Entries Tagged as 'bodily fluids'

I can’t stand this shit anymore.

July 25th, 2007 · 50 Comments

Semarr prefaces this submission by saying: “I realize it’s not particularly *passive* aggressive, but in context it became so.” She explains:

There were eight people living in the house. One of them collected shelter cats and kept them in the basement. I found this note when I had come home from work very late at night. By morning, the board was blank and Jon L-W denied it ever existed, and all roommates at the next ‘house meeting’ refused to admit there were any aggressive undertones in house. Jon said he loved the cats. Other earlier voiced-behind-backs complaints were whole-heartedly denied.

My Disclaimer: This house smells like shit. I ate my dinner in shit tonight. The cats must GO or be in the basement permanently or, sad to say, I have to go, because I can't stand this shit anymore. Seriously, Jon L-W P.S. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT

Adds Semarr: “I moved out a month later.”

related: My cat-shit crazy neighbor

Tags: cats · excessive underlining · more aggressive than passive · New Jersey · not-so-veiled threats · odor · roommates · shit · that's disgusting · whiteboard

Martyr complex much?

July 19th, 2007 · 79 Comments

Sometimes, a little complaining is necessary.

I don't complain

(Submitted by Jeremiah in Little Rock, Arkansas.)

 

Tags: Arkansas · cleaning · dishes · dogs · martyr complex · money · roommates · shit

Do the rest of us a favor

June 19th, 2007 · 88 Comments

Looks like both the Mad Bomber and Richard G. Sells have West-coast counterparts:

favor.jpg

Grossed out? Yeah, me too. Blame Gregory in Los Angeles for documenting this one (!!!)

related: The Mad Bomber, Act 1: “Sorry about the language”

Tags: CAPS LOCK · die bitch die · ellipses-crazed · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · group bitchfest · Los Angeles · more aggressive than passive · office · piss · shit · that's disgusting · toilet

The Mad Bomber, Act 2: Please stay seated during the entire performance

May 23rd, 2007 · 34 Comments

If you missed it, Act 1 is where this saga begins. Here, we see Richard G. Sell’s frustration grow to a fever pitch…

WE ARE TIRED OF THIS!!!!!! Let it be known by all of our female members that the staff of the Lawrence Athletic Club are tired of cleaning up after the MAD BOMBER.

And it continues with Act 3

Tags: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gym · not-so-veiled threats · shit · toilet

The Mad Bomber, Act 1: “Sorry about the language”

May 22nd, 2007 · 36 Comments

I don’t want to oversell this, but the following series of three signs (sent in by a health-club patron who wishes to remain nameless) just became my new all-time favorite. I love so many things about Richard G. Sells’s first masterpiece (below) that I don’t even know where to begin.

Twice someone has crapped all over the wall, back of the toilet, under the toilet, on the seat, under the seat, and on the floor without getting any of the crap in the toilet stool [sic] itself.

The best part, I think, might be the Freudian slip mid-way through (“…without getting any of the crap in the toilet stool itself.”)

But it doesn’t end there! Read acts 2 and 3.

Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gym · most popular notes of 2007 · not-so-veiled threats · p.s. · shit

Some legionnaire’s idea of epigrammatic wit

May 21st, 2007 · 10 Comments

I realize this example (from outside the American Legion HQ in Park Slope, Brooklyn) is not so much “passive-aggressive” as it is “crazy,” but it tickles me too much not to post. The little species/feces couplet has been painted over and re-written at least twice, so obviously I’m not the only one who appreciated it.

CONDEMNED NO LITTERING. Dump no garbage here. Join the human species - don't dump - even feces!

DO NOT LITTER. PERIOD. END OF STORY.

You can’t tell from these photos, but this little storefront stands as one of the few bastions on Fifth Avenue that the armies of invading gentrifiers couldn’t take down with their industrial-size nozzles of mrs. meyer’s and turn into a precious little bakery selling organic dog cupcakes. While I was taking these photos a man in a lawn chair was either yelling at me to stop or trying to sell me a ratty old suitcase.

Tags: Brooklyn · crazypants · exclamation-point happy!!!! · garbage · more aggressive than passive · Park Slope · shit

That shit is disrespectful.

May 20th, 2007 · 51 Comments

Mike gets the last word in this exchange.

WTF Mike, I just sat in some piss on the seat. Clean up after yourself! That shit is disrespectful. -KreggOh please. Last I used the toilet I was sitting, reading a book. Am I to hear I have magical flying piss now? Let's not even get me started on cleanliness issues, shall we? And honestly, stop it w/ the passive-aggressive notes and walk-by accusations. "that shit is disrespectful" -Mike

Tags: bathroom · Baton Rouge · meta · piss · roommates · that's disrespectful · toilet

Now you’re just bringing it on yourself, don’t you think?

May 20th, 2007 · 8 Comments

The latest in a well-documented series.

Things to do this summer: 1. Watch baseball 2. Enjoy Prospect Park 3. Swim in the Ocean. Things NOT to do this summer: 1. Do not let your dog shit here 2. Do not leave your trash/unwanted items here 3. Do not tag my door - please :)

related: Have a nice day

 

Tags: Brooklyn · dogs · garbage · neighbors · Park Slope · shit · smiley

What is it about dog shit that pushes Brooklynites over the edge?

May 18th, 2007 · 25 Comments

Wesh snapped this a few years back in Red Hook, Brooklyn, while walking from his brother’s rehearsal dinner to the after-party bar.

Says Wesh: “What gets me are the flags. Why flags?”

CLEAN UP AFTER YOUR DOGS MOTHERFUCKERS KICK YOUR ASS

(How bougie does Park Slope’s version look in comparison?)

Tags: Brooklyn · dogs · more aggressive than passive · shit

Have a nice day

May 13th, 2007 · 6 Comments

The latest in a series previously documented here and here…right across the street from my Park Slope apartment.

Have a nice day. Please don't let your dog shit here and please don't TAG on my door! Thanks :)

Update: Another one!

related: The Pooper Stooper

Tags: dogs · neighbors · Park Slope · shit · smiley