Entries Tagged as 'Europe'

How do you like them eggs?

April 1st, 2013 · 71 Comments

If you found yesterday’s post too saccharine for your taste, well, here’s a different sort of mother-daughter exchange. Hannah found this card nestled among a basket of Easter eggs that her mom gave her.

To Hannah, Happy Easter from the mother who 'f-cked up' your life and has done 'nothing' for you!

related: I can has guilt trip?

extra credit: “Family’s Easter decorations have neighbour hopping mad” [cbcnews]

Tags: Easter · U.K.

No Soup for You!

February 11th, 2013 · 79 Comments

Writes Jonathan in the UK: “Nick, bless him, diligently cleans the office microwave when he’s at work every Sunday morning. By Monday, the smell of bleach has usually gone. However, I think the latest soup splattering may have pushed him over the edge.”

I spent a fair few minutes making this oven clean on Sunday and in 24 hours it is again covered in soup -  Firstly drinking soup is the act of a fool as its salt content will contribute to high blood pressure but leaving an oven in this state is plain unpleasant -  It means that those of us that that (sic) have basic hygiene standards now can not use the microwave oven unless we clean it after you use it.  Please if you had soup on Monday can you consider your actions and what you have left for others.  NP

related: If you thought your microwave was dirty…

Tags: food · microwave · office · U.K.

Point (not) Taken

January 21st, 2013 · 49 Comments

David in Nottingham, England says that one of his neighbors has been continually leaving bags of junk in the building’s common area, despite the fact that the communal waste bin is located just a few feet away on the other side of the door.

David says the first (un-photographed) notice said something along the lines of, “Come on man, we’re not animals.” The management company then wrote a letter to all tenants — again, to no avail. Apparently, the only recourse left was to get Liam Neeson on the phone.

I don't know who you are or why you keep leaving bags of crap here, but if you don't stop doing it I will find you, and I will kill you.

Meanwhile, in Allentown, Pennsylvania:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my package go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will hit you, REALLY hard.

related: Dear Whoever Stole My Amazon Package

Tags: garbage · most popular notes of 2013 · neighbors · Nottingham · shameless meme-mongering · U.K.

Pissed off (but ever-so-polite)

January 13th, 2013 · 48 Comments

In the U.K. —more so than anywhere else — self-proclaimed “polite notices” are quite often anything but. Take, for example, these two notices, both from London.

POLITE NOTICE To whom it may concern: Stop pissing all over the lavatory like a f*cking animal. What is wrong with your p*nis? Is it a corkscrew? Does it flick around like hosepipe? Here's an idea — trying pointing it even vaguely towards the water. You might enjoy the tinkly sound. Give it a shot. Go on. You f*cking animal.

POLITE NOTICE Your dog? Your shit! If I catch you, I will make YOU EAT IT!!!

related: A polite notice from New Zealand

Tags: "polite notice" · dogs · London · most popular notes of 2013 · piss · shit · toilet · U.K.

Welcome Back to Work

January 2nd, 2013 · 31 Comments

I’m normally not the littering type, but something about this mess of bullet points makes me want to upend the nearest trash can and just go absolutely apeshit. (And how was your holiday, boss?)

Please Please put all your rubbish away in a bin. There is probably a bin right next to you. Be a conscientious worker. Your good attitude will be noted. We are all here to help.

related: Clues that you might be trapped in a soul-sucking job

 

Tags: Birmingham · garbage · now that's management · U.K.

A rash of mysterious rashes

December 20th, 2012 · 33 Comments

While walking down a quiet street in Leicester, England, Tom saw this “ANGRY CAPITALISED note” in the window of a house. “Amid so many unanswered questions,” Tom says, “one thing is for sure: Mike has a window and he ain’t afraid to use it.”

Carla and Hilary, I hope that your hideous rashes go away soon. It really sucks that Leah gave it to you. The symptoms sound repulsive! As for Liz, that thing on your...you know..well I hope that heals quickly as well. Kristy, congratulations on your clean bill of health! Mike

related: Desperately Seeking Closure

Tags: public shaming · U.K. · WTF?

It helps to have friends in high places

December 9th, 2012 · 42 Comments

Writes Rob in Brighton: “We live on a middle-class urban street with too many cars and people who think they have a God-given right to a place. Sometimes people push their luck and make life difficult for others with their parking, and hilarity ensues.” One Sunday, Father Kevin even got in on the action…followed by his boss.

You have parked your car like an idiot!  You are blocking the (obvious) entrance to the Church Car Park — today (Sunday) it would be in continuous use. You've parked well on to the double yellow line. —Father Kevin (Parish Priest)   You are Forgiven. Love, Jesus

Meanwhile, in South Carolina…

Everytime you steal this parking spot you kill a kitten Do you want to be a kitten killer? Jesus is watching

related: Your car has been “baptized”

Tags: Jesus · parking · U.K.

Are you Facebook friends with your landlord?

December 3rd, 2012 · 59 Comments

Ryan’s friend M is “…very direct, let’s say.” So when her property management company sent Facebook friend requests to her and her housemates — after ignoring countless communications about various maintenance issues — Ryan knew the results would be “interesting, let’s say.”

no problem! i did it because you're useless and ignore my texts and emails so i thought i would try this. fix our shower! its been broken since we moved in!

related: Well, that’s one way to get your landlord’s attention

Tags: Facebook · landlords and property managers · public shaming · smiley · Wales

If at first you don’t succeed…

November 19th, 2012 · 21 Comments

Imagine this: You’re about to pen a note to post in the office men’s room, but you’re torn — should you go for the patronizing approach, or opt for some sarcastic reverse psychology?

At Colin’s office in London, the note-writer apparently decided: ¿Por qué no los dos? 

Please do not leave waste paper on the floor. This is usually managed by manually picking up any paper you may accidentally drop, and then transferring it to a recognised place of refuse. Thank you for your cooperation.  Please leave as much paper as you wish on the floor, after all, who cares?

(As always, click the image above to enlarge.)

related: The never-ending (and completely unnecessary) battle between basic hygiene and basic courtesy

Tags: a little patronizing · bathroom · blitzkrieg approach · London · office · toilet paper

Ironic moustache alert!

November 15th, 2012 · 46 Comments

Writes our submitter, Iris: “East London’s Brick Lane is the city’s hipster epicenter. A nearby pub had clearly had enough of being flooded by ironic facial hair and cardigans.”

WARNING! All Hipsters MUST be accompanied by a responsible Adult! Love, BrewDog x

related: Unattended children will be shot.

extra credit: It’s Movember! 

Tags: bar · London · most popular notes of 2012 · warning