Says Lem in Queensland, Australia: “Everyone at my local council always says they’re super busy. I figure it’s because they’re ‘busy’ creating extra signs to put up around the office.”

related: More passive-aggressive flowcharts

Says our submitter in Melbourne: “This one is just classic — even the mistakes are soooo typical!”

related: The Orchid Thief

Spotted by our submitter at his local pub in Australia. (The wheelchair-accessible toilet is about 5 feet closer to the bar.)

related: Going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras? 

Our submitter in Townsville, Australia says that Christmas decorating season is in full swing.Unfortunately, all those strings of lights have set off a string of front-yard vandalism as well. And in Townsville, people take their Christmas lights seriously. 

In the spirit of the season, one disgruntled resident has added this sign to his decor. “I’m not sure how the choice profanity will go down with hundreds of cars full of children passing by every night,” she writes.  (Please note that our submitter has pre-censored the profanity from the photo, in deference to our readers’ delicate sensibilities.)

Meanwhile, in Michigan, I think this local news headline says it all:
Beheaded Mickey Mouse Christmas decoration leaves Davison resident upset, children scared

Well, in any case, it says considerably more than the accompanying photo of this terrifying scene:

My favorite quote from the article:

“She was able to sew Mickey back together and use some Gorilla tape to patch up the gingerbread man, but some of her children’s innocence has been lost.”

related: Decor-nappings of Christmases past

extra credit: “Queenslander risks death for killer Christmas light display”  [abc news brisbane]

Cheeky, eh?

related: Don’t be an ash-hole

Due to some recent stressful events, Daniel in Brisbane recently started smoking cigarettes again after 10 years of going without. “To avoid embarassing questions from people I know, I take steps to avoid smelling like cigarette smoke,” he says — including leaving work and parking next to a rail line, on the opposite side of any residential buildings. (Admittedly, a wee bit shady.)

Well, somebody noticed. Daniel found this note on his windshield.

related:  Blowing smoke

William in Sydney spotted this note on the notice board of an apartment block he was visiting. If you’re going to tackle a DIY project, I reckon that Saturday morning is as good a time as any, no?

Confidential to the notewriter: As someone who also a) lives in an apartment complex and b) works the night shift at a hospital, I’m surprised you haven’t figured out by now that the world doesn’t revolve around you and your schedule. The graveyard shift is already taking years off your life. How about you do everyone a favor and use some of that sweet shift differential to buy yourself a pair of earplugs?

related: Hello, 911? My neighbors are loud walkers!

Alexandria in Australia says that the card she got from her parents on her 18th birthday (below) “is a pretty good summary of my formative years.”

Dear Alexandra,

I think this card expresses the fact that, although we both love you very much we find it hard to say, just like you do. All the best for your adulthood.

Dad

With bells on! Love Mum

related: Really, Mom, you shouldn’t have.

Spotted by Elissa in Annandale, Australia:

related: Free coat rack, gently used

Writes our submitter in Australia: “Our office has been quite settled for the past few years without any issues, but recently fridge items have started to go missing. I’ve lost my own odd pieces of lunch to our unknown thief, so I sympathise completely.”

related: Dear ‘Desperate for Salad’