Stand down, wedding guests

July 17th, 2014 · 100 comments

Spotted at a wedding in Texas. Says our submitter, “The food was BBQ. The DJ never made the announcement for seconds.”

Stand down, wedding guests

 

related: The bride will be accepting gifts

→ 100 CommentsFILED UNDER: food · Texas · weddings and bridezillas


In the news: Passive-aggressive watermelon carving?

July 15th, 2014 · 43 comments

Butcher Knife in Watermelon

A Connecticut man was arrested last night for allegedly slicing a watermelon in a passive-aggressive manner. According to the police report, the woman said she felt the man was resorting to “passive-aggressive” tactics to “intimidate her because he is angry at her.” According to the Register-Citizen:

The woman…was greeted by the sight of a watermelon, pierced by Cervillino’s large butcher knife, sitting on the kitchen counter top, police said. Cervillino walked in seconds later, and without saying anything, began slicing pieces of the watermelon.

Now, this site is notoriously loose in our working definition of “passive-aggressive,” but I’d call that just plain menacing. How about you?

(Thanks to Matt in D.C. for tipping us off to the story, and to Michael Kappel on Flickr for the photo!)

related: “Watermelon, watermelon, mofo, watermelon” will not work anymore

 

→ 43 CommentsFILED UNDER: Connecticut · more aggressive than passive


The taking tree

July 10th, 2014 · 54 comments

Our submitter lives in a group of eight cottages in Alameda, California. She writes: “One of my neighbors, Mark, has a lemon tree and he always tells everyone to ‘Help themselves!’ However, last week, someone took the last lemon — which really upset Mark. A couple hours later, we noticed what looked like a peach on the lemon tree.”

The Taking Tree

related: The right to bear fruit

→ 54 CommentsFILED UNDER: California · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · neighbors


But what does the fox say?

July 8th, 2014 · 87 comments

Writes Kate in Pensacola, Florida: “There’s a new subdivision going up near me, and the farmer next door is NOT happy about it.”

NOTICE: This property is a farm Farms have animals. Animals make: Funny sounds Smell bad, and Have sex outdoors UNLESS YOU CAN TOLERATE Noise, Odors, and Outdoor sex DON'T BUY PROPERTY NEXT TO A FARM!

(And then, of course, there’s the city version…)

related: Oh, the rancher and the McMansioner should be friends

→ 87 CommentsFILED UNDER: Florida · horses, cows, & chickens


The sins of the father

July 3rd, 2014 · 67 comments

Kyle didn’t even want to open the card he got from his grandma for his 20th birthday, because he knew he was in for something more than $5 bill. “The week prior was my family reunion, and my dad decided not to go — and not to inform my grandma ahead of time,” Kyle says. Grandma decided to use Kyle’s birthday card to make her feelings about this clear.

The sins of the father

related: Thanks, Grandma. Really.

→ 67 CommentsFILED UNDER: birthday · Grandma · guilt trip · Minnesota · sad face