writes ben in snohomish, washington: “we visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. she took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.”

related: my condolences on your birthday

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our anonymous submitter from chicago says she and her four siblings recently received this somewhat cryptic e-mail from dear old dad. explains a: “the initials refer to our names (and spouses’ names, where applicable). dad lives in west bloomfield. i’m pretty sure it means he wants us to visit?”

related: love, dad

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this good-humored e-mail was send out to the entire staff of an elementary school…IN HELL!
(click the image below to enlarge)

related: what would jesus do for a klondike bar?

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daniel is montreal says his dear grandmother sent him this card in the mail for his birthday. the front of the card (which didn’t scan very well) says: it is not what is visible on the surface but what is deep inside that sustains us.
well, says daniel, “that and guilt.”

related: dear grandma — thanks, i [...]

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writes marni in brooklyn: “we tried this restaurant back when they first opened. the food was pretty bad, it took forever to arrive, and i believe our waitress quit or was fired (either way, there was some yelling) during our meal. many gimmicks involving morning coffee were attempted, but the signage made the food look [...]

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seriously, how much do you want to _____ this guy in the _____ right now?  (you fill in the blank)

next year, i think this guy and this girl should collaborate on a gigantic fucking birthday pity party.
related: you know, i’m getting input here that is relatively hostile
extra credit: facebook is for narcissists

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our submitter from honolulu lives with two roommates…in a house that belongs to one of those roommate’s parents. (mayday! mayday!)
one day, apparently, mother dearest decided to come over for an unannounced visit. surprise!

(click to enlarge)
related: i can has guilt trip?

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shortly after the birth of her new nephew (a.k.a “gee-gee-boo”, liz in waltham, mass. received this note (channeling grandmothers everywhere) from the precocious 7-year-old daughter of her other sister. writes liz: “i love that she is simultaneously trying to guilt trip me into having a kid while not-so-subtly hinting that baby g should move up [...]

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there’s a guilt trip…

and then there’s a guilt trip.

related: your hamster died? well, i can top that.

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rachel in victoria, b.c. found this somewhat puzzling bit of anthropomorphism (stairs have feelings? really?) posted in the elevator of her residence building.  adds rachel: “my favourite part is ‘your bum will love it.’ no better way to guilt trip people into ’saving energy’ than by insinuating that they’re fat!”

related: hey, fatty

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my grandma cookie is 85 today! won’t you join me in wishing her love, joy and a good day?

and please, she’s got early bird reservations at the hibachi restaurant at 6 p.m. (florida time, natch), so step on it, won’t cha?
related: an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate
extra credit: the blue mountain [...]

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amy spotted this attached to a mailbox in monroe, north carolina. writes amy:  “i have no idea which flower it was (there were many that were still left on the porch), but i was impressed by the effort the victim took with this note — it was written on poster board and left up for [...]

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jennifer in echo park admits that she stole this note under the cover of night, (she found it stuck with silver electrical tape to the back of a battered electrician’s work truck) BUT, she contends, ” i would never ever steal someone’s leather pants (out of their truck). i am not a monster.”

meanwhile, claudia’s friend [...]

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shirley in canada says one of her coworkers sent this e-mail to the entire building — several hundred people in all — after what we can only assume was an unsuccessful half-day cooling-off period. (or perhaps just several hours spent choosing the most whimsically enraged font/color combination.)

meanwhile, this all-staff e-mail was sent to over 400 [...]

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sarah from san fran was taking a little stroll in berkeley, california last december when she saw a house that clearly belonged to the “more is more” school of holiday decorating.
you know the type: “giant candy canes, red bows, lights, even one of those life-sized plastic snow globes that blows confetti snow all around inside [...]

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“as a college student used to her freedom, i’m sometimes gone for days at a time when i’m home for the summer,” explains jesse from gurnee, illinois, admitting that during this time, her betta fish, freddie mercury, tends to go unfed.
“my 14-year old-sister has shown him mercy a a few times,” jesse says, and admirably, [...]

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“my dear, sweet grandmother lived a long, full life and passed away recently at the age of 88,” writes mark in denton, texas, but he still has the valentine his “memaw” sent him back in 2005 during his freshman year of college.
before the cockles of your heart get too warmed, however, take note: mark says, [...]

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at yale divinity school, the daily chapel service is followed by a coffee hour. apparently, says sara in new haven, “some who skip chapel were helping themselves to the goodies before the intended time. looks like the ‘keeper of the snacks’ has something to say about this.”

meanwhile, john in sudbury, mass. spotted this humble plea [...]

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kendall was waiting for her peach perfection at the jamba juice in elmhurst, illinois when she spotted this note on the napkin-holder. writes kendall: “i guess it’s their passive-aggressive way of saying, ‘take fewer napkins, a**hole!’”

UPDATE 10/12/09: a copycat is on the loose in milwaukee, wisconsin! (as spotted by paul in nebraska)

a tip for would-be [...]

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spotted by anna on the wall of an apartment complex in phoenix…

meanwhile, in ottawa…it’s comforting to know that even when mom isn’t there to do your laundry, she can still help you guilt-trip your neighbors.

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