There’s the typical New York City note…

And then there’s the Willamette Valley way…

related: Completely valid rebuttals

No matter the hemisphere, Comic Sans gets no love. (This note, however, seems to have inspired a Brazilian copycat.)

Rodolfo’s rough translation from the Portuguese:

Please keep this door closed. Management.

Please don’t use Comic Sans if you’re serious.

related: The original “please don’t use Comic Sans”

Reports Barb in Las Vegas: “A woman in our office, originally from the Philippines, just got her citizenship. Our often inappropriate receptionist wrote this note on her card.”

Yes, that really does say “no more climbing over barbed wire in the nite.” Adds Barb: “She also printed lyrics from West Side Story in giant font and hung them in the area where we had celebratory cake. So odd!”

related: America the not-so-beautiful

Taylor in Tulsa, Oklahoma works — well, worked — at the front desk of a hotel. “When I started this job,” he says, “we were told we could eat in the back office so that if it got too busy we could stop our lunch and help out, but apparently my offensive burrito was over the top.” Taylor swears the dirty dishes weren’t his, but he was laid off anyway — after which, he adds, “the note was promptly removed.”

(“Outback,” by the way, refers to the employee dining area, not the steakhouse known for its “delicious” bread.)

Meanwhile, at a small office in Canada, our submitter says one of the company’s directors has a similar habit of sending out a pedantic “just FYI”-type memo to the entire staff each time she has run-in with another co-worker. (And yes, our submitter says, they’re always in Comic Sans.)

related: Complimentary body spray for all employees!

Spelling & Grammar Nazis…not necessarily known for compassion and self-restraint. Sure, maybe there is “a time for every matter under heaven” — but maybe this isn’t wasn’t the best time to point out your superior knowledge of homophones?

(Thanks to Robin in Las Vegas for submitting.)

related: “Domestic violence isn’t cool but neither is keeping us all awake.”

If you’d like to join a vigilante punctuation posse or a grassroots typography militia, Washington State might be the place for you.

In one Seattle suburb, for example, an underground group has targeted a certain “JS,” who sources say “has some serious control/micromanagement issues, and enjoys flaunting his power to tell people what to do a liiiittle too much. He also tends to find nasty ways to get revenge on people who contradict him.”

Elsewhere in Seattle, “office professionalism” seems to have no bearing on freedom of speech…as long as you use the right typeface, of course.

related: Completely valid rebuttals