Darin in Chicago came across the note on the side of his neighbor’s garage just as he was throwing his own dog’s crap in the trash can. (This is kinda like getting out the new roll of TP, but then leaving it on the side of the sink to get wet instead of just putting it on the dispenser…except, worse.)

I don’t really understand the logic here either, but perhaps this particular dog owner is still dealing with the scars from dealing with neighbors like this one, from Ottawa:

related: This is not a trash can

We’ve already seen people throwing urine in bottles out of their window…and now, shit in bags? Who does that?!

(Apparently, at least one dog owner in Bailey’s NYC apartment building.)

related: Throwing cat hair out the window = almost as bad

If I worked at Steve‘s office, I would definitely be rallying the troops to launch a (non) silent 90° protest of round-the-clock water-glass-filling…and then place “out of order” signs on all the restrooms. (It would be lame, but not as lame as this sign.)

This is not a thing, people! I refuse to acknowledge this is a thing!

related: Is this a thing now?

From a convenience store in Florida:

A petting zoo in Virginia:

And a U.S. Army post in Washington State:

(Thanks to Nicolette, Gaby, and Kharissa for submitting!)

related: Is this a thing now?

Well, besides that whole skin cancer thing, there’s the fact that tanning booths — like  thrift-store fitting rooms — seem to bring out the animal in everyone. And that’s probably not the kind of “golden glow” you were aiming for, right?

Exhibit A) From Margo in Indiana:

Exhibit B) From Lisa in Ohio, an ominous threat indeed:

Exhibit C) From Emily in England:

Exhibit D) From Ann in Arkansas:

And Exhibit E) From an anonymous fake-baker in Louisiana:

related: When nature calls

extra credit: GTK is the new GTL

This bulletin board display from Louisville, Kentucky comes to us via Annie in Colorado, who adds: “I can’t help but feel sorry for the poor dogs caught popping a squat!” (Don’t worry, Annie. As you can see, I’ve taken steps to protect the identities of the canines pictured.)

Maybe it’s the classic crazypants handwriting, but I when I try to envision the creator of this display, the first image that comes to mind is one of those cop-show scenes where they bust in and find a room obsessively wallpapered with photos and maps and newspaper clippings documenting some big (or in this case, not so big) conspiracy theory.

But who knows? Maybe this guy is starting a new fetish mag and just wants to track down these dogs to pay their modeling fees or…something.

related: Dr. Freud’s Salon Scatologica

Writes our disgusted submitter: “All that time on the toilet to think, and this is what you came up with?”
______________

related: Does your roommate have note-writing diarrhea?

Moira and some friends recently rented a flat in Rome for a few days — lucky her, right? The only hitch to the plan was the fact their apartment was located on the very top floor, and while Rome might be the “The Eternal City,” spending eternity in a European-style elevator car wasn’t exactly the experience they were seeking.

Meanwhile, if you thought you weren’t afraid of elevators, a visit to the Hampton Inn in Burbank, California might change your mind. This placard inside the elevator (as documented by Kristen from Ohio), has got to be the least-reassuring attempt at preventing alarm I’ve ever seen. The fact that it manages to accomplish the exact opposite of its implied purpose makes me think the person behind it must be some kind of sadistic savant…and that he’s DEFINITELY watching you on the CCTV.

Not the anxious type? Well, how do you feel about dog shit and zombies? So far Kareen in Winnipeg has escaped this particular elevator unharmed, but that doesn’t mean she’s not watching where she steps.

related: Elevator nose grease

extra credit: “The Subway’s Elevator Operators, a Reassuring Amenity of Another Era” [nytimes.com]

extra extra credit: Time lapse video of a man stuck in an elevator for 41 hours [newyorker.com]

Need to borrow a cup of sugar? How about five pounds of dog poop? Well heck, that’s what neighbors are for!

related: Do you want a doggy bag for those leftovers, sir?

extra credit: The perfect leash for dog haters/sociopaths

Sorry, I meant back door. I’m gonna slowly back away now, ma’am…

related: Dear lovely ladies