Precious in Texas says that whenever her mother comes over to visit, “all she wants to do is clean my messy house.” One day, Precious says, her daughter, Allison — along with Allison’s 5-year-old cousin — decided to take matters into their own hands, writing this warning and handing it to their grandma “fast mail.” As for Grandma’s response, says Precious, “I had to read it to her because she was laughing so hard.”
Entries Tagged as 'Grandma'
October 2nd, 2013 · 78 Comments
August 28th, 2013 · 50 Comments
“My dear, sweet grandmother is a treasure in my life,” writes Jessi in Dallas. To her horror, however, she realized — upon receiving this anonymous postcard from ‘a friend,’ — that she had forgotten to wish her grandmother a happy birthday this year.
Already feeling pretty guilty, says Jessi: “I immediately called her and received an additional 40-minute guilt trip over the phone. Today I sent her a birthday card in the mail.” Still, Jessi can’t help but how long it’ll be before she makes it off of Grandma’s “naughty list.”
July 30th, 2013 · 39 Comments
Writes June in Georgia: “I like tattoos. A lot. I have several, and my grandparents got to see a *few* of them for the first time during my trip to visit them in California over Labor Day weekend. Let’s just say they were…less than thrilled.” Still, that that didn’t stop Grandma and Grandpa from slipping little Junie an envelope with a bit of cash for the trip home. “I can’t imagine what they are trying to tell me!” says June.
Meanwhile, Annika in Inuvik, Canada got this bill as part of her change from a cabbie. (She passed it on later that day when she bought lunch — handing it to the cashier note-side-down.)
May 11th, 2011 · 92 Comments
Grandmas: they can kiss you on the cheek while punching you in the gut, and you’ll still write a thank-you note…or wish you had. BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU WOULDN’T BE HERE.
related: But…but…I didn’t forget!
P.S. By the way, Grandma Cookie, I did call you at Palm Garden on Mother’s Day — three times — but you didn’t answer. But, um, Happy Mother’s Day?
Dear Grandma: Thanks for saving me the trouble of sending you a thank-you note by writing one yourself.
March 3rd, 2011 · 178 Comments
Explains Megan: “My grandmother is extremely particular about her grandchildren when it comes to writing letters, especially handwritten thank-you notes. (My cousins and I often spend family events comparing the consequences we’ve endured for taking too long to mail the proper correspondence.)”
Megan recently moved, so she didn’t get around to sending Grandma a heartfelt thank you for her Valentine’s gift as quickly as usual. Instead, she got beaten to the punch. Within a week and a half of Valentine’s Day, this postcard (from guess who?) showed up in Megan’s mailbox.
February 15th, 2011 · 37 Comments
Katie doesn’t remember writing this note (which she found while going through old papers of her mom’s) but says, “I do feel sorry for little 11-year-old me, having to deal with being falsely accused of *gasp* faking illness to get out of school, and then having to deal with the humiliation of public grandma affection.”
Adds Katie: “My favorite part is at the beginning where I unintentionally implied that my mother was some kind of slut. (At the time, she worked around a lot of truckers and always had funny stories about them trying to hit on her.) Also, you can totally tell that we had worked on letter-writing/dialogue skills in school recently.”
related: A thinly veiled tattletale
extra credit: “I Enjoy Being a Girl, Sort of” [This American Life]
April 15th, 2010 · 126 Comments
“My grandmother has been telling my brother that his hair is too long for forever now,” our submitter in Texas writes, “and whenever she criticized his long hair, he’d tell her it was ‘in style.’” Hello, loophole! Today Grandma left this clipping on the fridge for her grandson to find.
(By the way, if you’ve managed to avoid contact with the tween set lately and had no idea that this Justin Bieber character is supposedly “the world’s biggest pop star” — you’re not alone.)
And Grandma, if Seth doesn’t take the hint, maybe you’ll have to try Star Magazine‘s trick?
extra credit: Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber
The Justin Bieber Guide for Old People [gawker.com]
Justin Bieber’s “hair trick” [youtube]
March 8th, 2010 · 63 Comments
Grandmothers live for thank you notes — receiving them, writing them, not-so-subtly inquiring whether one might be forthcoming.
Jennifer in Michigan received this gracious note of thanks after a Christmas visit to her Grandma. Cue the violins, please…
(If you can’t read Grandma cursive, just mouse over the note for a transcription.)
related: Really, Mom, you shouldn’t have
January 26th, 2010 · 185 Comments
Joel in Glendale, California was raised in a religious Christian family, and apparently someone let it slip to his grandmother (bless her heart!) that he’s — gasp!— an atheist. Aaaaand…let the backhanded compliments begin!
Dear Joel, I have heard that you say you’re an athesis [sic]. I don’t believe that because you have so many Christian qualities. You are honest, loyal, kind and giving- not to mention handsome and extremely talented. (Now —Those are gifts from God!) Please use this check to have a great New Years day Breakfast.
Adds Joel: “I’d like to point out that she mailed me this check for $20 after I asked her not to send me money and she promised she wouldn’t. Lying isn’t very Christian, Grandma!”
November 3rd, 2009 · 81 Comments
While some old folks (and grandmothers in particular) are seasoned masters of the heart-tugging passive-aggressive guilt trip, there’s another breed of blue-hairs who’ve seemingly given up on all the social niceties and instead just give their unfiltered opinion on any subject at hand. their all-purpose excuse, as demonstrated by this example from Tacoma, Washington: “I’m old!”
Yet while this group certainly helps make reading the “letters to the editor” page entertaining, Charity in Westfield, Wisconsin says the “grumpy old crank” routine isn’t quite as amusing when you have to live with one of them.
“I’ve been staying with my grandmother for two months,” Charity says, and “she tells me daily that I stink.” She woke up one morning to find this slightly more polite message….which was not-so-politely attached to toilet seat with packing tape.
related: A day in the life of a crank