Entries Tagged as '“helpful” advice'

Let’s talk washing up, shall we?

June 7th, 2007 · 20 Comments

Any note that starts with “let’s” I kind of immediately love. This one was forwarded by Lindsay in Watford, England:

Tags: "helpful" advice · dishes · exclamation-point happy!!!! · office · U.K.

This room is protected by the Constitution

June 7th, 2007 · 75 Comments

This isn’t just a note — it’s a work of art. And it’s about 100 shades of amazing.

I’ll let Rich explain: “I had a party at my house once in college, and one of our roommates who was going to be gone was really scared that someone was going to sleep in his bed. so, instead of, you know, telling us not to use his room, he decided to post this hilarious note that only an aspiring personal injury lawyer could produce.”

This room is protected by the Constitution

I don't care if you just want a place to sleep STAY OUT. This is room is protected as later defined from trespassing. There is privileged information contain within.

Being in this room may be a violation of some or all of the following

Penalties Defined - per Iowa code + Federal law

related: CARE — it makes a difference

Tags: "helpful" advice · college life · excessive underlining · Iowa · more like crazy · not-so-veiled threats · questionable logic · roommates · TL;DR · touching

The Post-it Wars

June 4th, 2007 · 23 Comments

After receiving numerous “helpful tips” from her roommate at the University of Minnesota…

Tips for keeping counters clean!

TIP: If you use the sponge, squeeze it out and put it on the side of the sink. It will last longer and not get stinky! Thanks

DISH ETIQUETTE:  1) Please soak pots & pans IMMEDIATELY after use.  2) Put dishes in dishwasher right after washing them out.   3) Place cleaned cookware on a towel next to the sink.  4) Rinse dishes right after use.  5) Be considerate!

…Lydia decided to add a few “tips” of her own. (The large signs on the oven and the microwave were already there.)

Roommate's revenge

related: Meet the world’s crankiest roommate

Tags: "helpful" advice · blitzkrieg approach · cleaning · college life · dishes · etiquette · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · kitchen · microwave · Minnesota · rebuttals · roommates · sponges

When Ph.d.s get frustrated

June 3rd, 2007 · 115 Comments

Says Dave in New York City: “I love that this note contains a fairly detailed explanation of Lord Kelvin’s formulation of the second law of thermodynamics….and a helpful diagram!”

ATTENTION: Please do not run the a/c with the window open.

Complete with unnecessary diagram

related: When you get down to it

Tags: "helpful" advice · college life · It's science! · most popular notes of 2007 · temperature · TL;DR · visual aids

If you sprinkle ellipses when you tinkle…

June 3rd, 2007 · 24 Comments

Maybe it’s the manic use of ellipses and exclamation points, but this note makes me extremely uncomfortable.

Says submitter Erica in New York City, “As bad as it can get in the ladies’, I’ve been told the men’s bathroom is even worse.”

PLEASE LADIES........PLEASE

Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · bullet points · Comic Sans Alert · ellipses-crazed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · hygiene · New York · office · spelling and grammar police · toilet

Stay home!!!

June 2nd, 2007 · 24 Comments

Are you sneezing, achey, coughing or just feeling lousey? Well the best remedy for it is to stay home!!! And it is the best remedy for us healthy people, too.

(from an anonymous submitter in Maryland.)

Tags: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy!!!! · illness · kitchen · Maryland · office · spelling and grammar police

Let’s start with some basic bathroom etiquette.

June 1st, 2007 · 23 Comments

“I was out of the country for a week, and when I came back, I found this gem taped to the bathroom mirror,” explains our anonymous submitter in New York City”" (a.k.a. ‘Pig’). ”I’ve since moved out of the apartment — after she accused me of peeing on the bathroom floor and into the non-existent bathroom air freshener, and I decided I couldn’t take any more of her.”

Let's start with some basic bathroom etiquette.

Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · bathtub · hair · hygiene · New York · roommates · toilet

Switch to tea

May 31st, 2007 · 9 Comments

This note is like the teenager who manages to contain themselves long enough to grudgingly recite a lengthy mandated apology, but then can’t resist turning around and giving the finger afterwards…or the perky flight attendant who finally cracks when the drunk fat guy hits the call button again at the end of a long flight. Mmm, feel the repressed rage!

Coffee Etiquette: Please be courteous to your fellow employees. If you drain a pot or leave very little left, make a new pot. Don't simply turn off the burner and walk away. If there is less than a full pot between the 2, pour one into another and make a fresh pot. It only takes 30 seconds to put the coffee into a filter and push a button. If that is too difficult, maybe you should switch to tea.

(Thanks to Jenn in Hudson, Ohio for submitting!)

RELATED:

Rage against the coffee machine

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · coffee · etiquette · office · Ohio

Yeah, I got fired…but that Hot Pocket sure was worth it.

May 30th, 2007 · 14 Comments

This exercise in redundancy is brought to us by Erika in Los Angeles. It’s like the note-writer couldn’t decide which tactic would be most effective and just opted for all of the above.

REMEMBER!

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · excessive underlining · food · guilt trip · high on highlighter · Los Angeles · not-so-veiled threats · office · office fridge · pleasantries as afterthought · spelling and grammar police · stealing

Microwaves for Dummies

May 27th, 2007 · 7 Comments

I agree with Katrina in Ann Arbor, Michigan — the last  ”…etc.” bullet point is what makes the sign totally genius. And, apparently, effective.

Katrina adds, “Our microwave is a pristine fucking sanctum suitable for storing, say, the Dead Sea Scrolls, so maybe people are leaving the shrink wrap on their Lean Cuisines.”

REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT USE THIS MICROWAVE

Tags: "helpful" advice · bullet points · cleaning · Michigan · microwave · odor · office