Entries Tagged as 'holiday spirit'

On the naughty list

December 19th, 2014 · 20 Comments

Our submitter in Townsville, Australia says that Christmas decorating season is in full swing.Unfortunately, all those strings of lights have set off a string of front-yard vandalism as well. And in Townsville, people take their Christmas lights seriously

In the spirit of the season, one disgruntled resident has added this sign to his decor. “I’m not sure how the choice profanity will go down with hundreds of cars full of children passing by every night,” she writes.  (Please note that our submitter has pre-censored the profanity from the photo, in deference to our readers’ delicate sensibilities.)

To the mongrel who stole all my solar candy canes and broke my fairy lights - I hope you're happy with yourself. Wishing you a big Merry Fuck you!!

Meanwhile, in Michigan, I think this local news headline says it all:
Beheaded Mickey Mouse Christmas decoration leaves Davison resident upset, children scared

Well, in any case, it says considerably more than the accompanying photo of this terrifying scene:

My favorite quote from the article:

“She was able to sew Mickey back together and use some Gorilla tape to patch up the gingerbread man, but some of her children’s innocence has been lost.”

related: Decor-nappings of Christmases past

extra credit: Queenslander risks death for killer Christmas light display”  [abc news brisbane]

Tags: Australia · Christmas · holiday spirit · stealing · the F word · Won't somebody think of the children?

This kind of attitude is what’s really scary.

November 4th, 2014 · 154 Comments

Writes Derek from Ohio: “I found this on an anthropological blog I follow and thought it would fit great on your site.” I agree, Derek, I agree!

Due to the fact that people truck their kids in from other neighborhoods by the dozens, this house will no longer be handing out candy.   Thank you for ruining halloween for us and the children who ACTUALLY LIVE HERE.   Thanks for understanding.   Now, GO AWAY!

related: No candy go away!

extra credit: Do I have to give candy to poor kids? [slate.com]

Tags: casual sexism · Halloween

You dirty rat, you killed my childhood

September 21st, 2014 · 92 Comments

Sue in Northbrook, Illinois says that some 10 months after tricking her 6-year-old daughter with Jimmy Kimmel’s “I told my kids I ate all their Halloween candy” challenge, little Mia remembered the prank and, with a renewed sense of outrage, stormed off to express her anger in note form.

Mia’s mom notes that she’s normally referred to as “Mommy” by her daughter (and by her friends as “Sue”), so she knew she was in trouble when she saw this missive addressed to “Susan.”

Cupcakes are sweet like Mia. The ground is dirty like Susan. Why did you play the jolk [sic]

related: The Parent Tax

Tags: candy · Chicago · Halloween · kids · Mother-daughter notes

I love you…but I love you more when you’re skinny.

February 11th, 2014 · 101 Comments

Writes Joshua in Salt Lake City: “This past year I’ve been trying to lose weight. It’s been up and down. Apparently my mother knows that.”

Happy Valentine's Day Josher! 'Skinny Josh Bag' Proud of you! What's the day without the candy bag...just 'Chew & Spit'

related: Mom is my favorite passive-aggressive Valentine

Tags: heart · hey fatty · Mother-son notes · Salt Lake City · signed with love · Valentine's Day · xoxo

The Mom with the Reindeer Tattoo

December 24th, 2013 · 58 Comments

Writing Persephone in New Hampshire: “My father and I have a habit of snatching the Christmas cookies. I guess this year my mom had had enough.”

DO NOT TOUCH or Santa Claus will have 6 elves with halitosis read Norwegian crime novels to you as you are tied to a dyspeptic reindeer...I wouldn't chance it if I were you!

P.S. Yes, Stieg Larsson is Swedish…but titling this post “Blood on Snow” just seemed a little too dark.

related: Mad Santa

Tags: Christmas · Moms & Dads · touching

Tis the season for white lies, kid.

December 22nd, 2013 · 109 Comments

Writes Siegrin in California: “My friend started teaching at a new school this year and received this note from one of her (fifth-grade) students on the last day before the holiday break. It’s almost as uplifting as the doughnut she received from her fellow teacher, along with a note that read, ‘If you’re watching your weight, feel free to not eat the doughnut.”

Dear Mrs. A, thank you for being our teacher and teaching us as best you can. I wanted Mrs. F or Mr. C but I was wrong. You are the Best Teacher Ever! Thank you for being the best and trying to teach us the best you can to pass every test. Thank you and Merry Cristmas!! (Star, Heart, Happy Face)

related: You’re a good student, but not my best speller

Tags: California · Christmas · just being honest · schools & teachers

Also, Santa hates you

December 12th, 2013 · 165 Comments

Writes our submitter from Portland, Oregon: “People steal out of the fridge all the time, so I’m not sure why someone thought money would be safe taped to barbecue sauce.”

Happy Holidays Co-Workers! Are you $2 richer? Did you find $2 taped to a bottle of BBQ sauce in the fridge? Well that means you are a thief! Also Santa hates you and I hope a Reinder poops on you. Merry Christmas you dirty animal!

related: I hope you…

Tags: Christmas · holiday spirit · money · most popular notes of 2013 · office fridge · stealing

The potluck pedant

November 26th, 2013 · 91 Comments

Writes our submitter in Washington state: “Shortly after our holiday party signup sheet was posted, this gentle reminder appeared, taped over the word ‘potluck.’ So far, no one has been brave enough to sign up for anything.”

(Because, you know, the best kind of potluck is six bags of chips, three plates of cookies, a one liter bottle of soda, and some plastic forks.)

1. pot luck used in reference to a situation in which one must take a chance that whatever is available will prove to be good or acceptable.  This is not a potluck if you have to sign up to bring something.

related: THE POTLUCK THEME IS MONGOLIA[N] BBQ!!!!!

extra credit: Potluck fear and loathing [latimes.com]

Tags: holiday spirit · most popular notes of 2013 · obnoxious definition · office cop · party planning committee

Tis the season for KILLER DEALS

November 24th, 2013 · 78 Comments

Shortly after Denver’s first snowfall of the season, Sharon looked out her window to see her neighbor making a snowman. “I thought he was doing something cute for his girlfriend. Who knew it was actually a frosty political statement about the cold evils of capitalism?”

COUNTDOWN TO BLACK FRIDAY KILLER DEALS!!!!!

Adorable, innit?

related: Drivers of Walmart

Tags: holiday spirit

Is it really Baby Jesus stealing season again already?

November 18th, 2013 · 99 Comments

It’s not even Thanksgiving yet, but as Rachel in Victoria, B.C. noticed, nativity scenes are already becoming crime scenes.

I hate to say that and most of you may not even believe it, but there are people they steal

related: Baby Jesus is AWOL

Tags: British Columbia · Christmas · Jesus · most popular notes of 2013 · stealing · warning