Entries Tagged as 'clip art catastrophe'
What do you do when words alone can’t express the depth of your feeling? In the business world, you turn to clip art. And specifically, you turn to screen beans.
If you’ve seen a PowerPoint presentation in the last decade, you’re most likely familiar with screen beans, the clip art collection that will not die.
Says one fan: “Sreen beans are GREAT! they have personality! You have to have imagination and a sense of humor to appreciate them.” You do not, however, have to be an English speaker.
Our anonymous submitter from Norway found this sign in a dirty corner of a factory where he’s been working this summer.
(Loose translation from the Norwegian: IF YOU FEEL THE URGE TO PEE, USE A TOILET. THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT PLACE.)
“The really funny thing about it,” our submitter says, “is that someone has peed (several times) on the actual sign!”
related: Stop! in the name of clip art
extra credit: Absolute PowerPoint [thenewyorker.com]
Powerpoint is evil [wired.com]
Tags: CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · Norway · piss
What kind of objectionable trash do you suppose is being disposed of in these bins? (Half-eaten curries? Yesterday’s Times?) How many hours of company time did the sign’s designer spend on this full-color laminated masterpiece? What is that comma doing there? and how, exactly, how are these bins to be monitored?
related: Servicing over a half-billion people…each and every day
Tags: bathroom · big brother-ish · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · garbage · Ireland · now that's management · office
Dealing with the rantings of your crazy boss or overzealous receptionist is one thing, but what do you do when your office’s resident passive-aggressive note-leaver doesn’t even work there? Casey in San Diego (a.k.a. RunBarbara) says that’s the situation she’s found herself in at her job.
The offender, Sandra, “has met me a total of twice, both times for less than a minute,” Casey says. Yet for some reason, when Sandra (the aunt of the owner) stops by the office once a week to water the plants and drop off supplies, “she leaves these strange notes EVERYWHERE — and she almost always directs questions about said notes to me,” Casey says. “I often have no idea she posts these notes until someone asks me about the odd directions in them.”
Below, a small sampling of Sandra’s delightfully bizarrre directives. (Just click on the photos to enlarge.)
I’d like to think this note was posted immediately following the “potluck”…
related: The return of Thx Sandra!
Tags: bathroom · battle of the sexes · blitzkrieg approach · California · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · crazypants · dubious scientific claims · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gloriously redundant · most popular notes of 2008 · office cop · party planning committee · San Diego · spelling and grammar police · thx · toilet · unnecessary "quotation marks" · vomit · You call that punctuation?
Which clip art catastrophe raises the most new and troubling questions in your mind?
Is it exhibit a, from New York’s West Village?
(Think about the designer’s thought process here for a moment. Why the sunglasses? And not just any shades…but electric blue? Ditto, the sunflower.)
Exhibit b, From a casino in Cambodia?
(Does no crossed out mean…yes?)
Or exhibit c, from a pharmacy in Berlin?
(Trust me: speaking German is no help here.)
If you can’t decide, remember that your first instinct is usually the best choice (um, except when it’s not).
related: clip art crimes
Tags: Berlin · Cambodia · clip art catastrophe · Deutsche · dogs · New York · you be the judge
I really thought it couldn’t get more egregious than this clip-art catastrophe from a church in Boston (left), which made this one (right) look downright tasteful in comparison.
But then, at a friend’s recent wedding, Carey in Northern Virginia spotted this note — complete with that same punchy little yellow smiley — on several doors of the church. (There are more than one, I suppose, so that when you do a double-take and ask yourself “Wait…did they really just go there?” you can rest assured that yes, they really did.)
The kicker? Before the service started, Carey says, “We spotted the priest up near the altar — chatting on his Razr.”
Meanwhile in guatemala, Boingboing‘s Xeni Jardin spotted a sign one might consider either more or less blasphemous depending on whether you’re a follower of Christ or of the principles of good design
(translation: “TO TALK WITH GOD/YOU DON’T NEED A CELLPHONE/TURN IT OFF PLEASE”)
And if you’re of a faith that prefers to talk directly to God’s intermediaries, you might prefer the approach of this Guatemalan church also documented by Xeni:
“Talk to me personally,
I [will] listen to you.
You do not need a cellphone.
related: Stop! In the name of clip art
extra credit: Crummy church signs
Tags: cell phone · clip art catastrophe · Espanol · Guatemala · guilt trip · Jesus · most popular notes of 2008 · Northern Virginia · Virginia · you're like so going to hell
Like this phrase, there are a few irritating little pieces of clip art that keep popping up in submissions over and over again. Hovering somewhere near the top of most-wanted list is this pouty little white-gloved dandy.
From the factories of Pittsburgh…
…to the cube-farms of Virginia, this perspiring misanthrope has been spreading his message of intolerance with impunity.
But, once again, it’s a note from a church bathroom (this one spotted by Jess in Boston) that really pushes things to a whole new level of divine didacticism.
Can I get a witness?!
related: clip art crimes
Tags: bathroom · Boston · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · exclamation-point happy!!!! · gloriously redundant · most popular notes of 2008 · neighbors · office fridge · Pittsburgh
Faydra in Gainesville, Florida lives in an apartment complex she describes as “a step above dorm living” — 85 females total, all of them coming and going at all hours. Faydra’s next-door neighbors kicked things off (with the most frightening clip art extravaganza ever) and things devolved from there. In chronological order:
related: A fancy feast
Tags: CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Florida · neighbors · noise · rebuttals · smiley
This oh-so-subtle note was posted by Mary’s former boss, “a pathetic professor in a backwater institution” where 90% of the graduate students happened to be Korean, Japanese, or Chinese.
“Nevermind that he doused himself with great lashings of Brut in an attempt to jazz up the bald-up-top-ponytail-in-back look he had going on,” Mary says. “There were a lot of things I could have said to him on a post-it, but I decided to be the big kid and quit.” Luckily for us, she swiped this note off the breakroom microwave first.
Interestingly, it seems fish-hating office workers elsewhere also share an affinity for clip art.
related: No smelly foods
Tags: a little insensitive · a matter of taste · clip art catastrophe · college life · excessive capitalization · fish · microwave · odor · office · spelling and grammar police
Many offices, it seems, are a regular Disneyland of what only appear to be inanimate objects. The evidence?
From Frank in San Francisco, a sentient sponge:
From Amy in Annapolis, Maryland, a talking toilet:
From Ben in San Antonio, Texas, a talking door:
And then there’s my favorite – from an anonymous submitter in Washington, D.C. – a talking (and walking) microwave:
(Most baffling…where on earth did that clip art come from?)
related: I guess that’s why
Tags: Annapolis · CAPS LOCK · cleaning · clip art catastrophe · confusion??? · D.C. · irregular capitalization · Maryland · microwave · opening/closing · San Antonio · San Francisco · Texas · toilet
Which clip art extravaganza is the most gratuitous? You be the judge!
Is it this sign, from the Virginia office of — of course — a major mobile carrier?
Is it this little tea party of a sign from Cambridge, Mass.?
Or is it this one, from, yes, a church restroom?
related: Cubicle etiquette
Tags: all clogged up · bathroom · Boston · cell phone · clip art catastrophe · Jesus · Massachusetts · office · tea · Virginia · you be the judge · you're like so going to hell