help, it would never come if they couldn’t tell the difference.
More power to the letter writer (though it’s a tad overboard as far as detail…)
Oct 13, 2015 at 11:40 am rating: 94
#13
Tern
I’m for team note writer, though a friendly conversation would be a better first step. I have kids, and occasional yells outside are a normal part of play. Constant screaming is not. I always told the kids that if they screamed I would assume they were hurt and take appropriate action, including ending whatever activity was going on.
Also, just because it’s outside does not mean it doesn’t bother people. Sure, it’s expected that louder noise is ok outside. But there are limits.
Oct 13, 2015 at 11:50 am rating: 92
#14
hbc
Is “assistance” code for “a paddlin’”? Because clearly the kids don’t actually “need assistance” if they’re still conscious and have breath to scream after five minutes. Even a three year old with a broken leg or a bleeding gash would have dragged himself up to the house by that point, or at least screamed something specific.
Either complain about their noisiness bugging you or express concern for what *could* happen with them unattended. Not even a helicopter parent would think there are 24 intervention-worthy events in a five minute period.
Oct 13, 2015 at 12:27 pm rating: 91
#15
bekbek
I think it’s perfectly reasonable to think that these kids might actually be having fun. For some kids, there is no difference in the sound between shrieks of joy and shrieks of anguish.
This is also in the space of a very short time. The note writer sounds like they have a stick up their butt. It doesn’t say, “Lady, your kids are screaming outside for three hours every day.” This sounds like it is one afternoon.
Personally, I try to be vigilant about the noise level of my kids, even when they’re outside. But sometimes, I do things like go to the bathroom and realize I need to poop. Then my kids might scream in my backyard without me realizing it. You know what it usually is? An effing yellow jacket that they are convinced is trying to kill them. Yes, I already went outside and sprayed every hive thoroughly. Those motherlickers are dead. But there are still some that fly around because, outside. I think my kids must think they will die if one stings them because they flip out (even though one has been stung before and even admits it was no big deal).
Sometimes kids scream when they’re happy; sometimes kids scream about stupid things; sometimes parents have their kids go outside, so they can have a break; yes, kids are freaking annoying, my kids are annoying. I’m sorry if they annoy you sometimes, but you know, a lot of adult people are annoying, too. Kids are still learning how to be people, and sometimes (mosttimes) they make questionable choices. You can’t expect strict parental control at all times.
I don’t even know why I’m writing all this crap. It just pisses me off that there is this level of judgement for a mom whose kids are screaming outside. I hear kids screaming while they’re playing from another neighborhood from my backyard because kids screaming while they play is very common.
Oct 13, 2015 at 12:33 pm rating: 90
#16
The Elf
I’m not crazy about the dulcet sounds of children either – that’s on the long list of reasons why I don’t have any – but damn, this is excessive. As long as the “screaming” isn’t during extremely late or early hours, or right outside your window (unless your window faces a tot lot or something) it’s just to be expected. Close your windows and play some music and try not to be such a asshole.
Oct 13, 2015 at 1:34 pm rating: 91
#17
Lita
Living near this neighbor is clearly a scream.
Oct 13, 2015 at 1:47 pm rating: 90
#18
phoenix
I think a big part of this is how close the kids are to their neighbors. If you’re in a subdivision with yards…eh. If you’re like me, and live in an apartment building with a tiny lot outside, the screaming neighbors “outside” are literally a foot from your windows. They’d be farther away inside their own apartment.
So yeah, a lot of this is dependent on your living situation. Kids in neighborhoods should be expected, if you’re a third-shift working joe in a crap apartment, your tolderance for children screaming in joypain on a sunday afternoon starts to tank.
Oct 13, 2015 at 1:48 pm rating: 90
#19
Keri
I totally get that all the screaming may be very annoying, and honestly, I would probably be on the side of the note writer, except for one thing: they write it in such a condescending, “I’m only doing this because I care about the kids” manner. Even if you don’t have the guts to just go next door and ask the parents to please try to quiet the children and need to write a note, just state “Your kids are screaming and it’s driving me nuts.” Don’t try to phrase it in a “Your children are obviously not old enough to be playing in the backyard by themselves, and I’m just so concerned I had to write this note.” To me, THAT is what makes this a passive-aggressive note.
Oct 13, 2015 at 3:06 pm rating: 90
#20
Jaynor05
Children’s Screams…. are fucking delicious.
Oct 13, 2015 at 3:20 pm rating: 91
#21
av
The parents should totally give these notes to their children and have them color and draw happy pictures on them. Maybe even instruct them to draw pictures of the sad neighbors in a delightful manner, with big happy smiles. Then, deliver them back to the neighbor.
Hehe, have a nice day
Oct 13, 2015 at 4:08 pm rating: 90
#22
Amy
Kids yell and scream. Dogs bark. People yell and scream. Music and TV is played too loud.
It doesn’t mean any of this should be allowed to happen excessively to disrupt the neighbors quality of life.
My city has an ordinance that says if basically you can hear it from the street, you can get a ticket – WITHOUT a warning first. This applies to loud music, piano/musical instrument practice, yelling/screaming, barking dogs, TV, chain saws, lawn mowers, etc. Noise is in the ears of the human having to listen to it. Let’s face it, lawn mowers and equipment can’t be helped and they don’t go on, and on, and on!
I have a neighbor behind me that has the WORST child. Their youngest screams for no reason (not kidding – NO reason). I think there might be a mental issue, but after about an hour of it, I just want her to go inside and scream – I didn’t have the kid they did. Forget being in my yard, I hear her inside my house with my windows closed.
Their older child (which I think only visits during the summer) was shooting water over the fence with a soaker gun (the kind that can go >30′).
I started noticing my dogs would start barking every time he was outside (which they are not outside unless I am home – and I can’t stand barking). He got the shock of his life when it was ME in the backyard instead of the dogs one day. The 12 year old was even more shocked when I knocked on their front door about 5 minutes later to let the parents know what he was doing.
Oct 13, 2015 at 4:41 pm rating: 92
#23
Dave
I think it’s time for someone to consider moving out to “Golden Acres” where the kids are banned.
Oct 13, 2015 at 5:35 pm rating: 90
#24
Raichu
The tone of the note is obnoxious and over the top in a major way. But it’s not NEARLY as obnoxious as nonstop screaming.
Team note writer.
Oct 13, 2015 at 6:41 pm rating: 91
#25
Jill
I LOVE that so many people are on the note writer’s side. I’m glad I’m not the only person out there who would do something to get them to shut it.
My neighbors have 3 dogs that bark constantly, sometimes as early as 6:30 AM and as late as 11:30 PM. It’s not okay when they do it, and it’s not okay when kids do it. And sure as hell, once I hatch my child, he/she will never think that that sort of behavior is okay.
Oct 13, 2015 at 7:29 pm rating: 92
#26
sepaz
Instead of going to all the trouble of the PA letter + screaming data, neighbor should have just yelled commandingly over the fence. E.g., “You kids quit that screaming or I’ll call the sheriff/the police/the HOA president/your father!”
Always worked in our ‘hood.
Oct 13, 2015 at 11:25 pm rating: 91
#27
Furubafan74
Team Notewriter. 24 screams over a span of five minutes is unacceptable. 24 screams over the course of an hour-maybe. But five minutes? Oh Hell no.
Oct 14, 2015 at 1:07 am rating: 93
#28
nobody
As a parent of 2 young kids (18 months and 3) I don’t like it either when they scream for no reason so I teach them not to do it. It does takes a lot of constance and reminder at the beginning. My 18 months is still kind of young but he knows it’s not right so he’s doing it a lot less than before. From experience I believe it’s all a question of education and what you are willing to do to achieve the desired result. Sure, most parents won’t bother to do the “right” thing and will just do the “easy” thing AKA do nothing.
Oct 14, 2015 at 7:01 am rating: 94
#29
Chris Baker
I guess I am the type of person who can tune/out ignore sounds. Lawn mowers, dogs barking, etc. Yes, if someone points it out, then I can’t help but notice it, but after a while, I just ignore it. (Or maybe it’s just all the voices in my head that drown them out?)
Anyway, there are some people who hear a repetitive noise and just can’t help but focus on it and obsess over it and just can’t let it go.
How about some ear buds and some nice music or a podcast to listen to? That will tune out the sounds.
Oct 14, 2015 at 11:59 am rating: 90
#30
Haterade
I really would like to believe the note recipient in this story has a secret motive they can’t share, something more altruistic than “I don’t consider others’ eardrums, sleep, and/or sanity to be as important as my kids’ right to scream constantly and my right to not have to put in the effort to teach them they shouldn’t.”
So I’ve decided that their dad is actually Batman, and they’re practicing echolocation.
Sure, they may drive the notewriter and the rest of the neighborhood crazy now… but in twenty years, everyone will be glad they did. You can never have too many superheroes.
Oct 14, 2015 at 12:31 pm rating: 91
#31
Marcus
My top tip to deal with this effectively: Start keeping bees.
Oct 15, 2015 at 5:43 am rating: 92
#32
Stella3
You know what? I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that the note writer enjoyed making that note. Most of us would be content with a note that said “Your kids have been screaming a lot, and it’s annoying to us, your neighbors.”
But this note writer had the time to sit down and record the exact seconds between each scream, and then neatly type them up. This looks like the work of an experienced passive-aggressive-note writer, one who takes great pride in his/her handiwork.
Oct 15, 2015 at 6:44 pm rating: 90
#33
Sam
Never has the PAN team seemed so totally out of touch with the real world. Kids screaming is not an unavoidable part of human development as some parental comments above insist; and is obviously totally different to the sound of children laughing.
Oct 17, 2015 at 1:29 am rating: 92
#34
Mel
Hate to say it, but I feel the neighbors pain. I don’t have and don’t want kids. But to hear them scream makes my brain want to explode.
Oct 17, 2015 at 3:44 am rating: 92
#35
Juniper
Scream back . Seriously. The kids will likely take no notice but the parents probably will. And when they ask what you’re doing, reply with total seriousness that as they seem to think everyone enjoys listening to screaming, you’d thought you’d join in.
Oct 17, 2015 at 9:37 am rating: 93
#36
Cate
I made my kids come inside if they screamed. They learned pretty quickly not to do it. (The oldest on is now 20 -these weren’t the dark ages). I told them that screaming was unfair to the neighbors. It can be done.
Oct 17, 2015 at 4:14 pm rating: 93
#37
L
If they actually are screaming, then it needs to stop. (Although as someone who works with kids, even if you think your kids aren’t screaming, they probably are, just not around you, lol.)
But even 5 minutes is not constant screaming, and anyone who’s gonna sit down and record their neighbour’s children is someone whose judgement I do not trust. Maybe they are calling laughter screaming. (Little girls especially can get rather high pitched when laughing.)
Personally, I’ve lived next door to a park, and I’ve lived next door to a drug dealer. The park was better.
Oct 18, 2015 at 2:18 pm rating: 90
#38
The Beast Among Us
“If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.”
-Jack Handey
Oct 20, 2015 at 4:11 pm rating: 92
#39
MBee
I don’t know if I can share a link here, but did anyone see the story that was headlined…
Woman Allegedly Threatens to Lick, Taste Family`s Children
http://news.yahoo.com/video/woman-allegedly-threatens-lick-taste-161012379.html
Oct 22, 2015 at 12:52 pm rating: 91
#40
selene
Being a science teacher, I would get out my red pen and edit the note to show the proper methodologies that needed to be followed. Among others: 1. Quantitatively define a “scream”-decibel levels and such. 2. Define subject matter- how many kids, what different screams? 3. Take repeated samplings over multiple times of day and days of the week. 4. Identify any parental interventions and the effect. Etc. Don’t tell me you’re going to Science and then Science incorrectly. ^_^
Oct 24, 2015 at 12:07 pm rating: 91
#41
TRT
Record it and then play it back when they’re trying to get some peace and quiet. When they come to complain, explain what you’ve done.
Oct 26, 2015 at 11:40 am rating: 91
#42
Belaani
For Christ’s sake, will someone please submit a new P/A note? This is seriously bogged down!
Oct 28, 2015 at 10:27 am rating: 90
#43
Lita
I’ve just been forced to entertain a Wii-obsessed, doesn’t-listen-to-anything, extremely shrill, will-not-leave-cats-alone-even-when-told-multiple-times four year old.
I still have to entertain her all day today.
I think I sympathize with the notewriter Very Much right now.
Oct 29, 2015 at 1:03 pm rating: 92
#44
Canadian Brad
Dear neighbour,
I’m not sure why you didn’t choose to talk to me directly during these events, unless your goal was to feature on a website dedicated to ridiculous notes left for neighbours and co-workers(if so, congratulations).
However, if you’d care to stop by and explain your concerns with me allowing my children to play relatively unsupervised within the safety of my backyard, on a beautiful weekend afternoon, I will certainly explain how I have no fucks to give.
Sincerely,
Canadian Brad
Nov 1, 2015 at 8:56 pm rating: 90
#45
Rattus
On another note entirely, if this site has gone moribund, I wish someone would have the courtesy to pop in and post a note (passive-aggressive or otherwise) to that effect so that I can recalibrate my time-wasting radar.
Nov 4, 2015 at 9:59 am rating: 90
#46
Stella3
I really think that kids screaming is less annoying than a lot of the other sounds I have to put up with from neighbors. I’m going to guess that the screaming was taking place on some lazy afternoon, and not in the middle of the night when one is trying to sleep.
Nov 9, 2015 at 2:39 pm rating: 90
#47
Missy
Let me get real here. I don’t want to live in a community where screams for help are ignored because people have become conditioned to tune them out, rather than the screaming children having parents that parent their child. I was a child once. I did not scream. I went away to college and was sexually assaulted because no one TEN FEET AWAY around a corner in the dorm lobby could hear my screams for help because of silly 18-year-old girls shrieking for no reason. DON’T DO IT. PARENT YOUR CHILD.
I now live in an apartment complex where I often am trying to decide if I should run to the assistance of girls blood-curdling screams as if they are being abducted/molested/raped/dismembered but it turns out they and their parents are inconsiderate horrible people.
Nov 11, 2015 at 8:32 am rating: 94
#48
Nics
The letter writer has every right to feel p*ssed off with the noise! Kids do scream when they’re playing and it does peoples’ heads in. To mum and/or dad it might be the most beautiful sound they ever heard… to everyone else it’s like slow torture, gives them a headache and leaves them unable to concentrate on whatever they’re doing… QUIETLY!! These parents need to make their kids play more quietly and stop screaming indiscriminately.
Nov 26, 2015 at 1:21 pm rating: 93
#49
Scantronacon
“but for your childrens well being”?? That sounds like a threat like he’ll give something to scream about. Kids are annoying sometimes, whats irritating to me about adults is they act they were freaking born like this! Like wow
Jan 6, 2016 at 12:43 pm rating: 90
#50
A.K.
Kids scream. Deal with it.
Jan 19, 2016 at 7:56 am rating: 90
#51
cupcake
We are having this exact problem at my house. The house that backs up to my next door neighbours house has three kids who spill out into the backyard at 7am on Saturday and Sunday mornings. The screams are ear splitting. The two girls just scream. Top of your lungs screaming. Every. Few. Seconds. For the last three years!!
We can no longer enjoy sitting in the backyard after work. Weekend mornings are ruined. Saturday afternoon also. They are out there screaming, just screaming. Nothing but screams.
This morning it was 6.56am when it started. It is freaking hot in Brisbane even now in Spring. Everyone sleeps with their windows open and the screams just pierce the quiet like a knife.
I nearly walked out in my nightie to yell at them to STFU. I can’t take it anymore. So i totally understand this note.
Oct 21, 2016 at 7:23 pm rating: 1
#52
KONG
3 OPTIONS: 1. A ‘pair’ needs to be grown 2. Earplugs cost approx. $2.50 & up (counterfeit/generic brands cost even less at .99¢ Stores & Dollar Tree) 3. Close doors/Shut windows and repeat after me, “WOOSAH!” — again, “Woosah!!”
May 24, 2017 at 11:51 am rating: 0
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