Entries Tagged as 'family'

Our Lady of Passive-Aggression

September 27th, 2011 · 35 Comments

“My friend and her mother have little exchanges like this via Facebook all the time,” says our anonymous submitter. “It’s always lovely to get these little peeks into their relationship.”

Mom: Well, I know you didn't go to church to worship but I am very pleased to see you have at least been inside one since you got there. This is very pretty.

related: Best wishes, godless heathens!

Tags: Facebook · guilt trip · Jesus · Mother-daughter notes

Hello Kitty says: “Unconditional love can be complicated!”

September 23rd, 2011 · 59 Comments

Melody in Schenectady, New York says her 7-year-old daughter, Emma, is constantly writing little stories and whatnot, which inevitably end up all over the house. As Melody was picking up some of Emma’s latest scraps, she found this note addressed to her 4-year-old sister.

Hay Addison, I thingk you sud be niser to me i still love y(ou) but your driv me crase. Love, Emma

related: S is for sibling rivalry

Tags: kids · New York · siblings · signed with love

“Write what you know,” as the saying goes

September 16th, 2011 · 41 Comments

When Shelby‘s third-grade son was having trouble with his homework assignment (two paragraphs of creative writing a day), her suggestion was to just write about what came to mind first. As she realized later when she found the page in a stack of old school work: “He did not hold back.”

My evil mom forced me write these horrible words. Five times each. And she tortured me by making me write 200 words. Now my arm hurts really bad. Now she's torturing me some more by making me write this stupid two paragraphs. I wish that she will stop torturing me!

related: “Drunk Mommy

extra credit: “Don’t Write What You Know” [theAtlantic.com]

Tags: kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2011 · San Diego

I pita the fool

August 17th, 2011 · 86 Comments

Writes Elizabeth in Massachusetts: “My dad has taken to mixing hummus and tabbouleh in a bowl and eating it like that, which some reason, drives my brother absolutely crazy. I looked in the fridge today and was not surprised at all to find this note, which my dad ignored.”

This is a dip; it should be accompanied by another piece of food such as a pita chip, pita bread, etc. Not to be eaten with just a spoon.

Something tells me Elizabeth’s brother might also have an opinion about whether toast can or cannot be refrigerated…and perhaps the appropriateness of Cinnamon Roll Casserole as a workplace snack.

related: The most inane thing since sliced bread

Tags: "helpful" advice · a matter of taste · Father-son notes · food · fridge · Massachusetts

So, Mom, what you’re telling me is to cover up with a latex catsuit?

August 7th, 2011 · 34 Comments

Joy’s mother is the type who says things like, “Joy! CLEAVAGE is not going to get you a JOB!” In one her more subtle moves, Joy says, “My mom clipped this ‘article’ out of her favorite nutjob newsletter and mailed it to me —with annotations to be sure I didn’t miss the point.”

JOY, read please.

Thanks for the new role model, Mom! Because, as everyone knows, Michelle Pfeiffer’s career has been propelled more than anything else by her “prudishness.”

related: Grandma’s advice: Be more like Bieber.

Tags: a matter of taste · Moms & Dads · Mother-daughter notes

Nicely played, sir.

August 1st, 2011 · 168 Comments

Explains Haley in Canada: “My friend Laura took $20 from her dad’s wallet and left a note telling him she needed it for parking. When she got home later, she found this.”

Laura, I took a pair of your jeans to pay for bread and a few grams of cold cuts. Love, Dad (AKA; VP)

Laura, I took a pair of your jeans to pay for bread and a few grams of cold cuts. Love, Dad (AKA; VP)

related: Dad holds the kitteh hostage

Tags: actually totally reasonable · Canada · Father-daughter notes · Moms & Dads · money · oh snap · signed with love

The Tooth Fairy meets Tiger Mother, with a dash of “Go the F**k to Sleep”

July 19th, 2011 · 29 Comments

If you’re too jaded to handle the cuteness factor of kids’ overly-demanding notes to the Tooth Fairy, you still might get kick out of this tooth-in-cheek note from the Tooth Fairy herself.

Explains Mindi (a.k.a. Mindy) from Santa Cruz, California: “In elementary school, I played the string bass in the school orchestra, and my parents were paying for private tutoring lessons. Obviously, I wasn’t practicing enough!”

Mindy, You must practice your bass or I won't be back again. Signed The Tooth Fairy

Adds Mindi: “I later cut this out and put it in my scrapbook. (The ‘really?’ on the side was mine.)”

related: Not to be hard, but I need money.

extra credit: Go to F**ck to Sleep [amazon.com]

Tags: California · kids · Moms & Dads · not-so-veiled threats · Santa Cruz

Lean, Green & Mean

June 28th, 2011 · 44 Comments

“I was the third child,” says Kathy in Colorado, “so my mom didn’t have time to take nearly as many notes about my development as she did for my brother and sister.”

And speaking of developmental milestones…Kathy’s older sister was just 42 years old when she finally fessed up to adding this note of her own to one of the few non-blank pages of Kathy’s baby book.

walking on her own 9/19 (12 1/2 mo.) so what I can walk on my own too!

related: S is for Sibling Rivalry

Tags: kids · siblings

Happy Father’s Day from Passiveaggressivenotes.com!

June 17th, 2011 · 19 Comments

While babysitting her sister’s kids, Allison in Pennsylvania found the card her nieces made for Father’s Day. (Knowing her brother-in-law, she says, “I can understand why they only love him sometimes.”)

Dad We love you sometimes. Tay + Amber + Kelsey

related: “Dear Dad, I hate you less than I hate Mom.”

Tags: kids · Moms & Dads

Dear parents: this is what you WON’T be hearing from your newly minted college grads

May 22nd, 2011 · 39 Comments

(After all, once they’ve moved back home into their old bedrooms, they can just raid your liquor cabinet and sneak bills from your wallet, just like old times!)

Meanwhile, this note/social critique was spotted by James in downtown Iowa City, “amid dozens of bars and thousands of over-privileged young suburbanites.”

Dear dad, please stop sending me your money; I'll just use it to buy booze.

If, however, your entrepreneurial kiddos do decide to strike out their own, you might want to keep tabs on the Sudafed in the medicine cabinet. (Especially if “on their own” means “the room above the garage.”)

I don't have a meth lab (Never ever) LEAVE ME ALONE

related: Your daughter is a substance abuser and a PLAYER!

Tags: art · beer · college life · drugs · graffiti · Iowa · Moms & Dads · money