“This was posted after the author cleaned the house which consisted entirely of her own mess,” says our anonymous submitter in the U.K.
Of course, when you live with multiple roommates, it’s always somebody else’s mess. (Or should I say…I’ts?)

related: May the sanctity of the sink prevail!

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“Some serious shit must have gone down with the previous office toaster,” says our anonymous submitter from Canada. (Maybe it was left without wearing any socks or shoes?)

Meanwhile, Marilyn in Pittsburgh says that her office lunchroom has inexplicably gone through nearly half a dozen toasters over the past year. “It’s unclear as to what keeps happening [...]

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Vaguely fishy notes like this one from Toronto are pretty common around office kitchens…

…but I’ve never seen a note that gets right to the point quite like this one from Amber in San Francisco.

related: It’s not a race (it’s a social construct)

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I was really hoping this would die before I’d get around to posting about it, but more than four months later, it appears the  “Imma Let You Finish” meme is still chuggin’ along. I’m gonna chalk it up to end-of-the-year insta-nostalgia and, well, let it finish.

P.S. Speaking of Tillamook cheddar, Doug Fir in Portland makes [...]

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Back in my college newspaper days, the pizzas in the back room always ended up, by the end of the night, completely decimated — some slices had the cheese picked off, others had the crusts nibbled away, and then those slices were oh-so-charitably left in the pizza box, presumably with the idea that some other, [...]

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Rachel spotted this on a frat house fridge in Champaign, Illinois, adding: “Said fridge was indeed revolting.”

Meanwhile, Helen swiped this from an equally revolting frat house in Vancouver. Adds Helen: “The reason why it is so ripped up is because a frat boy saw me steal the note and we fought for it for a [...]

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Writes Jim in Colorado: “When I attempt to cook, I typically use way too many pots, pans and utensils and sometimes tend to skip instructions. (I actually made hard-boiled eggs and set the smoke detectors off.) Anyway, the other night I made cheeseburger pie and forgot to precook the meat. I woke up the next morning [...]

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Alec in Houston found this little work of art on his desk, he says, “after I went out for lunch and didn’t do the dishes like they had asked.” With gritted teeth, he goes on: “They have ‘too much work’ and I have ‘none’ so I might as well wash them!”

related: Al Gore knows you [...]

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(Thanks to Graham in Cambridge, Mass.)
related: I can has guilt trip?
extra credit: Pope’s Easter message mostly passive-aggressive guilt trip

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our anonymous submitter in tel aviv spotted this note outside the kitchenette of a client’s office. in case your hebrew is a little rusty, she also provided an english translation:
please feel free to pour drinks, cut up food, warm things through, stir and mix food, chop food up very small, taste things and eat until [...]

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quelle horreur!  “a good week after using my roommate’s microplane to grate parmesan, this note showed up on the fridge whiteboard,” writes tori in (where else?) san francisco. “apparently microplanes are for ZESTING ONLY!”

(unless, of course, it’s a microplane zester/grater.)
related: notes white people leave

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you decide: which masterpiece is most worthy of the lisa frank award for the most artistic expression of repressed rage?
is it exhibit a, from a hip-hop retail store in california?

exhibit b, from an american college dorm?

or exhibit c, from a shared apartment in guelph, ontario?

oh, and ladies? as you busy yourself with your construction paper [...]

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As Rick in Tennessee can attest, sharing a fridge with more than two unrelated roommates can get tricky — even in the rare event that everyone manages to keep their paws to themselves. The upside? “While there’s no space in the fridge for food, I’ll never have to worry about running out of condiments.”

Meanwhile, in [...]

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We’ve received several copies of this instructive diagram, which the helpful illustrators of Graph jam have made available to coffee watchdogs the world over.

Seeing people print their passive-aggressive flowcharts off the Internet makes our resident nerd, Eric, sentimental for simpler times. He quietly reflects on time spent wandering the halls of Brown University’s CS department [...]

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Our anonymous submitter says this display is just one of many microwave missives his coworker has created. “Someone tore it down and threw it on the floor once,” he says, “but she put it back up, laminated with heavy-duty tape.”

And of course, the art-imitating-life inspiration for this post: Pam Beesly.

related: To each his own microwave
extra [...]

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“these are the results of your typical no-one-washes-their-dishes-at-the-office situation,” says our submitter in portland, oregon.
“there used to be a note above the sink that said “NOT YOUR MAMA,” but it was replaced with these gems, both of which sort of creep me out (and neither of which has ameliorated the dirty dish issue).”

meanwhile, elsewhere in [...]

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The tenth-floor kitchen at this office has no fewer than ten of these painstakingly laminated, clip-art-covered notes — and our anonymous submitter says this kitchen is only the tip of the iceberg.
“Nearly all of the notes in our office receive the same attention to detail,” our submitter says. “Every time I come to work I [...]

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our anonymous submitter sneakily snapped a photo of the whiteboard at a friend’s house in urbana, illinois.

related: oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty!

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our anonymous submitter says his coworkers were taking stacks of paper towels from the bathroom and putting them in kitchen. “HR evidently does not agree with this practice and decided to enact a one-towel play in the break-room kitchen,” he says. (the office billing manager added the follow-up on the towels’ behalf.)

related: this is not [...]

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As this sign from a Montgomery, Alabama break room shows, “PopCorn Users” remain one of the most persecuted groups in the workplace today.

related: bizarre pardoning accident

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“a few years back i was living in a halfway house in canberra where theft from the communal kitchen was a common problem,” writes alex in australia. “one morning we woke to discover that the fridge had gone missing.” (the coffee in question was stolen from a cupboard, but apparently the owner thought removing the [...]

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i didn’t think i’d ever see a kitchen appliance more inappropriately anthropomorphized than this fridge, but i think this dishwasher note (from an anonymous submitter in england) dials the WTF-factor up to 11.

related: the passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved

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“my friend katelyn’s roommate left her this note before she went away for memorial day weekend last year,” says monica in boston. “i love how it starts off so BFF-like…then takes a sharp left into passive-aggressive territory.”

adds monica: “while katelyn normally likes to avoid confrontation, i think this note pushed her over the edge. she [...]

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with finals and thesis deadlines coming up, stress levels among grad students at uc-berkeley have been running high (which means attention to the finer points of, say, apostrophe use, are running low). and now there’s a lunch thief on the loose!

sadly, says our submitter, the note’s multi-pronged approach (guilt, threats, helpful advice) seems to [...]

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this note represents pretty much everything about office culture that makes me cringe. appropriately enough, i can’t even bring myself to call out the specifics — it’s just too overwhelming. (but the sign will always be there…every day, taunting me.)

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