back in my college newspaper days, the pizzas in the back room always ended up, by the end of the night, completely decimated — some slices had the cheese picked off, others had the crusts nibbled away, and then those slices were oh-so-charitably left in the pizza box, presumably with the idea that some other, [...]
Entries Tagged as 'kitchen'
the nibbler: the plague of office breakrooms everywhere
September 15th, 2009 · 99 Comments
Tags: food · kitchen · office · thanks (but not really)
make an effing wish
June 25th, 2009 · 93 Comments
rachel spotted this on a frat house fridge in champaign, illinois, adding: “said fridge was indeed revolting.”
meanwhile, helen swiped this from an equally revolting frat house in vancouver. adds helen: “the reason why it is so ripped up is because a frat boy saw me steal the note and we fought for it for a [...]
Tags: canada · cleaning · fratboys · fridge · roommates · university · vancouver
happy reinforcing gender stereotypes day!
June 21st, 2009 · 112 Comments
writes jim in colorado: “when i attempt to cook, i typically use way too many pots, pans and utensils and sometimes tend to skip instructions. (i actually made hard boiled eggs and set the smoke detectors off.) anyway, the other night i made cheeseburger pie and forgot to precook the meat. i woke up the next morning [...]
Tags: food · kitchen · moms & dads
and a very happy earth day to you
April 22nd, 2009 · 86 Comments
alec in houston found this little work of art on his desk, he says, “after i went out for lunch and didn’t do the dishes like they had asked.” with gritted teeth, he goes on: “they have ‘too much work’ and i have ‘none’ so i might as well wash them!”
related: al gore knows you [...]
Tags: a little patronizing · dishes · houston · office · thanks (but not really) · the earth
the easter bunny is such a passive-aggressive little fucker
April 9th, 2009 · 94 Comments
(thanks to graham in cambridge, mass.)
related: i can has guilt trip?
extra credit: pope’s easter message mostly passive-aggressive guilt trip
Tags: cleaning · fridge · holiday spirit · roommates
definitely not kosher for passover
April 2nd, 2009 · 166 Comments
our anonymous submitter in tel aviv spotted this note outside the kitchenette of a client’s office. in case your hebrew is a little rusty, she also provided an english translation:
please feel free to pour drinks, cut up food, warm things through, stir and mix food, chop food up very small, taste things and eat until [...]
Tags: hebrew · kitchen · noise · office · shit · the middle east
more notes white people leave
March 30th, 2009 · 247 Comments
quelle horreur! “a good week after using my roommate’s microplane to grate parmesan, this note showed up on the fridge whiteboard,” writes tori in (where else?) san francisco. “apparently microplanes are for ZESTING ONLY!”
(unless, of course, it’s a microplane zester/grater.)
related: notes white people leave
Tags: "helpful" advice · kitchen · roommates · san francisco · whiteboard
girls gone wild…with colored markers
March 10th, 2009 · 129 Comments
you decide: which masterpiece is most worthy of the lisa frank award for the most artistic expression of repressed rage?
is it exhibit a, from a hip-hop retail store in california?
exhibit b, from an american college dorm?
or exhibit c, from a shared apartment in guelph, ontario?
oh, and ladies? as you busy yourself with your construction paper [...]
Tags: art · dishes · disturbingly detailed · heart · rainbow-colored · signed with love · smiley · university · your mother doesn't...
deviled egg, anyone?
January 26th, 2009 · 119 Comments
as rick in tennessee can attest, sharing a fridge with more than two unrelated roommates can get tricky — even in the rare event that everyone manages to keep their paws to themselves. the upside? “while there’s no space in the fridge for food, i’ll never have to worry about running out of condiments.”
meanwhile, in [...]
Tags: d.c. · fridge · roommates · tennessee
the nerd’s guide to passive-aggressive behavior
December 15th, 2008 · 72 Comments
we’ve received several copies of this instructive diagram, which the helpful illustrators of graph jam have made available to coffee watchdogs the world over.
seeing people print their passive-aggressive flow charts off the internet makes our resident nerd, eric, sentimental for simpler times. he quietly reflects on time spent wandering the halls of brown university’s CS [...]
Tags: coffee · flow chart · ice · kitchen
sincerely, disappointed
November 20th, 2008 · 126 Comments
our anonymous submitter says this display is just one of many microwave missives his coworker has created. “someone tore it down and threw it on the floor once,” he says, “but she put it back up, laminated with heavy-duty tape.”
and of course, the art-imitating-life inspiration for this post:
related: to each his own microwave
extra credit: pam [...]
Tags: CAPS LOCK · highlighter · microwave · new york · not-so-veiled threats · obnoxious definition · office · spelling and grammar police
law & order: special dishes unit
November 16th, 2008 · 114 Comments
“these are the results of your typical no-one-washes-their-dishes-at-the-office situation,” says our submitter in portland, oregon.
“there used to be a note above the sink that said “NOT YOUR MAMA,” but it was replaced with these gems, both of which sort of creep me out (and neither of which has ameliorated the dirty dish issue).”
meanwhile, elsewhere in [...]
Tags: dishes · kinda creepy · office cop · portland
a sign (or ten) that your HR department might have too much time on their hands
September 21st, 2008 · 144 Comments
the tenth-floor kitchen at this office has no fewer than ten of these painstakingly laminated, clip-art-covered notes — and our anonymous submitter says this kitchen is only the tip of the iceberg.
“nearly all of the notes in our office receive the same attention to detail,” our submitter says. “every time i come to work i [...]
Tags: "helpful" advice · blitzkrieg approach · clip art catastrophe · gloriously redundant · microwave · office · office fridge · popcorn
the sink half-empty
September 4th, 2008 · 66 Comments
our anonymous submitter sneakily snapped a photo of the whiteboard at a friend’s house in urbana, illinois.
related: oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty!
Tags: dishes · dishwasher · excessive underlining · illinois · rebuttals · roommates · signed with love · urbana · whiteboard
currently on the table: a guest towel visa program
September 1st, 2008 · 74 Comments
our anonymous submitter says his coworkers were taking stacks of paper towels from the bathroom and putting them in kitchen. “HR evidently does not agree with this practice and decided to enact a one-towel play in the break-room kitchen,” he says. (the office billing manager added the follow-up on the towels’ behalf.)
related: this is not [...]
Tags: anthropomorphism · kitchen · office supplies · rebuttals
especially deborah
August 17th, 2008 · 215 Comments
as this sign from a montgomery, alabama breakroom shows, “PopCorn Users” remain one of the most persecuted groups in the workplace today.
related: bizarre pardoning accident
Tags: alabama · bold-underlined-caps · excessive underlining · gloriously redundant · highlighter · irregular capitalization · microwave · montgomery · popcorn
bleak house
July 31st, 2008 · 217 Comments
“a few years back i was living in a halfway house in canberra where theft from the communal kitchen was a common problem,” writes alex in australia. “one morning we woke to discover that the fridge had gone missing.” (the coffee in question was stolen from a cupboard, but apparently the owner thought removing the [...]
Tags: CAPS LOCK · actions speak louder · australia · canberra · fridge · money · questionable logic · roommates · stealing · you call that punctuation?
i asked santa for a baby alive, and all i got was this stupid dishwasher
July 2nd, 2008 · 145 Comments
i didn’t think i’d ever see a kitchen appliance more inappropriately anthropomorphized than this fridge, but i think this dishwasher note (from an anonymous submitter in england) dials the WTF-factor up to 11.
related: the passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved
Tags: CAPS LOCK · anthropomorphism · bold-underlined-caps · dishes · dishwasher · mixed metaphors · sad face · shit · u.k. · wtf?
oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty!
June 10th, 2008 · 150 Comments
“my friend katelyn’s roommate left her this note before she went away for memorial day weekend last year,” says monica in boston. “i love how it starts off so BFF-like…then takes a sharp left into passive-aggressive territory.”
adds monica: “while katelyn normally likes to avoid confrontation, i think this note pushed her over the edge. she [...]
Tags: dishes · heart · mean girls · p.s. · roommates · smiley · university
maybe it’s time for sally struthers to get involved
May 14th, 2008 · 141 Comments
with finals and thesis deadlines coming up, stress levels among grad students at uc-berkeley have been running high (which means attention to the finer points of, say, apostrophe use, are running low). and now there’s a lunch thief on the loose!
sadly, says our submitter, the note’s multi-pronged approach (guilt, threats, helpful advice) seems to [...]
Tags: apostrophe abuse · berkeley · california · food · fridge · kitchen · preggers · stealing · the homeless · university · warning

