“My mother-in-law is a devout Catholic,” our submitter says, “but my husband and sister-in-law do not hold the same beliefs” — much to the chagrin of their ever-guilt-tripping Mom. “We received this St. Patrick’s Day card addressed to my sister-in-law c/o my husband…even though she has her daughter’s address.”

related: theo(logical) fallacy

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At least a half-dozen submitters (including Spencer, Kelsae, and Mark) would pick this one — from a pizzeria in Provo, Utah.
“For those who don’t know, “lower kingdoms” comes from Mormon theology, where they believe that people are sorted out into three kingdoms instead of the traditional heaven and hell option,” Kelsae says.
Adds Spencer: “There’s a [...]

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Joel in Glendale, California was raised in a religious Christian family, and apparently someone let it slip to his grandmother (bless her heart!) that he’s — gasp!— an atheist. Aaaaand…let the backhanded compliments begin!

Dear Joel, I have heard that you say you’re an athesis [sic]. I don’t believe that because you have so many Christian qualities. [...]

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Writes Sara in Cardiff, Wales: “Around this time last year, I noticed that the Jesus had been stolen from this city centre church’s Nativity scene. The church is surrounded by pubs and, as it can get quite messy in Cardiff on the weekend, it’s no surprise Jesus went AWOL. About a week later, the note [...]

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At college, more often than not, your sex life is everybody’s business. But don’t worry…it’s for your own good! For example, the writer of this first note (as spotted by Ashley at Missouri State) displays a heartwarming concern for her dorm-mate’s physical safety.

And as Vic and his friends at Arizona State’s Barrett Honors College discovered, [...]

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As this note from Columbus, Ohio demonstrates, ’tis the season to be hilariously self-righteous!

related: All I want for Christmas
extra credit: Baby Jesus Theft [Wikipedia]
Roundup of stolen Baby Jesus reports [Wonkette]
Baby Jesus found! [FOUND Magazine]

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Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: “We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. She took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.”

related: my condolences on your birthday

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Chris in Valdosta, Georgia came home last Halloween Eve to find this friendly reminder taped to every mailbox in his quiet little cul-de-sac. (“It’s a little worse for wear,” Chris explains, “because I ripped it off and stomped it on a few times before scanning it.”)

The underlying message, interestingly enough, actually isn’t all that different [...]

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This good-humored e-mail was send out to the entire staff of an elementary school…IN HELL!
(click the image below to enlarge)

related: What would Jesus do for a Klondike bar?

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Jen in Tallahassee, Florida found this posted on the fridge in her synagogue’s kitchen. “We’ve tried many things to prevent missing food from this refrigerator,” Jen says. “we’ve even installed a lock so that only certain people with keys can get into the refrigerator…and yet, the problem continues.”

related: the PANtheistic approach

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When dealing with anonymous strangers, there’s no point in playing coy about your hopes and dreams. Tell us, kids, what do you REALLY want?

related: i hope your cat chokes

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Another sign of the times: Nick in Tampa, Florida says the sodas in his small office used to be free, but now they cost 50 cents. And yet, Nick says, “when they’re left out unguarded and unsecured, naturally, people steal them.” 
Eventually, one coworker thought instilling the fear of god would make for a good theft-deterrent…which [...]

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Our submitter from Honolulu lives with two roommates…in a house that belongs to one of those roommate’s parents. (Mayday! Mayday!)
One day, apparently, mother dearest decided to come over for an unannounced visit. Surprise!

(click to enlarge)
related: I can has guilt trip?

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This is one of those notes I’ve spent far too long puzzling over. The frustratingly random capitalization, the misuse of/missing punctuation, the center justification, and of course, THE BOX. WHY THE BOX?

Sir/ma’am, I will gladly supply you with as many Baby Ruths as you can stuff down your gullet if you can reconstruct the thought [...]

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Sydney spotted this bizarrely self-satisfied bit of scripture in a friend’s downtown Berkeley apartment building.
Says Sydney: “I personally think the Bible verse adds a nice touch of guilt, but it’s the emoticon smileys that really put the whole thing over the top for me.”

(Also…what exactly has the note-writer been doing while holding those keys ransom [...]

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Joanna from San Diego spotted this beauty in the public kitchen at her grandparents’ retirement home in Chattanooga, Tennessee.  Writes Joanna: “I love it because it combines passive-aggressiveness with religious sanctimony. Delicious!”

related: no, He uses vaseline

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anthony in salt lake city, utah was a little perplexed when the new lady sharing his cubicle put this little number up. odder still, he says, “is the fact that this particular wall was originally my half — she took everything i had on that end and moved it to the other side.”
says anthony: “apparently [...]

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earlier this year, emma in california was sharing a kitchen with three other girls. one day, out of the blue, one of her roommates posted this note. (warning: prepare to reexamine any preconceptions you may have about mormons, straight-edgers, and college-aged women in general.)

by the next morning, emma says, the note was promptly defaced, but [...]

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i think we’ve received some of your mail by mistake. just wanted to pass these along! xoxo, PAN

related: arrivederci, asshole

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“the screen door to our block of flats is broken,” says our anonymous submitter in australia, “which has provoked some rather unique responses from my fellow residents.”

related: but who’s counting?

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at yale divinity school, the daily chapel service is followed by a coffee hour. apparently, says sara in new haven, “some who skip chapel were helping themselves to the goodies before the intended time. looks like the ‘keeper of the snacks’ has something to say about this.”

meanwhile, john in sudbury, mass. spotted this humble plea [...]

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jasy from laurel, maryland spotted this beauty while driving down the jersey turnpike.
“i’m dying to know just how blasphemous denise is to deserve the sign,” jasy says, “but is it really that surprising that the antichrist would claim jersey as home base?”

related: no, He uses vaseline
extra credit: “hey, look our toll plaza over” [nytimes.com]

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1. prey on their insecurities.

2. get jesus involved.

3. oh, screw it.

related: roommate fumes; unilever marketing execs rejoice

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A certain Facebook friend of our anonymous submitter seems to have been going through a rough couple of weeks. but, hey, at least she seems to be confronting her issues!

(Confidential to Facebook friend: I’m no shrink, but I have a feeling this strategy might be more effective if the method of confrontation was something [...]

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i really thought it couldn’t get more egregious than this clip-art catastrophe from a church in boston (left), which made this one (right) look downright tasteful in comparison.

but then, at a friend’s recent wedding, carey in northern virginia spotted this note — complete with that same punchy little yellow smiley — on several [...]

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