Entries Tagged as 'birthday'

Six-year-olds make the best birthday cards

April 24th, 2013 · 23 Comments

Brad in Nebraska says this birthday card from his six-year-old niece, Dani, stopped the whole family in its tracks. (With its awesomeness, I assume!) Mckenna, you are one lucky lady.

I love you when you are scared and also sweet I love you if you can't chew corn and I love you when you hate mama's meat Happy Birthday Mckenna

Happy “WTF?” Wednesday, everyone!

related: Mom likes Dad’s meat

Tags: birthday · kids · not so much passive-aggressive

No drama!!!

December 4th, 2012 · 48 Comments

Yes, Lorraine, admits, she works long hours at her job. And no, her mother hasn’t been over to her house in a while…but neither has anybody else. Nice of her Mum to refrain from DRAMA[!!!] about it though, right? (Krystle Gale, I’m guessing you can relate.)

Have a Great Day! On your Birthday! Had to send it at work! I have been SO MANY TIMES in your place, I DONT KNOW THE RIGHT NUMBER. No Drama!!!

related: So, Mom, what you’re telling me is to cover up with a latex catsuit?

Tags: Australia · birthday · exclamation-point happy!!!! · guilt trip · Moms & Dads · Mother-daughter notes

Better late than never?

November 29th, 2012 · 51 Comments

At first glance, I thought this was one of those ads in the back of a high school yearbook, but no — Katie in Galveston, Texas actually spotted this in the  pages of the local newspaper.

Happy Birthday Krystal Gale. 35 years old today. My special daughter, makes me so glad to have you in my life. But I wish you would call or text more to me. Your Mom, So many thoughts about you and me together, My Shadow. Better Late than never.

related: My parents, the loan sharks

Happy Valentine’s Day to my son…and the harlot with whom he’s living in sin

extra credit: “Woman Has Bizarre Ability To Share Details About Personal Life With Parents” [theonion.com]

Tags: birthday · guilt trip · Moms & Dads · Mother-daughter notes · newspaper · public shaming

Well, that’s a bit rude.

September 30th, 2012 · 67 Comments

Emily in Texas remembers her parents being convinced she was most uncouth child ever born — they even sent her to etiquette school to clean up her act. Well, she got a rude reminder of those days when she found this birthday card in the back of her closet.

Dear Daughter, We wish you [a] very Happy 7th Birthday and hope you will make us proud of you by doing everything better [particularly] on your [manners]. from Mom & Dad

related: Happy Valentine’s Day from Mom

Tags: birthday · etiquette · Moms & Dads · spelling and grammar police · Texas

A belated birthday/thank you card

May 2nd, 2012 · 104 Comments

Ashley in Sheffield received this lovely belated birthday card from a neighbo(u)r.

(Nicely done, Laura.)

Dear Ashley, Happy Birthday. Hope you had a great evening. Thanks very much for keeping me awake by you and your friends screaming and shouting in the street. Enjoy your day of sleeping it off. I have to go to work and function on no sleep. Thanks again, Laura.

related: If you were the one who was so drunk or so stupid…

Tags: birthday · most popular notes of 2012 · neighbors · noise · sleeping · thanks (but not really) · U.K.

Another year older, but not necessarily wiser

March 30th, 2012 · 83 Comments

“When I saw the first post on Facebook, I thought it was a rather aggressive joke,” our submitter says. “Then I saw her response two days later, when only 45 people (yes, I counted) wished her a happy birthday on her wall.” What a tough world we live in! (sob)

Tuesday: "It's my birthday tomorrow I am expect a Facebook post from everyone. Thanks" Thursday: "Thanks to everyone who posted on my facebook wall for my birthday. I am disappointed in those of you who saw it was my birthday and did not post wishing me will, but I guess that that is the world we live in and I am coming to accept that in my 22 years of age. Thank you"

related: Facebook, a place for narcissists

Tags: birthday · Facebook · kids today · most popular notes of 2012

Daddy dearest

January 19th, 2012 · 25 Comments

Writes Virginia in Sumner, Washington: “Going through a box of old photographs in the attic, I found this birthday card I gave my father when I was five or six. I was a terrible child.”

You should spend more time with me but I love you anyway. Happy Birthday Dad

related: Some daughterly wisdom for Dad

Tags: birthday · Father-daughter notes · guilt trip · heart · kids · signed with love · xoxo

Eat it; love it. Got it?

December 6th, 2011 · 45 Comments

According to our submitter, Jason and his cake-baking wife are newlyweds. So…I guess the honeymoon’s over?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON. Even if you did nothing for mine, I still do love you.

related: “I don’t need a birthday cake,” I said.

extra credit: Bruce Bogtrotter’s chocolate cake

Tags: birthday · cake · guilt trip · love & marriage

Congratulations! At some point in time, through no effort of your own, you were born.

November 2nd, 2011 · 127 Comments

So, imma let you in on a little secret: nobody has any reason to give a shit about your birthday. If you’re over the age of, say, 12, and still expect people to fete your very existence every year, you should also expect to be disappointed. (Yes, I’m the Grinch of birthdays. And don’t even get me started on “birthday weeks.”)

That said, in this case our submitter actually did call her mother on the day of her birth. When Mom didn’t pick up, quick-thinking daughter left her a message. After that, our submitter says, her mother didn’t return her calls for several days — until phoning to say, “Check your e-mail.” While still on the line, our submitter did just that — and found this lovely e-card.

Thanks...a whole bunch! Thank You so much for the birthd.... Oh, wait a minute..... you didn't acknowledge my birthday... Mom

related: It’s my pity party and I’ll whine if I want to

extra credit: Half birthdays are the new black [stfuparents]

Tags: birthday · ellipses-crazed · Mother-daughter notes · thanks (but not really)

More proof that Facebook is turning us all into narcissists

October 23rd, 2011 · 67 Comments

Writes our submitter: “Last year Zaky changed the date of his birthday on Facebook just to test if anyone actually knew his real birthday. Nobody did, probably because he pulls crappy mind games like this. He did it again this year and it still didn’t work.”

I think Melissa (below) probably said it best: “Whatever, Zaky, as if anyone actually cares when your birthday is?”

Whatever, Zaky, as if anyone actually cares when your birthday is?

related: It’s my pity party and I’ll whine if I want to

Tags: Australia · birthday · Facebook