Entries Tagged as 'kitchen'

Microwave Business: A Story of Teamwork

April 21st, 2014 · 80 Comments

Writes our submitter in Washington, DC: “In my time at my job, the only real evacuations we’ve had are for the Virginia Earthquake, and, now, a microwave popcorn incident. While another floor was responsible, multiple members of my department took this as an opportunity to make statements about the frequent state of our very own sad microwave. I think this is a fine example of how a committed team can work together to create a masterpiece.”

Oh my, the popcorn fire photo of shame!

(just click the photo above to enlarge)

related: Especially Deborah

Tags: D.C. · microwave · popcorn · that's a fire hazard

A wife of noble character…does all the dishes?

April 16th, 2014 · 97 Comments

Writes Julia, a student at an evangelical university in Indiana: “In our graduate student offices, there are more crusty dishes and microbial communities to be found than in the labs next door. After four weeks of mugs, oatmeal bowls and lunch containers had built up, one lad took the most effective course of action and posted this encouraging note for us single ladies to know what it takes to catch ourselves a guy just like him.”

A wife of noble character, who can find?... She sets about her work vigorously; her arms strong for the tasks... She watches over the affairs [dishes] of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31 selections, NIV

related: Life at a Christian college

Tags: battle of the sexes · dishes · God

Dirty birds

March 12th, 2014 · 27 Comments

What’s tackier than a pimp cup crusted in rhinestones? How bout a pimp cup crusted in last weekend’s purple drank?

This cup is not Queen it's dirty please wash

(Thanks, CharChar!)

related: That’s punny

 

Tags: dishes · roommates

Aaaand…jazz hands!

January 29th, 2014 · 107 Comments

Who knew? Just add water to your ramen, and you end up with…ramen.

RAMEN PARTY!

But leave it alone and you get…a hot ramen dance party!

ramen party

This just in: According to our Seattle submitter, two of his office mates have started fires trying to microwave dry ramen. (NO PARTY FOR YOU!)

related: Four horsemen…and a microwave

Tags: clip art catastrophe · microwave · office · Seattle · that's a fire hazard

Sign, cosign…and off on a tangent

November 25th, 2013 · 35 Comments

Ever wonder how MIT undergrads spend their free time? Well, thanks to Benjamin in Boston, you have your answer:

Please make bigger signs. It will encourage people to read your signs.

related: How’s that for a group effort?

Tags: college life · dishes · most popular notes of 2013 · note wars · smartass

Four horsemen…and a microwave

October 15th, 2013 · 25 Comments

Rachel in California says the breakroom at her office hasn’t caused many problems in the past, but a recent wave of new hires has changed that. “The last time I opened the microwave it was stuffed with paper towels, the walls were slathered in orange goop, and it smelled like rotting horse flesh.” (In other words, like a frozen lasagna from Tesco?)

Is this a post-apocalyptic world where the blacks and whites of morality have blurred into a hazy grey and every man takes care of himself and only himself? No? Then CLEAN THE MICROWAVE AFTER YOU USE IT!

related: Someday, when society has all but crumbled around you…

Tags: California · cleaning · microwave · office

Roaches can’t read

September 23rd, 2013 · 23 Comments

Well, he has a point.

This is the second / 3rd morning I have entered the kitchen and seen a roach. Part of the problem I am sure, is the lack of respect when it comes to taking care of this shared space. Dishes should be washed and not left with food on them to fester. Whoever leaves dishes in the sink for days in a row can fish them out of the garbage prior to next use. You're welcome.  While I agree that dishes in the sink are gross and inconsiderate use of our shared space (and I always rinse mine), a better strategy might be to call facilities and let them know of the insect issue as cockroaches can't read your passive aggressive notes.  Just saying.

…but then again, what good passive-aggresive note pays attention to silly things like “reason” or “logic”?

Let this be a warning to you roach M.F.ers!

related: An academic epidemic

Tags: dishes · office · rebuttals · warning

Hotheads & potheads

September 18th, 2013 · 23 Comments

Move it along, stoners…

This is a Hibiscus plant Do not cut! This is not a marijuana plant! Cutting anymore from this irreplaceable plant will KILL it!

And while you’re at it…

This is my pot. Wash it NOW.

(Thanks to Cindy in Spokane and Anonymous in Queens submitting!)

related: Yo, hemphead!

Tags: dishes · drugs · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens

Sorry, I can’t hear you over all the chattering appliances

June 25th, 2013 · 93 Comments

Our submitter in Fort Collins, Colorado was a bit taken aback at the site of this local business’s breakroom. “The level of commitment dedicared to naming and creating backstories for the appliances was…mindboggling,” she says.

Indeed, my mind has been boggled.

Hello! We are the [redacted] break room appliances provided by [redacted] and we would like to introduce ourselves. Hello, I'm Mike the Microwave and I am the newest appliance to join the [redacted] Break Room team, replacing Monroe who retired. Hey there, my name is Collin and I'm the Coffee Machine. Howdy, Dante the Dishwasher here! Hi, I'm the big guy in the corner, Ramone the Refrigerator. Most of us have been here for a long time and we are thankful that [redacted] has provided us for your convenience and use. However since we are aging, we need a bit more TLC so each of us has written a little synopsis of how you can help us maintain our integrity and continue to work as best we can. We appreciate you being considerate of all persons who wish to use us. Thanks and please HELP us with our individual needs.

Mike, Collin, & the kitchen gang

Dante the Dishwasher

Collin the Coffee Machine

Mike the Microwave

related: The Needy Little Dishwasher

Tags: anthropomorphism · blitzkrieg approach · clip art catastrophe · Colorado · dishwasher · fridge · kitchen · microwave · office · TL;DR

Oh look, Reddit exploded in the kitchen.

June 19th, 2013 · 46 Comments

STAHP.

Kitchen signs are the best! SMALL KITCHEN SIGNS ARE BETTER. I disagree. I made a kitchen sign but I eated it. If you are the making coffee first thing in the morning, please rinse out the coffee pot. Thank you. Every time you use the last paper towel and don't replace the roll, a kitten cries (and then gets eaten slowly by a hungry, endangered polar bear. The new rolls are located in the cabinet behind you. Please replace it when necessary. Thanks...from the kittens. (The polar bears? Not so much. Still hungry.)

Every time you use the last paper towel and don't replace the roll, a kitten cries (and then gets eaten slowly by a hungry, endangered polar bear. The new rolls are located in the cabinet behind you. Please replace it when necessary. Thanks...from the kittens. (The polar bears? Not so much. Still hungry.)

related: The Internet is leaking.

Tags: cats · kitchen · Los Angeles · note wars · office · shameless meme-mongering