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Entries Tagged as 'Canada'

My Dad weighs 15 pounds, does not have a job, and likes to wear shirts.

June 26th, 2012 · 87 Comments

Jill’s seven-year-old son “made” this for his Dad at school. “We’d like to think the near-complete lack of effort reflects a lack of enthusiasm for school assignments and is not a sign of a profound rift in his relationship with his father,” she says.

“And for the record, my husband is not 20 years old, weights more than 15 pounds and is taller than 2’1″. And he has a job, as a writer. (Which, to be fair, can sure look a lot like “unemployed” sometimes.)

My Dad's Favorites Food: I don't know Dessert: No idea Game to play: ? Sport to watch: hockey on TV Restaurant: Does not have one My favorite memory with my dad is: I don't have one. My dad is the best in the family at: NO ANSWER. At his job, my dad: He does not have a job.  When not at work, my dad likes to: ? My dad is: 20 years old. My dad is: 2 ft 1 in tall. My dad weighs 15 pounds. My dad has gray hair. My dad has black eyes. My dad likes to wear shirts. My dad is special to me because...He is special to me but I don't have a reason.

P.S. The bit at the bottom says: “He is special to me but I don’t have a reason.”

related: “Drunk Mommy”

Tags: Canada · Father-son notes · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2012 · schools & teachers

Lactose Intolerance

May 25th, 2012 · 51 Comments

Writes Steph in Toronto: “Most of the notices posted in the elevator of my condo building are pretty standard (fire alarm drills, etc.) but this one’s special. It just raises so many questions: Was the milk expired? Were they throwing it at someone? How much milk are we talking about that it’s a ‘matter of public safety’? I need to know!”

We have received reports of a resident throwing MILK off their balcony on the southeast side of the building. This is disgusting, unsanitary, and extremely messy for the residents below you. Do not ever throw or drop anything off your balcony – this is a matter of public safety as well as cleanliness, and legal charges will be pursued against any resident caught doing this at any time. We expect all residents to treat this building with courtesy and respect. Remember – this is your home too.

related: Urine in bottles thrown out windows is disgusting

Tags: milk · that's unsanitary · Toronto · WTF?

But it was so cute when the baby panda did it!

March 21st, 2012 · 37 Comments

One of the employees at Rebecca’s workplace in Toronto is unfortunately prone to surprise sneezing fits…much to the chagrin of a certain co-worker. After one too many gesundheits, this coworker apparently decided to go public with her message, posting this note where the sneezer  — god bless her — would be sure to see it.


extra credit:

related: You’re not wrong, Walter…

Tags: CAPS LOCK · heartwarming compassion · hygiene · office · Toronto

My neighbors are always sticking their butts where they don’t belong

March 20th, 2012 · 122 Comments

Heather in Toronto lives in a large -rise apartment, so she says it’s difficult to determine the identity of the ash-holes who are tossing their cigarette butts off their balconies with no apparent concern for either the earth or the people living down below. Heather says this photo doesn’t even show the full extent of the problem — there are many, many more butts around — so “feel free to suggest a new short message!”


related: Cat hair? Chuck it out the window!

Tags: most popular notes of 2012 · neighbors · smoking · Toronto

Happy Valentine’s Day!

February 14th, 2012 · 52 Comments

xoxo, PAN

Happy Valentine's Day! Your morning sex woke me up. Keep it down, or I will continue to let all your neighbors know you're a groaner in bed. With love, your neighbour

related: Valentine’s Day break-up heartbreak

Tags: Calgary · heart · neighbors · sex sex sex · signed with love · Valentine's Day · xoxo

Meet the World’s Crankiest Roommate

February 9th, 2012 · 231 Comments

If the 21 notes you’ve already posted around the house haven’t made a difference…do you really think the 22nd is going to be the one that finally clicks? Just a thought!

The party stops as soon as you walk in

No one wants to walk in a pool when we're not in a pool

We're not trying to create a big foot

This isn't a closet

We don't want trash in our house

We don't house people who come from the bar

related: The Post-It Wars

Tags: blitzkrieg approach · cleaning · dishes · money · most popular notes of 2012 · noise · Ontario · roommates · smoking

Hey, I was saving that for later!

January 22nd, 2012 · 17 Comments

…because if you are saving the contents of your nose for an afternoon snack, feel free to use to office walls for that purpose!

Are you saving these for an afternoon snack? If not, please use a tissue.

related: The bathroom-stall booger epidemic

Tags: Canada · hygiene · nose-picking · office

Mad Santa

December 23rd, 2011 · 27 Comments

Writes Mimi in Toronto: “Me being 17 and my brother being 19, we weren’t particularly interested in doing the whole ‘leave Santa provisions’ charade on Christmas Eve. Our mother took offense to our lack of Christmas spirit, and we awoke the next morning to this note, along with some half eaten cookies and carrots.”

Dear Mimi and Ben, What the fuck?! No cookies, drink and carrots for Santa and his reindeer?! What kind of hospitality is that?! Sheesh. Love, Santa P.S. I helped myself thankyouverymuch

related: All I want for Christmas

Tags: Christmas · family · Toronto

Who says Canadians are nice?

December 21st, 2011 · 86 Comments

And here you thought your neighbors were assholes for dumping your dry laundry on a table.

To: The person who stopped the washer in the middle of my wash cycle and took my clothes out just to wash yours... Yeah, You're an asshole. Unfortunately for you, so am I. You can find your wet clothes frozen outside in the snow. Any problems? Come see me in 301.

Kita in Alberta particularly enjoyed the fact that this note — written on the back of a piece of wrapping paper — was stuck to the wall with a smiley-face Band-Aid.

related: Dear nice person who stole my laundry…

extra credit: “How nice are we?” []

Tags: Canada · laundry · most popular notes of 2011 · oh snap

Wanted: Part-time Masochists

October 18th, 2011 · 65 Comments

At least with this job, you know exactly what kind of misery you’re signing up for if you decide to “enquire within.” (If only all bosses let their true characters shine through so obviously at this stage of the game.)

WANTED: Part-time sales person who won't quit after 2 months, who works hard and doesn't think she's doing me a favour by working here, who can take a joke and won't cry everyday [sic] on the floor.

related: My sadistic dungeon-master won’t let me call in sick

Tags: Canada · casual sexism · crazy boss · help wanted · now that's management