PassiveAggressiveNotes.com » fed-up librarian http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:51:33 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Please don’t treat the stapler like you treat your farm animals http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/11/01/stapler-abuse/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/11/01/stapler-abuse/#comments Wed, 02 Nov 2011 00:18:18 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=19712 This brilliantly understated little note comes to us from a campus library at the University of Auckland, where submitter Louise says the staplers do seem to get jammed into disrepair on a fairly regular basis.

This stapler is now in perfect mechanical condition. It works just fine. Please do not abuse the stapler. Remember: This is just an ordinary stapler, not a rocket powered attaching device. It will NOT staple together half a ream of paper. Unlike a plowing mule, hitting it really hard will not make the stapler work harder to accomplish your goal.

(I have to admit that I kinda love this one. Hat tip to you, librarian!)

related: (Insert Office Space reference here)

extra credit: A rocket-powered detaching device

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/11/01/stapler-abuse/feed/ 51 Shushing the shusher http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/07/21/shushed-librarian/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/07/21/shushed-librarian/#comments Thu, 21 Jul 2011 14:46:02 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=18938 Anna in Minneapolis (“librarian in peach sweater”) recently received this anonymous note from a disgruntled library patron. “Apparently, I was talking too loudly to one of our elderly customers on the phone,” she says. “So much for Minnesota nice!”

Whatever happened to speaking QUIETLY in a library? librarian in peach sweater.

related: You seem like really nice people. Really.

extra credit: Just know that I have a whole bag of shhh! with your name on it [youtube]

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/07/21/shushed-librarian/feed/ 109 I’m sorry if this is rude, but…your mere presence offends my delicate sensibilities. http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/10/im-sorry-if-this-is-rude-but-your-mere-presence-offends-my-delicate-sensibilities/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/10/im-sorry-if-this-is-rude-but-your-mere-presence-offends-my-delicate-sensibilities/#comments Wed, 11 Aug 2010 02:18:22 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=16304 Our submitter in Orange County, California came across this note on a table at the local public library while studying for the Bar Exam. “I figured the added noises would simulate the noises during the actual test,” our submitter says. “Apparently the noise isn’t the only thing that bugs some of the other patrons.” (What’s really bugging me about this note: WHAT IS UNDER THAT WHITE-OUT STRIP ON THE FIRST LINE?)

I'm sorry if this is rude. But...You smell. And you've been scratching your body constantly. Please go take a shower when you get home. I'm studying for an important exam and your lack of hygiene is affecting my concentration.

Meanwhile, Daryl in Vancouver, B.C. spotted this pinned to the bulletin board at his gym. I don’t know if this means I’m going soft, but the thought of creepy bicycle-shorts guy walking up to the bulletin board and reading this while all of the other little kick-boxing vixens look on actually makes me feel sorry for the guy.  The note’s amusing, I guess, but it also seems a little…below-the-belt, no?

Bicycle shorts are an incredible invention. For the avid cyclist, the form-fitting design allows for freedom of movement temperature control and comfort. But when worn to a boxing class, especially in conjunction with a baby blue tank top, they can pose several dangers both to the wearer and those around him. Beyond the obvious aesthetic perils bicycle shorts can create by highlighting abnormally small genitalia, these types of shorts, when worn with a sky blue wife beater, create unease and discomfort among female classmates. This is mostly due to the fact that in 1928 the official uniform of sexual predators was declared to be black bicycle shorts paired with a powder blue tank top. Thankfully, in 1929, boxing shorts were invented, thereby eliminating any chance of someone showing up to a boxing class dressed as a convicted rapist.

related: You seem like really nice people, but…

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/08/10/im-sorry-if-this-is-rude-but-your-mere-presence-offends-my-delicate-sensibilities/feed/ 85 And seriously, FYI you guys http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/04/05/and-seriously-fyi-you-guys/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/04/05/and-seriously-fyi-you-guys/#comments Mon, 05 Apr 2010 05:01:44 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=13916 This note was spotted by Sara at the downtown Alamo Cinema Drafthouse in Austin, seemingly written by an employee channeling Amy Poehler’s character in Wet Hot American Summer.

Hey guys, listen up! There is [sic] way too many memos being posted around here lately, irregardless of what they may say. Let's all do our part to minimize clutter on the wall. Seriously, no biggie, just you know...

Seriously guys, amirite?!?

related: Now finish up them taters, I’m gonna go fondle my sweaters

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2010/04/05/and-seriously-fyi-you-guys/feed/ 96 The case for single-sex toilets http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/03/17/the-case-for-single-sex-toilets/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/03/17/the-case-for-single-sex-toilets/#comments Tue, 17 Mar 2009 21:31:28 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=10597 “In the staff area of our library, there is a single-stall, co-ed bathroom,” says our anonymous submitter in Berkeley, California. Everyone got along okay, more or less, until recently, when one of the library’s male employees “left quite a mess behind.” A female coworker responded with the note below.

Turn around. Did everything flush? Did you wipe the seat and put it back down? Have some common courtesy. We don't want to know your business. Thanks

And then, well, the lines were drawn.

Please DO NOT flush any feminine products in the toilet!

Please also avoid flushing the following Masculine Products in the toilet: Electric razors, Sporting equipment, T.V. remotes, Guns, Excessive Aggression

related: dude kinda has a point

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2009/03/17/the-case-for-single-sex-toilets/feed/ 139 Grimace and the fry kids http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/04/23/grimace-and-the-fry-kids/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/04/23/grimace-and-the-fry-kids/#comments Wed, 23 Apr 2008 16:39:52 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/?p=635 The school in Los Angeles where Anna works is under renovation, so a lot of the kids cut through the library on their way to and from the cafeteria. Recently, one of these fine young scholars spilled an entire basket of fries…and kept walking. One of Anna’s coworkers picked them up, but he missed one. another coworker posted this note.

Please note the offending French fry on the carpet in the library. Situations like this, people, are why we make you go around the library when you have food or drink.

The amazing thing, Anna says, is that the sign actually worked. “The student came in, took responsibility and even apologized.” Happy meals all around!

related: No sarcasm left behind
extra credit: The real Grimace [youtube]

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/04/23/grimace-and-the-fry-kids/feed/ 124 Volenti non fit injuria http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/11/01/volenti-non-fit-injuria/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/11/01/volenti-non-fit-injuria/#comments Thu, 01 Nov 2007 16:36:08 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/11/01/volenti-non-fit-injuria/ Garvey is a 3L at a “relatively cheap” state law school in New York City, where he says “there’s a perpetual joke that it’s still a bargain, even with all its many, many problems.” Garvey found this note attached to one of the ancient computers in the school’s less than state-of-the-art law library. (I mean really, Internet Explorer? puhleez.)

volenti non fit injuria

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/11/01/volenti-non-fit-injuria/feed/ 89 She slipped the registrar 30 pieces of silver http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/14/she-slipped-the-registrar-30-pieces-of-silver/ http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/14/she-slipped-the-registrar-30-pieces-of-silver/#comments Fri, 14 Sep 2007 08:03:16 +0000 Kerry http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/14/she-slipped-the-registrar-30-pieces-of-silver/ This note, from the science library of Washington & Lee University in Lexington, Virginia, has a bit of a backstory.

Explains our anonymous submitter: “Here, you can reserve a carrel for the entire school year, with two students to a carrel. Our honor system is such that people leave their books and belongings at their carrel basically all the time.” Our submitter caught sight of this little exchange and sneakily made a photocopy to share with us. (Oh, and FYI: “A&P,” our submitter says, refers to Anatomy and Physiology — a popular course that generally only seniors get into.)

To the Judas who is sharing my carrol [sic], As if it were not enough that you betrayed me & took the A&P class that I could not get in; You have also decided to flaunt the forementioned [sic] book on my carrol [sic]. You may be heartless. Heart, Your carrol (sp?) mate!

]]> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/09/14/she-slipped-the-registrar-30-pieces-of-silver/feed/ 180