Entries Tagged as 'food'
When it comes to comment cards and suggestion boxes, it’s not necessarily hard to get the last word. But as Maggie noticed while leaving a dining hall at the University of Denver, it takes a skilled passive-aggressive to turn a totally neutral, boilerplate response into an obvious “up yours” without so much as an exclamation point.
related: The Great Egg Salad Ban of ’08 at the Conde Nast cafeteria
extra credit: College Cafeterias Get Bad Grades from the Health Dept. [nytimes.com]
Tags: "helpful" advice · college life · Denver · food · thanks (but not really)
“The crayon note showed up about two months before the response,” says Monica at Goucher College, “but both have been a source of great entertainment.”
related: Comrades, take notice!
extra credit: A lesson from Barney! **********
Tags: a little patronizing · Baltimore · college life · food · questionable logic · rebuttals · sharing is caring · stealing
Many months ago, one of our submitter’s coworkers decided to fortify the entire office freezer with family-sized bricks of monosodium glutamate.
(Was there an amazing “buy 20, get one free” special at Wal-Mart? Is someone filming a processed-foods version of Super Size Me? Or just stocking up for the End Times?) Whatever the reason, this person made very clear (via post-it note) that these frozen delights were not for general consumption, thanks.
Finally, after months had gone by with no obvious signs of attrition on the Banquet line, another coworker decided to add a defiant note of protest (which in turn spurred a third note, from the office smartass.) Sadly, the real question (FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS FROZEN — WHY????) remains unanswered.
related: Please remove the rabbit carcasses from this freezer
Tags: Colorado · food · office fridge · rebuttals · stealing
Tags: eww · not-so-veiled threats · shit · stealing · TMI · yogurt
At a B&B by the Norfolk coast, our submitter Liz was amused by this (possibly serious, possibly not?) guestbook comment — one I hope the proprietors are able work into their next ex-con advertising campaign.
Meanwhile, Amie and Tim spotted this guestbook note while checking out from their hotel in Iceland. “We don’t know who Linda is or what she did, but…wow.” (Perhaps she could seek some support from Except Graham or Especially Deborah?)
related: But you’re too nice not to be a Christian!
Tags: "customer service" · backhanded compliment · food
Christian and John in Manchester, U.K. spotted this sign in the library of Manchester Metropolitan University…where the fridge thieves must be really, really ruthless (or the librarians very, very dotty).
This particular library, says John, “is where the vast majority of the university’s science and law students go. I have to wonder what sort of a university I go to if prospective engineers, biologists, chemists, physicists and lawyers have to be specifically asked not to put food in the toilet brush holders.”
Adds Christian: “I imagine a further note reading: ‘Please Do Not Poop On The Ceiling.’”
Meanwhile, in Cambridge…further evidence of U.K. university students’ curious predilection for eating while toileting.
related: Pizza box as air freshener?
Tags: bathroom · Cambridge · college life · food · Manchester · U.K. · WTF?
Matt, a law student in Boston, surmises that this note posted in the school’s student lounge was written by non-native English speaker — “the other possibility being that the stress of exams has eaten away at his ability to write coherently.” But what’s curious about this note isn’t the spelling and grammar so much as the the variety and specificity of immediate punishments that are promised within.
“For example,” asks Matt: “Will the food choke the perpetrator, or will Frank be the choker? How will the burns be administered to the sleeper?” And so on. ”In any case,” he adds, “at least the various threatened deaths won’t be drawn out. (Also, to the best of my knowledge, there is no ‘video record’ of the refrigerator.)”
related: Testosterone-fueled wackjobs make the dardnest threats!
Tags: Boston · Clearly a non-native English speaker · die bitch die · food · lawyers & law students · not-so-veiled threats · p.s.
Emma says this note appeared in her dorm at the University of Chicago shortly before the Thanksgiving holiday. “Our kitchen has a sign on the fridge that says: ‘If you leave your food unlabeled, it’s fair game. Label your food.’ I assume this girl did not label her food.” (Because who would be cruel enough to steal such a traditional Thanksgiving delicacy from an old lady?)
Another dorm resident sent in a shot of the anonymous response added later.
related: Thanksgiving pride & passive-aggression
Tags: college life · food · guilt trip · irregular capitalization · rebuttals · stealing · Thanksgiving
Taylor in Tulsa, Oklahoma works — well, worked — at the front desk of a hotel. “When I started this job,” he says, “we were told we could eat in the back office so that if it got too busy we could stop our lunch and help out, but apparently my offensive burrito was over the top.” Taylor swears the dirty dishes weren’t his, but he was laid off anyway — after which, he adds, “the note was promptly removed.”
(“Outback,” by the way, refers to the employee dining area, not the steakhouse known for its “delicious” bread.)
Meanwhile, at a small office in Canada, our submitter says one of the company’s directors has a similar habit of sending out a pedantic “just FYI”-type memo to the entire staff each time she has run-in with another co-worker. (And yes, our submitter says, they’re always in Comic Sans.)
related: Complimentary body spray for all employees!
Tags: "helpful" advice · a little patronizing · all-staff e-mail · Comic Sans Alert · dishes · fired · food · hygiene · memo · message to all intended for one · odor · office cop · Ontario · Tulsa
If you needed another reason to be happy you don’t live in Utah, Justin brings us this explosion of bad ideas from a Provo office park.
(I’m going with “Team None-of-the-Above” for this one.)
related: The bathroom walls are NOT soundproof.
extra credit: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Pizza Air Freshener
Tags: bathroom · guilt trip · odor · pizza · Provo · questionable logic · rebuttals · shit · that's disgusting · that's unhealthy · toilet · Utah · WTF?