Entries Tagged as 'London'

If at first you don’t succeed…

November 19th, 2012 · 21 Comments

Imagine this: You’re about to pen a note to post in the office men’s room, but you’re torn — should you go for the patronizing approach, or opt for some sarcastic reverse psychology?

At Colin’s office in London, the note-writer apparently decided: ¿Por qué no los dos? 

Please do not leave waste paper on the floor. This is usually managed by manually picking up any paper you may accidentally drop, and then transferring it to a recognised place of refuse. Thank you for your cooperation.  Please leave as much paper as you wish on the floor, after all, who cares?

(As always, click the image above to enlarge.)

related: The never-ending (and completely unnecessary) battle between basic hygiene and basic courtesy

Tags: a little patronizing · bathroom · blitzkrieg approach · London · office · toilet paper

Ironic moustache alert!

November 15th, 2012 · 46 Comments

Writes our submitter, Iris: “East London’s Brick Lane is the city’s hipster epicenter. A nearby pub had clearly had enough of being flooded by ironic facial hair and cardigans.”

WARNING! All Hipsters MUST be accompanied by a responsible Adult! Love, BrewDog x

related: Unattended children will be shot.

extra credit: It’s Movember! 

Tags: bar · London · most popular notes of 2012 · warning

Everything but the actual kitchen sink

October 22nd, 2012 · 23 Comments

Writes Jocelyn in London: “Since moving into halls for the first year of university, our hygiene skills have gone downhill, to say the least. Finally, one of our roommates cracked and cleaned up the rotting mess…or so we thought.” Instead, he just found a new “dumping ground.”

I needed to wash a mug so I made room in the sink. Please stop using the sink & tops as a dumping ground! Sincerly [sic] Cameron xx

related: May the sanctity of the sink prevail!

Tags: college life · dishes · London · roommates

60% of the time it works every time

May 5th, 2012 · 30 Comments

Pat in London works for a large office, where, unfortunately for the many java addicts on staff, the coffeemaker has a habit of breaking down. Also, Pat says, “It’s an advertising agency, so there are lots of grammar pedants.” The result?

OUT OF ORDER - engineer called -  I SAID OUT OF ORDER - WHICH MEANS NO YOU CANNOT HAVE A COFFEE - Well...you can try if you feel lucky... - There is another coffee machine on the fifth floor - But no toilets... - Except for the two that are there... - LOUD NOISES - 60% of the time it works every time - Stop wasting VALUABLe office stationary - <--stationery --- WRITE RESPONSIBLY -- Nothing in this place works! -- I prefer tea anyway :(

related: Just be glad you don’t know what’s in the coffee

Tags: coffee · London · note wars · office · smartass · spelling and grammar police

Right…that seems like a logical response.

March 13th, 2012 · 49 Comments

Dave in London returned home one day to find all of his clothes missing. Apparently, this was his roommate’s rationale.

When you slam the door I woke up and feel deprived of sleep all night. Therefore I took your clothes. I hope you got the point.

related: “Dollar sign flower slams easily”

Tags: door-slamming · London · roommates

The Vicar of Glibly

February 6th, 2012 · 29 Comments

Spotted by George outside his local church in East London:

The vicarage drive is in constant use. Please consider your ETERNAL SALVATION before parking here without permission!

related: He died for your clip art

Tags: God · London · parking · you're like so going to hell

Happy National Sandwich Day!

November 3rd, 2011 · 80 Comments

Would you care to furnish the last line of this haiku?

Who stole my sandwich! (Could it be the) SANDWICH THIEF!!

related: Sandwich guilt

extra credit: Lunch Bugs Anti-Theft Sandwich Bags

Tags: food · London · office fridge · smartass · stealing

Hampstead Row Houses (and Rows over Houses)

September 18th, 2011 · 36 Comments

David spotted this oh-so-charming scene while cycling through the well-to-do area of Hampstead, London.

Adds David: “The completely knackered fence is in front of an overgrown plot and right next door to a well looked-after house (possibly owned by old folk who are convinced the neighbourhood has gone to ruin.”)

This disgraceful eyesore of a fence is owned by a firm of architects. A profession dedicated to the art of landscaping!

This disgraceful eyesore of a fence is owned by a firm of architects. A profession dedicated to the art of landscaping!

Meanwhile, Alison was a bit perplexed by this note (and the seemingly undisturbed hedge below) in West Hampstead. “I stared at the hedge for ages trying to work out what was wrong with it,” she says. “Finally I just took a picture and ran away.”

We apologise for the state of this hedge. It is the result of an act of vandalism by a resident in this building. We are taking action.

We apologise for the state of this hedge. It is the result of an act of vandalism by a resident in this building. We are taking action.

related: An eye for an eye, an eyesore for an eyesore

extra credit: An American’s Guide to Britishisms [effingpot.com]

Tags: flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · London · public shaming · there goes the neighborhood · vandalism

Do as I say, not as I do

May 2nd, 2011 · 33 Comments

First up: a peek inside the recently renovated dressing rooms at London’s swank Royal Albert Hall. Adds our submitter: “You can just feel the glamour, can’t you?”

Please do not hang anything from the pipes (except notices about pipes)

Meanwhile, in the breakroom at Ashley’s office, even snarky responses get their own frames. Now that’s classy.

 [note 1:] DO NOT PUT ANY THING ON TOP OF THIS FRIDGE. THANKS! MGT [note 2:] DO NOT PUT ANYTHING ON TOP OF THIS FRIDGE EXCEPT NOTES TELLING PEOPLE NOT TO PUT ANYTHING ON TOP OF THIS FRIDGE. THANKS!

related: Please refrain from unintentional irony

Tags: clip art catastrophe · London · rebuttals

Mean Mr. Mustard

April 22nd, 2011 · 97 Comments

Abbey Road Studios is a must-see on almost any Beatles aficionado’s tour of London. Once there, a curious sort of tourist delirium seems to take hold. People feel absolutely compelled to recreate the iconic album cover, in the same way that visitors to Pisa just have to get a shot of of themselves holding up the leaning tower.

The only hitch? That famous zebra crossing actually goes across a fully functioning road — one with cars and buses holding people who, one would assume, have better things to do than watch you fiddle with your zoom lens.

Rachel in London was therefore more a little amused to see this note from a fellow local amongst the assorted “I <3 Paul” and “I am the Walrus”-type scrawls that cover the walls near the crossing. ”I love the drawing, as it’s so true,” Rachel says. “It’s just a crossing people!!! It’s not like the Beatles are coming back to see you do this!”

Hey! You need to sort out the way you walk across Abbey Road you ridiculous people. (Yeah! have some respect!)

Interestingly, while the Beatles themselves aren’t likely to be watching, thanks to the existence of the (strangely hypnotic) 24-hour Abbey Road webcam, you can actually watch this idiocy as it happens — over and over and over again.

related: Meanwhile, on Portabello Road

extra credit: Photoclichés.com

Tags: etiquette · London · most popular notes of 2011 · that's disrespectful · tourists