Entries Tagged as 'bathroom'

Maybe you should switch to body wash?

March 31st, 2008 · 89 Comments

At least that would make the roommate situation a little less hairy

STOP USING MY BAR OF SOAP IN THE SHOWER!

related: Losing Lisa

Tags: grow up · hair · hygiene · roommates · San Diego · shower · that's disgusting

If you needed an excuse to skip the gym today…

March 28th, 2008 · 99 Comments

Well, our anonymous contributor in Pompano Beach, Florida has one for you.

He explains: “I keep a gym membership so that I can feel good about my financial commitment to my health — not so much for the actual health benefits per se. I hadn’t been to the gym in at least two months when I came across this note posted by the showers. (My shower at home was being worked on.) I’m glad I make it a habit to wear sandals in the shower during my quarterly visits.”

ATTENTION   Please refrain from defecating in the shower areas. It is unsanitary and hazardous to the health and well being of our members and staff. Thank you!

related: The Mad Bomber

Tags: actually totally reasonable · Florida · gym · shit · shower · that's disgusting · that's unsanitary

I’m pregnant…what’s your excuse?

March 23rd, 2008 · 100 Comments

Amanda in Fairhaven, Mass. recently took her sister-in-law in for an ultrasound appointment, and was a little frightened by this sign. (It was posted in three places, both inside and outside the restroom.)

IF YOU ARE HAVING AN ULTRASOUND PLEASE DO NOT EMPTY YOUR BLADDER THIS MEANS YOU!!!

related: Bun — er, pizza in the oven

Tags: bathroom · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Massachusetts · piss · preggers

Clarifying motion #2

March 12th, 2008 · 110 Comments

After a minor breakout, Matt in Toronto “borrowed” his roommate’s Clinique cleanser…and then forgot to put it back where he found it. His (admirably direct) roommate asked if he’d mind not using her Clinique products again in the future, seeing as it was, you know, pretty expensive and not that big of a container. “No problem,” Matt said. Crisis averted!

That is, until last week, when Matt ran out of his own face wash. Instead, he used his roommate’s (again) and then forgot to put it back where he found it (again). The next day, when Matt went to use her cleanser again (after forgetting to stop at the store to buy his own) he found this little Clinique bonus.

I'm sorry Matt, I can't afford for both of us to use my face products. Thx.

Matt’s mea culpa, such as it is: “I shouldn’t have been using her products in the first place, especially after she asked me the first time. I’ll just make sure I never run out of anything ever again!”

related: Is nothing sacred?

Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · actually totally reasonable · bathroom · hygiene · roommates · thx · Toronto

When you can’t blame the dog

March 6th, 2008 · 127 Comments

Spotted by Maureen in Cincinnati, Ohio…

Please excuse the odor in the ladies room. It is being caused by the City of Dayton. We are currently taking action against the City to correct this problem.

(Actually, just kidding — it’s from a conference center in Dayton. But how great would that be?)

related: Blame it on Coke

Tags: bathroom · Dayton · odor · Ohio

But Charlie, don’t forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he always wanted

February 24th, 2008 · 109 Comments

Charlie in Hopkinton, Massachusetts (age 17) and his little brother (age 15) spent a good deal of time scheming about how to respond to their mother’s notes around the bathroom before deciding upon shaving cream as their weapon of choice.

p.s. Matilda: the most passive-aggressive child in fiction? (Also, Muggle-wump: the most passive-aggressive monkey?) discuss!

related: Living with an adolescent (abridged)

Tags: bathroom · Massachusetts · Moms & Dads

It always comes down to the toilet paper.

January 16th, 2008 · 69 Comments

Our anonymous submitter received this note after playing host to his friend’s band. In his defense, he says, “the house was not messy.” and, besides, “I never leave him notes when I do normal household chores like emptying the dishwasher and taking the trash out.”

I cleaned the kitchen, emptied the dishwasher, and took out the trash. I would appreciate if you clean my with bathroom which got purely abused by your friends.

Adds our submitter: “Oh, and he can’t count — it was seven guys.” (Quite a Michelle-esque touch, no?)

related: Martyr complex much?

Tags: band · bathroom · paper product fairy · roommates · that's disgusting · toilet paper

Or possilly, that no body ‘b’ there

January 12th, 2008 · 74 Comments

Mishee was about to go ahead and just pay for that Snapple…until she saw this colorful little note at a drugstore in Sunnyvale, California. Phew!

attn.JPG

UPDATE: Mishee (ever the overachiever) has returned to the scene to satisfy your curiosity about the signs behind the signs…and finds her Snapple-drinking plans foiled in the process!

Photobucket

related: If it weren’t for the toilet, there would be no books

Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · California · sad face · Silicon Valley · spelling and grammar police · unnecessary "quotation marks"

The Holy See of the W.C.

January 6th, 2008 · 94 Comments

Octavio in Munich says that his landlord (who shares the same apartment) is a regular high priest of paternalistic little — the entire flat is covered with them. On the bathroom wall, for example, this glorious collage is what stares back at those seated on the throne. (Altogether now: “holy shiße!”)

going OUT?... must turn the light OFFFF!!!  so, then... byeeeee!...  please!!! use the toilet brush!!!
going OUT?…
must turn the light OFFFF!!!

so, then…
byeeeee!…

please!!!
use the toilet brush!!!

.

Tags: bathroom · Deutsche · landlords and property managers · lighting · Munich · toilet · turning on/off

Is nothing sacred?

January 5th, 2008 · 139 Comments

Poor Chase.

This was my brand new toorthbrush, given to me, special by the dentist because I brush my gums toohard. It has softer bristles than you can buy in the sotre. Thanks a lot "whoever!" Enjoy the toothbrush! I told you writing my name wouldn't change anything!

related: WoW, indeed

Tags: bathroom · CAPS LOCK · hygiene · New Jersey · roommates · thanks (but not really)