Entries Tagged as 'Europe'

Mahvelous, just mahvelous

August 4th, 2008 · 274 Comments

Writes Michael in Milton Keynes, England: “I have an ex-service ambulance which I use as a van. I had parked it on the road round the corner from me for a couple of weeks, and after two days I got a call from the town council’s abandoned vehicle unit. Then I got a few calls from the police. Today, when I decided to move it, I found this note on the window. I was almost tempted to buy something and abandon it there for real now…but that would be bad, wouldn’t it?”

related: But He took the wheel

Tags: "polite notice" · parking · there goes the neighborhood · U.K.

A deep-seated issue

July 17th, 2008 · 620 Comments

Marcus in Leicester, U.K. found this stuck to the lid of the toilet by one of his housemates. “I’d understand if it was the seat,” he says, “but the lid?”

Marcus: It seems that you are unaware of the fact that is is considered a social norm to close the toilet lid after you have used it. I hope this information is helpful.

I’m with Marcus, here — I don’t think this is some kind of Dear Abby “does the toilet paper go over or under?” type issue. Is there anyone else who considers closing the toilet lid de rigueur?

related: dearest roommate

Tags: "helpful" advice · "up for debate" · etiquette · toilet · U.K.

So many questions

July 10th, 2008 · 185 Comments

What kind of objectionable trash do you suppose is being disposed of in these bins? (Half-eaten curries? Yesterday’s Times?) How many hours of company time did the sign’s designer spend on this full-color laminated masterpiece? What is that comma doing there? and how, exactly, how are these bins to be monitored?

No trash in feminine hygiene bins. The misuse of these bins will now be monitored, and reported to management.

related: Servicing over a half-billion people…each and every day

Tags: bathroom · big brother-ish · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · garbage · Ireland · now that's management · office

When dishwashers speak

July 2nd, 2008 · 147 Comments

I didn’t think i’d ever see a kitchen appliance more inappropriately anthropomorphized than this fridge, but I think this dishwasher note (from an anonymous submitter in England) dials the WTF-factor up to 11.

PLEASE FEED ME  I EAT DIRTY PLATES AND SHIT OUT CLEAN ONES   THEY ARE YUMMY  LOAD ME UP WITH DISHES, OR I CRY :(

related: The passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved

Tags: anthropomorphism · bold-underlined-caps · CAPS LOCK · dishes · dishwasher · mixed metaphors · sad face · shit · U.K. · WTF?

Wie bitte(r)?

June 19th, 2008 · 98 Comments

As our submitter Peter points out, the residents of Berlin — with their trademark Berliner schnauze — are not known for mincing words. But this sign, found at a coffee shop of sorts in the U-bahn station Kottbusser Tor, takes that characteristic Berliner directness one step further.

Peter’s rough translation: “Anyone who doesn’t buy anything PLEASE leave the store!!! Thanks.” (That’s at least one request we haven’t seen at a Starbucks…yet.)

WER NICHTS KAUFT VERLABT Bitte DEN LADEN!! DANKE

related: Danke!!! [for the sarcasm]

Tags: "customer service" · Berlin · Deutsche · more aggressive than passive

Bizarre pardoning accident

June 17th, 2008 · 105 Comments

While waiting for the coffee maker to do its job, nickster2000 wandered over to the university notice board, where this musician-wanted ad caught his eye. He’s not a drummer, but says he considered ringing them up anyway. “I just really need to know what was so bad about Graham.”

katlama require drummer for regular gigging. previous applicants may apply again...except Graham

related: I used to be your biggest fan

extra credit: Katlama on MySpace

Tags: band · Birmingham · college life · help wanted · most popular notes of 2008 · U.K.

Perverse and often baffling

May 6th, 2008 · 120 Comments

Which clip art catastrophe raises the most new and troubling questions in your mind?

Is it exhibit a, from New York’s West Village?

Please please please...no dogs

(Think about the designer’s thought process here for a moment. Why the sunglasses? And not just any shades…but electric blue? Ditto, the sunflower.)

Exhibit b, From a casino in Cambodia?

(Does no crossed out mean…yes?)

Or exhibit c, from a pharmacy in Berlin?
Vitamine sind jetzt wichtig!

(Trust me: speaking German is no help here.)

If you can’t decide, remember that your first instinct is usually the best choice (um, except when it’s not).

related: clip art crimes

Tags: Berlin · Cambodia · clip art catastrophe · Deutsche · dogs · New York · you be the judge

Help yourself

March 24th, 2008 · 43 Comments

Spotted by doppelfrog at London’s Paddington station…

help yourself

related: Water, water everywhere

Tags: "customer service" · London · rhetorical question · warning · water · whiteboard

Everything you hate about office culture, in one cringe-inducing note.

March 21st, 2008 · 121 Comments

This note represents pretty much everything about office culture that makes me cringe. Appropriately enough, I can’t even bring myself to call out the specifics — it’s just too overwhelming. (But the sign will always be there…every day, taunting me.)

PLEASE MAKE SURE I AM CLOSED I HAVE ALOT OF FOODS IN MY BELLY I DON'T WANT TO GET WARM!

Tags: alot · anthropomorphism · CAPS LOCK · fridge · inane cartoon · kinda creepy · mixed metaphors · most popular notes of 2008 · Say wha? · spelling and grammar police · U.K.

Oxford drama

March 2nd, 2008 · 132 Comments

Our submitter found this glorious piece of work on the door to the common room at her Oxford University dorm. “The guy who left it was a 6’5 redheaded dude who wore cravats,” she says. “No one was gonna fuck with him.” (I don’t really understand the causality there, but I’m gonna let that one go.)

I will give Dustin this much, though: through the pain, he always tells the truth.

I broke a glass because I don't always know my own strength

related: come get some

Tags: college life · just an asshole · most popular notes of 2008 · signed with love · U.K. · warning