Entries Tagged as 'family'

That’s a drawing of a grill, okay?

July 26th, 2012 · 39 Comments

Okay, I think everyone’s had enough of the Outdoor Cat Debate of 2012. Perhaps a little double entendre to lighten the mood? Alrighty then!

This piece by Jamie’s daughter was hanging on the wall outside her classroom during Parent’s Day at the school. “She had no idea why it was funny to us,” Jamie says. (Her daughter’s teacher, meanwhile…)

My mother's favorite food is Dad's meet [sic]

related: “Drunk Mommy”

P.S. The passive-aggressive part of this note is the crappy watermark. I hate watermarks. Screw you, karma/pageview whores!

Tags: double-entendre alert · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2012 · not so much passive-aggressive

Please, Mom, anything but showers!

July 17th, 2012 · 30 Comments

Explains a mom in Oregon: “This note was left outside the kids’ bedroom door after I sent them to a time out for pouring all of the shampoo and facewash in the entire bathroom into the bathtub. I told them I couldn’t trust them not to do that so they would have to stick to showers instead of baths for the time being.”

Man, I just love it when kids threaten their parents with the silent treatment.

Please, Mom, anything but showers!

 

related: An official declaration of the silent treatment

Tags: kids · most popular notes of 2012 · Mother-son notes · Oregon

Jimmy Wilkinson, Hopeless Romantic

July 1st, 2012 · 40 Comments

Nathan says this sign has been up in his South Texas hometown for several years now. He’s checked back every once in a while, but so far, no updates have materialized.

Jimmy Wilkinson owes his sister $2500 for his divorce from his 4th wife to marry his 5th wife who is also his 2nd ex wife. If you see him let him know. Check back for new updates.

Perhaps Jimmy should have sprung for this deal?

Buy one divorce, get your next one 1/2 off

related: The Window of Shame

Tags: family · money · public shaming · small town living · Texas

My Dad weighs 15 pounds, does not have a job, and likes to wear shirts.

June 26th, 2012 · 87 Comments

Jill’s seven-year-old son “made” this for his Dad at school. “We’d like to think the near-complete lack of effort reflects a lack of enthusiasm for school assignments and is not a sign of a profound rift in his relationship with his father,” she says.

“And for the record, my husband is not 20 years old, weights more than 15 pounds and is taller than 2’1″. And he has a job, as a writer. (Which, to be fair, can sure look a lot like “unemployed” sometimes.)

My Dad's Favorites Food: I don't know Dessert: No idea Game to play: ? Sport to watch: hockey on TV Restaurant: Does not have one My favorite memory with my dad is: I don't have one. My dad is the best in the family at: NO ANSWER. At his job, my dad: He does not have a job.  When not at work, my dad likes to: ? My dad is: 20 years old. My dad is: 2 ft 1 in tall. My dad weighs 15 pounds. My dad has gray hair. My dad has black eyes. My dad likes to wear shirts. My dad is special to me because...He is special to me but I don't have a reason.

P.S. The bit at the bottom says: “He is special to me but I don’t have a reason.”

related: “Drunk Mommy”

Tags: Canada · Father-son notes · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2012 · schools & teachers

Father’s Day Faux Pas

June 17th, 2012 · 48 Comments

Based on the dots between the words (a technique picked up at Montessori School), Lauren in Vancouver estimates she was about six years old when she wrote this note (translation below):

Dad, I am angry because you throwed away your father’s day present. If I catch you doing it again, I will hit you hard. Signed, Lauren.

Dad, I am angry because you throwed away your father's day present. If I catch you doing it again, I will hit you hard. Signed, Lauren.

In her father’s defense, “The gift in question was a giant, brightly-coloured fish made out of paper and stuffed with newsprint,” Lauren says. “I remember finding the ‘present’ in the garbage and putting it back on my father’s desk, which is probably where the threat came in.”

And then, of course, there’s the troll dad approach…

Troll dad does it right

related: An honest Father’s Day card

extra credit: Dads on Vacation [tumblr]

Tags: Father-daughter notes · kids · Moms & Dads · not-so-veiled threats

The Silent Treatment

June 8th, 2012 · 68 Comments

Tom’s daughter, Meg, was upset that her mother made her a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner, so she wrote this note to inform her mom of her “punishment.”

Sorry Mom but you knew I do not like cheese I am not going to talk!

Meanwhile, in Salt Lake City, six-year-old Elizabeth tried a similar approach. Her parents were so amused they’ve held on the note for decades since then.

I have taped my mouth shut so I won't have a crying fit. I hope you're happy I really do mom and dad

When I have kids, I really hope I can manipulate them into this sort of thinking…

related: Buckets of my Tears

Tags: cheese · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2012

Really? You couldn’t just stick with carnations?

May 30th, 2012 · 42 Comments

“Apparently my dear Dad was the glue that held our family together, because it has totally disintegrated after his passing in 1999,” writes our submitter in Massachusetts.

After years of putting up with “greedy demands, backstabbing, and sheer fuckery amongst the moochers in the clan,” our submitter recently visited her father’s grave to discover this unsigned note perched on top. (Underneath it, she presumes, her Dad was rolling over.)

Really? You couldn't just stick with carnations?

related: For sale, cemetery plot, never used.

Tags: family · signed with love · that's disrespectful

Praise the Lord and pass the sibling rivalry!

April 6th, 2012 · 38 Comments

Kaylee in Colorado recently found this note when going through a box of old stuff at her parents’ house. At the time this was written, she says, “I would have been about 6 and my brother 10. I fought my boredom during our weekly visits to church by doodling and writing my mother notes.”

Dear Mom, PRAISE THE LORD!! I love you, and thank you for bringing me to praise the lord each day. I love the Lord. Thank you for marring dad and making Wesley and I brother and sister. But I think you should of had me first. Love, Kaylee PS on back

P.S. Kaylee says the “PS.” on the back was “let dad read note.”

related: Happy Passover, fatty!

Tags: family · God · kids · siblings · signed with love

No Dumping Zone

January 30th, 2012 · 40 Comments

To me this sounds suspiciously like an episode of The League, but Stephen from Cherry Hill, New Jersey claims his daughter recently caught him heading into the bathroom “for a little sit-down,” laptop in hand. When five-year-old Rosie asked why Daddy was bringing his computer into the fecal mist zone, he replied, “Multi-tasking.”

A few minutes later, Rosie slipped the following note under the door. (The drawing had already been done earlier.)

What are you thinking Dad? That's a horrible thing to do.

Translation: What are you thinking Dad? That’s a horrible thing to do.

Can you really argue with her?

related: Never put nature aside for television.

Tags: Father-daughter notes · hygiene · kids · New Jersey

Daddy dearest

January 19th, 2012 · 25 Comments

Writes Virginia in Sumner, Washington: “Going through a box of old photographs in the attic, I found this birthday card I gave my father when I was five or six. I was a terrible child.”

You should spend more time with me but I love you anyway. Happy Birthday Dad

related: Some daughterly wisdom for Dad

Tags: birthday · Father-daughter notes · guilt trip · heart · kids · signed with love · xoxo