Entries Tagged as 'dishwasher'

The most unpleasant of pleasantries

July 22nd, 2010 · 197 Comments

So, Jen in Ontario, Canada just moved into a new shared living arrangement…with a 50-something lady. “I thought having an older person as a roommate would more peaceful,” she explains. “Turns out I was wrong.” Communication skills, it seems, aren’t one of those things that necessarily improve with age.

Within a week of moving in, Jen says, there were “helpful instructions” taped up all around the house. After that, the notes just kept coming, accusing Jen of everything from filling the dishwasher with soy sauce to sabotaging the tea kettle — always book-ended by a “Pls” and “Thank you,” of course. Because that’s how mature adults act.

Pls stop. Thank you!

Pls empty water in kettle after you've finished with it. The hard water destroys the bottom of the inside of the kettle. Thanks! (turn over page) Pls use Brita water in kettle out of small Brita pitcher in fridge. Thank you!

P.S. Also please rinse your dishes before you put things in dishwasher...to much soya sauce in dishwasher.

related: The Post-it Wars

Tags: "helpful" advice · blitzkrieg approach · cleaning · dishes · dishwasher · kitchen · laundry · old folks · Ontario · p.s. · roommates

The sink half-empty

September 4th, 2008 · 66 Comments

Our anonymous submitter sneakily snapped a photo of the whiteboard at a friend’s house in Urbana, Illinois.

Guys, can we stop leaving dishes on the edge of the sink + just put them in the sink or better yet in the dishwasher?

related: Oh sweetie, I love it when you talk dirty!

Tags: dishes · dishwasher · excessive underlining · Illinois · rebuttals · roommates · signed with love · Urbana · whiteboard

When dishwashers speak

July 2nd, 2008 · 147 Comments

I didn’t think i’d ever see a kitchen appliance more inappropriately anthropomorphized than this fridge, but I think this dishwasher note (from an anonymous submitter in England) dials the WTF-factor up to 11.

PLEASE FEED ME  I EAT DIRTY PLATES AND SHIT OUT CLEAN ONES   THEY ARE YUMMY  LOAD ME UP WITH DISHES, OR I CRY :(

related: The passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved

Tags: anthropomorphism · bold-underlined-caps · CAPS LOCK · dishes · dishwasher · mixed metaphors · sad face · shit · U.K. · WTF?

P.S. Bacon is life

September 1st, 2007 · 200 Comments

The Coast newspaper in Halifax recently invited its readers to share their “passive-aggressive roommate tales.” (Gee, what a novel idea!)

My favorite part:

roommate2.jpg

Excerpts from a 34-point note sent to a former roommate:

2. Your rent was always late and it was not paid in full.

4. You used the dishes and baking ware that we provided to you and often did not clean them, left them to ruin, or left them for someone else to clean because you were too busy rushing out the door to go party when you had all day off. If you have all day off, do something more than try to find someone, anyone to hang out with that night that just so happens to have a car and is willing to pick your lazy ass up.

22. Your friends have no right to use and mess up our bathroom. You have your own, it’s part of your room. Also, if they are going to be putting fruit remains in our garbage can, have them removed before they rot. While we’re on the subject…

23. Fruit flies. Need I say more?

25. We were quite upset that you didn’t buy us anything for Christmas worth more than $3. It’s not the money really, but $1.50 each, that’s just insulting. We noticed that week you borrowed money from your current fling to go out and party. I hope you did buy a self-help book at Chapters like you said you were planning.

29. When people have to work very early in the morning, like at 5am, it’s not very nice to have your loud-mouthed boyfriend chatting with you all night, take it somewhere else. Like his mom’s house where he still lives…

30. The clogged toilet thing, you got off easy on that one. Plumbing and property damage is a lot more important than rushing out the door to hang out with your friends. Prioritize.

33. The comment you made about being the type of person who can’t live with someone is something you should take serious consideration of. How are you going to continue living your faux Sex and the City lifestyle if your goal in life is to find a man you can live with, and if you are not the type of person that can actually live with someone?” B.M.

Full story here; another choice excerpt after the jump.

[Read more →]

Tags: bullet points · Canada · cleaning · dishes · dishwasher · food · Halifax · money · revenge · roommates

Perhaps a committee to assess the health of the committee?

August 20th, 2007 · 100 Comments

“The Healthy Companies Committee,” explains Katherine in D.C., is the name of the office pep squad led by the sender of the e-mail. (“Ironically,” she adds, “he does not seem to be able to deal with his frustration in a ‘healthy’ way.”)

The hilarity of this note is more subtle than say, a “Thank you Terry,” but don’t be fooled: it’s not your garden-variety “do your dishes” note, either. (Pay particular attention to paragraphs one and four.) It’s like something straight out of a script from The Office.

what will it take?? (probably not an office-wide e-mail)

Don’t you wish you could read the earlier drafts?

Tags: comma diarrhea · confusion??? · D.C. · dishes · dishwasher · e-mail · exclamation-point happy!!!! · not-so-veiled threats · office · questionable logic · royal we · spelling and grammar police

Special people garage

June 21st, 2007 · 36 Comments

This is a special note indeed. The idiosyncratic spelling, spacing, and bolding are fascinating — and I love how the third sentence is so rhetorical it doesn’t even deserve a question mark. I think what I enjoy most, however, is the after-the-fact realization that the desired action here just wasn’t quite explicit enough.

Special people stop leaving your garage [sic]in the sink. This is not your home this is a staff kitchen for all to use.  Why should other people have to clean up after you Please have respect for others. Please put your dishes in the dishwasher.

(Thanks to Molly in Washington, D.C. for submitting!)

related: The needy little dishwasher

Tags: D.C. · dishes · dishwasher · kitchen · office · spelling and grammar police · that's disrespectful · You call that punctuation?

Is that a question or a command!?!?

June 6th, 2007 · 10 Comments

Found on the company dishwasher by Pete M….

DO NOT OPEN THIS MACHINE WHEN IT IS ON!?!? If you would like a lesson in telling the difference between the machine being on or not, please see reception

The text at the bottom reads: “If you would like a lesson in telling the difference between the machine being on or not, please see reception.” ) Now that’s a Power Point presentation I’d love to see.

related: The needy little dishwasher

Tags: CAPS LOCK · confusion??? · dishwasher · office · opening/closing