Entries Tagged as 'guilt trip'

My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Parents

April 14th, 2010 · 127 Comments

When I was a kid, my mother liked to say that I had a “flair for the dramatic.” Just ask her about the My Little Pony sewing machine she promised — I mean crossed her heart and hoped to die promised — that I could have when I turned six. (I’m still waiting.)

If only my parents had sent my temper-tantrum-throwing little bratty self to time-out armed with pencil and paper! Then we might have precious mementos like this one, written by the youngest daughter of our anonymous submitter from Pennsylvania. After being sent to her room for bad behavior, darling daughter — “a chronic notewriter” — slipped this under the door for her parents to discover.

Dear Mom and Dad don't bother to give me dinner im [sic] not that hungry - From The saddest person in the world

(The crossed-out “Love” is what kills me.) And of course, it’s not just little girls who resort to such melodrama.

As Sara in Phoenix explains, ”My husband and I were outside one evening, deaf to the ‘screams’ of my 9-year-old son, Eliot. Apparently, he was in his room and bumped his fish tank, causing a small amount of water to slosh out, and he panicked. When we came back inside, we found the above note shoved under our bedroom door. Upon examination of said fish tank, we could find zero evidence of leak-springing…but then, we were also laughing pretty hard at the indignant note — especially its closing and postscript.”

Dear Mommy & Jon  You almost cost the life of my bob my fish. It sprung a leak, next time if you here me screaming 'HELP MY FISH TANK SPRUNG A LEAK, PLEASE HELP ME Come Help Me' COME HELP worringly, eliot P.S. It was temporary

Adds Sara: “P.S. Bob is fine.”

related: The joys of motherhood

Tags: guilt trip · kids · martyr complex · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · p.s.

St. Patrick…the patron saint of Irish-Catholic guilt?

March 17th, 2010 · 72 Comments

“My mother-in-law is a devout Catholic,” our submitter says, “but my husband and sister-in-law do not hold the same beliefs” — much to the chagrin of their ever-guilt-tripping Mom. “We received this St. Patrick’s Day card addressed to my sister-in-law c/o my husband…even though she has her daughter’s address.”

Happy St Patty's Day! For my daughter who doesn't believe in anything anymore! Blessings of St. Patrick to you! Love and Peace and Joy, Your Mother! XOXO

related: theo(logical) fallacy

Tags: God · guilt trip · holiday spirit · Moms & Dads · signed with love · xoxo

And you wonder why we don’t visit more often…

March 8th, 2010 · 63 Comments

Grandmothers live for thank you notes — receiving them, writing them, not-so-subtly inquiring whether one might be forthcoming.

Jennifer in Michigan received this gracious note of thanks after a Christmas visit to her Grandma. Cue the violins, please…

C & J - Thank you so much for the jam and fattening nuts - Which I like - Always nice to see you ONCE A YEAR. My gosh C is still so handsome - Guess we don't see you enough to have anything to visit about.   Love Always Your Grandma

(If you can’t read Grandma cursive, just mouse over the note for a transcription.)

related: Really, Mom, you shouldn’t have

Tags: Christmas · family · Grandma · guilt trip · Michigan · thanks (but not really)

Just in case you haven’t gotten your daily fix of working-mom guilt…

January 28th, 2010 · 218 Comments

“During the past few weeks, our  preschool-aged son has been trying to play games that are too violent for his classmates,” Juli says. “We’ve been trying to work on the problem with the teacher, but each morning’s drop-off has become a guilt and angst-filled time for me, in part because I can tell the teacher is trying to be nice but is so obviously annoyed by my child that I can’t control!”

(No need for siding with “team preschool teacher” or “team mom,” here — this kind of relationship is just emotionally fraught no matter how you slice it.)

Eric and his friends had fun playing zookeeper outside today!

And of course, the guilt doesn’t stop there. Jennifer in St. Cloud, Minnesota, found this note in her son’s lunchbox (along with most of a ham sandwich).

The Montessori Method of Passive-Aggression

related: This is all about the childern.

Tags: guilt trip · kids · Moms & Dads · smiley

Starve on!

January 27th, 2010 · 139 Comments

Explains our submitter in New York: “This note is the result of a less-than-enthusiastic holiday food drive. Our office is a gray, lifeless place — what can one expect?”

(I don’t know…maybe some munchkins now and then?)

We would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who participated in the 2009 Food Drive.  We collected 75 pounds less than the 100 pounds of food required for pick up but I am sure that it will be greatly appreciated by those affected by homelessness, job losses and the elderly. There are three items which are not acceptable donation items.  They have been placed on the table.  Please check if they are from your donation and retrieve them.

related: But what about Hawaiian Shirt Day?

Tags: all-staff e-mail · guilt trip · office · thanks (but not really)

An e-mail from my arteries

January 19th, 2010 · 66 Comments

Filching someone’s McDonald’s coupons…the “aggressive” flipside of the passive-aggressive offering of coupons for fitness DVDs?

“The person who sent this e-mail is actually a great and very well-liked individual at my place of work,” our submitter says. (Assuming, I guess, that one doesn’t come between him and his Egg McMuffins.)

I really have you have a great day...

related: sympathy for the devil

extra credit: Shaking things up at Dairy Queen

Tags: all-staff e-mail · Canada · ellipses-crazed · guilt trip · sarcasm · spelling and grammar police · stealing · thanks (but not really)

A bitter pill to swallow

December 17th, 2009 · 123 Comments

“To the best of our knowledge,” writes our submitter from Raleigh, North Carolina, “the bottle in question is one of those $0.79 plastic Deer Park water bottles.” You know, the special kind carried in just about every gas station, 7-11, and grocery store in the state.

To the one who tossed my bottles while I was on vacation - Shame on You! The small bottle I used to dissolve my medical pills after lunch. Today I could not take them because my bottle was gone.

Moral of the story? Just another example of how taking it upon yourself to clean out the ol’ office fridge can OMG KILL PEOPLE.

related: Your BBQ = 9/11

Tags: cry me a freaking river · guilt trip · North Carolina · office fridge

Deny a man his web comics? How dare you.

December 3rd, 2009 · 218 Comments

Heather in Indianapolis is the kind of gal who helps out a pal who’s down on his luck. So when her marginally employed friend needed a place to crash while he got back on his feet, she let Greg live in her house and help himself to her food and other belongings, like her laptop, “pretty much rent-free,” for three months.

One day, after several hours spent trying to get rid of all the spyware on her computer  — thanks to all the porn sites she found in the browser history — she turned on parental controls. (A lil’ passive-aggressive? Maybe.) Then, when she forgot to log off one day, Greg removed them.

When Heather figured this out (after being bombarded by spyware once again) she added the parental controls back. And Greg — instead of saying something like, “Hey, did you realize those settings block stuff like Google and Careerbuilder?” — left her this charming note.

“According to this note,” Heather says, “in addition to all the horrible things I’ve done such as give him a place to live, let him eat my food, give him breaks on rent for months at a time and put up with his laziness, carelessness and filth, I have also DENIED HIM A SOCIAL LIFE! OMG!”

Deny a man his web comics? How dare you.

UPDATE: The back of the note!

In other words, you suck, and i should probably move out anyway!

Shoshana, it looks like you have some competition.

related: WoW, indeed.

Tags: frenemies · guilt trip · Indianapolis · martyr complex · moving/not moving · not cool · p.s. · roommates

Which is more despicable?

November 30th, 2009 · 206 Comments

Exhibit A, as seen by an anonymous submitter in Seattle?

YOU TOOK THE VIDEO CAMERA AND ALL THE TAPES OF MY FIRST BORN CHILD'S BIRTH

…or exhibit B, as spotted by Mitch in Goldendale, Washington?

I'm sorry Tobby was stoled.

related: And God knows what

Tags: CAPS LOCK · comma diarrhea · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · guilt trip · karma's a bitch · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · stealing · Washington state

Waiting for the rapture (and/or a thank you note)

November 5th, 2009 · 159 Comments

Writes Ben in Snohomish, Washington: “We visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. She took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.”

passiveaggressivenotes.com: birthday card - waiting for the second coming (and/or a thank you note)

related: my condolences on your birthday

Tags: birthday · family · guilt trip · Jesus · most popular notes of 2009 · old folks · Washington state