PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » blame it on the crackhead http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people Thu, 09 Feb 2012 21:06:57 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Oh, sure, blame it on the crackhead. http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/06/blame-it-on-the-crackhead/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/06/blame-it-on-the-crackhead/#comments Tue, 06 Sep 2011 19:30:54 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=19332 Take it from Whitney, kids: “Crack is whack.” (And it makes you an easy scapegoat for pretty much anything and everything.)

From Akron, Ohio:

The crackhead theives [sic] have been busy stealing our stuff, inside + out. Please report all crackhead sightings to SPD [phone number redacted]

From Toronto:

DEAR CRACKHEADS: Please don't steal the empty porn cases. They don't have much of a street value, and since crack/heroin renders you impotent anyways, we really don't see the logic in your decision making abilities. Big Kiss. 7/24 Staff

From New York City:

To the Crackhead who samshed in my windows

From Pueblo, Colorado:

Billboard

From Phoenix:

The fucking neighborhood Crack Head stole my broke down wore out mat bike what will the Dumb Ass Steal of yours next

From Seattle:

dear crackheads: please stop being crackheads. you thank

And lastly, from South London:

Squirrels on Crack

related: So if I start selling drugs I can drive an Escalade, too?

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/09/06/blame-it-on-the-crackhead/feed/ 56 At least in prison they get to play basketball in the courtyard http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/10/13/at-least-in-prison-they-get-to-play-basketball-in-the-courtyard/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/10/13/at-least-in-prison-they-get-to-play-basketball-in-the-courtyard/#comments Thu, 14 Oct 2010 02:23:26 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=16752 Unsurprisingly, Emily in D.C. says it took less than 24 hours for one her neighbors to call bullshit on the building management’s “exciting news.”

Exciting News!! The Courtyard is Now Open!!

Meanwhile, this building in Columbus, Ohio — which submitter Andrew says is “really nice and fancy-looking” — appears to take the mullet approach to policing its public spaces. (Business in the front, party in the back!)

Do not shit in doorway. Smoke your crack in rear lot. Thank you

Adds Andrew: “I 100% believe that this note is legit. I work exactly one block away from where the sign was posted, and a few days ago, I went outside only to find my self interrupting someone who was pissing on our dumpster. We have caught people in the act of shitting in our parking lot, and have also received many “anonymous fecal gifts.”

related: It’s fall! Here are a few updates and several complaints.

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/10/13/at-least-in-prison-they-get-to-play-basketball-in-the-courtyard/feed/ 57 The right to bear fruit http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/08/27/the-right-to-bear-fruit/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/08/27/the-right-to-bear-fruit/#comments Wed, 27 Aug 2008 22:14:04 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=9570 Three U.S. cities where nature-lovers might want to keep their hands to themselves:

1. Austin, Texas

To the people who keep digging up and stealing plants from this garden...The surrounding neighbors have been alerted and are keeping watch now. (Some are ex-Military are not afraid to chase after you or shout.) I'm serious!!! This is private property! You are trespassing and committing a crime. I'm not rich and I like my garden go get a second job if you want plants! I'm warning you!

2. Macon, Georgia

To the Fucktard who stole my watermellon [sic]: It was not even RIPE yet. But I'm sure you didn't notice when you were high on crack. Leave my fucking plants alone! —Proud owner of a .45 and a 38 special

3. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

The Mayor and The Police have been notified — WATCHING for any more Flower destruction and Theft

(Thanks to Don in Austin, Elizabeth in Macon, and Jasmine in Pittsburgh for risking the wrath of some devoted gardening/second amendment enthusiasts to document these warnings.)

related: No “questions” asked

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