Entries Tagged as 'kitchen'

Everything you hate about office culture, in one cringe-inducing note.

March 21st, 2008 · 121 Comments

This note represents pretty much everything about office culture that makes me cringe. Appropriately enough, I can’t even bring myself to call out the specifics — it’s just too overwhelming. (But the sign will always be there…every day, taunting me.)

PLEASE MAKE SURE I AM CLOSED I HAVE ALOT OF FOODS IN MY BELLY I DON'T WANT TO GET WARM!

Tags: alot · anthropomorphism · CAPS LOCK · fridge · inane cartoon · kinda creepy · mixed metaphors · most popular notes of 2008 · Say wha? · spelling and grammar police · U.K.

Not to name names, but…

March 18th, 2008 · 84 Comments

World-renowned troublemaker Troy McClure forwards this e-mail from his department’s secretary in Sydney, Australia.

Would anyone know who has taken/borrowed most of the coffee mugs and tea cups from the kitchen on our level?

No big deal, you say? Take a second look at the addressee list. (Yes, JONATHAN, I’m talking to you.)

related: Just in case you didn’t catch the sarcasm

Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · dishes · message to all intended for one · overzealous secretary · Sydney

Bun — er, pizza — in the oven

February 29th, 2008 · 125 Comments

Zakir in Montreal came home one night to find his roommate, Tristan ferociously scribbling this note for his other roommate, Vincent.  Apparently, Tristan was baking cookies on Saturday night (aww) and when he turned on the stove, the entire apartment filled with smoke from the charred cardboard from Vince’s frozen pizza.

Says Zakir: “Vincent’s reply to the note was gold. He yelled: ‘Well, maybe next time you should CHECK the oven before you turn it on….WHAT IF THERE WAS A BABY IN THERE?!’ and then slammed his door behind him.”

Vince. Let this be a message to your other pizza cardboards. Take your cardboards out of the oven! -Tristan

Adds Zakir: “I’m not sure if those are hearts or flames all over the note, but I do know Tristan‘s face was scrunched with anger as he wrote it.”

Meanwhile, in Clemson, S.C…there is a baby in that oven.

This [redacted]'s pizza. [Redacted] is pregnant. If you know what is best for you, you will not eat a pregnant women's [sic] food. :) Love, ME!!

related: must have been a pretty big bite

Tags: double-entendre alert · heart · Montreal · oven · pizza · preggers · smiley · South Carolina · spelling and grammar police

Crazy is right

February 19th, 2008 · 217 Comments

In the office kitchen, expecting your coworkers to wipe up the spatters from their exploded Hot Pockets seems like standard enough microwave etiquette. And a ban on charred popcorn and leftover tuna casserole? Eh, fair enough. But this note — from an anonymous office worker in Baltimore — is the kind of thing that leads to out-and-out mutiny.

Please clear any unused time off the microwave when you are finished.  Some of us have O.C.D. and leftover time drives us crazy.  -Thanks!

UPDATE: There’s a copycat on the loose!

UPDATE 2: They’re multiplying!

The copycat; busted!

UPDATE 3: The meta-madness continues!

meta like whoa

UPDATE 4: It continues!

Yet another copycat!

related: Who are you calling OCD?

Tags: a little uptight · Baltimore · microwave · most popular notes of 2008 · office

Eau dear

February 11th, 2008 · 96 Comments

This oh-so-subtle note was posted by Mary’s former boss, “a pathetic professor in a backwater institution” where 90% of the graduate students happened to be Korean, Japanese, or Chinese.

“Nevermind that he doused himself with great lashings of Brut in an attempt to jazz up the bald-up-top-ponytail-in-back look he had going on,” Mary says. “There were a lot of things I could have said to him on a post-it, but I decided to be the big kid and quit.” Luckily for us, she swiped this note off the breakroom microwave first.

NO FISH. Is this subtle enough?

Interestingly, it seems fish-hating office workers elsewhere also share an affinity for clip art.

No fish in the microwave

When Heating Fish In the Microwave

Spongebob takes a stand

related: No smelly foods

Tags: a little insensitive · a matter of taste · clip art catastrophe · college life · excessive capitalization · fish · microwave · odor · office · spelling and grammar police

Crying over sour milk

January 29th, 2008 · 127 Comments

Ashley in Chicago says her roommates are the king and queen of passive-aggressive notes. (“If they ever found this site, they’d think it was a self help group,” she says.) The latest example:

Ashley’s still fuming over this one. “I mean, come on. Just throw it away yourself! You’re probably exerting more energy writing the email and stressing about it,” she says. “And why do you think I’ve been spending so much time at my boyfriend’s anyway?”

Tags: Chicago · cleaning · fridge · roommates · Would you mind?

Paul Newman: the Franz Ferdinand of the fridge

January 27th, 2008 · 86 Comments

This fridge saga (from a Boston-area university lab building) comes to us with a confession on the part of the anonymous submitter: she started it, sort of.

It all began when she discovered that her salad dressing had been mysteriously disposed of. Sad that she had to eat dry lettuce for lunch, she left a note (1) for the black hand responsible “in the least bitchy way I knew how.” She didn’t realize that her soundoff was actually a declaration of war.

There was a warning note for 1 week before it was cleaned.

Adds our submitter: “Needless to say, I think we have all been spending a little too much time in the lab.”

related: Great, your OCD just caused a diabetic coma. Happy?

Tags: college life · food · fridge · lab rats · Massachusetts · saga · whiteboard

Office anthropomorphism

December 29th, 2007 · 65 Comments

Many offices, it seems, are a regular Disneyland of what only appear to be inanimate objects. The evidence?

From Frank in San Francisco, a sentient sponge:

USE ME RINSE ME + help keep me from getting ICKY! Thank you, Sponge

From Amy in Annapolis, Maryland, a talking toilet:

DID YOU FLUSH ME AND WIPE OFF MY SEAT????

From Ben in San Antonio, Texas, a talking door:

I noticed I am not shut when people enter or exit. Please make sure I am shut upon exiting or entering. -The Door

And then there’s my favorite – from an anonymous submitter in Washington, D.C. – a talking (and walking) microwave:

If You Guys Don't Keep Me Clean I'm walking away from you If you don't Believe TRY M

(Most baffling…where on earth did that clip art come from?)

related: I guess that’s why

Tags: Annapolis · CAPS LOCK · cleaning · clip art catastrophe · confusion??? · D.C. · irregular capitalization · Maryland · microwave · opening/closing · San Antonio · San Francisco · Texas · toilet

Holy matrimony

December 4th, 2007 · 105 Comments

Karolina in Dallas says she typically tries to wait her husband out in situations like this one, but she almost always ends up caving — “particularly when mold is involved.”

1517646765_a40893d6be.jpg

related: 10 people, 1 kitchen

Tags: Dallas/Fort Worth · dishes · mold · sig o

When peaceniks get pissed

November 25th, 2007 · 56 Comments

Writes Ludovic from Geneva: “I went to Bil’in, a Palestinian village cut through by the security fence, for the weekly Friday demonstration. There’s a house there whose owner rents out the ground flat to activists to be used as a meeting place, sleeping hostel, that sort of thing. The day was obviously tense, but seeing the sign above the sink made us all smile.”

This is a passive-aggressive sign: DISHES!

Tags: dishes · The Middle East