Entries Tagged as '“helpful” advice'

More from the frontlines of post-post-feminism

August 17th, 2007 · 131 Comments

Writes Kristi in Chicago: “This was sent from our receptionist to the ENTIRE office (except, for some reason, me, until a coworker forwarded it so I wouldn’t miss out on the fun. It’s the receptionist’s job to order supplies and put away deliveries, but apparently she doesn’t like to do any heavy lifting. The last line really sent the office into a tizzy!”

(click to enlarge)

"...we are an office full of women and cannot lift the heavy boxes of copy paper"

It’s the second-to-last line that sends me into a bit of a tizzy…

Tags: "helpful" advice · Chicago · comma diarrhea · e-mail · moving/not moving · office · spelling and grammar police

Some creative brainstorming and flexible thinking

August 8th, 2007 · 108 Comments

Jenn in San Francisco received this little from a then-roommate who she lived with for a year but barely ever saw or spoke to. Says Jenn, “She was rarely seen outside the confines of her own room and seemed to prefer communicating electronically and then, only when absolutely necessary. So you can imagine, she probably stewed on the issue for a very long time. ” (Click the image to enlarge.)

some creative brainstorming and flexible thinking

Adds Jenn: Guess how this flexible-thinking roommate paid her bills? “By conducting CULTURAL SENSITIVITY TRAINING COURSES TO CORPORATE EMPLOYEES.”

Tags: "helpful" advice · e-mail · energy usage · lighting · money · roommates · San Francisco · smiley · temperature

Demotivationals

July 24th, 2007 · 33 Comments

An anonymous submitter in Jersey writes, “these ‘motivational signs’ are posted up in the copy room. I guess we’re supposed to pause and reflect upon whether we’re performing to the best of our abilities while waiting for our packets to cycle through the copier. All that the second one is missing is the ‘…shall we?’”

Some mistakes are hard to fix. Be careful, not sorry. Some jobs are hard to pass along. We miss you when you're away.

Deadlines are important. Let's meet them.

And all the first one needs is a little extra oomph…

MISTAKES

Tags: "helpful" advice · New Jersey · office

Paper is cheap

July 22nd, 2007 · 43 Comments

This note is from an the Philippines, but don’t try and write this off entirely as a “cultural thing.”

Camille in Manila says she finds “do not step on the toilet bowl” quite baffling, too, adding “stepping on the toilet could also mean probably stepping ‘into’ the toilet bowl itself, which is rather, uh, gross.”

Reminder: The Basics of Toilet Use

Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · office · Philippines · toilet

Happy to be of service

June 27th, 2007 · 72 Comments

Cassie in Orlando is a preschool teacher, and brings us this note posted by the school’s director. “I cannot help but be in awe of her after this note,” Cassie says, and I have to agree.

Teachers, We offer naptime as a service to our parents and younger children. After all, we all know growing bodies and minds need lots of rest. I understand that the long hours and darkness can be tempting, but laying down on the floor with a pillow may be frowned upon by parents entering the room; not to mention being against state regulations for the supervision of children. If you are too exhausted during the day, and you continue to fall asleep in the afternoon, feel free to come to me. We can discuss the option of cutting your hours back to a more appropriate smaller amount so you may get more rest. If that does not help the situation, I will be more than happy to help you find a night shift position. Unfortunately, we do NOT offer night shifts at this particular school. Happy to be of service, [heart] L

A classic, no?

related: From the Manager’s Book of Quotes for Inspiring Workplace Paranoia

Tags: "helpful" advice · excessive underlining · heart · now that's management · office · Orlando · schools & teachers · signed with love · sleeping · spelling and grammar police

The thoughts that count

June 25th, 2007 · 87 Comments

An anonymous Brooklyn mom sends in this choice — dare we say priceless — example of Park Slope’s well-documented mama drama.

We really do appreciate you handling the end of year gift collection and we know it can be a thankless task. I must say, however, that  I am feeling increasingly uncomfortable with the emphasis on how much money was collected and from whom. I thought the whole idea of giving a gift was that we gave from the heart, no matter the amount. Isn't that what we teach our children? Suddenly it feels like you are trying to shame those of us who may not have given the most for whatever out personal reasons not the less of which could be financial. Please let's not continue this embarrassment any longer. We should rethink the process for future gift-giving.

related: No money, no trophy

Tags: "helpful" advice · Brooklyn · e-mail · Moms & Dads · money · Park Slope · public shaming · rebuttals

Four approaches to ice cube maintenance

June 20th, 2007 · 35 Comments

Exhibit a) From Richmond, Virginia: the pedantic approach

How to Make Ice 1. If the ice tray is not empty — empty remaining cubes into white container on freezer door. (Please do not just fill the empty holes - it makes getting the frozen ones out impossible.) 2. Fill ice tray with water. 3. Put back in freezer

Exhibit b) From Minneapolis: the conditional approach

If you are unwilling to refill the ice cube trays, do not use the ice. Thanks in advance.

Exhibit c) From Hartford, Connecticut: the ALL for one and one for ALL approach

ICE. PLEASE TAKE ONLY A COUPLE OF ICE CUBES...These ice cubes are for ALL staff and for meetings. Please be sure that ice receptacle is pushed ALL the way BACK in the freezer!

Exhibit d) From Dallas: the federal government’s approach

Those that don't fill up the ice trays after emptying them, should be taken out and SHOT! RESPECT others...

(Thanks to Erik and Kim for their submissions.)

related: To the ICE GOBBLERS

Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · ice · office

Some suggestions for the comfort of your guest

June 19th, 2007 · 55 Comments

First, I’ll let Stephanie in Los Angeles explain the context for this one: “After a night of drinking, I let a friend of mine crash with me at my apartment. This friend, who does have her own apartment in the city, left with me in the morning, yet I still received this e-mail from my roommate later that day. This roommate hasn’t spoken to me in three months and communicates only in email.”

From: <redacted>@aol.com
To: <redacted>@hotmail.com
Subject: Guest
Date: Fri, 08 Jun 2007 16:00:31 -0400

Stephanie:

I assume Whitney is currently visiting. I apologize, but must say that in the situation you and I are currently in, I do not feel comfortable with you having a guest stay in our apartment while you are not present. But more so and more importantly, I do not feel comfortable with you having a guest in our apartment while I am home and you are not.

As I currently have summer hours at work, I will be home for the day at 2pm today. would like to respectfully request that you suggest to your guest that she go sightseeing and/or exploring the city from that time until the time you are to return from work.

As I have done my best to avoid the apartment for the last many months, you have had ample time to feel comfortable in our apartment without me being there. For the good majority of the last few months, the only time I ever have without you in the apartment is while you are at work. Now, with your friend there, I do not even have that. As it is only for today, while you are at work, I would really appreciate your friend not being in the apartment when I am and you are not.

Please understand that I am not trying to be mean, malicious, rude, vindictive or anything of the sort. I simply would like to enjoy some time alone in my own apartment without feeling uncomfortable at the presence of a guest of yours given the light of our current situation. If you’d like, I can give you some suggestions of places to have her visit during the day such as the Grove, Hollywood Blvd., the beach in Santa Monica, Venice, etc.

I’m sure on a beautiful day like today that she does not just want to lay in an apartment anyway. So if you already have her out roaming the city until you return from work, please disregard this email and thank
you immensely for your consideration.

-Angie

ps- could you please let me know how long Whitney is planning on
staying so I know if I will have to deal with this situation again next
week?? Thank you.

Adds Stephanie: “I just moved out of that apartment, and towards the end of my moveout day this roommate took some of my belongings and “donated” them to Goodwill. She said she didn’t think I needed them anymore.”

Tags: "helpful" advice · e-mail · Los Angeles · p.s. · roommates

Really, enough with the weather

June 18th, 2007 · 65 Comments

This one — from Cassandra in Toronto — makes me wince. Seriously, ouch.

Weather changes. Often. It's not always what you expect. Sometimes it is. Life is better if you are dressed appropriately for the weather. I think we have, pretty much, squared away the deal with weather.

Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · elevator · neighbors · rhetorical question · Toronto

Some suggestions for using the urinal

June 11th, 2007 · 17 Comments

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(from an anonymous urinal-user in Boulder, Colorado.)

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · CAPS LOCK · Colorado · excessive underlining · office · toilet