Entries Tagged as 'food'

Yeah, I got fired…but that Hot Pocket sure was worth it.

May 30th, 2007 · 14 Comments

This exercise in redundancy is brought to us by Erika in Los Angeles. It’s like the note-writer couldn’t decide which tactic would be most effective and just opted for all of the above.

REMEMBER!

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · excessive underlining · food · guilt trip · high on highlighter · Los Angeles · not-so-veiled threats · office · office fridge · pleasantries as afterthought · spelling and grammar police · stealing

You left evidence.

May 28th, 2007 · 19 Comments

Don’t be fooled by the smiley: this is the kind of note that really throws you off balance. (It’s been more than a month since she received this note, and Kiki from Boston says she’s still shaking in her boots a little.)

Hey You! Look — I know you ate some of my Smart Balance. You left evidence. Stealing is rude! Next time — ask. I'm ok with sharing y'know. :) Amy

related: I Can’t Believe It’s Not (My) Butter

Tags: Boston · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · office · office fridge · smiley · stealing

No smelly foods

May 21st, 2007 · 16 Comments

It started with “no smelly foods,” says Kathleen, and escalated from there.

related: NO FISH in the microwave!

Tags: excessive underlining · food · group bitchfest · microwave · odor · office · smartass

I spit in mine

May 20th, 2007 · 3 Comments

Spotted on the office fridge by Sam, who also brings us this little gem — the most precise vending-machine operating instructions ever written.

PLEASE STOP STEALING MY FOOD! (I spit in mine! Enjoy!) And I want my nice Tupperware back!!!

related: Spit & Vinegar

Tags: exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · New York · office fridge · spitting · stealing

That’d be GREAT

May 18th, 2007 · 11 Comments

In evidence here, a key element of the passive-aggressive lexicon —and one of the many elevated to catchphrase status by Mike Judge.

This example comes from Peter (no, not that Peter), who has since escaped roommate living but offers these words of wisdom for those of us who haven’t: “Never trust anyone who uses post-it notes at home.”

Peter — I'm not too happy with your inability to provide me with some cookies. If we could fix this situation, that'd be great. Thanks, Jon

related: Too many

Tags: food · roommates · royal we

Nobody wants your disgusting tuna sandwich, but we’ll fondle it out of spite

May 17th, 2007 · 2 Comments

From Giovanni: a classic example of the “office fridge” sub-genre.

Please DO NOT TOUCH or eat. Thanks.

Tags: excessive underlining · food · office · office fridge · pleasantries as afterthought · touching

“Too many”

May 12th, 2007 · 29 Comments

This card came with a box of homemade mandelbrot from my very own passive-aggressive Jewish grandmother.

Wishing you love, joy and a good day! Enjoy but don't eat too many!!

Tags: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · Grandma · hey fatty