Entries Tagged as 'U.K.'

No, not the stink eye!

April 3rd, 2014 · 25 Comments

Writes our submitter in Leeds: “I enjoy the fact that a second piece of paper had to be added to express the full rage of this (presumably wet-footed) person.”

To the guy who pissed in the lift on Sunday Morning, You are DISGUSTING! I hope you woke up with a massive hangover and are now hanging your head in shame that the lovely people of A block were unknowingly walking your urine around, and undoubtedly into their flats! I may not have fully seen your face, but your navy shift and hair cut should hopefully allow me to recognize you, and give you a look of shame at your disgusting behavior! Use a toilet next time, it's not hard.

related: Lift or Loo?

Tags: drizzunk · elevator · piss · public shaming · that's disgusting · U.K.

Fever pitch

January 6th, 2014 · 57 Comments

Rob and Karen in the U.K. both passed along this note, recently covered in the Manchester Evening News, that was found posted on seats at the Stockport County FC’s home stadium. (Is this what hooliganism looks like in the lower divisions nowadays?)

To: The two guys in black leather jackets who have recently started sitting in these seats. Sorry. There's no way to put this without hurting your feelings, but one or both of you stinks and it is ruining the experience of those around you. Many of us are season ticket holders and it is very unfair that we have to spend the best part of two hours every game with a foul smell like this around us. Please either have a good wash and change your clothes or go and sit elsewhere. Thanks. And yes, it is that bad.

related: Are you ready for some football?!

Tags: Manchester · odor

Also, kindly refrain from rinsing your laundry in the hot tub

December 9th, 2013 · 69 Comments

Writes Natalie in Cardiff: “I noticed this a little while ago in the changing rooms of my local leisure centre. I thought it fit in nicely with the public/private restroom notes these last couple of days. Perhaps people in South Wales are a little mixed-up too!”

Customer Notice: Female Dryside Changing Area - Customers are reminded that the practice of hair dying [sic] and shaving within the changing area is strictly prohibited. Please use in accordance with its intended purpose. Thank you in anticipation of your cooperation

related: Hair-raising indignation

extra credit: Weird Wales [bbc.co.uk]

Tags: gym · hygiene · Wales

Fish fingers and custard, then, yeah?

November 13th, 2013 · 36 Comments

Our submitter, Gavin, saw this note displayed prominently on the wall in the lounge/bar area of a 104-year-old fishermen’s club in Sussex, England.

“I found it quite touching that they’d selected tomato-coloured ink to write the note in no-nonsense Times New Roman ALL CAPS,” Gavin says. And while he hasn’t a clue as to the identity of the culprit or the circumstances involved, “I doubt that this person is popular with the club committee.”

COULD THE PERSON WHO KEEPS THROWING TOMATO JUICE ALL OVER THE FLOOR HERE PLEASE STOP WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE

related: Trust me, I’m the Doctor.

Tags: I know who you are · so this is a thing? · U.K.

The mystery of the mischievous, murderous cat

October 16th, 2013 · 77 Comments

Toby in the U.K. found this note taped to his front door, and found it a bit baffling — not to mention disturbing — given that he doesn’t own a cat. “I can only imagine what these ‘defensive measures’ might be,” Toby says. “I hope the cat in question can avoid them.”

And when it comes to the idea of “disciplining” your cat, I can’t even imagine what that might mean.

(just click the image below to enlarge)

Dear Neighbour,  Please can you stop your cat coming into my house. I have to leave my cat flap open for my cat but your cat is causing lots of mischeif. It is a black long haired cat I have seen you feeding him so I know he is your cat. She has already pooped on my rug which cost £50 (and another £30 to clean) and last week he was trying to murder the goldfish in my pond. Please discipline your cat or I will be forced to take defensive measures, and it would be better for all concerned if it does not come to that.  With Kind Regards, Howard  (From No. 32, the house with the blue door)

related: Your cat. Your choice.

Tags: cats · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · Oops? · questionable logic · U.K.

Well, this sucks.

August 25th, 2013 · 24 Comments

Danny works for a small print company in London. “Our lovely cleaner only comes in once a week, so it falls upon the rest of us to keep the office neat and tidy.” Danny says that, judging from this creation — made up hundreds of punched paper holes — “I’ve got a feeling that someone feels that they are doing more than their fair share.”

HOOVER

related: Could somebody less important than me take care of this?

Tags: cleaning · London · office

Humbleshagbrag

August 4th, 2013 · 68 Comments

Writes James in Newcastle, England: “This weekend my girlfriend, who lives 180 miles away, came to visit me. As you would expect, we got up to the horizontal shuffle. In the morning this note was passed under my door. I am thinking of having it framed.”

I'm sorry your sexual adventures are so un-frequent that you have to let the whole house know about it.

related: Your sexy schoolgirl girlfriend is frightening the kittens

Tags: roommates · sex sex sex · U.K.

Actually, we have a garden for that

July 22nd, 2013 · 54 Comments

Rachel in the U.K. found this note pushed through the letterbox this morning. “This the first note either I or my boyfriend have had regarding any kind of ‘leek,’” she says. “I just checked both the bathroom and the kitchen for anything watery where it shouldn’t be and there’s nothing, so I’m very confused. I’m not sure what she wants us to sort, either. Exciting stuff!”

This is the second time Ive had to wright to you. and I'm slowly getting annoyed. You seem to have a leek in your bathroom that is slowly ruining my newly decorated bathroom. I now have bubbles and cracks in my ceiling which will now need repainting! If you don't get it sorted I will and the bill will be fixed to your address! No. 26

related: Drippy faucets

Tags: bathroom · neighbors · spelling and grammar police · U.K.

People should no

July 21st, 2013 · 37 Comments

Rob lives in a seaside town in the U.K. He and several other neighbo(u)rs recently received versions of this handwritten note, seemingly written by an ex-employee of a hot dog stall at a nearby fairground.

Writes Rob: “It’s not quite clear who the notewriter is or exactly what the problem is. Is it the hot dogs? It is the van? Is it the terrible grammar? It is the writer responsible for the ‘handling’ of the ‘disgusting’ food? Who is the mysterious friend who was ill for 3 weeks? What is it that people should ‘no’?”

Mrs Shearan and her daughter own a hot hot dog & burger van at the fair ground, I worked.  For them, and found the handling of the food was disgusting they have been warned, if you visit them this easter they are not what they seem next to the hot dog & burger van they have a childrens amusement their name is on the van,  (people should no [sic] about them iff [sic] they have children, my friend was ill for 3 weeks)

related: Small-town swimming pool rules

Tags: food · spelling and grammar police · that's disgusting · U.K.

It’s Friday, Friday…

June 21st, 2013 · 22 Comments

…time to pay rent on Friday. (Hint, hint.)

Girl A: Need to party tonight Girl B: u also need 2 pay rent 4 d last few months

related: A message for our former housemate

Tags: Facebook · money · roommates · U.K.