Entries Tagged as 'fuck fuckity fuck fuck'

The ripped-off tabs are what get me

March 18th, 2009 · 154 Comments

Veronica spotted this gloriously expressive exercise in futility stapled to a telephone pole near her home in San Francisco. I totally forgive the double p in “apartment,” because dude,  I know exactly how you feel.

Also, the idea of someone ripping off one of those tabs and going, “Why yes, I will fuck myself!” is just really tickling me right now.

FUCK YOU You stole our laptops from our appartment [sic], but I'm sure you needed them all, right? The pillow case you took them in, keep it. But the laptops, come on. What a fucking jerk.

related: untitled (broken glass)

Tags: California · CAPS LOCK · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · San Francisco · stealing

Merry Christmas, you junkie scumbag lowlife

December 26th, 2008 · 68 Comments

Libby from Sydney, Australia found this note taped to the wall of the IGA supermarket in Newtown, Sydney. “Feeling sympathetic though somewhat amused, I took a photo of it — I didn’t really think it would be fair to take it with me.” (That is, of course, more than can be said for a certain junkie scumbag lowlife.)

If it was you that stole the wheel off my bicycle when it was locked here, about 11, on Christmas fucking eve, rest assured that I look forward to hunting you down and separating your head from your body, you junkie scumbug lowlife

related: an inconvenient truth

Tags: Australia · bicycle · Christmas · die bitch die · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · not-so-veiled threats · stealing · Sydney

“Swiffer gives cleaning a whole new meaning”

May 21st, 2008 · 111 Comments

Writes Bibs in Tacoma, Washington: “My sophomore year in college, I was placed in a campus house with six other girls I didn’t know.  To say the least, we did not really get along, but we made a chore chart so we would all at least have a semi-clean house to live in.” At least, that was the idea.

Things broke down when one of the housemates, Cindy, was confronted with the reality of seven girls sharing one bathroom. After this little display, Bibs says, the chore wheel pretty much went to hell.

swiffer gives cleaning a whole new meaning

related: Landmine in my bloodline

Tags: cleaning · college life · excessive underlining · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · inappropriate word EMPHASIS · not cool · roommates · spelling and grammar police · Tacoma · to/too · visual aids

Some dating advice

May 16th, 2008 · 156 Comments

Here, a break-up note too long for a text message…though that might have a been more (fucking) appropriate.

If you're going to have naked pics of your ex on your phone, you might not want to make them your background pic + LEAVE YOUR PHONE OPEN WHILE YOU SHOWER! I am going for a walk + you better be the FUCK out of my apt by the time I get back. You're a fucking DOUCHE -- SHE'S FUCKING FAT! WTF?

related: you oughta know

Tags: "helpful" advice · breakup · Cleveland · ex drama · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · more aggressive than passive

Roommate fumes; Unilever marketing execs rejoice

February 3rd, 2008 · 66 Comments

Curse as much as you want, dude: you’re still bitching about body wash. (Personally, that’s what I’d call a gamekiller.)

Whoever keeps using my fucking shower gel and drinking my fucking beer needs to fucking replace them!!! -Tom

related: I swear this isn’t some sort of stealth viral marketing campaign

Tags: beer · Brooklyn · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · New York · roommates · stealing · whiteboard

I think it’s going to be a long long time

August 20th, 2007 · 194 Comments

Today’s tasteless gross-out is brought to us by Christina in Irvine, California. (My apologies in advance.)

Here's my new decree: Everyone with rocket pubes has to put a fucking hairnet over their balls before entering the showers/bathrooms in the dorms. I was in the shower today, lathering, rinsing, a little repeating — and I look over at the plastic shower curtain. To my fucking amazement there is a pube at about shoulder level.

Tags: all clogged up · bathroom · California · college life · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · group bitchfest · hair · Irvine · most popular notes of 2007 · shower · that's disgusting