Entries Tagged as 'kids'
As previously discussed, this hamfisted attempt at wit remains the scourge of retail establishments the world over.
As it turns out, the umpteen-million variations are even more hilariously clever!
For example, while the original version merely confuses a lot of people, this one just seems like a bizarre incentive for child abandonment.
Quickly, however, things start to get very un-p.c. (And also…very creepy.)
This version, in fact, is almost as popular as the original. (Other examples here and here and here and here and here and…is that a machete?)
Child slavery? Now that’s comedy gold. But really, why stop there? Why not “unattended children will be trafficked into child prostitution”? “Unattended children will be sold to pedophiles”? Or anally probed? or…
related: the “your mother doesn’t work here” of the hospitality industry
Tags: kids · kinda creepy · most popular notes of 2009 · oh no you didn't · retail hell
Nick in Florida was in his car one day, when he “pulled up at a light, looked to my left, and immediately started laughing.” He quickly pulled out his iPhone, snapped a photo, then get stepped on the gas before daddy dearest could get out and beat the crap out of him.
Meanwhile, Lisa in Maryland spotted this in front of a small computer store near her office.
Sigh. Children are such a blessing!
related: and pull up your sign
Tags: car · Florida · kids · Maryland · Moms & Dads · smartass · smiley
Shortly after the birth of her new nephew (a.k.a “Gee-Gee-Boo”), Liz in Waltham, Mass. received this note (channeling grandmothers everywhere) from the precocious 7-year-old daughter of her other sister. Writes Liz: “I love that she is simultaneously trying to guilt trip me into having a kid while not-so-subtly hinting that Baby G should move up to the Boston area.”
Meanwhile, an eight-year-old in San Marcos, California is also finding a good use for those “friendly letter” skills he learned in school.
related: P.P.S. do you really have a belly like a bowl full of jelly?
Tags: family · guilt trip · kids · signed with love
“My 8-year-old daughter was concerned about all the pictures of Santa portraying him with a whip,” says Lisa in Orlando, “so she wrote him this letter, thinking he might appreciate her helpful advice on taking care of his animals.”
related: no girls allowed
Tags: "helpful" advice · Christmas · Florida · holiday spirit · kids · Orlando · p.s. · signed with love
Writes Bailey in Oklahoma: “My nine-year-old brother hung the original note on his door when I came home from college for Christmas. After I laughed it off, he left a special note just for me. When I walked in anyway, he yelled, “Didn’t you see the sign?!?’ I can’t believe I’m being patronized by a third-grader.”
(Don’t worry, Bailey, you’re not the only one.)
related: No kids allowed!
Tags: battle of the sexes · kids · siblings · visual aids
Happy Valentine’s Day, kids!
(Thanks to Ron in West Jordan, Utah, who found this note taped to his front door.)
related: wake me up? wham!
Tags: kids · spelling and grammar police · spurned lover · Utah
My former roommate Eric inspired this roundup (and an overly dramatic round of gagging/hair-pulling/eye-gouging on my part) by passing along a photo of this sign spotted on Marco Island, Florida — though it could have been anywhere on Main Street, USA. (Note the small print at top, which reads: “Signs sold in our gift shop.”)
I think the only thing that could make this sign more irritating would be if it said — shudder — “expresso.” This sign must be stopped!
related: Unattended children will be shot
Tags: "customer service" · Florida · kids
September 25th, 2007 · 79 Comments
From Jasmine in Georgia…
Tags: excessive underlining · Georgia · kids · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · rainbow-colored